How well do you know your SIL and BIL's?

[txSleepingBeauty]

I adore my one actual sister in law. I'm the only girl in my family, so it was nice to finally have a "sister." I've often told her that if she and my brother ever get divorced, I'm going with her. We hung out together a lot before the kids came along, now not quite as much.

My other "sister in law" (technically just my brother's on again/off again girlfriend, mother of my nephew) I cannot stand. We used to be friends, until she turned into a psychopath. We no longer speak to each other.

 

[Sabeking]

OP it sounds like all of you are ok with the current state of things; so if it's not broken you don't have to fix it. I have five SIL's. I am close to some; not at all to others and there are no hard feelings. We just have different interests. I also think like any relationship things change. I was not close to one SIL but when my mom (her MIL) got sick we had more of an opportunity to get to know each other. We still are not close but I appreciate her help with family matters. At least there is no drama, right??

 

[minkydog]

I just realized this Thanksgiving I have been with my DH for 12 years, married for 7 and honestly I barley know his 2 sisters. I can tell you a bit about each of them but I don't think I have ever gone out to lunch alone with them or shopped alone with them. They do live in different states, but any messages are always relayed by DH. I could tell you a little about my SIL's husband, like 2 things and they have been married 8 years.

Is this unusual? Am I mean/horrible? To be honest, neither party seems all that interested in getting to know the other..

I'd have to say I don't know mine all that well. I have 4 siblings in 4 different states, stretching from North Carolina to Washington state. We rarely get to see each other or do things together, so that doesn't lend itself to developing close relationships with our in-laws. Not that I'm all that upset about it. Two of my sisters are married to men that I can barely stand, so it's no loss to me that we never get to see each other.

 

[antmaril]

I have known my late husband's brother since he was 12 years old (he is 58). He is like a brother to me. I know him very well. He has been married to his second wife for eight years. She and I get along very well, but I can't really say I know her well.

My sister has been married and divorced three times.

 

[runsandjumps]

I hardly know my BIL's or their spouses. Although they live in another country, so that is a challenge. However, if I did live in that country we would probably know everything about each other seeing as they all live in one giant house together. I almost wish I could get to know them better, but not at the cost of living in the same place as all of them. LOL

 

[Andtototoo]

I don't know them well and I'm fine with that. One of them is a major drama queen. Major. I try and keep totally out of her orbit. The others have zero interest in anything that isn't part of daily life. They can't make any small talk and have no interest in anything outside of their small town. Even though they've been to WDW multiple times, they won't even talk about that. So, since I'm not in their daily life, I am invisible to them. In fact, the last time we visited, they invited a horde of their small town friends over and never spoke to us the entire time we were visiting.

 

[carrie1626]

I love my husband's family very much. They are all very nice people and there isn't "drama". Get togethers are always a good time.

But my husband is #5/6 and really isn't "close" to any of them. We all see each other 2 or 3 times a year but because of distance there has never been an opportunity for socializing just for fun.

I always wished I had the IL thing like some friends of mine have but on the flip side I also have friends that can't the speak the names of their inlaws.

 

[WowLookAtThat]

One SIL is a nice woman. We talk about parties and how to plan the events, swap recipes and just joke around.

My other SIL can be a cow sometimes.She says some pretty mean things but I chalk it up to a lack of tact and not because she is outwardly trying to be mean but I wish she was less shrill in voicing her dislike to something.If you like something, automatically she doesn't...until one of her friends say they like the same thing and then she LOVES it.

 

[diznee25]

OP, what a great topic. That's something I've always wondered as well.

DH and I have been married almost 9 years. Majority of those years, we always lived an hour away from SILs, and then eventually moved out of state. Now we live very close...maybe 10 minutes from my SIL's.

They were both in my wedding, and we always see them for major holidays/events. Even though we live just minutes away, I still don't see them that often.

Once in a blue moon we'll go shopping, or DH and I will babysit our nephews, but that's about it. Both SILs are married, and to bring that into topic, DH isn't close to BILs. He visits with them during family gatherings, but doesn't really have anything in common with them either.

diznee25

 

[donac]

I don't know my dh's sisters too well. Three are in the area. ONe has never wanted to be involved with us. If we are at a party the only thing she will ask me is how are my folks. I don't even think she knows what I teach. ONe sister is having healthy problems and doesn't talk much. The youngest we were pretty close to while she was going to college but we don't see her much any more.

I don't get together with a my brother and 2 of my sisters. But I am pretty close to my twin sister and her family and my youngest sister. We all went to DW together in Aug.

 

[castmemberb4]

The SIL who was the wife on DHs brother I got to know much better after they divorced! I like her so much better now that she's not with him and I don't like his new wife at all.
As for my side of the family one DB has been married and divorced several times and has been single for many years now. The other DB lost his beloved wife who had been my "sister" for 34 years, I was very close to her. She was from a big family and I grew up with her younger siblings and older nieces and nephews. Even now we have a yearly reunion that still includes both families. Now he's engaged to a wonderful woman whom I love and know will be a big part of our family.

 

[momof1princess]

i've never spent more than 4-5 days with my DSIL and her DH, every few years. we live in NE alabama, and they live in san antonio, tx. they both have very important jobs (PhD's in chemistry) and travel a lot, so they only get to come home every 3-5 years.

now my DB's wife....i just wish i didn't know her at all.

 

[MM27]

My brother and sil have been married for 18 years now and I probably know her better than I know my own sister, who is very private about things.

 

[Mokat76]

I know my BIL pretty well. He's a great guy.

My younger brother's second wife not so much. I like her well enough, but we don't see each other very often so I can't really say I know her well.

Now my older brother's widow is a whole different story. We're more like sisters than SILs. I don't live too close to her, either, but we keep in touch. We always got along, but when my brother was so ill, I was there to keep things on an even keel. We grew closer than ever. She's remarried now to a man who is eerily like my brother. He's a quirky guy, but I think he's pretty great. My SIL loves him and that's enough for me.

 

[luvgoing2disney]

Reading some of these responses makes me realize again how lucky I am. My SIL and I get along very well, in fact she considers me the brother she never had and she is my sister that I never had. I get along really great with all of my in-laws and we ususlly take vacations together. And this after 28 years of marriage.

Now my former BIL we thought we knew, but after his affair and the divorce I found that I did not know him at all. IAnd what I do know I don't like.

 

[soccerdad72]

My wife only has one brother and we only live about 20 minutes from him, so I've known him for 20+ years now. On my side of the family, I know my two siblings' spouses fairly well, even though we may not necessarily get along that great.