If you book it, they will come....

[managirl]

So I stopped by to see my Mom today and she went to a family function this weekend. She told me that "the family" was talking about that i should change my wedding and have it home and i shouldn't get upset if people dont come. Especially with the economy the way it is. Did I make the wrong decision? Any one else fighting this battle? I could use some words of encouragement

 

[Donald'sGirl]

You did not make the wrong decision! It is your wedding and your dream to marry at Disney! They have over a year to save and plan to be with you on your wedding so the economy is no excuse! If they want to really be there, they will make it work.

Don't second guess yourself, you have to do what is in your heart and the only person that really matters is your DF. If he is there everything else will fall in to place!

 

[Tink_Kel]

I agree that you should follow your dream, and if you want to be a Disney Bride , then go for it! However, with the present economy, you need to be realistic, and be prepared if some cannot attend. Yes, they may have a whole year to save up for it, but right now a lot of people have to prioritize where their extra funds are going.

I think I'd get a feel for how many would attend. If it's a low number, maybe consider an escape wedding, and a looooonnnnnnggggg honeymoon.

 

[DisneyBrideToni]

I agree with everyone else and if its your dream you should do it. I will tell you that you would be surprised who pops up and wants to go. I started off with a 10 guest wedding. I was going to do an escape then just have a reception in New Jersey when we got back. Now I am doing a wishes wedding, with 40 guests with a reception, dessert party, the works. We are still doing the at home reception too for those that could not attend.

Also, another option you may consider, is something that we did that our family not attending is thrilled with. We have STVS Video and we are having them do a webcast of the ceremony live so that our family and friends in New Jersey can watch our ceremony while its happening in Florida. Just a thought but I wouldn't worry about the guests. Do what you are dreaming of or else you may regret it later. Its all about you and your DF!.

 

[lurkyloo]

This happened to me. First my brother (who was married 2 hours from the nearest airport in a remote corner of Maine) told me that our wedding was too far away and no one would come. Then he told me that he'd heard a bunch of our relatives talking and that too many of them (i.e., more than were invited) wanted to come!

You just kinda have to decide to be happy no matter how many people come (and in the end, most of us have had more than we expected) for all the reasons everyone's listed above.

 

[DWPromise]

Also, another option you may consider, is something that we did that our family not attending is thrilled with. We have STVS Video and we are having them do a webcast of the ceremony live so that our family and friends in New Jersey can watch our ceremony while its happening in Florida.

Toni - that is so cool!

We booked ours knowing some very close family members wouldn't be able to make it. Then, others started to back out when we sent the invites. It is a bummer not to have everyone coming, but I think they are probably more upset about it then we are. Not only are they missing our wedding, but they are missing a fun trip to Disney. We promised to bring back our video and lots of pictures. We are also having a party a month after we get home. On the flip side, there were a few people who surprised us with a "yes" response.

In the end, this was our dream and we realized how much we would regret it if we didn't just "take the plunge" so to speak. Whatever decision you make, it'll be the right one...either way, you'll still end up as husband and wife!

 

[managirl]

Thank you so much for all the encouraging words. I feel so much better. I know we made the right decision. As long as DF and I are happy that is what matters right? My mom has been against it from the start, so she may have provoked the conversation.

 

[Angela0917]

So I stopped by to see my Mom today and she went to a family function this weekend. She told me that "the family" was talking about that i should change my wedding and have it home and i shouldn't get upset if people dont come. Especially with the economy the way it is. Did I make the wrong decision? Any one else fighting this battle? I could use some words of encouragement

Hi managirl, I had the same problem as you, mostly with DF's family. They all said they didn't have the money to come, and/or they just didn't want to go to Florida (we're from Pittsburgh). Even though I really would have LOVED a Disney wedding, it was more important to me to have our familys there! So, we're going to Disney for our honeymoon, and I know I've made the right decision... instead of the Escape wedding with 18 people, we'll be able to share our day with around 200 of our closest friends and family! Also, I won't have to worry about family sticking around while we're on our honeymoon!

Do whatever feels right to you, and decide what's most important to you on your wedding day! Everything will work out!

 

[vikkymax]

after all its your wedding not your MOM's! well, dont listen to anybody...just listen to your heart and continue with your planning as these are the memories that you will cherish for the rest of your life!

 

[lastminutemom]

Your mom may have said it to provoke you, but the true impact of the slowing economy is just starting to be felt and you do have to be prepared that people you thought would come might not and you need to practice being understanding. Some people who want to be there simply might not be able to attend.

 

[Malefi_Stitch]

I've had the same experience with DF's family. They're against having to travel and us "planning people's vacations," which is complete nonsense because the only thing we're planning is the wedding. It's their choice whether people want to turn it into a vacation (which many actually are surprisingly). DF flat out told his grandfather that the people attending should WANT to be there, not feel obligated to be there. And if that's how they felt, they shouldn't bother coming.

This gives us the opportunity to be with the people we are closest to, not someone's uncle's cousin's nephew we haven't seen in 10 years and dont even remember. We're more interested in who we spend it with, not the number of presents we get...although prezzies are always graciously accepted.

If you've always wanted a Disney wedding, then it's YOUR wedding and as long as the two of you are happy, that's all that matters.

 

[bridetobe789]

The way we look at it is we all book our date either 12/8 months in advance so there is plenty of heads up to make plans/save! Our family is coming from ny so they have quite a bit of a trip down and no one has had a problem with it since they have so much heads up.! I think you need to stick with whats important to you and they should respect that ! Good luck!

 

[disneypolybride2008]

i agree with the other posters, it's YOUR wedding, and YOUR photographs, so choose the one you want. Personally i feel that the wedding is a commitment between you and your DF, not a family get together (of course if they can come that is a bonus), so we went with Disney and luckily some of my family booked far in advance and is able to make payments. For those unable to afford to go, we are likely going to get the webcast of our wedding which is REALLY neat! Good luck deciding.

 

[themagicofdisney]

The SAME thing happened to me! My Mom said almost those exact words too!!! I posted on here for some encouragement too...Let me tell you we sent out our announcements with an insert asking people to let us know if they were interested in coming. We estimated about 40-50 people would come. WELL...OUT OF 99 people 82 are interested in coming!!!

I really almost called off everything before I knew everyones feelings! I was so hurt by some of our families reactions...but NOW IM SO EXCITED...I wouldn't care if only 2 people came! Disney is the way to go!! GOOD LUCK!

 

[Sweetsus]

Managirl, I totally understand where you're coming from. My DF and I actually decided to go with a Disney Wedding BECAUSE of our families - mainly his. I have always said that I would be understanding especially as our families will be travelling from Ireland but some comments are so hurtful and its hard not to feel at a total loss. I have to say though, my family are somewhat converted to Disney and are more enthusiastic and I can only imagine how hurt you feel when a large portion of the negativity is coming from your mom. As it's only my mom and me, I know my world would fall apart if she had that attitude so I can imagine how its affecting you.

I'm gonna give you some of the advice that she has given me. With some people its just jealousy. You are doing something unique, you've found happiness and some people are just bitter with that and they need to deal with it. Hold your head up high. Its your wedding, your special day and no one should make you feel any different about it. Do what you and your DF feel is best. Don't change your plans just to keep everyone else happy. You don't want everyone else enjoying your wedding day and not you.

With regards to the economy - everyone is feeling it and I'm sure you, like I and everyone else here, is understanding of someone who's circumstances have taken a turn for the worst and may not be able to travel for a wedding. You could just do without the mean comments.

Anyway I wish you the best as I'm sure everyone else here does Good luck with the wedding planning

 

[laceemouse]

I've had the same experience with DF's family. They're against having to travel and us "planning people's vacations," which is complete nonsense because the only thing we're planning is the wedding. It's their choice whether people want to turn it into a vacation (which many actually are surprisingly). DF flat out told his grandfather that the people attending should WANT to be there, not feel obligated to be there. And if that's how they felt, they shouldn't bother coming.

This gives us the opportunity to be with the people we are closest to, not someone's uncle's cousin's nephew we haven't seen in 10 years and dont even remember. We're more interested in who we spend it with, not the number of presents we get...although prezzies are always graciously accepted.

If you've always wanted a Disney wedding, then it's YOUR wedding and as long as the two of you are happy, that's all that matters.

So, his own grandfather can't come? Sad.