I'll pray for you......

[bcla]

Like I pretty much said in my apology it has been a decade sens I learned about the different preschools but I don't remember Montessori being a religious option I well be the first to admit it if I am wrong

From what I heard, Maria Montessori was a devout Catholic and believed that children should go to church with their parents. However, I don't believe that she espoused lessons that felt like the practice of religion, but rather wanted those religious/spiritual principles incorporated into the teaching.

 

[low-key]

I often say I will pray for you but I have two prayer list, one is where I pray and the other list is my pretend prayer list where I tell people they are on it, but never actually pray

 

[lifesavacation]

Lol! I wouldn't be offended. I'd probably laugh about it.

I've had 3 kids graduate so far and every school secretary I've met is like a guard dog. You don't want to cross them.

 

[aprilgail]

I always just say "no thanks I don't believe in that stuff"

 

[Wishing on a star]

No apology necessary, Tink!!!
I think we are all just trying to understand and clarify!

I do not have a lot of experience with Montessori, but I have never understood it to be a religious type of approach.

Not sure what the current organizations approach would be to this type of Christian behaving this way as one of the front-line staff???

 

[aprilgail]

I think some people are looking to be offended. How do you react when you sneeze and someone says "bless you"? Others need to learn what separation of church and state really mean.

Well I can answer this for my daughter- she says "keep your religion out of my nose"--- I typically just ignore when someone says that when I sneeze.

 

[Wishing on a star]

As others have said.... I would not be offended, at all, by a single well-meaning comment.
I am with those who feel that it seems that so many people are just so fragile and have to fall on knives to be offended by every possible thing.

I do feel, however, that this woman's behavior, in total, was very offensive. Especially in a professional capacity as the front staff.

 

[disykat]

I find it interesting that people think this thread is just about prayer or just about someone rubbing someone the wrong way.

IMO, this thread is about an employee of a place you trust with your child being very rude to you. I don't see how anyone thinks this lady was espousing religion.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I agree!!!
This woman is pushing her own moral/religious beliefs...
But, this about SO much more than that.

 

[aristocatz]

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

I would report her. Religion aside, it was a rude interaction.

 

[luvsJack]

Oh good grief. She wasn't pushing any beliefs.

She WAS rude. But reporting her after one rude encounter is a bit much. Everyone has a bad day. Everyone speaks without thinking sometimes. I think I would give it at least one more time before I went that extreme.

 

[leebee]

First- the secretary was way out of line here in being rude to you about your family and arrangements. I'm glad you reported her and will meet with someone about it.

Next- I find "I'll pray for you" to be reasonably condescending, no matter how the speaker meant the comment. Even if I believed in god, why would you think you should intervene in what should be a very personal relationship, i.e., my life and god? If someone says this to me, I usually respond with, "No thanks, not necessary, please don't." However, I think I'm about to swap over to "What a bizarre thing to say!" I really like that!

Finally- Montessori education. A true Montessori school offers a religiously neutral environment; it is not associated with any particular religious persuasion. However, Montessori education does not have any conflict with any religion, either. In fact, schools have been sponsored by groups representing non-sectarian interests as well as by the Catholic, Jewish, Protestant, Hindu and other faiths. Unless a religious group is sponsoring this Montessori school, there really is no place for this secretary to be espousing prayer and god in her discussions with a parent.

 

[Sabeking]

I have not read through the whole thread....but it sounds like she was being kind of a smarty pants by saying she would pray for you. She really wasn't saying that as genuine concern for you but being sarcastic.

 

[whitney250]

From what you've said, it seems that she used it as a passive aggressive insult, kind of like a southern "bless your heart". Most of the time when people say "I'll pray for you" it's genuine and coming from a good place. I am usually happy to hear "I'll pray for you" and I say "thank you", but when it's hateful I usually have some sort of retort.

 

[robinb]

Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

If anyone asked me that question, they would get quite a bit more than they expected! I'm an atheist and I would respond all the way from factual, "I'm not angry. I don't believe in god." all the way to an equally insulting comment as the one made to me (which I will not share here in deference to my Christian friends).

I would let it slide this time, but I would record every nasty interaction with her starting with the one with your wife and *gasp* your daughter's dancing. The woman is unhinged IMO and should not be around children. Once you have a pattern of passive and aggressive nastiness, I would report her butt. Be prepared to change child care facilities if you go forward, though. They may prefer their receptionist and her overt religiosity over your child.

 

[DawnM]

Sounds more like a Southern "bless your heart" than a true prayer. She is praying that you are a better parent. I would report her attitude, her comment, her intent, her eye rolling, her laughing at you, and the series of snark you have experienced. I am absolutely NOT offended when people pray for me, but in her case, she is praying you will be a better parent, which is her underhanded way of saying you are a bad one.

Yup, I would report.

 

[luvsJack]

I have noticed several of you have said "I usually respond" or "I always say". Do many of you get random "I will pray for you"s from random people?

I don't say it unless someone actually says "please keep us in your prayers" or if they tell me something horrible going on in their lives. And the usual response is thank you.

 

[dosekies]

I am not religious at all, but usually just say 'thank you'. However in your situation, I would have responded the same way!

 

[mom2rtk]

I probably would have said "I'll be sure to say a prayer for you too" and let it go.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Well, LuvsJack.... I just can not disagree with you any more strongly.
She was VERY rude... She passed negative personal moral judgements.... She openly challenged an unsuspecting paying customer regarding their feelings about God.... and then laughed and walked off on them.
All of this in a professional, not religious, setting.

Yes, was very very very rude and inappropriate. (can't begin to type enough 'very's here)
And, yes, when you openly and clearly challenge somebody about their spiritual / religious beliefs like that, you ARE judging and pushing and espousing your own personal beliefs and thoughts.
No question.... No question, at all.
IMHO, not even a hint of a question.

In fact, I take note of the specific people who are choosing to try to support or defend this person... Or clearly disregard DIS policies by posting and supporting their own religious thoughts about praying for others, etc...

And, this is coming from a spiritually Christian woman from the South.