I need your opinions on this please

[Sonya]

I don't want this to turn into a debate about breastfeeding vs bottlefeeding, or childless couples and "breeders" so please just stick to opinions.

OK, DS is a bottlefed baby for medical reasons. DH and I went to a sitdown restaurant (sushi! ) last night and DS got hungry. So DH whips out a bottle and starts feeding him at our table. I say to him, Do you think that's OK? Is it polite? After all, it isn't McD's. But DH says we should be able to feed DS anywhere. I know this is true, but for some reason it strikes me as rude. DS doesn't cry or burp loudly, if fact you might not even know he was eating if you couldn't see. But what if he were to spit up badly? Or burp like a trucker?

The funny thing is, if I were breastfeeding it wouldn't bother me at all! I've always respected a womans right to feed her baby anywhere as long as she was descrete.

So as a new mom, are there places we should not feed our babies in public, not because we don't have a right, but because it is bad manners?

 

[lil mermaid]

Sonya,

I am not a mom (yet anyway) but I don't see any reason why you can't feed your little baby whenever you need to. If he is hungry, he is hungry, there isn't much else you can do about it other than feed him. Better than letting him scream, right?

I hope that you guys enjoyed your sushi last night!

 

[jel0511]

No, you should feed your baby where ever you feel you need to. Regardless of whether they are bottlefed or breastfed. Both of my children were bottlefed, by choice mind you, and I always fed them when we went out for dinner. They got their bottles while we were waiting for our main courses to arrive. This way, we could feed them while waiting, and the baby would be fed and full, so we could enjoy our meal without a crying, hungry baby. Now, I wouldn't feed my children on a crowded bus, but I never was on a crowded bus. If you're at your own table, in your own private space, then I don't think there is any problem with it.

 

[jamsmom]

I might be strange, but I do not care where I am.,.,...if a baby is hungry, I would rather soemone feed him no matter how than to hear the baby cry because he is hungry.

Granted, if the baby is breastfed, I think there are tactful ways to do that in public if necessary.

 

[dtuleya]

I agree with the others, feed your DS when and wherever he is hungry. (sigh) I miss those days. My "babies" are 14, 6', and 9, 5'. Luckily they'll still tolerate mom snuggling with them.

 

[binny]

babies get hungry too! You want to eat when yore hungry so does your baby!

Feed away


BTW I know a lot of adults with a lot worse manners than a baby belching

I also agree with the breastfeeding being discreet.

 

[Dan Murphy]

Hi Sonya. Don't think in all the years here on the DIS I've ever commented on one of these threads (kid feeding) but this one seems so easy.

Yep, feed the kid anywhere, anytime he/she is hungry or the time 'is correct'. Bottle, anywhere, anytime; breast, same, but as you said, discretely, for societal reasons.

BTW, how is little Sam doing??

 

[Sonya]

I was thinking that DH should have fed DS in the waiting area or somewhere else, not the bathroom, but NOT let him scream.

 

[MosMom]

I don't care where I am, babies have a right to eat too! I've always tried to hold the baby back away from the table and not plop them up there while I hold the bottle but I've never had any comments, dirty looks, etc. The only looks we ever receive (breast or bottle feeding because I've done both) have been smiles and "Ohhh look at the baby" looks. I mean, what kind of person scowls at an innocent baby eating? Even if I did have someone give me a dirty look or say something nasty I would have to wonder how sad their lives are to be annoyed by a baby eating!! It is a pretty quiet unobtrusive activity! It can get pretty loud though if you DON'T feed them so if I were childless in a restaurant I would say "Bring on the bottle!" rather than the alternative of a screaming hungry baby!

 

[Michelle]

Another one who agrees with DH. It's perfectly FINE to feed your son in public, ANYWHERE. I'm sure most people would rather be around a happy, full little guy than a hungry, fussy one.

And if he spits up or burps no one will look twice...he's a baby, that's his job.

 

[aahmom1]

Of course you can feed your baby anywhere. I'm curious about something though. Was this a very nice restaurant? If it was, and you felt uncomfortable feeding your baby there, I have to wonder if it was an appropriate place to take a baby in the first place.

In all my years of being a Mother, I have never taken my kids anywhere I would feel uncomfortable feeding them a bottle, assuming I would feel out of place feeding them, then I would feel out of place taking them there.

This is not a dig at you, I'm just curious.

 

[SonjaB]

Feed that little fella. It's never rude to take care of your child's needs and it would be darned rude to HIM to eat in front of him when he's hungry.

 

[becka]

I have to agree with everyone else. If it was a suitable enough place to take him to in the first place then it is a suitable enough place for him to eat.

 

[Tiiiigergirl]

Feeding your son is perfectly fine. I mean he's hungry and it's dinner time. Makes sense to me.

No the woman who finished her meal and then changed her child's diaper on the table.......eewwww!

 

[Jenn Lynn]

Definitely feed him where ever/when ever he is hungry.

I BF DD in public and would not even think twice about giving a bottle in public. No need to go any where else. Right where you are is perfectly fine.

 

[KathyTX]

Sounds like Sam doing great these days!

What more appropriate place to feed the baby than at a restaurant? But it sounds like you weren't worried as much about the feeding as about some of the less pleasant activities that surround it... I doubt anyone would have noticed a little after-dinner belch. And I think only a baby-hater would be able to be offended by even a really loud one.

The spit-up potential is a bit more sensitive... I'd really rather not see that at dinner. It's normal for very little ones to spit up a teeny bit after a meal, and that can be handled very discreetly with a small bib or cloth so as not to be noticed by anyone else. But if the baby has reflux problems that typically lead to more copious and noticeable after dinner messes, I agree that a bit of discretion would be appreciated by your fellow diners.

Just wait until he's around one, and insisting on feeding himself. Carrots smushed up his nose, more food on the floor than in his mouth, sticky, slimy hands- THAT'S when it becomes really interesting to go to restaurants with them! (We used to base the amount we tipped on the mess that DS made. ) Thank goodness he's a fairly mannerly 10 year old now.

 

[Sonya]

Thanks everyone. Dan, he's doing great, just turned 3 months and is 13 pounds! He's a little chubber, much different from the skinny little baby we brought home.

aahmom1, it was a nice family restaurant that we have been to many times before, all the waitresses know us and loved seeing our DS. However it was Saturday night and there were several couples on dates there and I felt they wanted a more grown-up atmosphere.

KathyTX, this is exactly what I was wondering about. I'm worried that he might spit up and someone would see and be grossed out. I figured that while he was learning solid foods that we would only take him to family restaurants that you are used to seeing kids make messes of themselves.

 

[Desnik]

My son is bottlefed and now has started baby food. I feed him anywhere and everywhere! He's a baby and if he's hungry, I'll feed him. I have never gotten bad looks or comments. And, I didn't care. Now if he was really fussy and crying loudly I would take him outside or to the car to calm him. Luckily that's never happened, he hardly ever cries! He's been to too many restaurants to count!! We eat out , alot

 

[Porter]

Sonya, you are responsible for a life which of course includes feeding the little one. Never question if it is rude or not to be feeding your infant at a restaurant. If the guest become annoyed or think that it is rude to do so then they are the type of people you really do not need in your life anyways. So what if your child burps or spits up? Are you trying to tell me that you were never in a restaurant when a certain ‘sound’ or a foul odor (and I am not talking about Garlic) came from another table where there were only adults! Adults burp and pass those famous gasses in public, you can feed your child. Now changing your child on the middle of the dinner table would be another story.

 

[~Sparkly~Zoe]

Well he is entitled to eat too. He does get hungry does he not?
So what if he burps, thats normal for a baby.