I have a stalker

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

An ex - friend appears to be stalking me!

She was once close to me - she gave me my first real job for goodness' sake. But then she ripped my dad off to the tune of thousands of pounds - and I can't forgive that. Although I would hope that in time I could forgive her for that.

Anywho.

She has started to ping me on Facebook. Somehow she has twigged we are moving house. Not too untoward there admittedly, but she never knew where we lived - so how does she know now? And how does she know we're moving? It's not obvious.

Now she knows I am selling classic games consoles and extras... again, could be innocuous, but it's a bit of a reach.

So how does she know all this stuff about me? I'm stumped. It could be as I said a perfectly innocent explanation, just unlikely.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Yikes!

 

[fla4fun]

An ex - friend appears to be stalking me!

She was once close to me - she gave me my first real job for goodness' sake. But then she ripped my dad off to the tune of thousands of pounds - and I can't forgive that. Although I would hope that in time I could forgive her for that.

Anywho.

She has started to ping me on Facebook. Somehow she has twigged we are moving house. Not too untoward there admittedly, but she never knew where we lived - so how does she know now? And how does she know we're moving? It's not obvious.

Now she knows I am selling classic games consoles and extras... again, could be innocuous, but it's a bit of a reach.

So how does she know all this stuff about me? I'm stumped. It could be as I said a perfectly innocent explanation, just unlikely.

Did/do you have any mutual friends? If you haven’t posted about this on public social media, then I would assume she has spoken with someone who is currently acquainted with you.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

Did/do you have any mutual friends? If you haven’t posted about this on public social media, then I would assume she has spoken with someone who is currently acquainted with you.

No-one who could make a connection. We were mutual friends with a co-worker, Linda (who is lovely) and of course, my Dad, but as you've probably guessed, she and my Dad aren't on speaking terms and Linda isn't privy to any of this information...

 

[robinb]

An ex - friend appears to be stalking me!

She was once close to me - she gave me my first real job for goodness' sake. But then she ripped my dad off to the tune of thousands of pounds - and I can't forgive that. Although I would hope that in time I could forgive her for that.

Anywho.

She has started to ping me on Facebook. Somehow she has twigged we are moving house. Not too untoward there admittedly, but she never knew where we lived - so how does she know now? And how does she know we're moving? It's not obvious.

Now she knows I am selling classic games consoles and extras... again, could be innocuous, but it's a bit of a reach.

So how does she know all this stuff about me? I'm stumped. It could be as I said a perfectly innocent explanation, just unlikely.

Are you selling the stuff on FB? Have you been talking about it? Is your FB profile public? Do you have mutual friends? On FB or IRL? Could they be telling her these things?

First of all, block her on FB. Secondly, make sure your FB privacy is locked down. Third, reach out to mutual friends and tell them that you do not want to have contact with her. Tell them that you don't think they've said anything but you would appreciate that they not share things with her in the future.

I would never be able to forgive someone who stole thousands from my family, but I hold a grudge that way.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

Are you selling the stuff on FB? Have you been talking about it? Is your FB profile public? Do you have mutual friends? On FB or IRL? Could they be telling her these things?

First of all, block her on FB. Secondly, make sure your FB privacy is locked down. Third, reach out to mutual friends and tell them that you do not want to have contact with her. Tell them that you don't think they've said anything but you would appreciate that they not share things with her in the future.

I would never be able to forgive someone who stole thousands from my family, but I hold a grudge that way.

I have an independent site, my address and name are not on it. No real independent friends, bar for one who isn't privy to this information.

I have blocked her on Facebook. Rather worryingly, she appeared last night on WhatsApp. Weird. Not even my own brother knows I'm on WhatsApp!

 

[lilsonicfan]

If you are selling stuff on Facebook Marketplace, those listings are all public, and often turn up in friends' news feeds too. And if she had your number and she used Whatsapp, Whatsapp lets you look at all your contacts that are using it.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

If you are selling stuff on Facebook Marketplace, those listings are all public, and often turn up in friends' news feeds too. And if she had your number and she used Whatsapp, Whatsapp lets you look at all your contacts that are using it.

That's the weird part. She never had my current mobile number and I NEVER sell on Facebook Marketplace (too many con artists).

 

[fla4fun]

That's the weird part. She never had my current mobile number and I NEVER sell on Facebook Marketplace (too many con artists).

There are a lot of mobile phone directories online. I don’t know how you get included on or excluded from them, but it’s possible she might have located you that way. It’s scary how much data is available for free online.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

There are a lot of mobile phone directories online. I don’t know how you get included on or excluded from them, but it’s possible she might have located you that way. It’s scary how much data is available for free online.

You can do that?! Eeek!

 

[barkley]

it's pretty easy to find out ALLOT about anyone online despite their best efforts for privacy. as an example-dh recently mentioned an old friend we had'nt seen or heard of in over 30 years and i remarked that i bet i could find information on him. dh was doubtful b/c we did'nt know where he lived or could even remember his last name (he had bounced between his bio and stepdad's last name but we could'nt recall either). i remembered a small detail about a relative of his and put in her name along with a buisness she had been associated with in the '90's and up came an old newspaper article with her first and last name. entered it as a google search and came up one of those free sites that lists what city people live in AND relative names-up pops the friends first and last name. did a search on him to no avail but then i started searching the other relative names and found a facebook page that had the friend's wife listed as a friend. her facebook page provided enough posts about her dh (my dh's old friend) that i figured out where they lived, where he's worked for several years, what their activities are....took all of about 10 minutes. obituaries are a wealth of information as well-if you have a family member who has passed and they had an obit in the paper it likely lists your name/spouse or partner's name/any children's names/their spouse's name....you might have a privacy setting on facebook but often your children, extended family or friends do NOT and if they've sent you birthday greetings, posted photos, commented on your buisness...it's all there for the reading.

 

[mousefan73]

I have an independent site, my address and name are not on it. No real independent friends, bar for one who isn't privy to this information.

I have blocked her on Facebook. Rather worryingly, she appeared last night on WhatsApp. Weird. Not even my own brother knows I'm on WhatsApp!

WhatsApp it’s not really a social media platform, but more a service. You don’t create a profile to use it you just need cell numbers If she has your cell number she can send you a message via WhatsApp.

 

[mousefan73]

I think nowadays, there’s more about our lives online that we know which is kind of scary. I actually saw some news report where they had people volunteer to basically let a journalist find out all they can about them just based on their online presence. Just by searching online they found out so much personal information, lifestyle, daily activities, and it was actually scary to know what you can find out about a person.

For example, if you like a place or check into a place or give a review that stays online, some random person can find out hate this person was there then

 

[ronandannette]

An ex - friend appears to be stalking me!

...She has started to ping me on Facebook. Somehow she has twigged we are moving house. Not too untoward there admittedly, but she never knew where we lived - so how does she know now? And how does she know we're moving? It's not obvious.

Now she knows I am selling classic games consoles and extras... again, could be innocuous, but it's a bit of a reach.

So how does she know all this stuff about me? I'm stumped. It could be as I said a perfectly innocent explanation, just unlikely.

Not to be flippant, but any "stalker" worth their salt has probably found your social media profiles - including this one. You've mentioned selling the house and moving, here on the CB, several times. And you frequently talk about all the items you buy/sell.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

Not to be flippant, but any "stalker" worth their salt has probably found your social media profiles - including this one. You've mentioned selling the house and moving, here on the CB, several times. And you frequently talk about all the items you buy/sell.

Yes, but do you know who I ACTUALLY am? Do you know my address? Which Church I attend? The names of my siblings? Where I went to school?

 

[ronandannette]

Yes, but do you know who I ACTUALLY am? Do you know my address? Which Church I attend? The names of my siblings? Where I went to school?

Not at all, but if somebody who knows you IRL is specifically poking into your on-line activity, I'd imagine they do. You mentioned your stalker being someone who is quite well acquainted with you and your family; why are you puzzled that they know those fairly basic things?

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Yes, but do you know who I ACTUALLY am? Do you know my address? Which Church I attend? The names of my siblings? Where I went to school?

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

View attachment 786407

LOL!

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

Not at all, but if somebody who knows you IRL is specifically poking into your on-line activity, I'd imagine they do. You mentioned your stalker being someone who is quite well acquainted with you and your family; why are you puzzled that they know those fairly basic things?

The curious thing is that they have gone out of their way to look into intimate details of my life. You don't normally watch someone's house in case it comes onto the market, you don't automatically trace the ownership of an anonymous shop online, you just don't follow someone to this degree. You CAN keep note of someone's activities, it's just not normal to though on this measure. THAT'S what worries me. Don't worry though - they have been blocked across the board politely.

Suitability - Just because you CAN, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

 

[china mom]

The curious thing is that they have gone out of their way to look into intimate details of my life. You don't normally watch someone's house in case it comes onto the market, you don't automatically trace the ownership of an anonymous shop online, you just don't follow someone to this degree. You CAN keep note of someone's activities, it's just not normal to though on this measure. THAT'S what worries me. Don't worry though - they have been blocked across the board politely.

Suitability - Just because you CAN, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

I kinda do. I am weird like that but data mining is a fun hobby for me. But, I know I am not normal. I just enjoy the challenge.

Look yourself up in
Fastpeopleserch.com
zabaserch.com
truthfinder.com

You will likely find your cell phone on there. as well as you past and current addresses. You can look the house up in your jurisdictions tax records and see when you purchased and for how much. You can run the address in realtor or Zillow and see pictures of the house even if it is non currently on the market.

Google Earth.

Court records

You can run the relatives you found on the above sits through FB and find someone who knows you and who hasn't locked down their account.