Hello, all! Since we got home so late last night (early this morning), we skipped the 5:45 visit. Jill needed to stay doped up on morphine and be asleep as much as possible. This morning, she has been receiving blood. She still has a slight fever. She is doing breathing treatments and coughing up lots of gunk. Not so pleasant. 
John is going for the 1:00 visit, and then we are all going tonight, thanks to sweet Nurse Gloria, whose heart is aching for Jill's situation. I know it will be hard to see them and have them leave, though. I hope the grown-ups can do a good job of sucking it up and making it 'light' for the girls tonight so as not to make them upset. The tears can come after they are asleep.
I can't tell you how much it hurts me that Jill can't be home with her new baby. I can't imagine the feeling. I am glad she is coming in and out of a morphine sleep so that she is not awake every minute thinking about it. As much as I love caring for Sophie - snuggling with her and bonding with her - I will gladly hand her over to her Mommy the first minute she is able to have her. I was cleaning her umbilical cord and hoping it will not fall off until Jill is home. That's a silly mom thing, I guess, but opening the diaper and seeing the cord fall off is her special little moment in time, not mine. I love this baby with all of my heart and soul, but I want my baby/her mother to be here in this house basking in the joy of new motherhood and doing the cuddling.
We all appreciate your prayers so very much. You guys mean so much to us, and in times like these, we realize it in a deep way. When John and I were on the way to the hospital last night, we talked about how unique it was to know that people from so many places were going to be right there with us at the hospital.
You know that I am me, and in my sadness, stress, and times of trouble, I also try to find the humor. Last night, as we were driving to the hospital, John was talking a mile a minute about his job. I know nothing about his job, except that his paycheck takes care of my girls. It is far too technical for me. Anyway, I almost laughed, but I held it back, because I was thinking of the teacher's voice in Charlie Brown. All I was hearing was Wa wa waw wa waa wa waa wing design wa waa wa waa security code wawa wawa wa waa government contract . I was trying to say, "Uh huh," enough to seem interested, but in my mind, I was already with Jill. I know that was his way of calming his nerves, to talk about something he was comfortable about and avoid the unknown we were facing, but it was kind of comical.
Please continue to pray for my Jilly-bean. I love her so much, and I cannot imagine my life without her. So many people have told us over the past 48 hours how lucky we were that we came on in. We have heard stories of people who went through the same and did not come out with the same results, and that just crushes me to think about. We will keep you posted. Hug your kids one extra time tonight in Jill's honor, if you will. It will make me feel good at bedtime to know there was one extra little hug from a Mom or Dad who loves their 'baby', no matter what age, because of what Jill is having to endure.
John is going for the 1:00 visit, and then we are all going tonight, thanks to sweet Nurse Gloria, whose heart is aching for Jill's situation. I know it will be hard to see them and have them leave, though. I hope the grown-ups can do a good job of sucking it up and making it 'light' for the girls tonight so as not to make them upset. The tears can come after they are asleep.
I can't tell you how much it hurts me that Jill can't be home with her new baby. I can't imagine the feeling. I am glad she is coming in and out of a morphine sleep so that she is not awake every minute thinking about it. As much as I love caring for Sophie - snuggling with her and bonding with her - I will gladly hand her over to her Mommy the first minute she is able to have her. I was cleaning her umbilical cord and hoping it will not fall off until Jill is home. That's a silly mom thing, I guess, but opening the diaper and seeing the cord fall off is her special little moment in time, not mine. I love this baby with all of my heart and soul, but I want my baby/her mother to be here in this house basking in the joy of new motherhood and doing the cuddling.
We all appreciate your prayers so very much. You guys mean so much to us, and in times like these, we realize it in a deep way. When John and I were on the way to the hospital last night, we talked about how unique it was to know that people from so many places were going to be right there with us at the hospital.
You know that I am me, and in my sadness, stress, and times of trouble, I also try to find the humor. Last night, as we were driving to the hospital, John was talking a mile a minute about his job. I know nothing about his job, except that his paycheck takes care of my girls. It is far too technical for me. Anyway, I almost laughed, but I held it back, because I was thinking of the teacher's voice in Charlie Brown. All I was hearing was Wa wa waw wa waa wa waa wing design wa waa wa waa security code wawa wawa wa waa government contract . I was trying to say, "Uh huh," enough to seem interested, but in my mind, I was already with Jill. I know that was his way of calming his nerves, to talk about something he was comfortable about and avoid the unknown we were facing, but it was kind of comical.
Please continue to pray for my Jilly-bean. I love her so much, and I cannot imagine my life without her. So many people have told us over the past 48 hours how lucky we were that we came on in. We have heard stories of people who went through the same and did not come out with the same results, and that just crushes me to think about. We will keep you posted. Hug your kids one extra time tonight in Jill's honor, if you will. It will make me feel good at bedtime to know there was one extra little hug from a Mom or Dad who loves their 'baby', no matter what age, because of what Jill is having to endure.
Kind of like me sometimes with Matt telling work stories! 
It really hits home as my oldest is in college 8 hours away and my baby is taking her senior pictures and getting ready to go off on her own. I have been watching videos from when I was pregnant and in hospital with both DD's and just thinking about not being able to be with them right away makes me so sad. It just kills me a little inside now, when I can't be there when the oldest DD is sick. Thank goodness you could be by Jill's side helping her out! I just knew your heart would be breaking with your baby in the hospital and her baby far from her arms. 
