I need a variety of opinions

[bekkiz]

I am really not normal when it comes to getting social "cues" in the sense of I ALWAYS assume someone is going to to be offended at something I (or a family member etc) do or say. It's empathy gone totally over the deep end. I'm weird, I know, but I get that I'm weird.

So, I'm in a little disagreement with my husband over something, and I want to see if it's just my crazy acting up, or if I should feel weird about this.

My husband is an amatur photographer who mostly does it as a hobby, but has occasionally been asked to shoot for events and been paid. For example, I coached a team, and he took pictures of the final tournament. Parents could purchase the high-res versions or simply copy and paste a smaller verson (watermarked) off his website. Totally fine with this, a lot of parents bought pictures everyone was happy.

We have a small moms group that has 9 people in it, and we recently had a picnic w/ all the dads and babies. DH took pictures of the babies, and got some really cute shots. He put them up on his website (password protected, before anyone freaks out) and thought he would do the same kind of deal. Parents could save a watermarked copy or buy the high-res version.

I feel SO weird about this. None of the moms/dads asked us to take pictures and they're my friends. And I sort of feel like, I don't know, a salesperson, if I send them the link/password for the pics. BUT, I know that I always read way to much into things and just assume that people will take things the wrong way. Would you be OK with this if you were in my playgroup, or is it weird?

Update: Thank you for your thoughts. I think DH came to the same conclusion after a little thinking on his own. I'm glad to see I wasn't being overly worried, as is my habit sometimes. I understand where he was coming from, in the sense that it does take quite a bit of time to work on the pictures to make them right, but that was his choice, and he wasn't asked, so we'll be simply passing along the pics. Thanks again!

 

[Miz Diz]

I voted I wouldn't exclude you from the group.

I do think it is a little inappropriate to ask people to buy the photos considering he was not asked and it is more his hobby. But they do have the option to refuse.

If I were one of the parents, I probably would be a little put off with it and not purchase any photos, but I wouldn't let it affect my relationship with you as long as you were not pushy about purchasing photos.

Seems like it was a friendly gathering. If I were the photographer, I would be happy to share electronic copies with friends, free of charge and they could print their own out - but that's just me.

 

[Jordans_Mommie]

I wouldn't be offended, but I would think it was weird.

By the way, your babies are gorgeous!

 

[Buckalew11]

I'm not sure. I think you are almost right to question yourself.

 

[diznygirl]

Yeah, it's a little weird. It almost seems like hubby is using your friends to make some money. I agree that if he got some cute shots you could share them in an email. For free. The way friends do.

 

[ginna74]

hmmm if he was taking pics of my kids without my permission I probably would be asking what he plans on doing with the pics and then ..... If I wasn't interested I probably would tell him to stop. Wouldn't get upset but would feel pretty funny about it all. BUT if he was a good friend.....then that would be different. Just the fact that someone I don't know/ barely know is taking pics, yeh I would feel funny.

 

[LuvOrlando]

My 2 cents: I wouldn't even mention the alternative. If someone wants the pictures in a special way he/she will ask and then its fine to say how much for what. Saying it up front might make some people feel obligated because your DH did do all this to be nice and they will pay to be nice. Then after they go along with things they will be resentful because of the sings attached.. Not a good mix for friendships.

 

[SDFgirl]

I would also think it was a bit strange...like going to a party with friends and charging for the photos you took. However, I wouldn't find it so strange that I'd be offended or creeped out.

 

[BuffettFan]

I voted that its a little weird.

Asking your friends (which I assume is what your playgroup is made up of) to pay for pictures is weird.
I've coached teams before, and we have often had professional photographers come out to tourneys. We post the pics on our team website, and parents can make purchases, but they're not really our friends (well, some are) and my hubby isn't profitting from it. I would feel totaly different if it were at a playgroup picnic.

 

[robinb]

I think that offering the photos for sale is pretty rude. I wouldn't mind him taking photos and sharing them, but it's really strange for him to try to make money from the other parents without being asked to play the role of photographer. If he was asked in advance to take photos (like for your team) that is a different matter.

So ... I think he should look at this as an offer of goodwill and give the high-res photos to people who request them THIS TIME (making a note that it is a special circumstance) and the next time he takes photos for the group set the ground rules of paying for the high-res versions in advance.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I would not be happy with him taking photos of my child and posting them on any website. Password protected or not. Sorry but unless I knew about it ahead of time and could decide if I was okay with it I would be very angry.

 

[Cindy B]

Here's a compromise: He can pass them along if needed, but he could ask if any of the parents wouldn't mind if any of the pictures would up in a portfolio. I 've had the happen with me in a similar circumstance.. the pictures were free, but the photographer asked if the photos (with no names attached) could be a part of his portfolio. I didn't mind so I gave permission.

 

[Disney Doll]

Use them as a marketing tool. Give the photos to the parents for free along with a flyer/business card/pamphlet saying that if they like his work, could they remember him when someone needs a photographer for an "event".

Basically he's giving them a sample of his work (which just happens to be their child ) and the information they need to get in touch with him for a business venture in the future if they so choose.

 

[jrmasm]

I think its weird. And as a parent of a child on the team that you coach, I would not have appreciated the tournament picture deal either.

I wouldn't exclude you but I would wonder what the heck you were thinking.

 

[sbell111]

Professional photographer sells his work. News at eleven.

 

[Took]

I would not be happy with him taking photos of my child and posting them on any website. Password protected or not. Sorry but unless I knew about it ahead of time and could decide if I was okay with it I would be very angry.

Ditto. Be sure to get permission before posting children's pictures.