If you don't...

[mrsklamc]

Have life insurance and a will please do it now...

My mom's DH died last week and people are seriously sickening.

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

 

[mrsklamc]

Thanks...I just want people to know...

He had assumed everything would be ok because they were married, and it's actually not a law in that state. The spouse only gets half.

Plus, just ridiculous things are happening. An EX-BIL showed up at the lawyer's office hoping he was going to get something....What the heck?

 

[wdwfan16]

I am sorry to hear about your loss.

Isn't is sad how the thought of money brings out the worst in people?

 

[cm8]

, hope that things get easier for your mom and your family.

 

[disneyluv4]

 

[mafibisha]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope somehow, things will get straightened out.

Thank you for this post, as it's a good reminder for all of us. I was just thinking we need to be sure that ALL our kids are included in our will!
Although a friend said most wills are written to say: ".... and subsequent children". Hope ours is, too!

Blessings to your family.

 

[quasar4legs]

So sorry for your loss

Thanks for the reminder for us all to get our affairs in order, it makes things so much easier for the family.
Hope things get resolved quickly.

 

[SamSam]

First, I am so sorry for your loss. Second, please, everyone, make your wishes known so those who wil be left behind don't have to deal with these kinds of situations. I know it's difficult, and at times feels like it's like tempting fate, but it's something that makes life so much easier for those left behind.

 

[MineMail]

OP: So sorry for your loss. Hope your mother isn't too stressed by the legal hassles.


Probate of a will is a PITA when the lawyer, the witnesses or the executor has passed away. If your will is old, or you know that one of those people are no longer accessible (retirement, moving, death), get a new will drawn up. You can keep everything the same, but having current people involved helps ease the paperwork later on.

If you are separated, get a new Health Care Proxy form as well. Otherwise, your spouse, even if you're not together, has the last word on your health care if you're seriously ill. If you've ever done a Proxy in the past, make sure that's who you trust with those decisions. Make sure others know the score and your wishes, so that they can be carried out properly.

Of course, laws vary by where you live. If you move, you might want to update your legal papers to ensure that they take your current state's laws into effect, such as the OP has described.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

OP, I'm sorry for your loss, and for your mom having to deal with the creeps in life.

minemail, I never knew that a dead lawyer was a problem. Ours passed a couple of years ago. We'll look into it. Thanks.

 

[prncess674]

It sounds like you are having issues with a lack of a will, not lack of life insurance. Whenever there are second marriages and children of those former marriages it gets very messy with the will.

Most wills state that if one partner dies before the other then the surviving spouse inherits the entire estate. Then the children of the deceased spouse get bupkis since the surviving spouse generally doesn't list the deceased spouses children of a former marriage as beneificiary upon their death.

 

[mrsklamc]

Yes! Part of the problem is the lawyer retired and his son says "I'll have to check the files to see if there's a will....and I don't have time to do that until tax season is over." Are you kidding me?

 

[mrsklamc]

It sounds like you are having issues with a lack of a will, not lack of life insurance.

No, but it would be a whole lot easier on my mom if there actually WAS some of the money everyone thinks there is. She'd gladly give them some of it just to be rid of them.

 

[prncess674]

No, but it would be a whole lot easier on my mom if there actually WAS some of the money everyone thinks there is. She'd gladly give them some of it just to be rid of them.

Well if there is nothing to divvy up, then it will sort itself out soon enough. The greedy will go away.

 

[DVCLiz]

Yes! Part of the problem is the lawyer retired and his son says "I'll have to check the files to see if there's a will....and I don't have time to do that until tax season is over." Are you kidding me?

I don't think that's unreasonable. It was a couple of weeks befiore we had a meeting scheduled with my parents' lawyers when they died and they all knew exactly where everything was. It IS the busiest time of the year - waiting a week doesn't seem too much to expect to me.

 

[eliza61]

Op, sorry for your loss.

Funerals and Weddings tend to bring out the absolute worse in families.

 

[mrsklamc]

I don't think that's unreasonable. It was a couple of weeks befiore we had a meeting scheduled with my parents' lawyers when they died and they all knew exactly where everything was. It IS the busiest time of the year - waiting a week doesn't seem too much to expect to me.

She's content to wait for an appointment, but I don't think it's unreasonable to expect a lawyer to have a filing system that enables him to determine within just a few minutes whether or not someone does, or does not, have a will. Maybe at a huge law firm, but the entire town only has 640 people.

Tax season or not, a decent human being should be able to take a few minutes to find that out for a woman whose husband was just murdered.

 

[mrsklamc]

Well if there is nothing to divvy up, then it will sort itself out soon enough. The greedy will go away.

The current issue is some land my mother's MIL sold to my mom and her DH-it is legally titled to my mom right now. A BIL says he bought it from MIL 12 years ago, so he expects my mother to 'do the Christian thing' and give it to him- despite the fact that she's paying a mortgage on it.

I told her to tell him that his issue is with his MIL, not my mom. And if you truly spent $9500 dollars on something and didn't get the title changed to you...you're an idiot anyway.

 

[gk90]

She's content to wait for an appointment, but I don't think it's unreasonable to expect a lawyer to have a filing system that enables him to determine within just a few minutes whether or not someone does, or does not, have a will. Maybe at a huge law firm, but the entire town only has 640 people.

Tax season or not, a decent human being should be able to take a few minutes to find that out for a woman whose husband was just murdered.

So sorry to hear about your mom's loss! I can't imagine what she's going through and what kind of shock that must have been. ITA, the lawyer should have been able to give her more than "it's tax season".

Also ITA that money and inheritances can bring out the worst in people. As for the BIL who "bought" the land, if he doesn't have a title or mortgage, too bad!

For anyone who doesn't have a will, it's really something everyone should have, and there are lots of free or low-cost ways to make one--look up "will form" on google and make sure that you follow the laws and guidelines for your particular state. DH and I made out wills the year after 9/11--we heard too many stories about victims whose families went through so much additional stress because they didn't have wills. His union subscribes to a legal plan that does low-cost wills.