I don't even know if I can post this...Adult Content!

[MouseWorshipin]

So, I'm going about my day, doing laundry as I do daily, going through pockets to put pants in the washer. I pull out a little scrap of paper from DS-17's pockets.

But the paper isn't regular paper. It is a half of a...prophylactic...package. AAAARARRRRRGGHHH!

So, the next morning, I hand it to him and say, "I found this in your pocket. I don't want to find another one. OK?" And he stands there, deer in the headlights. His mouth sloowly opens, but nothing comes out. Again, I say, "OH...KAAAY?" And he says, "yeah," only he couldn't get the "y" sound out, so it was more "eah." Then I give a short, but perturbed sigh, and turn around and walk away, leaving him there holding it. I hope that'll stay with him.

DH finds the whole thing AMUSING. Said he'll talk to him and encourage use of condoms. I'm thinking this is not enough, but I do NOT want to talk to him about it.

I dunno. Denial gets a bad rap, in my opinion. I'm tempted to forget the whole thing.

What would you do?

Edited to Add: And don't you think the punk could at least make some attempt to HIDE IT FROM HIS MOTHER??????! Ugh.

 

[Holly]

I would just be happy that he's using them.


Poor Mouse. Parenting teens isn't easy, is it?

 

[Free4Life11]

What's a prophylactic?

 

[4DisneyfansinNC]

Oh gosh, I don't know what I would have done. I've got at least 10 years to prepare I guess. If he's gonna do it, at least he's being safe!

 

[Holly]

What's a prophylactic?

A condom.

 

[Free4Life11]

A condom.

Oh ok.

 

[figment52]

At least he is using condoms. Now he needs to understand that they are not 100%.
That being said, I understand your feelings, 17 is still too young. Hope you can get over the shock and talk calmly to him.

 

[lulugirl]

I agree w/ Holly, be glad he's using protection.
Dad having a talk w/ him is probably a good idea.

Just curious, I'm sure you're not happy that your teenager is "active" but what did you hope to accomplish by humiliating him?

 

[Tjaleks]

I know when my boys get older my motto for them will be "don't leave home without one". It not that I am going to encourage sex, but I will not be with them 24/7 and kids have sex. I love my boys, but I don't want to be a grandma before I am 40. I have seriously thought about having a bowl of condoms by the front door with pictures of STD's wrapped around it so they can see what could possibly happen if they are careless.

As it stands now my oldest has no interest in girls, (neither does my youngest for that matter). We will see, only time will tell.

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

So, I'm going about my day, doing laundry as I do daily, going through pockets to put pants in the washer. I pull out a little scrap of paper from DS-17's pockets.

But the paper isn't regular paper. It is a half of a...prophylactic...package. AAAARARRRRRGGHHH!

So, the next morning, I hand it to him and say, "I found this in your pocket. I don't want to find another one. OK?" And he stands there, deer in the headlights. His mouth sloowly opens, but nothing comes out. Again, I say, "OH...KAAAY?" And he says, "yeah," only he couldn't get the "y" sound out, so it was more "eah." Then I give a short, but perturbed sigh, and turn around and walk away, leaving him there holding it. I hope that'll stay with him.

DH finds the whole thing AMUSING. Said he'll talk to him and encourage use of condoms. I'm thinking this is not enough, but I do NOT want to talk to him about it.

I dunno. Denial gets a bad rap, in my opinion. I'm tempted to forget the whole thing.

What would you do?

I would be mortified! I wouldn't be amused, but I think it is time to talk with him- not about using condoms, he obviously got that lesson, but about sex being an adult activity with serious physical, emotional and social consequences, based on whatever beliefs you'd like to share with him.

My parents never talked to me about sex or anything, and I always wish I had had a more comfortable environment to ask questions.

As a high school teacher, I have many students who ask me questions. I'd rather answer their questions that have a tenth teen mom in my classes (Yes, I have 9 moms/moms-to-be in my 5 classes) I also know of at least ten students who have told me they regret beginning to early or being with a certain person. I always tell them "Not only should you protect your body physically from diseases, you must also try to protect your heart." At least he's responsible enough to be trying to prevent you from being a grandmother- look on the bright side!

You're being a good mom and trying your best. Parenting is a tough job- and the teenage years is one reason I seriously consider not having kids. I don't know if I could handle it! Good luck to you!!!

 

[MouseWorshipin]

Just curious, I'm sure you're not happy that your teenager is "active" but what did you hope to accomplish by humiliating him?

I hope that he will not leave his...evidence...around for ME to find.


And he doesn't even have a GIRLFRIEND. He leaves for college (Princeton!) in the fall, and I just wish this could have waited until then.

It is so under my skin that I think I may just have to jump into my canoe and paddle my way down the river of De Nile.

 

[Free4Life11]

I saw a billboard the other day:

"First comes sex,
Forget about marriage,
Jennys left standing with the baby carriage."

I would talk to him. My parents didn't talk to me, just gave me books, and the school taught us nothing. I didn't learn about STD's until I came to college.

 

[vivilasvegas]

I saw a billboard the other day:

"First comes sex,
Forget about marriage,
Jennys left standing with the baby carriage."

I would talk to him. My parents didn't talk to me, just gave me books, and the school taught us nothing. I didn't learn about STD's until I came to college.

My parents never talked to me about sex. My friends never had "the talk" either. But somehow we all managed to figure out what sex was and the consequences of it, before college!!

do kids really still need "the talk"??

 

[Free4Life11]

I'm not talking about getting pregnant. I'm talking about learning things like herpes is for life, you CAN get STD's from oral sex, etc. Learning what the signs of STD's are, what they are, how you can get them, etc.

 

[FreshTressa]

17 is actually not that young these days!

I would have told him I was proud he was smart enough to use them, then go buy him a bunch more. (the whole thing would creep me out, but I would never let HIM know that!)

 

[vivilasvegas]

I'm not talking about getting pregnant. I'm talking about learning things like herpes is for life, you CAN get STD's from oral sex, etc. Learning what the signs of STD's are, what they are, how you can get them, etc.

I knew what you meant, that's why I said the consequences of having sex.

 

[Free4Life11]

I knew what you meant, that's why I said the consequences of having sex.

Ok well I'm glad you learned the consequences. Not everyone does, what's your point?

ETA - I think schools need to teach about all the STD's, exactly how you can get them and what their symptoms are.

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

I hope that he will not leave his...evidence...around for ME to find.


And he doesn't even have a GIRLFRIEND. He leaves for college (Princeton!) in the fall, and I just wish this could have waited until then.

It is so under my skin that I think I may just have to jump into my canoe and paddle my way down the river of De Nile.

lol

Humor heals all wounds!

Maybe he has a girlfriend you don't know about? I kept my current boyfriend a secret from my parents for the first 8 months (We've now been together 4 years) because of how strict they were. (I was also almost 22)

Maybe he was goofing around with his friends, not even using them for sex. I know when I was in high school boys would blow them up, leave them for girls to find to gross them out, etc. Not all were used for actual sex. (Maybe I'm giving you some fuel to paddle down that river, huh?)

Good luck!

 

[Holly]

He leaves for college (Princeton!) in the fall, and I just wish this could have waited until then.

Wow! Congratulations! What is he planning on studying?

It is so under my skin that I think I may just have to jump into my canoe and paddle my way down the river of De Nile

I don't blame you.

 

[vivilasvegas]

Ok well I'm glad you learned the consequences. Not everyone does, what's your point?

harumph, if you are going to talk to me like that, then I'm leaving!!!


My point, is that I don't think you are the norm. I am 32, and we had sex ed classes in high school, some of my friends in grade school. So in this day and age, I figured "the talk" isn't actually needed anymore.