I need advice in regards to a wedding I've been invited to

[RockAndRollBallerina]

Here's the nutshell version of this story. My aunt is getting married in May 2011 one day after my birthday. Needless to say this is her second marriage and I was there for her first wedding.

Unfortunately I have already spent money on a plane ticket to go back and pay my parents a visit in late February, and have one purchased to visit again in the summer, and I am saving for my plane ticket to Orlando, FL for my 2011 Disney trip with my mom, sister, and cousin. So basically I have no way of getting myself there for the wedding.

I am 8.5 hours drive away from where the wedding will be but I have major anxiety problems when it comes to driving, and I will only drive within half hour of home. So that is out of the question as well.

What is the polite way to decline an RSVP to a wedding in this case?

 

[DeluxePrincess]

I think, "Sorry, I am unable to travel to your wedding" would do just fine. I think your reasons are understandable. If you speak to your Aunt, you can go into details.

 

[TheIncredibles!]

I would just send back the RSVP declining and add a small note to your Aunt indicating that while you'd love to celebrate with her, your current plans and finances will not allow another trip out to her area. Then make sure you send her a card for the wedding congratulating her and wishing her well.

If she has an issue with any of that then that is her problem.

 

[dizluvah]

I would send a congratulations card (on their engagement or setting the wedding date) with a nice note explaining I am disappointed I won't be able to attend - then I'd send a wedding gift closer to the event.

I don't think an explanation is needed - if you are particularly close to the bride to be then you could call her and give her all the personal info about your budget constraints but I think I'd just rsvp with regrets.

 

[momof1princess]

I would just send back the RSVP declining and add a small note to your Aunt indicating that while you'd love to celebrate with her, your current plans and finances will not allow another trip out to her area. Then make sure you send her a card for the wedding congratulating her and wishing her well.

If she has an issue with any of that then that is her problem.

MTE

 

[WDSearcher]

You simply RSVP your regrets and then send a card / gift / whatever closer to the date of the wedding. You don't have to explain to her about other flights, driving anxiety, or anything. You can't make her wedding and you're sorry.

 

[RockAndRollBallerina]

Thank you so much for the responses, they are extremely helpful.

 

[Rora]

You simply RSVP your regrets and then send a card / gift / whatever closer to the date of the wedding. You don't have to explain to her about other flights, driving anxiety, or anything. You can't make her wedding and you're sorry.

Exactly.

 

[tlbwriter]

Here's the nutshell version of this story. My aunt is getting married in May 2011 one day after my birthday. Needless to say this is her second marriage and I was there for her first wedding.

I'm not sure why that was needless to say. I mean, I had no idea.

Anyway, the polite way is to return the RSVP card (if included) with a no, and then either call/write her, or add a note saying you're sorry you can't attend and you wish her all the best, send a nice card and maybe a gift. You may want to tell her why, but this usually isn't in your best interest, because if there happens to be a pushy person (maybe the happy bride, maybe another relative) involved, it just gives them something to argue against.