I feel like I'm going crazy (sorry, long)

[Mercy]

Ok, I have posted before that my mom has cancer that has spread to her brain Anyway, she has responded well to her treatments, (tumors shrinking, going away, even though ultimately it is terminal) but because she does have a tumor in the part of her brain that affects her judgements, she can no longer be left alone.

About a month ago she wandered outside on her own and fell, thus determining her needing 24 hour care. For the past month I have been working non-stop trying to get her set up in an assisted living facility. She has been in a nursing home since she fell for rehab. I have found an asst. living facility I really like and feel would be good for her.

But it just feels like I keep running into all these roadblocks. The main one is, because she has a portacath where she gets her chemo treatments, the facility she is going to needs to be approved by the State to make sure they can meet her needs. Ok, this is taking FOREVER!! (the state is all backlogged, etc.) and I can't move her until we get that stupid paper signed by the state. The worse part is, I HATE the nursing home she is in now and just WANT TO GET HER OUT OF THERE!! But I just keep thinking, ok, only another day or so, which is turning into another WEEK or so!!

I am just so FRUSTRATED! Everyday I call to see what progress is being made, and everyday I go to see her at the nursing home so I can check up on her and the care she is receiving (or NOT receiving). Anyway, I am so tired, frustrated, depressed, you name it!!!

Thanks for listening, I know this was long. Please pray that this all gets resolved early next week before I totally LOSE MY MIND!!

 

[Otimon]

You are in my prayers .

Do you have other family near that can help share the burden with you? Or a friend willing to listen when you need to talk?

Things with the State can move slowly, as you know, but stay focused on the fact that the change WILL come. In the meantime, let your friends and family help you. Let them know what YOU need to help you through this most difficult time.

God bless.

 

[Cinderellafifi]

I know how difficult it is to try to deal with dying family members. I cannot imagine how frustrating it is to deal with the State on top of it all.

Stay strong. You CAN and WILL get through this. Your mom is lucky to have such a devoted child.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

 

[BWVDenise]

 

[pw2pp]

Mercy:
((( Hugs ))) to you
I had to make decisions for my dad a few years ago. I know this is SO hard. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Mercy]

Thank you guys for listening and for your well wishes. Just talking about it helps. I do have a very good support system, my DH has been wonderful, my friends, church family and of course you guys Thanks, you all are great!

 

[Disney Doll]

Is anyone at the assisted living facility going to have to do anytihng with the portacath??? If not, I am not sure why it is an issue for them?

 

[Mercy]

Originally posted by Disney Doll
Is anyone at the assisted living facility going to have to do anytihng with the portacath??? If not, I am not sure why it is an issue for them?

No, they shouldn't, but if for some reason they would have to do something with it, flush it out, etc. (I'm not a nurse or anything so I really don't know about these things) the State needs to know there is someone there that could handle this. The facility has assured me that they have the necessary staff to take care of this, but the State just needs to sign off on it.

 

[Gramto6inPa]

{{{HUGS}}} to you!

 

[nativetxn]

{{{HUGS}}} sweetie. I'm sorry that you are experiencing all of this frustration.

My mother has stomach cancer and is too ill to be at home with me. It has not spread but she is just too ill to be at home yet. She is in a nursing home. I'm very pleased with her facility, so we are very lucky.

I know how you are feeling, though. My mother couldn't go into this nursing home because of the parental feeding through the portacath. They had to give her a feeding tube that has been nothing but trouble for her.

I hope you get everything sorted out soon and that you can place your mother in a facility in which you have trust and which she likes.

Katholyn

 

[wickey's friend]

Mercy -- prayers your for your mom for well-being, and for you to get through all the roadblocks.

 

[6_Time_Momma]

Sorry you're going through this.