I"m clueless as to what to do! (Bad kid problem)

[blowinbubbles]

Here's the situation: We used to live in this area about three years ago. My oldest was in third grade at the time. There was this boy who was a year older, and he and my son were somewhat friends. This kid lived at least a mile down the road--a busy, two-laned county road--and his parents, would let him ride his bike over here. So, he came over a couple of times, and then one day I noticed that this kid had turned on the tv show "Blind Date." Then I found out that he told my 3rd grade son several very sexually suggestive things that no 3rd grader had business knowing. Turns out that Bad Kid had a 17 y/o brother from whom he learned all this bad stuff. At the time I didn't know how to handle this, but since we were moving away within a few weeks I let it slide.

Fast forward, we just moved back in this area. My son is in 6th grade and Bad Kid is in 7th grade. Bad Kid spotted my son on the bus and wants to start hanging out~! My son told him that he didn't want him to come over, but Bad Kid doesn't listen, so as I type, Bad Kid is riding around my yard on his minibike with my younger son!

What would you do in this situation? I really think he is a bad influence and has *no* supervision, but I really don't want to hurt his feelings. Do I tell him that I think it's best that he not come around? Call his parents? Now I'm remembering how glad I was to be moving away, so I wouldn't have to deal with this!

I really appreciate anyone's input on this. There are so many smart folks on this board, and I really value y'alls opinions!

 

[MAKmom]

Smother him, stay in the room, go out back be a real pain in the neck. Talk to him & ask alot of questions, drive him crazy. You may find out he is a great kid,since it's been 3 years. If he's still a bad influence he will go away if you cramp his style. Don't feed him until you decide if you want him to stay around.

 

[disykat]

Smother him, stay in the room, go out back be a real pain in the neck. Talk to him & ask alot of questions, drive him crazy. You may find out he is a great kid,since it's been 3 years. If he's still a bad influence he will go away if you cramp his style. Don't feed him until you decide if you want him to stay around.

That's great advice! If he's a kid who is craving (or needs) a positive adult role model - there you'll be. If he really wants to do negative stuff, he won't hang around long - but he'll still have had the positive experience of your interest in him.

 

[wilderness01]

That is great advice. "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." See what he will be to your son. We had a very similar situation and for us it was best if the older child stayed away from our child. Teaching our child and the other neighbor kids all kinds of advanced things that were not necessary. It turned out to be a big pain but it was the best thing we did, to nip it in the bud so quick. You'll get your answers soon as long as you have your finger on the pulse so to speak. Good luck.

 

[CathrynRose]

I *highly* reccomend NOT using the term "bad kid" round these parts...

 

[CJMickeyMouse]

He's not your responsibility. Send him home. For me all it would take is the minibike in my yard. If your son does not want him there... then he goes home. Period. My kids' friends are welcome here anytime, but kids are NOT to invite themselves here. I know, I know... .MEANIE!!!!!

 

[Southern4sure]

I *highly* reccomend NOT using the term "bad kid" round these parts...

I couldnt help but laugh when I read this....cold Diet Coke going through your nostrils hurt!

 

[blowinbubbles]

LOL about not saying "Bad Kid!"

I agree with the "keeping your enemies closer" idea. That's how I would usually handle something like this, although this situation is much worse.

Actually, right after I typed the original message, the phone rang. It was one of the moms on the other side of the neighborhood. (We met briefly a few years ago.) Anyway, she told me that my son and Bad Kid were both racing down the road, BK on his minibike and my son in his go-cart. LMAO, I guess my kid is Bad Kid, too!

Anyway, she told me that this kid has been banned from several houses in the neighborhood and has had the police called on him a few times. In other words, he's a real troublemaker. So this gets me off the hook, so to speak. Now I don't have to feel bad about not letting him come around!

And another bonus to all this is that after I told my h about what happened, he finally told the kids that the go-cart was not to leave the yard. I had told him just yesterday that a nine year-old boy has no business riding a go-cart on the street. He could get hurt or killed, or hurt someone else. There's a reason that kids can't drive until their 16! So now I have him behind me on this one. . . definitely a load off my mind!

Thanks a bunch, everyone, for your help!

 

[kbkids]

Wish you all the best! I think the advice you were given is good. And I just wanted to say welcome home from another Pensacola gal!

 

[MAKmom]

GOcarts are so dangerous DH had a friend who was decapitated riding one. He calls them Death Traps.

 

[blowinbubbles]

Wish you all the best! I think the advice you were given is good. And I just wanted to say welcome home from another Pensacola gal!

Thank you!!! LOL, it's good to be back where I can actually find low-fat groceries!

 

[blowinbubbles]

GOcarts are so dangerous DH had a friend who was decapitated riding one. He calls them Death Traps.

OMG, that is *so* what I didn't need to hear! I didn't know they were so dangerous. I know my h was wanting to get them four-wheelers (A big He** no from me!) and then dirt bikes. I figured that a go-cart was the least of all evils. At least it has a roll cage on it.

Ugh, now I won't get to sleep tonight! But thanks for the warning. . I"ll have to do some research, pronto.