I can't believe it

[CanadianPaco]

My father in law passed away suddenly Friday night of a massive heart attack. As sudden and unexpected as can be. My in laws are divorced but were friends so there has been little family drama in the planning of the funeral. DH and his sister are co-executors and funeral plans have been set for early this week.

And we are going to WDW for Xmas...

We booked a room only trip so all I have paid is the deposit on the room. But I have until Wed to cancel and get my deposit back. The flights were booked online so if I cancel the best I'll get is a partial credit after the cancellation fee.

DH wants to go - to get away from all that is happening but feels guilty for leaving family. I know DD would be crushed if the trip is cancelled. All his sisters say we should go, his mom too. Guilt and shock are messing us all up...

It's never a good time for these things but it is so much harder at the holidays.

 

[golfgal]

I don't see any reason to cancel your vacation. The funeral will be over and there isn't all that much you can do if you are not executor of the will. I would hope your family would understand and if you need to help clean out his house, etc., do that when you get back.

 

[Shelly F - Ohio]

So sorry for your sudden loss. I would not cancel the trip. This trip might be the best thing for your DH. The first holiday after a loved one passes can be hard to deal with. So going to Disney may help him get through the holiday. GO and have a good time.

 

[Mermaid02]

Take your trip.

Sorry for your family's loss.

 

[bballmom56]

Go. You couldn't know this was going to happen when you made the plans. You have the support of his family. Nothing that happens while you are gone can't wait until you get back and maybe it will help him deal with things with a clearer head.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I am sorry about your FIL. I think you should go, but recognize that it will probably be bittersweet for your DH. Be sure to give him space if he needs it and try to keep the stress levels down.

 

[Darcy03231]

Go. From the way you've talked about him I'm sure your FIL would not have wanted you to cancel your trip.

 

[anniemae]

I would go, you will not be missing the funeral. I don't see any reason to cancel your trip if all of you want to go.

 

[abdmom]

You can't change what has happened. There is nothing that will need attention that week that can't be done before or after your trip. Go on your trip and have fun.

December 10 is my least favorite day of the year. DH died 5 years ago Friday evening. Every year, I've made myself miserable at Christmas trying to do what I'm "supposed" to do: that is, have a traditional Family Christmas. This year, I'm going on a cruise instead.

Do what you need to do to make YOUR family (dh and dd) happy.

 

[The Pink Cupcake]

You can't change what has happened. There is nothing that will need attention that week that can't be done before or after your trip. Go on your trip and have fun.

This is good advice

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Sounds like you are going to be here for the funeral, right? I think "getting away" is probably a good thing.

Sorry for your loss.

 

[diz8297]

I am so sorry for your loss. Sounds like the trip will be just what you and your family will need. A new spin on tradition if you will. God bless.

 

[Momto2PrncChrmgs]

Agree with everyone else. Go. Esp since your DH is saying he wants to still go.

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

Sorry for your loss.

Follow your husband's lead about the vacation. If he still wants to go, he probably needs to go more than he will admit.

 

[figment52]

I am sorry about your FIL. I think you should go, but recognize that it will probably be bittersweet for your DH. Be sure to give him space if he needs it and try to keep the stress levels down.

I am sorry for your loss.

Except for the time of year this same thing that happened to me. We lost my father unexpectedly about 3 weeks before a trip that had been for over a year. With the support of my siblings and other close friends I still went on the trip. As the post above said, there will be moments but it will be ok.

 

[LuLuO]

I would still go on vacation. I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[agnes!]

My sympathies on your family's loss. And if your DH wants to go and his side of the family is on-board about it and it would crush your DD if you-all didn't go?...I agree with them and think you should go too.

WWYFILHWYTD?...what would your FIL have wanted you to do... I am positive that with all the love I can see in your post and from what you've said about the family that he would want his son and daughter-in-law and grandchild to proceed with their plans. Yes, it will be bittersweet, but go and try to remember all the good times.

agnes!

 

[ldymcbth]

So sorry for your loss. I would leave it up to your DH and if he wants to go, then go. The aftermath of a family death will still be there after vacation for DH to help with.

 

[Disney Doll]

If DH wants to go and his extended family is in support of going, then go.
Estates don't get probated in 10 minutes...there will be plenty of time when you return to attend to all those details...