I feel bad

[roscoepc1]

From a Middle school teacher's perspective, I would be appalled if a parent asked me for a week's worth of work ahead of time. Also, with all the time we get out of school each year, I would also be appalled if they missed a week of school. The reason I say this about the work is, it is a HUGE inconvenience to get make-up work ahead of time together. What we might do from day to day could change depending on what teachable moments come up in the classroom. Also, I may not have everything ready for the upcoming week bc I don't always have a planning period to get ahead that much.

The reason it would appall me, is because I am a middle school teacher. Things are way different in middle school than in elementary school. Also, I can see missing a day or two, but a whole week?

I understand that people want to avoid crowds, and go when it is cheaper, but, I don't think that is always what is best for the child. I just don't think it always sends the best message to the kids. It isn't about the work, or the grades, or their ability to catch up. In the big scheme of "life" no it probably will not matter that they missed a week of school, however it is a life lesson that is being taught. Sort of "the rules don't apply to me type of thing."

Ok, I am prepared to be flamed for this!

Sorry, I am sure this is not what people want to hear....

Just as an aside...it is sometimes about "the only way it will ever happen", not just choice...we could NEVER afford to be able to go during peak season...I almost pass out just SEEING the dollar amounts! It can also be about health. I'd end up in the hospital if we went during the summer....

As I said in another answer...our family found out the hard way that life is too short (we lost a son, our girls lost their brother), and so it's not about "the rules don't apply to us" but- "the rules DO apply, so you'll have to make it up, but it'll be worth it!"

 

[roscoepc1]

I always find these discussions so interesting as schools can be sooo different.

We went in December..............3 kids in school (Kindergarten, 2nd and 4th). No one (teachers/administrators) so much as peeped about it (except to say "have a great trip"). No one (my kids) had homework to do while they were on vacation. No one (my kids) had any work to make-up when they returned. They were gone 9 days and missed 7 days of school. There were no problems getting right back into the swing of things; no problems 'catching up'.

I just feel so badly listening to all you parents who have to jump through such mega hoops. I honestly don't know what I'd do if our school system was so controlling. As a middle-aged adult I prefer to make my own decisions regarding what is right for my family.

Sorry................I know that wasn't helpful. Just got me thinking

I feel the same way! And our teachers sent a tiny bit they could do on the plane, but otherwise gave them two weeks to catch up afterwards.

Just don't expect this when they get to middle school - usually a whole different ballgame!

We don't have "middle school"...the teachers here have the same "Have a great time" reaction for those grades (assuming you mean Gr 6-10?), and are happy to help them make it up afterwards...we have VERY tough academic standards too...

 

[roscoepc1]

You make a really interesting point. Sometimes it's not even the dreams and desires of the students but the dreams and desires of the parents. Not every kid is Ivy League material. DH graduated from an Ivy and honestly, things just come naturally to him. He worked hard in school but did not have to overachieve. Missing a week of school was not a big deal. For someone else with the same workload it may have been a huge deal. Granted, we are in our early 30's so I know things have changed but I also think parent's expectations have changed. Absolutely encourage your children to reach their full potential but realize that Harvard may not be the choice for them and that's ok.......

Amen. We insist on post-secondary education, but it is their choice what it will be. Trade? College? University? Their choice.

 

[kpm76]

Amen. We insist on post-secondary education, but it is their choice what it will be. Trade? College? University? Their choice.

Exactly! And thank God for the fire fighters, plumbers and electricians, all of whom assisted us beyond words a few weeks ago when we were hard hit by the flooding in RI. My Doctor FIL doesn't even know how to turn on a pump to get the water out. I would have drown (not literally, but it felt that way) before he figured it out We all have different talents and skill sets and thank God for that

 

[declansdad]

THAT is insane! I would have been fighting that as her parent, I think.

If that is the rule regarding missed time, you should live with the consequences of your decision to pull a child from school. You can't have it both ways.

 

[crisi]

THAT is insane! I would have been fighting that as her parent, I think.

Why?, if its late for an unexcused absences, which vacation is, its late. We knew that going in. That's the policy. Its universally applied to all students and teaches them that they cannot miss responsibilities (like homework) for luxuries (like a week on a beach in Mexico).

 

[roscoepc1]

Why?, if its late for an unexcused absences, which vacation is, its late. We knew that going in. That's the policy. Its universally applied to all students and teaches them that they cannot miss responsibilities (like homework) for luxuries (like a week on a beach in Mexico).

I don't consider family vacations a luxury. As I said, we learned that the hard way. God, family, everything else. That's our motto.

And I explained a lot of my philosophy in other answers....

 

[roscoepc1]

If that is the rule regarding missed time, you should live with the consequences of your decision to pull a child from school. You can't have it both ways.

Which makes me even more grateful than usual that I don't have to deal with that in our Province....

Just b/c something is a "policy" or "rule" doesn't make it "right"....50 years ago it was policy that black children go to different schools than white. Policy and rule, but not right. (and no, before I get flamed, I don't place bigotry on the same level as this, it's JUST an example of policy and rule being WRONG.)

 

[kpm76]

I don't consider family vacations a luxury. As I said, we learned that the hard way. God, family, everything else. That's our motto.

And I explained a lot of my philosophy in other answers....

I agree. Don't get me wrong, school is very important, but I believe that learning can (and does) take place outside the confines of the classroom. I also don't believe in teaching to a test, which if we are being honest, is what educators are worried about. Traveling and exploring the world around you is one of the great gifts you can give your kids, not to mention the invaluable family time. My parents took me out of school for a week in 4th grade so I could travel to Canada with my dad and grandmother to visit family. It was an amazing experience and one that I still remember fondly. My father's family did not speak a lick of English and after just a week of immersion, I understood French and could speak enough to get by. That trip sparked an interest and I ended up minoring in French in college....and we are teaching it to DD2. I am willing to bet I learned more on that trip than what I missed in the classroom that week.

 

[declansdad]

Which makes me even more grateful than usual that I don't have to deal with that in our Province....

Just b/c something is a "policy" or "rule" doesn't make it "right"....50 years ago it was policy that black children go to different schools than white. Policy and rule, but not right. (and no, before I get flamed, I don't place bigotry on the same level as this, it's JUST an example of policy and rule being WRONG.)

You're right, you cannot compare the two things at all. If you decide to take your kids out of school, you have no basis for fighting the decision of the school/teachers regarding what happens to what your kids missed.

 

[roscoepc1]

You're right, you cannot compare the two things at all. If you decide to take your kids out of school, you have no basis for fighting the decision of the school/teachers regarding what happens to what your kids missed.

How about the right of a parent who didn't make the rule and doesn't agree with it? I thought America was supposed to be a free country? Canada is, and I can and will fight if that policy is put in place in our school board!

 

[badblackpug]

How about the right of a parent who didn't make the rule and doesn't agree with it? I thought America was supposed to be a free country? Canada is, and I can and will fight if that policy is put in place in our school board!

Well, I don't agree that I should have to drive 25mph on a certain road in my town, but I'm pretty sure that the police don't take my disagreement into consideration while writing me a ticket.....

Vacations are unexcused in our district. The students can't make up the work for unexcused absences and must accept a grade of "0" for them. This is a rule. It is in the student handbook. One must weigh the importance of taking their kids out of school for a vacation with the importance of their grades. It's your decision on which you put a greater importance, and you must accept the consequences of your decision, either way.

While it is true that not all learning experiences are confined to the classroom, it is also true that not all learning experiences are confined to a certain time period. Certainly, the things that children can learn in out of classroom experiences can be learned equally as well during fall, winter, spring or summer break, as they can during the school year.

 

[declansdad]

How about the right of a parent who didn't make the rule and doesn't agree with it? I thought America was supposed to be a free country? Canada is, and I can and will fight if that policy is put in place in our school board!

I don't know what province you live in, but in this one teachers are not required to provide make up work for students that miss time for vacations; however many will. You can disagree with it if you wish but this is one of the repurcusions of taking a child out of school for a vacation. There are plenty of times you can take a vacation without interfering with the school year. Now if you have circumstances that don't allow you to take a summer vacation (perhaps a job that doesn't allow it), that would change the situation and I'm sure you the teachers would work with you.

 

[crisi]

I don't consider family vacations a luxury. As I said, we learned that the hard way. God, family, everything else. That's our motto.

And I explained a lot of my philosophy in other answers....

But taking them out of school for it is a luxury - and family time is not a luxury, but a traveling vacation definitely IS. And if you want to participate in the school system, its their rules, not your priorities. Don't want to play by their rules, homeschool or send them to a school that shares your values. The school shouldn't have different rules for different kids based on their parents priorities.

 

[luvsJack]

How about the right of a parent who didn't make the rule and doesn't agree with it? I thought America was supposed to be a free country? Canada is, and I can and will fight if that policy is put in place in our school board!

I think you are missing the point. You don't have to abide by the rule if you do not wish to, but you DO have to deal with the consequences. The same as if your child breaks a rule and decides to skip school for the day to hang out at the mall; they will have to deal with the consequences. .

I understand your feelings that life is too short and I agree with you, but you can't expect the school systems to change their rules because of your feelings on this.

 

[roscoepc1]

You're not getting what I'm saying. Yes, if the rule exists, deal with the consequences...BUT, it is also a part of responsible parenting, imho, to be involved in what rules are made, and doing something about it when "wrong" rules, or rules you can't support are made by the Trustees and Board memebers who are answerable to the parents!

I don't agree with some of the rules mentioned here, so I would do something about it...get involved, try to instigate change, not just lie down and allow bureaucracy to steamroll over myself and my children.

I'm NOT saying I'd pitch a hissy fit and tell my kids they don't have to be answerable....I'm saying get involved....

As far as "which province" I'm aware teachers aren't required to supply make-up work, nor do I expect them to, but thankfully, we live in an area (deliberately) where our values are shared, and teachers agree with how I feel on the subject.

 

[crisi]

You're not getting what I'm saying. Yes, if the rule exists, deal with the consequences...BUT, it is also a part of responsible parenting, imho, to be involved in what rules are made, and doing something about it when "wrong" rules, or rules you can't support are made by the Trustees and Board memebers who are answerable to the parents!

I don't agree with some of the rules mentioned here, so I would do something about it...get involved, try to instigate change, not just lie down and allow bureaucracy to steamroll over myself and my children.

I'm NOT saying I'd pitch a hissy fit and tell my kids they don't have to be answerable....I'm saying get involved....

As far as "which province" I'm aware teachers aren't required to supply make-up work, nor do I expect them to, but thankfully, we live in an area (deliberately) where our values are shared, and teachers agree with how I feel on the subject.

Well, I think its a great rule. It teaches my kids the responsibility they will need to do well in a career, teaches them there are consequences for their actions. I think ALL schools should do it. So I'm certainly not going to fight it, and if I were to hear other parents were, I'd be an active supporter of it. Its really important for kids to develop discipline and an understanding of consequences to be successful - sometimes far more important than learning the material.

 

[roscoepc1]

Well, I think its a great rule. It teaches my kids the responsibility they will need to do well in a career, teaches them there are consequences for their actions. I think ALL schools should do it. So I'm certainly not going to fight it, and if I were to hear other parents were, I'd be an active supporter of it. Its really important for kids to develop discipline and an understanding of consequences to be successful - sometimes far more important than learning the material.

I think it's great you know how you feel about it. That's why and how the system works! Disagreement isn't always bad, it's what winnows out what IS bad, kwim?

Just shows there are as many different opinions as there are ideas.

I simply believe there should be flexibility within rules...just as a policeman can decide whether or not to issue the ticket, OR whether or not to lower the "charge" on it, there should be flexibility within a rule for different circumstances....Ie, if it's late for medical reasons, goofing off reasons, etc...

 

[RMulieri]

How about the right of a parent who didn't make the rule and doesn't agree with it? I thought America was supposed to be a free country? Canada is, and I can and will fight if that policy is put in place in our school board!

and with Freedom comes responisibility,accountability and consequence.It is right to question the rules,but in the end they are what they are.If you choose to take your child out of school( we do) than you ACCEPT the responsibility and are accountable for the consequences.Some school districts are more stringent and are less lenient.Know your school district rules and requirements before scheduling that trip.If you know ahead of time that the rules are quite strict , than you have a choice...Take the vacation anyway and accept the consequences of your actions, or not take the trip.For those that disagree with the school systems, and have the time and inclination, there is home schooling

 

[crisi]

I think it's great you know how you feel about it. That's why and how the system works! Disagreement isn't always bad, it's what winnows out what IS bad, kwim?

Just shows there are as many different opinions as there are ideas.

I simply believe there should be flexibility within rules...just as a policeman can decide whether or not to issue the ticket, OR whether or not to lower the "charge" on it, there should be flexibility within a rule for different circumstances....Ie, if it's late for medical reasons, goofing off reasons, etc...

Flexibility leads to favoritism and can be easily abused. In this case, its "unexcused absences" - medical reasons would be excused. Funeral leave would be excused. Vacations are not.