I am SO Scared of Driving.

[Nomi]

I have my second driving test tomorrow. Third time I'll have ever driven. And I can't sleep because I start hyperventilating, so I'll vent until instead.

Let's make a list.
Horror movies - Not Scary.
Ghosts - Not Scary.
Heights - Not Scary
Snakes - Not Scary
Spiders - Not Scary
Needles - A little spooky

Driving - Freaking terrifying!

I would not even be attempting if I did not have to. I always thought if I made it to 20 without learning to drive, I wouldn't have to. Poop.

That is all.

 

[usnuzuloose]

What is making you terrified? Thats a good place to start.

 

[Nomi]

Mostly death, being maimed, other people driving, other people getting hurt, fun stuff like that.

 

[usnuzuloose]

If I may ask how are you? Have you been in a car accident? If there is not a need for this right away maybe you could do some counseling as it seems there is something far worse going on causing you to feel this way. How did your other driving tests go?

 

[Nomi]

Oops, not a test, just a lesson!I've not had in car tests done before. Like I said, it's only my third time driving.

I can honestly say I suck at driving. You know that other thread in which a drivers foot slipped from the brake to the gas? I've done that twice now (In parking lots and empty residential streets going roughly 0.0001 kph, but still). I don't know how it doesn't happen to other people. The gas a brake seem very close together to me.

I've never been in an accident. My sister was in one, thankfully very minor. I have been to counselling for other things a while ago. I'm more paranoid about the possibility of hurting someone else, honestly. However, like most people my age, I know of a few kids I went to school with who got seriously hurt, paralyzed, and killed in car accidents. I would be in the minority if I didn't.

I just wish I could postpone the lesson with the instructor until I have more experience getting used to the sensitivity of the wheel/pedals/ect in parking lots. Driving still feels so alien to me.

Gah, I feel foolish about this. In the past year I was able to get over my fear of people enough to get a job, learn to take the bus and a taxi, use the phone, do my own banking, cook (with knives and fire) fly by myself to take a solo trip to WDW, apply to school and find a place to live once I move! But driving still seems like too much.

Oh, hello paralyzing fear! I haven't seen you for over a year! Can't say I've missed you.

Yay. >_<

 

[usnuzuloose]

My best advice would be do it only when you feel comfortable, dont rush yourself. Driving takes practice, and once you do it I am sure you will be a very cautous and safe driver. The more you do it the easier it becomes. Just take it one step at a time. I would continue the counseling. Take care and let us know how things are going with you. Many to you. Jo

 

[Nomi]

Thank you. I do have one more counselling appointment before I go to school in January, and will continue after I leave since I am currently on a low dose of antidepressants.

I think I just need someone I can complain to more than counselling right now. If I could, I would like to opt out of the driving instruction tomorrow for some less intense driving around less busy areas. I may phone my instructor tomorrow morning and see if I can reschedule.

I'm still hoping that I can go through life not having to drive, but in a big, spread out country like Canada, it's all but impossible.

The Jetsons promised me self-automated flying cars when I was a kid, gosh darn it!

 

[Huggles]

Speak to your instructor and explain your fears and worries. If he/she can't reassure you and lay your fears to rest, then think about changing instructors for one who is prepared to go very slow in the learning process or for one who has experience with nervous drivers. I know that, locally, we have instructors who advertise the fact that they are experienced with nervous learners and there are others who also make it known that they even take on drivers who have passed their test, but don't feel that confident when out on their own. I know several folk who have moved from small town to city and, for whom, driving became terrifying. They went to one of the aforementioned instructors and are now quite happy to drive in the chaos that is city living.

Good luck, you'll manage no bother, I'm sure.

 

[Nomi]

Speak to your instructor and explain your fears and worries. If he/she can't reassure you and lay your fears to rest, then think about changing instructors for one who is prepared to go very slow in the learning process or for one who has experience with nervous drivers. I know that, locally, we have instructors who advertise the fact that they are experienced with nervous learners and there are others who also make it known that they even take on drivers who have passed their test, but don't feel that confident when out on their own. I know several folk who have moved from small town to city and, for whom, driving became terrifying. They went to one of the aforementioned instructors and are now quite happy to drive in the chaos that is city living.

Good luck, you'll manage no bother, I'm sure.

I'll certainly talk to him, but I only have X many in car classes. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who is terrified of driving though.

I may be forced to cancel tomorrow if I cannot get to sleep soon.

 

[Mermaid02]

I didn't get my license until I was 27. I was scared to drive too- but we moved out into the country and I had to drive. Once I started I never looked back, I can't imagine not driving now. My advice is to just try to push through your fear! You can do it!!

 

[golfgal]

If you are so scared of driving that you can't sleep perhaps it isn't the best idea that you go driving or get a license. Plenty of people manage without a drivers license through their entire lives.

 

[Owlpost23]

If this is only your third time driving,you aren't ready to pass a driving test.Here in the states,at least here in IL you have to have a minimum of fifty hours practicing before you can take a driver's test.The hours have to be logged,and initialed by a parent or guardian.Practice more to get your confidence up.You'll really enjoy the freedom of not having to count on anyone else to drive you around.Good luck!

 

[Hannathy]

You should postpone it until you have had more opportunity to go driving with someone else in a controlled area like a parking lot or a large office complex when they are closed. With My DD they only get so many behind the wheel sessions so they advise doing a lot of practice before they take you so they can get you the experience on busy streets and technique but you are over the initial getting used to it phase. Who are you going out to practice with? You need to be going out with someone, you can't just do it with a paid class (unless you have mega money to pay for extra sessions)

Driving is a skill and while most people can and do learn to drive there are some who can't and if you are one of those please for your safety and mine and my families if you don't think you can handle it don't go out and risk hurting yourself or killing an innocent person when you panic or can't handle it.

There are tens of thousands if not millions of people who live in cities that never drive and manage without problems.

 

[Magpie]

I think you're the only one who can judge what you're capable of (well, and your driving instructor and therapist, but that's not really what I mean).

What I mean is, you're under no obligation to drive. You do have to be able to hold down a job and earn a paycheck and live on your own. Those are all necessary life skills. Driving a car? Not so much.

I took three driving courses, the last one with the Canadian military. I took them because everyone told me I HAD to learn to drive. I flunked them all. I took a good hard look at myself and said, "Kid, the roads will be safer without you on them", and I stopped trying. A couple years ago, my eye doctor commented that she wouldn't be comfortable with me driving - because of my double vision!

Gee... I wonder if that might have had anything to do with flunking all those driving courses?

In any case, I don't drive and never have. My best friend doesn't drive (she's on meds for depression) and never has. It's perfectly possible to get comfortably through life without a car. And walking/biking is healthy!

So, no pressure. Drive if you want to. Don't drive if you don't want to. It's up to you.

 

[golfgal]

If this is only your third time driving,you aren't ready to pass a driving test.Here in the states,at least here in IL you have to have a minimum of fifty hours practicing before you can take a driver's test.The hours have to be logged,and initialed by a parent or guardian.Practice more to get your confidence up.You'll really enjoy the freedom of not having to count on anyone else to drive you around.Good luck!

Chances are this only applies to those under 18, she is older then that.

 

[Mermaid02]

I was just as scared as the OP. I was convinced I was going to crash and kill myself and others. I put it off until I was 27- I took drivers ed in high school, but my dh really taught me how to drive when I was 26. I flunked my first driving test but passed the second and never looked back. I am an excellent driver now.


OP- take it slow and steady- but you can conquer this!

 

[kamik86]

I hate driving. I only do it because I want to go places and my DH hates driving too. I have only really been scared to drive once though... My mom taught me to drive, then I did the in car lessons and was all good, made one or two could have been bad mistakes (Like forgetting one road was two lanes on each side of a meridan and almost going down the wrong side) but was stopped and learned better. Then two days before my test my dad wanted me to drive with him... he started screaming, I was crying, he didn't think I was anywhere near ready blah blah blah.

I passed the test. Oh and the only thing they really made me do besides drive down the road was reverse park (I can parallel park but can't reverse park, I'm afraid of hitting stuff but I managed ok.)

A few things... have your eyes been checked? I have gotten alot better since I had mine checked almost 2 years ago... I passed the dmv eye tests with no problem but I had an astigmatism... which tend to make you not see lines perfectly straight and have trouble judging distances (not good when driving) since I got glasses for it I park MUCH better because I can actually tell how close the other cars are. (I used to be that annoying car parked crooked and out of the lines)

I can honestly say I suck at driving. You know that other thread in which a drivers foot slipped from the brake to the gas? I've done that twice now (In parking lots and empty residential streets going roughly 0.0001 kph, but still). I don't know how it doesn't happen to other people. The gas a brake seem very close together to me.

How close the pedals are depends on the car, just like how sensitive they are. My car this is almost impossible to do because the break and gas are so far apart and staggered so the break is closer then the gas. My moms car they are closer though.

 

[Jennasis]

You don't sound ready to be driving. A terrified driver is a dangerous driver. You need to take a step back and deal with your fear before you get behind the wheel.

I have a cousin who doesn't drive. He's too scared. At 27, a single dad, and the manager of a restaurant, he manages to get where he has to go.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I just want to send a .

It took me a looooong time to learn to drive as well, and I still take the train when I go into the city. But I'm comfortable around town and on familiar routes now, and I purposely add a new one to that list every so often.

When you have a really good reason (and not just "beacuse everyone does it" - their are plenty of people who don't) you'll be able to get over your fear. But it has to be because you want some specific benefit of driving, not just to do it. Once you have a concrete motivation - like a certain place you want to go to that's not on the bus line, the focus will shift from the negative thought "I can't do something everyone else can do" to the positive one "I want ____, and this is a way to get it."

It will take time to be really confortable, but that's not a bad thing: it's good to be a careful driver. And after the initial hurdles, it does get easier.

Good luck!

 

[PixieDustandEeyore]

Nomi,
Im 22 and I just did Drivers Ed this year. I used to be you terrified of driving, well more so the other people on the road and pedestrians. After drivers ed and the 10 in car lessons (10 hrs total) I felt very comfortable. I go for my test next week (everyone fingers crossed for me) after the in car lesson portion I think you'll see your confidence raise. I told my instructor straight off I cant do this, im okay with this etc he started me in a quiet area with limited challenges then each lesson pushed the envelope to where by the last lesson I was driving 100 kph on the Trans Canada

Good luck with your lessons and I hope they ease your fears!