goofyfan-12
<font color=purple>BL II - Purple Team<br><font co
- Joined
- Mar 23, 2006
- Messages
- 2,430
Cathie - ok, you asked for the truth so here it is. You are a guest in your parents' house and you have to remember that. It is wrong to expect them to change their lifestyle to suit yours (or to feed you at this point - you are an adult who has a job so it is time to take care of yourself). I am not sure if you know this or not, but I currently live at home right now and I never expect my parents to feed me. I pay them rent, do my own grocery shopping, my own chores and respect their rules and schedules as I am the guest there. Now, don't get me wrong, they drive me nuts from time to time with their expectations at times, but that is part of the charm of having roommates (whether they be husbands, boyfriends, finace's or family). I just remind myself that they are living their lives and I am living mine. Also, has it occurred to you that they are doing things for your brother to make up for the fact that they are partially supporting you by giving you a place to live? My mother freely admitted that she does some things for my sister and not for me in an attempt to even things out.
As far as their support of your brother what do you expect them to do - he is their son. It is probably killing your mom that he is in this mess in the first place and she is likely blaming herself for not doing a good enough job raising him so she may be overcompensating. Who knows, but her feelings are her feelings and you can't expect her to change them because you want her to. I think you are smart to get out of there, but only if what you are going to is an improvement in living conditions only and not a hiding spot from dealing with what is going on in front of you. Running away from the problem won't solve it. Resolving your feelings and your attitudes towards the situation will.
Sorry if this sounds harsh, but remember you asked for the truth.
As far as their support of your brother what do you expect them to do - he is their son. It is probably killing your mom that he is in this mess in the first place and she is likely blaming herself for not doing a good enough job raising him so she may be overcompensating. Who knows, but her feelings are her feelings and you can't expect her to change them because you want her to. I think you are smart to get out of there, but only if what you are going to is an improvement in living conditions only and not a hiding spot from dealing with what is going on in front of you. Running away from the problem won't solve it. Resolving your feelings and your attitudes towards the situation will.
Sorry if this sounds harsh, but remember you asked for the truth.