If Your Sibling Didn't Come to Your Child's HS Graduation

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Depends on the relationship.

In FL, graduations often are outside and often humid and uncomfortable.

Why would it be necessary?

Now if you had many more kids and she attended all the other nieces and nephews' high school graduations and then jilted this one, I could see a more valid complaint.

I'm a bit jealous of folks whose extended families go to EVERYTHING for their nieces/nephews, grandkids. But sometimes, it is nice that we can enjoy things as our own nuclear family. Sure, it stung the first few times we got rejected for something. But we made do and noone got hurt in the long run.

If we remain homeschooling, I plan to have my kids do their graduation ceremony in FL at the homeschool convention their to increase the amount of family that could attend. But if they can't or don't want to--that would be okay as well (even if I might be slightly hurt).

Their attendance (or not) at the event does change what the child has accomplished.

 

[taximomfor4]

I want to reply before reading what anyone else said, so here goes...

No, I wouldn't be upset if an Aunt or Uncle couldn't make it to a commencement (it is the graduate's Aunt or Uncle being referred to, right?)

I wouldn't care if NOBODY went to my child's commencement. It's a big deal for some kids to have that ceremony to put the "rubber stamp" on their high school years with all their friends, and it's a big deal to many parents to have that huge Kodak moment. But other than that, the accomplishment is the bigger deal...the ceremony is just not.

 

[sparklynails23]

If the kid is making a speech or getting a bunch of awards, she should go. If not, she will only see her for the tassle turn, and that's skippable.

 

[MIGrandma]

I am not looking to start trouble. I don't even see where that is coming from. When DD told me she wasn't going to be able to come I said nothing to indicate I was upset about it. In fact I am NOT upset. It has nothing to do with ME. We continued our conversation (she usually stops in once or twice a week after she gets out of work, because she just lives up the road from us so drives right by here) and it wasn't even until after she left that I wondered if her brother would be hurt, so that is why I asked here. To see if it would upset others if their sibling didn't attend. That's all. I don't have siblings myself, so wouldn't know how it felt if one didn't attend something like that.

It's funny because I debated about starting this thread. But I didn't think there was anything about my original post that some people here would be able to "pick apart". I guess I should have known better.

 

[Minnesota!]

I think graduations are EXTREMELY boring and dont expect any relatives to attend them.

I don't invite any relative to anything....I find it all tedious. I know I wouldn't want to sit through spring concerts, graduations, plays, etc. for anyone but my child. I guess I expect that the same holds true for everyone.

 

[mjkacmom]

I'd have no problem with it. Heck, I don't even want to go (I sweated out 10 pounds at dd's middle school graduation). I remember when DH was considering going to his graduate school graduation when he got his MBA - heck no!

 

[Jennasis]

I am not looking to start trouble. I don't even see where that is coming from. When DD told me she wasn't going to be able to come I said nothing to indicate I was upset about it. In fact I am NOT upset. It has nothing to do with ME. We continued our conversation (she usually stops in once or twice a week after she gets out of work, because she just lives up the road from us so drives right by here) and it wasn't even until after she left that I wondered if her brother would be hurt, so that is why I asked here. To see if it would upset others if their sibling didn't attend. That's all. I don't have siblings myself, so wouldn't know how it felt if one didn't attend something like that.

It's funny because I debated about starting this thread. But I didn't think there was anything about my original post that some people here would be able to "pick apart". I guess I should have known better.

Having been to the rodeo many times myself, my rule of thumb now is if I even give myself pause before starting a thread, I don't start it at all.

 

[MIGrandma]

Having been to the rodeo many times myself, my rule of thumb now is if I even give myself pause before starting a thread, I don't start it at all.

I agree!!

 

[Pigeon]

I wouldn't be offended in the least. I didn't go to any of my many nieces or nephew's graduations (wasn't informed about them to begin with).The families did have graduation parties, which we attended and brought a gift.

I don't think they are a big deal, find them extremely tedious, and wouldn't expect or especially want my sibs to have to sit through them. In any event, in our public school, attendance requires a ticket and each family only gets a couple of them.

 

[Abbie]

I'm glad to see that of the posters responding so far, no one would be upset.

The graduation ceremony is being held indoors in the gymnasium, with chair seating on the floor and bleachers on each side plus one side has an upper level of bleachers as well so it can accommodate a lot of people and there are no restrictions on how many relatives/friends each graduate can invite.

That really surprises me! Every high school and college graduation we've attended have been set up exactly like you describe and you can bet there were limited tickets per graduate. And these were classes of just 300-400 students so not huge graduating classes.

I wouldn't even think twice if my sister/brother could not attend. In fact, with the limited tickets, it wouldn't even cross my mind to invite them. We only got 8 for DD's college grad last week and only 10 for DS next week. Between grandparents that are able and girlfriends/boyfriends and siblings, those tickets are taken quickly.

 

[jrmasm]

My husband's nephew is graduating in a few weeks. He goes to the same school district as our children so travel is not an issue for us. We're not going and I'm sure my SIL is going to be upset. She already told me that she's angry because their parents (husband's parents) aren't coming and they live 5 hours away.

 

[LisaNJ25]

Nope, not at all. As a matter of fact my son graduates next month and not even his siblings are going. we are limited to tickets, not sure of the total amount yet. I know when I graduated it was just my mom, dad and my husband there.

 

[MIGrandma]

That really surprises me! Every high school and college graduation we've attended have been set up exactly like you describe and you can bet there were limited tickets per graduate. And these were classes of just 300-400 students so not huge graduating classes.

I wouldn't even think twice if my sister/brother could not attend. In fact, with the limited tickets, it wouldn't even cross my mind to invite them. We only got 8 for DD's college grad last week and only 10 for DS next week. Between grandparents that are able and girlfriends/boyfriends and siblings, those tickets are taken quickly.

Our DGD's graduating class only has about a third of the class size you mentioned. No tickets needed.

 

[trip]

I think graduations are EXTREMELY boring and dont expect any relatives to attend them.

I agree!

 

[phorsenuf]

I didn't attend any of my (12) nieces/nephews graduation. Heck, we weren't even invited to the ceremony. I didn't invite them to my (4) kids either. I would never subject them to that. We had just 1 graduating indoors and it was miserable! It got so hot in there. I would've hated making them sit through that. If all my family had attended it would have been 24 people!
Now the party after the graduation, that's a different story. All the family attended those.

I can't imagine anyone getting upset because their sibling didn't attend.

 

[4nana]

MIGrandma, you know how Dis'ners love to take a tread and run pay no attention dear.

We can hardly answer for your DS or DGD, but I'm sure they realize she'd have to get a sitter, etc. plus she plans to attend graduation party. You're lucky to have unlimited seating, in our area HS students get limited amount of tickets, which for us are parents and grandparents.

Reminds me, years back our family flew out to Washington state for youngest DD college graduation and wedding following week. She had all of 3 tickets, one for her future DH and her parents . As graduation was televised, her 3 siblings and families stayed at her apt and watched her graduation. It was hassle free, no hurt feelings, and we all attended her dinner party that evening.

 

[HM]

I don't expect my siblings to come to the graduation of my son from HS in two weeks. It's during the day, they have jobs and families to tend to. Even if it was at night...I wouldn't expect them to come (they do live in town). I'm not even sure my own DD is going to attend. Boring and hot....

 

[kirbsam]

We never go to any of the actual ceremonies. Many times there is only seating for the immediate family. Some even give out tickets.

Why look for reasons to be offended. She sat at the saved table for the concert and she is going to the open house. What more is she suppose to do?

that was hilarious. two thumbs up.

 

[krcit]

My niece is graduating next month in my town. It never even crossed my mind to go to the ceremony and I hope they don't invite me I would not be offended at all if my brothers didn't attend my kids graduations.

 

[disykat]

I think graduations are EXTREMELY boring and dont expect any relatives to attend them.

I agree. My son graduates in a few weeks. I was actually shocked when I realized my sister expects to come! My dh's parents are unable to come so I do have a ticket for her. Otherwise I'd be scrambling. We get six tickets.

Years ago, I almost didn't get to go to my own brother's graduation because our grandparents came and each student only got 4 tickets. My sister was playing in the band and didn't need one. I ended up getting in up in overflow. It was pretty interesting since I was still just a kid and had never been to a graduation before.