Hucifer does the solo thing sort of. Alone and going home, 9/21

[NMAmy]

Sorry, guys, I know I'm quoting stuff from like 5 pages ago and you're all like, "Jeez, this is SO two weeks ago!" but some of the comments were too good to pass by without replying.

Hucifer, I really think you need to take a good, hard look at your portrait:

and repeat to yourself, Stuart Smalley-style: I am riveting. People stare at me because I am so riveting. Etc.

I read this and laughed out loud and thought, "Wow, that norybell is freaking hilarious." Then I read this:

Thanks, sis.

and this:

Okay, not really. Mom always said, "There are no stupid questions. Just stupid people."

She was always so wise, that Mom of ours.

You two are sisters?

Yep.

The new Mexico ride still sucks.

The end.

Hey, I'm right here. Quit dissing New Mexico.

That’s the first thing you’ve posted that actually looks good. Your food usually looks like a handful of something you pulled up from the garden at the Grand Floridian.

I'm actually forced to agree with Lou on this one.

Quoting you: Who knew that there was a bridge on the other side of the big hill where you can watch people get splashed at the bottom?

E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y (damn newbie). Where is New Michigan Amy when I need her?

Here I am! Yeah, I knew about the bridge but in my haste to catch up, I forgot to mock hucifer. I must hang my head in shame that I missed such an opportunity.

I think she's abandoned me like half of my readers did when I went on my month-long hiatus.

I'd never abandon you. I just didn't realize we were done with the hiatus until you poked me.

I DIDN'T HAVE MY FANNYPACK WITH ME! Dammit people! Pay attention!

With no photographic evidence to the contrary, I'm having difficulty believing that you've actually given up the security of that thing. Although I do see the difficulty in proving that you DIDN'T have a fanny pack with you. I just have a hard time imagining the most vehement defender of the fannypack letting it go if there was no one to see her using it.

I have to agree. Who doesn’t think of those bad axis people while gently riding down the Rio Del Tiempo?

I always kind of wish they'd choose that particular time to stage a coup of some sort. Just to liven it up a bit.

 

[NMAmy]

I'm just ignoring the yanking comment from your Will Smith installment because...well, everyone else beat me to it.

…Like riding Buzz Lightyear three times in a row, and each time hitting 999,999 points. They post my picture (which turns out amazingly awesome…I look gorgeous and thin) and permanently hang it on the wall with a Space Hero Hucifer plaque under it.

…Or Disney opening up Space Mountain just for me and letting me ride the newly designed attraction all by myself. No wait, they ask Will Smith to join me. We ride for two hours in the dark.

…On Carousel of Progress they ask me to get on stage and act out each scene as if I were written into it. At the end of each segment, the audience gives a standing ovation. Will Smith brings me a bouquet of red roses.

…Or getting stuck on TTA at one of the dark parts with nothing to do but sit and wait with my riding partner, who happens to be Will Smith.

…Or being coerced into laying on Sonny Eclipse’s piano in a sparkly evening gown and singing a duet of Planetary Boogie with Sonny while folks are dining on their hamburgers and chicken. I’m so good, everyone stops eating just to listen and watch my breathtaking performance. After a set, Sonny presents me with a Most Excellent Singer Ever award and I get a kiss on the left cheek by Mickey. Will Smith kisses my right.

And that’s just Tomorrowland. Think of the possibilities in the other lands. Wow, this trip report is really getting good. Hooray for crappy note taking!

Hooray is right! Maybe when you finish this trip report next summer, you could start right in on a fake trip report that would include these kind of entries. Because I would totally love that.

…
Anyway, I’m in Tomorrowland. A cast member was standing under the Laugh Floor standby sign, which said 999 minutes. I pointed up. “That’s a long wait,” I said to him.

“It’s a popular attraction,” he said.

It must be much better than I remember.

I decide that’s too long of a wait. Unofficial Guide tells me to come back later, anyway.

And we must obey the law...I mean the guide.

ubiquitous,

Excellent use of your word of the day calendar!

Sadly, instead of seeing Will Smith, I saw lots of this.​

Wouldn't it be nice if there were that many Will Smiths instead? Sigh.

But this morning, a blue funk kind of fell over me and carried with me inside the parks. Now I felt like I was just going through the motions without any of the enthusiasm that goes with it. I was missing my family so much that it was starting to show on my face. I just wanted to squeeze Patrick, kiss his face, and sniff his head. I majorly missed Dan’s potty humor and uncomfortably long hugs.

Aww...so how many days of joyful solitude were there before the blue funk kicked in? That wasn't a snarky comment, I've just lost track of what day we're actually on.

“Such a sweet little boy you have there,” I say. The parents smile, thank me, and go on their way. But part of me wants to follow them all around the park. I want to see Disney through his eyes now.

I'm often tempted to just "borrow" a little one to take to WDW with me. I still remember when dd was 5 and saw the Main Street Electrical Parade for the very first time. She had that wide eyed look of wonder and I think of it every time I hear that music.

. But if you know what it is all about, why spend a hot, humid day walking through this handicap-inaccessible tourist trap?

So there’s twenty minutes of my life I’ll never get back. Thanks a lot, you Swiss Family turds.

Wendy, Wendy, Wendy. Say it isn't so! I love, love, LOVE the Swiss Family Treehouse. It's a perfect little piece of Disney history. Did you not hear the polka music? Did you not see the way the water was moved to the top of the tree? It's a classic, missy!

I had a dream, that NMAmy said she was waiting for Hucifer to come back to finish her trip report. Silly dreams.

I was waiting. I just wasn't sitting right HERE waiting.

Quoting NMAmy: It's the one thing I love best in your trip reports. That and the sarcasm. And the snarkiness. Okay, it's one of the three things I love best about your trip reports.

You told me I was. Guess it was just a cheap ploy to read your TR. Nice. Real nice.

She's so sneaky, our Amy.

It was you AND the snarkiness, Lou. Two great things that go great together.

 

[__disneygirl]

I just love this report more and more as it goes on. Your last chapter is the main reason why I didn't do a trip report on my 2008 solo trip that I affectionately refer to as "The Solo Mess"... at least half of it would have been "I MISS EVERYONE!" I totally know how you felt, it was just too hard seeing all the families together by the end of it. It really is true that while the Disney Magic they so efficiently sell us is real, you bring some of the magic with you in your loved ones, and if that component isn't there, it's just not as good.

I cracked up at your American Flag shorts. I also am not crazy about Dole Whips. I think they are good but not mind bending. I'm not that crazy about pineapple in general and they're just so HUGE and like you said, melty.

 

[SimmerBaggins]

I've seen this thread hovering on the boards for months, and when I saw the "alone and depressed" part of the title, I was like, WHAT? And started reading, between boring parts of a movie and ads, last night. Finally went to sleep after midnight, when the "alone & depressing" part of your story started kicking in, but I couldn't stay awake any longer...and just finished up.

How many of us dream of scampering around the World with no one to hinder us, not realizing that shortly thereafter, loneliness will finally catch up to us? It seems like it would be a short-lived high.

Which is why -- -- so glad that my WDW-crazy BFF and I will be together on my next WDW trip -- no families, no heat-depressed hangers-on, but two middle aged, old high-school buds doing what we used to do as teens -- park frenzy!! ...for only 3 days, so surely there will be no time for family-missing blues... (and I'm not calling you Shirley)

Meanwhile -- what can I say about this thread that hasn't already been said by your many adoring fans? I'm glad I finally found it, and have had a great time reading.

 

[marvali]

There's something to be said for patriotism.

And nothing says it like a nice pair of red, white and blue shorts.........unless it's one of those flag-kinis!

Stop getting us confused.

But it's so easy to do!

I wasn't apologizing.

You said you were apologizing to no one. I just naturally assumed you meant me....

What happens in the bedroom...is none of yo bizness.

Depends on the bedroom!

Listen, I think I'm hilarious. It's the people around me who disagree.

Hey, you always have us laughing. Now the real question is why?

I'm just ignoring the yanking comment from your Will Smith installment because...well, everyone else beat me to it.

You can never get too much of a good thing!

Hooray is right! Maybe when you finish this trip report next summer, you could start right in on a fake trip report that would include these kind of entries. Because I would totally love that.

You mean this ISN'T the fake one???

It was you AND the snarkiness, Lou. Two great things that go great together.

Kinda like redbugs and a campout...

Meanwhile -- what can I say about this thread that hasn't already been said by your many adoring fans? I'm glad I finally found it, and have had a great time reading.

You ARE new around here.......adoring fans???

 

[glennbo123]

You ARE new around here.......adoring fans???

Speak for yourself Marv...I'm a fan and stalker.

 

[marvali]

Speak for yourself Marv...I'm a fan and stalker.

Oh, that's something completely different! Never mind!

 

[norybell]

Quoting hucifer
Okay, not really. Mom always said, "There are no stupid questions. Just stupid people."

She was always so wise, that Mom of ours.

You two are sisters?

Yes, hucifer and I are totally sisters. Long-lost sisters -- we discovered each other last year through our current TRs. Just imagine the awkward conversations that caused with our mom!

And hucifer, next time you text me from the MK train, try not to be such a downer, OK? I mean, sure, I'm always there for you and stuff, but sheesh, I had to go back to work after. It's not like I could go relax on a bench in Tomorrowland, or anything.

(Seriously, I hope your day got better! We don't want solo trips getting a bad rap, do we?)

 

[hucifer]

Yer....yer brain has the....shell on it.

What's that?

Sorry, guys, I know I'm quoting stuff from like 5 pages ago and you're all like, "Jeez, this is SO two weeks ago!" but some of the comments were too good to pass by without replying.

It's all good!

You two are sisters?

Separated at birth. I took one look at her self-portrait and thought, "By golly that's ME."

Hey, I'm right here. Quit dissing New Mexico.

Your ride sucks.

I'm actually forced to agree with Lou on this one.

Careful.

Here I am! Yeah, I knew about the bridge but in my haste to catch up, I forgot to mock hucifer. I must hang my head in shame that I missed such an opportunity.

I fully expected a tongue-lashing from you. Or keyboard-lashing, I guess.

I'd never abandon you. I just didn't realize we were done with the hiatus until you poked me.

I'm done!

With no photographic evidence to the contrary, I'm having difficulty believing that you've actually given up the security of that thing. Although I do see the difficulty in proving that you DIDN'T have a fanny pack with you. I just have a hard time imagining the most vehement defender of the fannypack letting it go if there was no one to see her using it.

How do you prove a negative? You can't.

I'm just ignoring the yanking comment from your Will Smith installment because...well, everyone else beat me to it.

Hooray is right! Maybe when you finish this trip report next summer, you could start right in on a fake trip report that would include these kind of entries. Because I would totally love that.

ACTUALLY, I have two segments left. So I'll be done by Christmas.

It must be much better than I remember.

Or it was a REALLY busy day.

And we must obey the law...I mean the guide.

The guide never let me down.

Excellent use of your word of the day calendar!

You noticed. Thanks.

Wouldn't it be nice if there were that many Will Smiths instead? Sigh.

Ooh, Mama like that idea.

Aww...so how many days of joyful solitude were there before the blue funk kicked in? That wasn't a snarky comment, I've just lost track of what day we're actually on.

The funk happened on my last park day, which was....now darn, I've forgotten what day I'm on too. That's embarrasing.

I'm often tempted to just "borrow" a little one to take to WDW with me. I still remember when dd was 5 and saw the Main Street Electrical Parade for the very first time. She had that wide eyed look of wonder and I think of it every time I hear that music.

So...you'll see MSEP but you're too good for Spectromagic?

Wendy, Wendy, Wendy. Say it isn't so! I love, love, LOVE the Swiss Family Treehouse. It's a perfect little piece of Disney history. Did you not hear the polka music? Did you not see the way the water was moved to the top of the tree? It's a classic, missy!

You can keep your classic. And your New Mexican ride.

It was you AND the snarkiness, Lou. Two great things that go great together.

I always thought they were one of the same.

I just love this report more and more as it goes on. Your last chapter is the main reason why I didn't do a trip report on my 2008 solo trip that I affectionately refer to as "The Solo Mess"... at least half of it would have been "I MISS EVERYONE!" I totally know how you felt, it was just too hard seeing all the families together by the end of it. It really is true that while the Disney Magic they so efficiently sell us is real, you bring some of the magic with you in your loved ones, and if that component isn't there, it's just not as good.

I think most solo folks agree with me that it's great to do short-term. It's wonderful to do exactly what you want and when. But 3-4 days is usually the max amount of time. By day 4-5, you're missing your family terribly.

I cracked up at your American Flag shorts. I also am not crazy about Dole Whips. I think they are good but not mind bending. I'm not that crazy about pineapple in general and they're just so HUGE and like you said, melty.

I love pineapple. Dole whips? Not so much.

I've seen this thread hovering on the boards for months, and when I saw the "alone and depressed" part of the title, I was like, WHAT? And started reading, between boring parts of a movie and ads, last night. Finally went to sleep after midnight, when the "alone & depressing" part of your story started kicking in, but I couldn't stay awake any longer...and just finished up.

How many of us dream of scampering around the World with no one to hinder us, not realizing that shortly thereafter, loneliness will finally catch up to us? It seems like it would be a short-lived high.

Welcome SimmerBaggins!

"Short-lived high" is a great way to put it. I was all loving on WDW for several days, but this day was IT for me. I was done and ready to pack it up.

Which is why -- -- so glad that my WDW-crazy BFF and I will be together on my next WDW trip -- no families, no heat-depressed hangers-on, but two middle aged, old high-school buds doing what we used to do as teens -- park frenzy!! ...for only 3 days, so surely there will be no time for family-missing blues...

Sounds like fun!

(and I'm not calling you Shirley)

Oh good.

Meanwhile -- what can I say about this thread that hasn't already been said by your many adoring fans? I'm glad I finally found it, and have had a great time reading.

I'm glad you are enjoying it...and writing about it. I am almost finished!

And nothing says it like a nice pair of red, white and blue shorts.........unless it's one of those flag-kinis!

Gotta love flag-kinis.

Depends on the bedroom!

I never kiss and tell. Usually. I usually don't kiss and tell.

Hey, you always have us laughing. Now the real question is why?

Because I'm amusing?

You mean this ISN'T the fake one???

I don't think it is...I remember most of what I wrote.

You ARE new around here.......adoring fans???

You adore and you know it!

Speak for yourself Marv...I'm a fan and stalker.

And you're the best stalker ever!

Yes, hucifer and I are totally sisters. Long-lost sisters -- we discovered each other last year through our current TRs. Just imagine the awkward conversations that caused with our mom!

She had some 'splaining to do.

And hucifer, next time you text me from the MK train, try not to be such a downer, OK? I mean, sure, I'm always there for you and stuff, but sheesh, I had to go back to work after. It's not like I could go relax on a bench in Tomorrowland, or anything.

Sorry about that. But dang, you had me giggling. You can text like no one!

(Seriously, I hope your day got better! We don't want solo trips getting a bad rap, do we?)

Nope. But I cannot say it got any better. I'll just post another segment...

 

[hucifer]

This photo has nothing to do with anything. I just thought it was pretty cool.​

I drag my American Flag shorts and deflated enthusiasm out of the park. I walk to the Contemporary Resort for the final reservation of my trip.

On my way to the Contemporary, this is what I see. How come I don't have legs like that?

Oh, that's right.​

At least here’s something to look forward to…food. Giddy up.

I find a bathroom next to the Wave on the first floor of the Contemporary. I reach into the blue bag that’s been gradually dyeing my shorts all day and pull out a dress. Now that’s class, folks. Dress-In-A-Bag. It’s even better than Soap-On-A-Rope. Speaking of which, remember those? Who thought that was a good idea? Is it because you could hang them over the shower spout without losing it? Hang it on your wrist or your – oops, need to censor myself. Does anyone really find any value with these soaps?

So I whip out my Dress-In-A-Bag and change in the bathroom. And just to class it up even more, I keep my walking sandals on. I am stylin’, baby! But I am fanny pack-less today, and the dress is relatively wrinkle-free, so therefore I am appropriate enough for my California Grill reservation (unless anyone should decide to look below the ankles). Considering my rocking body, that is unlikely to happen.

I take the escalators up a few floors. Inhale deeply. Exhale. What is that amazing smell? I don’t know about you folks, but I love how the fourth floor of this resort smells. They must pump chocolate scent into the air or something, but it smells amazing. I hope that smell never changes because in twenty years I want to remember it just like it is right now.

I find the hostess podium and announce my presence. Voila, there is my reservation. No faking going on here, no sir. I legally obtained that table, thank you very much.

My table is right against the window. It’s a 5:55 reservation, but I arrive early as usual, so there will be no Electrical Water Parade tonight, and certainly no fireworks in my immediate future. But I am ready for some vegetarian fare, so hook me up, California Grill waitress person.

I decide to splurge and get one of those flatbreads. I took a picture of it with my cell and sent it to Dan. If I can’t be with the man, I may as well send him my love. And a picture of my appetizer.

Dear Dan, wish you were here to help me devour this puppy.​

Then I dive in and enjoy as much as I could before dinner arrives.

Talker Tim texts me and says he can meet me after dinner. Then he says he can meet me at the restaurant, and before I can text back to tell him that they would never allow the likes of him up without a reservation, he’s standing at my table and grinning at me. He plops down across from me and watches me eat the rest of my dinner. That’s not awkward or anything.

Dinner is some sort of – surprise! – pasta and veggie plate. It is very good, admittedly, but definitely pales in comparison with my hairy pasta surprise at the Flying Fish.

A lot of weird-looking stuff here.​

I admit to Tim The Talker that I’m Disneyed out, who suggests that I let him chauffer me around so I can see a different side of Orlando. Not only does an evening of UnDisney sound good, having some company sounds even better. So I pay my meal and head downstairs with him.

He drives me to the Gaylord Palms, a resort outside of WDW. He’s been telling me about this resort for years, but I’ve never seen it before. If you aren’t familiar either, you should Google it. It’s one of the largest resorts I’ve ever seen, and it has this enormous glass ceiling. It is well themed. They have weekly alligator feedings and everything. Tim and Marie love the place, and while it is rather impressive, it feels…I don’t know…cold. Impersonal. Odd. I felt like I needed to leave. It’s a place I never want to stay in.

After exploring the resort for twenty minutes, we walk outside and head back to the car. Along the way we meet Willy, the very cantankerous caterpillar. Or Willy, the killer caterpillar. You may think my moniker is a bit over-the-top, but heed these words, my friends…that little worm was not as he appeared. This is no ordinary caterpillar, folks. Step aside for the meanest, baddest caterpillar this side of the Mississippi. The only thing I can say is thank goodness we can outrun the beast.

Willy is walking on the sidewalk toward his own destination until we come along. My guess is that he wasn’t cantankerous until we show up. He’s crawling toward Tim’s car. I doubt that Tim’s car is his actual destination, but that’s the direction he’s headed. Anyway, since we’re on our way to the car ourselves, we discover him moving and grooving on the sidewalk. We approach him, stop, and admire the furry red guy. I take some pictures. Everything is nice and sweet.

And then Tim has this brilliant idea. He stomps his foot on the sidewalk, right in front of the little guy. Not to squish him, and not to scare him, but to…well, you know, I’m not really sure why he did that. Maybe he did it to instigate him. Anything is possible, I guess. Maybe Tim will show up here and explain himself and why he felt the need to mess with this killer caterpillar.

Well. Willy is having none of this. He’s got places to go, and no one – no matter how large – is going to mess with him today. So what does he do? Does he spit in Tim’s direction? Give him the middle leg? Does he leap on Tim’s foot and take a big bite out of it? Hell no. Willy turns his aggression out on me. Yes, ME. He is full-out mad now. Willy turns away from Tim and instead of crawling, he’s hauling butt. Scurrying. Running, even. Toward me. Now, I know you’re thinking, “Surely caterpillars can’t run, Hucifer.” But in caterpillar terms, this dude was running. He wasn’t going at the snail’s pace like he was when we first discovered him. He was booking. And don’t call me Shirley.

So now you’re thinking, “Surely he wasn’t interested in attacking you, perhaps he just changed his direction.” Which is exactly what I thought because, hey, I’m not the one who stomped my big ugly foot at him. So I move ninety degrees around Willy. And that little booger turns his body and again sprints in my direction. Just to be sure I’m not seeing things, I change positions again. And sure enough, Willy turns for me again…he is coming right at me. He is mad. He had a horrible day and clearly wants to take all of his aggression out on me. And please stop calling me Shirley. It’s getting really irritating.

I’m all, “HE’S AFTER ME!”grabbing Tim by the collar and throwing him on the sidewalk between me and Willy. I dive for Tim’s car. It’s only fair, I figure, that Willy should have to get through the real instigator before coming for me. Am I guilty by association? Perhaps. But that doesn’t mean I should be first in his revenge checklist. The last thing I see as I turn my head back one last time is Willy devouring Tim’s intestines as Tim struggles to hang onto life during his losing battle between man and beast. As I leapt into his car for a mad getaway, I remember shouting a promise to make a donation to the Human Fund in his name.

Beware of Willy, the caterpillar of death.​

Okay, enough about Willy the Killer Caterpillar. I may have exaggerated that last part a little. I do remember that Tim didn’t die, so that was good.

After Tim and I narrowly escape the jaws of a killer furry red worm, we hop in his car and he drives toward Celebration. Dusk is setting in, and the sun slowly sinks behind the horizon. At least, I’m guessing that it sank because I really couldn’t see the horizon with that big resort in my way. I think it took about ten or fifteen minutes to drive to Celebration. It is a quaint little town, but nothing spectacular.

After a semi-quick tour around the town, I have enough touring in my system. I ask Tim to drive me back to the resort so I can sleep and he can go back to his condo and tend to his wounds.



Coming Up: Day 9: The Good-bye girl

 

[NMAmy]

I walk back to use my FastPass for Splash Mountain and breathe in a little musty dishrag. Poncho be damned, that stupid thing didn’t do anything to keep me dry. I don’t know the physics involved to incur a watery end versus not, but we had one. A huge wave of green chlorinated stink water engulfed our vessel and covered us in filthy, stinky wetness. On the way down the great big hill, my poncho hood blew off, so my hair was saturated with that smelly crap. Nice.

You make it sound so lovely--I can hardly wait to ride it again. I don't know why you bother with a poncho, I managed to stay dry using my light cardigan. The trick is to put it over your face and the top of your head--not your back like a poncho.

Here they come...walking down the street...they wear the funniest colors...in the Florida heat.
"Hey! Hey! We're Brazilians! And people say that we're too loud. But we're too busy marching...trying not to blend with the crowd."[/CENTER]

They certainly are difficult to find with those hunter orange shirts, aren't they?

Actually, another veggie burger was calling me. I mean, it’s been two whole days since my last one and darn if that corn-filled patty wasn’t calling my name. I trek back to Ray’s, order a corn burger (with extra corn), and skip on to the toppings bar. For more corn.

Yum.

So. Here we are. Just me and you, drippy yellow Dole Whip. I take a spoonful and…wait for it….wait for it…um…ew. Too sweet. Not doing anything for me. I take another spoonful, but nope. Still not working for me.

I'm in total agreement on this one. Blech. But, hey, it's one thing we don't have to wait in line for, right?

I hope like hell it doesn’t drip on my American Flag shorts because yellow will simply ruin the whole patriotic theme I’ve got going on down there.

You have a theme going on down there? Is the theme, "Pack a Tide to Go stick"?

By now, the week of Disney is hitting me hard physically.

About this time, I'd have been headed to the hotel for a nap. I applaud your persistance.

She is one nasty woman. I feel so bad for her kids. There is no way I would be around this negativity for as long as I had to be, and when the train finally rolls into the station, I made sure to sit in a completely different car. I remember giving the children one last sympathetic look before boarding my car. Poor kids.

See, everybody needed a nap.

The cast member could be my son, he’s so young. I cannot believe I just frigging typed that. I guess the closer you approach forty, the more you realize that you’re no longer the young sexy thang you once were. It’s so depressing.

Wait until you're pushing 50 as my dd so charmingly puts it. I swear, I went to the hospital with my mom and the doctors at the ER look like they're in elementary school. They certainly shouldn't be out so late on a school night.

But I digress. So the young whippersnapper greets me Jeez, way to be observant all these years, girl. Between this and the Splash Mountain bridge, what else have I missed?

Do we need to makeyou a list? Because there was a lot of stuff.

All that joy and freedom I was feeling on the first day…all that emotion that I was wearing on my sleeve for others to see…it was gone. Someone definitely popped a hole in my Mickey balloon, and it was deflating rather quickly. Instead of euphoria, I am feeling annoyed. Instead of feeling the love, I’m feeling impatient. Instead of running to the next attraction, I want to run to my family. I miss them so much that I don’t even have the energy to explore the park anymore. It is definitely time to leave.

Awww...I know you're over it by now but I still feel the need to offer a hug.

I’ve been doing a lot of sitting today. Nothing is motivating me to move anymore. Which isn’t especially effective for burning all the calories I’ve been eating today.

Well, sure, a bunch of corn and a bite of Dole Whip. That requires a lot of working out.

Another laughs. “Well, of course it’s open, silly. They wouldn’t close Space Mountain!”

And the group walks away.

Now I have something to giggle about.

Mocking people always cheers me up, too.

I decide to hit one more ride before leaving for the day. Teacups.

Well, it might help you get rid of those corn calories. I feel compelled to say that binging and purging is always a bad idea.

And then eventually I hope that the ride would just end because I feel like I don’t belong here.

I always feel this way after the teacups.

So sorry you were missing your family, pal. It's not a real hucifer trip report until you make me cry, is it?

 

[mmeb144]

Beware of Willy, the caterpillar of death.​

And who says that there is no creative writing on the Dis? I loved your story about Willy, caterpillar of death.

 

[glennbo123]

On my way to the Contemporary, this is what I see. How come I don't have legs like that?​

Oh, don't talk like that! You do have legs like that. Legs just like that guy in the blue shorts walking in front of those young people.

Oh, that's right.​

Ba-zing-a! Nice one.

At least here’s something to look forward to…food. Giddy up.

Hilarious!

Now that’s class, folks. Dress-In-A-Bag.

That's the same way that Jacqueline Kennedy and Lady Di used to change for dinner.

It’s even better than Soap-On-A-Rope. Speaking of which, remember those? Who thought that was a good idea? Is it because you could hang them over the shower spout without losing it? Hang it on your wrist or your – oops, need to censor myself. Does anyone really find any value with these soaps?

Hello?! Prison showers.

I find the hostess podium and announce my presence. Voila, there is my reservation. No faking going on here, no sir. I legally obtained that table, thank you very much.

Dan's assistant came through this time. Darn temps.

As I leapt into his car for a mad getaway, I remember shouting a promise to make a donation to the Human Fund in his name.

I did the same thing for my nephew for Festivus a couple of years ago.

LOVED the caterpillar story by the way!

 

[norybell]

This photo has nothing to do with anything. I just thought it was pretty cool.​

It is!

On my way to the Contemporary, this is what I see. How come I don't have legs like that?​

Because you aren't sixteen. Which is a good thing, right?

I find a bathroom next to the Wave on the first floor of the Contemporary. I reach into the blue bag that’s been gradually dyeing my shorts all day and pull out a dress. Now that’s class, folks. Dress-In-A-Bag.

Someone should totally run with this. A dress you can roll up and carry in your purse like those little portable tote bags. I smell millions here, people!

Dear Dan, wish you were here to help me devour this puppy.​

Oh my, that looks yummy. You are making me rethink my upcoming ADRs. I've never been to CG, and really want to, but that whole credit card confirmation thing always talks me out of it...

He plops down across from me and watches me eat the rest of my dinner. That’s not awkward or anything.

Did you chew with your mouth open? Because that's both riveting and disgusting, at the same time.

Beware of Willy, the caterpillar of death.​

That is HORRIFYING. Like, I'm going to have nightmares tonight. About Willy. And I just finished reading The Hunger Games trilogy, which is chock-full of vivid, violent deaths in a dystopian-nightmare sort of world. Yet it will be a caterpillar that's haunting my nightmares, seriously. ​

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Beware of Willy, the caterpillar of death.​

Willy reminds me of the caterpillar from that movie Labyrinth, only less blue, more red and sans sweet British accent.

Willy does NOT look like he's saying, "Come inside and meet the missus," or "Come inside and have a nice cup of tea."

And now that I'm done comparing your deranged insect stalker to a teensy Henson puppet a la an awesome 80's movie I'ma go back to work.

​

 

[mmeb144]

And I just finished reading The Hunger Games trilogy, which is chock-full of vivid, violent deaths in a dystopian-nightmare sort of world. Yet it will be a caterpillar that's haunting my nightmares, seriously.

So, totally off topic, did you like the Hunger Games trilogy? I LOVED them. I'm really sorry it ended like it did, but war is like that.

 

[1moremile]

First time TR poster here! Had to break out of lurkdom to tell you how much I enjoy reading your TR's! Somehow I found your previous one and read it ALL the way through, even though there were no pictures! You have a wonderful way with words and IMHO, a great sense of humor.

I've been reading several TR's and have found wonderful ideas for photo ops, food reviews, park tips and tricks, etc. DH and I are going on the 30th of this month for the wine and dine half marathon. Even though we've been several times, I now have ADR's (never even thought about them before) and will have an agenda in place to make the most of our time there.

Thanks to ALL of you for sharing your awesome experiences!

(just adding the banana cause I like it)

 

[marvali]

This photo has nothing to do with anything. I just thought it was pretty cool.​

If that one on the right was wearing yellow, I could envision a new Disney version of the game Sorry! Well, this is a Hucifer TR, so maybe TROUBLE would be more appropriate.

On my way to the Contemporary, this is what I see. How come I don't have legs like that?​

Oh, don't talk like that! You do have legs like that. Legs just like that guy in the blue shorts walking in front of those young people.

Dang, I hate it when Glenn beats me to the good responses!

It’s even better than Soap-On-A-Rope. Speaking of which, remember those? Who thought that was a good idea? Is it because you could hang them over the shower spout without losing it? Hang it on your wrist or your – oops, need to censor myself.

Those things were too long for that.....or was that wide?

So I whip out my Dress-In-A-Bag and change in the bathroom. And just to class it up even more, I keep my walking sandals on.

So I guess you forgot your Pumps-In-A-Bag.....

Considering my rocking body, that is unlikely to happen.

So many responses, I don't even know where to start...

Talker Tim texts me and says he can meet me after dinner. Then he says he can meet me at the restaurant, and before I can text back to tell him that they would never allow the likes of him up without a reservation, he’s standing at my table and grinning at me.

This guy makes Russell look like a, um, Glenn!

You may think my moniker is a bit over-the-top, but heed these words, my friends…that little worm was not as he appeared. This is no ordinary caterpillar, folks. Step aside for the meanest, baddest caterpillar this side of the Mississippi.

Wimp!

So what does he do? Does he spit in Tim’s direction? Give him the middle leg? Does he leap on Tim’s foot and take a big bite out of it? Hell no. Willy turns his aggression out on me. Yes, ME.

That's what you get for taking that last ADR at Cali Grill, and then having the gall to order Willy's favorite veggie plate!

Okay, enough about Willy the Killer Caterpillar. I may have exaggerated that last part a little.

News flash!

Mocking people always cheers me up, too.

I feel better already! ​

 

[walkdmc]

I'm so happy I found this thread again! Thanks to the bumper!
I first read this TR when I joined the Disboards several months ago, before I knew about subscribing. Can't wait to catch up where I left off.

 

[hucifer]

Amy, not sure if you noticed, but I took your suggestion (begging, actually) and did not update over Labor Day weekend. And you're STILL behind!

You make it sound so lovely--I can hardly wait to ride it again. I don't know why you bother with a poncho, I managed to stay dry using my light cardigan. The trick is to put it over your face and the top of your head--not your back like a poncho.

Or...OR...I could wear my poncho backwards. It might be a little hard to breathe, but I would be dry.

They certainly are difficult to find with those hunter orange shirts, aren't they?

I'm surprised you saw them at all. They really do blend.

Yum.

I know you find this impossible to believe, but it was delicious.

I'm in total agreement on this one. Blech. But, hey, it's one thing we don't have to wait in line for, right?

You have a theme going on down there? Is the theme, "Pack a Tide to Go stick"?

Okay, that made me

About this time, I'd have been headed to the hotel for a nap. I applaud your persistance.

Dan always says, "I can't handle your vacations."

See, everybody needed a nap.

She needed more than a nap. She needed a slap.

Wait until you're pushing 50 as my dd so charmingly puts it. I swear, I went to the hospital with my mom and the doctors at the ER look like they're in elementary school. They certainly shouldn't be out so late on a school night.

When did we get so old? It was like, all of a sudden and stuff.

Do we need to makeyou a list? Because there was a lot of stuff.

If you've got one compiled, sure.

Awww...I know you're over it by now but I still feel the need to offer a hug.

Thanks, girl.

Mocking people always cheers me up, too.

It's what I live for, really.

Well, it might help you get rid of those corn calories. I feel compelled to say that binging and purging is always a bad idea.

Right. The acidity from the vomit really destroys the lining in the esophagus.

I always feel this way after the teacups.

I LIKE the teacups. Just not alone, apparently.

So sorry you were missing your family, pal. It's not a real hucifer trip report until you make me cry, is it?

Not my intent! I was just a little lonely.

And who says that there is no creative writing on the Dis? I loved your story about Willy, caterpillar of death.

Thanks mmeb. It was terrifying reliving it, however.

Oh, don't talk like that! You do have legs like that. Legs just like that guy in the blue shorts walking in front of those young people.

Gosh you say the nicest things, Glenn.
I hear corn can really add bulk to legs. This confirms it.

That's the same way that Jacqueline Kennedy and Lady Di used to change for dinner.

So, I'm in the same category as royalty?

Hello?! Prison showers.

I doubt they have Rope-On-A-Soap in prison. Those clever guys would probably make a shank out of it or something.

Dan's assistant came through this time. Darn temps.

It's about time she did! We were ready to fire her.

I did the same thing for my nephew for Festivus a couple of years ago.

It's my favorite time of the year.

LOVED the caterpillar story by the way!

This means a lot coming from you.

Because you aren't sixteen. Which is a good thing, right?

If you say so.

Come to think of it, I don't think I had legs like that when I was sixteen, either.

Someone should totally run with this. A dress you can roll up and carry in your purse like those little portable tote bags. I smell millions here, people!

I smell it too! It has potential.

Oh my, that looks yummy. You are making me rethink my upcoming ADRs. I've never been to CG, and really want to, but that whole credit card confirmation thing always talks me out of it...

CG is an amazing restaurant, Nory. You really should give it a try one of these days.

Did you chew with your mouth open? Because that's both riveting and disgusting, at the same time.

No, mama taught us better than that.

That is HORRIFYING. Like, I'm going to have nightmares tonight. About Willy. And I just finished reading The Hunger Games trilogy, which is chock-full of vivid, violent deaths in a dystopian-nightmare sort of world. Yet it will be a caterpillar that's haunting my nightmares, seriously.

Okay, I'm not sure what the Hunger Games is all about, but I have to agree about the terror that was Willy.

[shudder]

Willy reminds me of the caterpillar from that movie Labyrinth, only less blue, more red and sans sweet British accent.

Willy does NOT look like he's saying, "Come inside and meet the missus," or "Come inside and have a nice cup of tea."

And now that I'm done comparing your deranged insect stalker to a teensy Henson puppet a la an awesome 80's movie I'ma go back to work.

Hmmm...I never saw Labyrinth. But I like the idea of giving Willy a British accent. It makes him seem so...sophisticated...as well as evil.

So, totally off topic, did you like the Hunger Games trilogy? I LOVED them. I'm really sorry it ended like it did, but war is like that.

So this Hunger thing isn't just a part of Nory's imagination?

First time TR poster here! Had to break out of lurkdom to tell you how much I enjoy reading your TR's! Somehow I found your previous one and read it ALL the way through, even though there were no pictures! You have a wonderful way with words and IMHO, a great sense of humor.

Well thanks a lot, moremile! What a nice thing to say. I'm glad you came out of lurkdom and that you enjoyed the last TR too...that was a labor of love, that one. Here's your big banana welcome...

I've been reading several TR's and have found wonderful ideas for photo ops, food reviews, park tips and tricks, etc. DH and I are going on the 30th of this month for the wine and dine half marathon. Even though we've been several times, I now have ADR's (never even thought about them before) and will have an agenda in place to make the most of our time there.

Thanks to ALL of you for sharing your awesome experiences!

(just adding the banana cause I like it)

I like the banana too.
Trip reports are a great way to get ideas, for sure. I cannot believe you haven't done ADRs before! OMG!

If that one on the right was wearing yellow, I could envision a new Disney version of the game Sorry! Well, this is a Hucifer TR, so maybe TROUBLE would be more appropriate.

I've got no argument there.

Dang, I hate it when Glenn beats me to the good responses!

You have to wake up pretty early to beat ol' Glennbo.

So I guess you forgot your Pumps-In-A-Bag.....

You're right. Where the heck were you when I needed you?

This guy makes Russell look like a, um, Glenn!

Glenn is no pussycat, Marv. Don't kid yourself.

Wimp!

Mock if you will. But this was no ordinary caterpillar.

News flash!

I said "may have." Then again, maybe I didn't.

I feel better already!

This is a specialty of yours.

I'm so happy I found this thread again! Thanks to the bumper!
I first read this TR when I joined the Disboards several months ago, before I knew about subscribing. Can't wait to catch up where I left off.

Hey walkdmc! I love your screen name. Welcome to the end of my TR!

When I read your reply I thought, "how long HAVE I been dragging this puppy out?" And then I thought, "Forever."

It's almost done. I have one segment left. Promise.