I don't mean to be dumb....but,

[mojophone]

I don't mean to be dumb, but why is it that I see so many posts where people say, "I have one boy and one girl, so they cannot share a bed?"

If that is a REALLY obvious question, I apologize. I only had a sister....so, we always shared everything. DH only had a brother....everything was "family style" in his home as well.

Right now, we have one dd. But, if we were fortunate enough to have another baby, and it was a boy...well, it just hadn't occurred to me that they couldn't share a bed on vacation. I mean, siblings who sleep in their own rooms at home won't like sharing a bed on a vacation...but, I thought it was just something kids dealt with.

I was just wondering why some families think boys and girls can't/shouldn't share a bed? I just always assumed that if we had one of each...they would share a bed on vacation.

Again....please don't flame me if this is a really stupid question...I am being totally serious.

TIA,
Beca

It's against the law

 

[MATTERHORN]

Oh, forgot to say. I always wonder why more people don't do what some of the PP's do (I do this as well) and sleep the mom with the girls and the dad with the boys. Just curious, the only reason I can figure is they don't want to sleep away from DH?? Can't figure that one out, it's still only for a few nights. Any thoughts?


Andrea

 

[MATTERHORN]

It's against the law

Oh please! That's rediculous! First of all, even if that's true at a certain age, who would be able to monitor that? You think I'm gonna end up in jail because my two kids shared a bed at a hotel. Gimme a break!


Andrea

 

[va32h]

Oh, forgot to say. I always wonder why more people don't do what some of the PP's do (I do this as well) and sleep the mom with the girls and the dad with the boys. Just curious, the only reason I can figure is they don't want to sleep away from DH?? Can't figure that one out, it's still only for a few nights. Any thoughts?

Yeah - I've heard this argument "oh I just can't bear to sleep away from my DH, even for one night". Oh please. Grown ups can survive a few nights not sleeping right next to their spouse, they won't shrivel up and die for pity's sake.

I certainly wouldn't force my kids to do something they find uncomfortable because it would make me feel better.

We have taken two trips since my oldest politely asked if she could please not share a bed with her little brother.

On one trip, we were already booked at AKL, so we just asked for a room with bunk beds, no problem. The next trip was at Shades of Green, huge room, we got a rollaway bed, no problem.

On our upcoming trip, we will be camping at Ft. Wilderness, so we will all be "sleeping on the floor" so to speak.

I don't feel as though I have had to bend over backwards to accommodate a whim - my daughter is naturally becoming more modest. She would rather not sleep in a bed with her brother. It is a very easy situation to resolve.

 

[lulugirl]

Oh please! That's rediculous! First of all, even if that's true at a certain age, who would be able to monitor that? You think I'm gonna end up in jail because my two kids shared a bed at a hotel. Gimme a break!


Andrea

Um...I think that was a joke?

 

[lulugirl]

Yeah - I've heard this argument "oh I just can't bear to sleep away from my DH, even for one night". Oh please. Grown ups can survive a few nights not sleeping right next to their spouse, they won't shrivel up and die for pity's sake.

I certainly wouldn't force my kids to do something they find uncomfortable because it would make me feel better.

We have taken two trips since my oldest politely asked if she could please not share a bed with her little brother.

On one trip, we were already booked at AKL, so we just asked for a room with bunk beds, no problem. The next trip was at Shades of Green, huge room, we got a rollaway bed, no problem.

On our upcoming trip, we will be camping at Ft. Wilderness, so we will all be "sleeping on the floor" so to speak.

I don't feel as though I have had to bend over backwards to accommodate a whim - my daughter is naturally becoming more modest. She would rather not sleep in a bed with her brother. It is a very easy situation to resolve.

ITA
I think when one of the children are uncomfortable w/ it, his/her feelings should be respected.

 

[2Princes2Princesses]

I asked my 13-yr-old for you. She said "I wouldn't mind sleeping with Gainey (sister who is 3) or Johnnie (brother who is 1)" I asked why she wouldn't share with Tom (her 11-yr-old brother). Her reply???

"He smells"

 

[mask_w03]

I know when my brother and i went on family vacations at a young age it didn't matter, but as we got older it really did matter to us both. When we did disney my mom got a bed, i got a bed and mybrother made the floor into his bed. On other family trips we would each get our own bed and parents would get their own. We usually ended up with a roll away or cot.

 

[MATTERHORN]

Um...I think that was a joke?

If it was, sorry! I didn't see any little laughing guys or anything so I didn't take it that way. My bad!

Andrea

 

[Beca]

Thanks for all the replies!!! My dh and I also figured that if we had problems, we would split the kids up. I guess the only difference for us would be that our dd would be the oldest, so she would probably end up sleeping with her dad, and I would sleep with the youngest (just a "Mommy comfort" thing).

I have to admit...I never liked sharing a bed with my sister (or my dh with his brother) but I cannot IMAGINE that my mom would've allowed even a roll-away bed in the room. We were definitely told to "suck it up, or we're going home".

But, being in a house with ALL girls (no dad in the picture), modesty was something we never even thought about. A shut bathroom door...what's that? Even now, my dd walks right in on me or her daddy when she "needs" us. I guess there is no privacy here, either.

I just don't understand the different dynamics of having children of both genders. I assumed (maybe incorrectly) that nothing would really be different. That there would be a "closeness" that would make separate beds not necessary. I guess I was wrong.

Bottom line, it is "your" vacation....so, whatever makes people happy is what they should do (well, barring anything "illegal" ). I just wanted to make sure I wasn't being REALLY obtuse about something!!!

Thanks again,



Beca

 

[Marty Moose]

Um...I think that was a joke?

Alright, I may be totally ignorant on this one...but I believe that some states actually do have (seldom inforced, I'm sure) laws about this.

I know I had a friend who ran into this problem when trying to rent a two bedroom apartment (I forget which state she was living in...I want to say Delaware) for herself, her dd and ds. They said by law they could not allow the two kids to room together (BTW- she had planned to share the master with her daughter and let her son have the second room to himself.) Maybe they were just blowing smoke up her patootie...because she ended up doing just that at another apartment complex that didn't say a word about it!

Personally, I think it's different in every situation. It depends on the ages, how the kids feel about it and what the parents believe is right/wrong. When we go down in Oct my kids (ds5 & dd2) will probably share a bed even though we are sharing a 2bd villa with just my mom, so they could have separate beds if they wanted. I don't see anything wrong with that...

Now, when they get a little older and one possibly begins to complain, then I will have to take their complaints into consideration. Are they genuinely uncomfortable? Or are they just whining because the other hogs the covers or take the "good" pillow? In some cases they will just have to "suck it up"...others, I would definitely try to accomodate.

But honestly, if the four of us are sharing a motel room for a few nights I don't think that sharing a bed is going to turn my kids into sexual deviants! Of course, I could always make them each sleep with one foot on the floor ala Joannie & Chachi!

Just my 2cents...

 

[gillenkl]

I have twins age 6, a boy and a girl. On vacations, my DH sleeps in the bed with DS and I sleep in the bed with DD. For us, it just doesn't feel proper to have them sleep in the same bed together. That's just us. Every family should do what is right for them.

 

[weirdpaintballr]

My cousin and I (I'm a girl, 14, he's a guy, 15) don't have anyproblem sharing a bed. If it was the floor or sharing, we would share. No big deal. We always have, and we probably will if its needed...Now, we are getting a little big and its not as roomy as it used to be... but we've always been close and we just dont care.

 

[Microcell]

We have to seperate our DS4 and DD8 because he touches her nose and it bugs her. Now it is a big thing!! DD is the best bed partner of the bunch, so DH and I are currently fighting over who gets her this trip. No, I do not think anything strange will happen if DH sleeps with her. We will be in the same room for petes sake!

Seriously, I may have just overprotected my kids or something, but I do not think either of them is even thinking in a sexual manner at all, muchless with each other!

 

[irishbosoxfan]

In my family we always slept together-me,sis(year and a half younger),brother(6 years younger)
The last time we all slept together was about 1 year before I got married(bro was about 12/13)--we all went to the mountains and the 3 of us had a king size bed--I did end up sleeping in the tub because my brother kept passing gas

Plus when we went to my grandmothers in Maine all the kids slept in the attic--Old farmhouse,2 floors-second floor was called the attic--was one big room that my dad and his 4 brothers and 1 sister shared until the day she got married

But anyways all the kids slept in the attic--usually about 9 or 10 kids both male and female and the parents would lay out blankets on the floor and we would all just jumble together to sleep---My last time sleeping with everyone on the floor was when I was about 16

 

[Becky2005]

Oh, forgot to say. I always wonder why more people don't do what some of the PP's do (I do this as well) and sleep the mom with the girls and the dad with the boys. Just curious, the only reason I can figure is they don't want to sleep away from DH?? Can't figure that one out, it's still only for a few nights. Any thoughts?


Andrea

I guess it all depends on what you grew up with. We had mom/girl and dad/boy plus then a cot (since we were a family of 5 -- we always fought for who got the cot & I usually WON. I loved the cot! I guess that was my prize for being squished in the back of the station wagon on the seat that had the "hump" for the floor so my knees were always squished!)

My DH on the other hand always slept with his sister on vacation.

I personally would never even consider putting my 2 oldest together -- there might be bloodshed -- or if nothing else blood curtling screams from each other of "LEAVE ME ALONE" because they like to just poke at each other to annoy the other one.

On our last vacation (not WDW) the sleeping arrangement for the first day ended up with DD & the youngest DS together in the pull-out bed (but there is a 10 year difference) because they didn't give us the pack & play...in addition *I* ended up in the bed at the foot of it just trying to get DS settled down to sleep since we didn't get there until late. The older boys were in 1 bed together (they share a bedroom with bunk beds at home too, so they are used to be near each other).

Since I grew up sleeping with either my mom or my sister on vacation (if not on the cot) and my dad sleeping with my brother, it just would seem weird to me to do it any other way.