How To Tell The Kids We Might Have To Cancel?

[Jasminetigger]

I need help from those that have had to cancel before. We have a trip planned for the end of this month. It was to be our 1st stay at the Yacht Club and the kids were real excited about SAB so was DH. It was also to be our 1st Pirates and Princess Party.

I have 2 family members who are having financial difficulties right now. I feel I need to help them out. Going on this trip would definitely put a strain on us. Even if we could swing it, I would feel bad about going on vacation again, when I have family members in trouble. I feel like I could use our vacation money to help them even more. So that is why I feel the need to cancel. This trip would cost us about $1,000.00. I have a room only booked, so I can cancel up to 5 days ahead of time.

How do you go about telling the kids? My daughters are 9 and 14. They are not spoiled. I am sure they will understand, but it is still going to be hard, especially for my youngest. Should I tell them now or should I wait closer to the trip in case we can go?

Any ideas would be appreciated.

 

[skipperkim]

Maybe you should have them watch Lilo & Stitch movie. Then have a discussion about how "family comes first". I'm sure they'll agree to that concept. Then explain what has happened to the family memebers and that you feel compelled to help them out since "family comes first". But, you might also let them know this gives them time to build up their vacation fund as well for all those souveniers they want.

Maybe, just maybe, once they agree a call to Disney merchandise might be nice to order something for each of them for their postponed trip?

 

[eliza61]

Could you phrase it as maybe a cancellation with a reschedule more than an outright cancellation? Are you expecting to get the money back from your family members? If it's straining your budget now, how will you feel not getting it back at all?
Good luck, that's a tough situation to be in. You sound like a very caring individual to want to help out your family so I think your kids have picked up this great personality too. They'll bounce back.

 

[Jasminetigger]

Maybe you should have them watch Lilo & Stitch movie. Then have a discussion about how "family comes first". I'm sure they'll agree to that concept. Then explain what has happened to the family memebers and that you feel compelled to help them out since "family comes first". But, you might also let them know this gives them time to build up their vacation fund as well for all those souveniers they want.

Maybe, just maybe, once they agree a call to Disney merchandise might be nice to order something for each of them for their postponed trip?

I do like this idea of buying them a little something for a future trip.

My kids do know that family comes first. They are very loving kids. As a matter of fact, they each got out all their change to give to the family members to help out. It was just too preciuos. I just hate having to break their hearts.

 

[rentayenta]

I need help from those that have had to cancel before. We have a trip planned for the end of this month. It was to be our 1st stay at the Yacht Club and the kids were real excited about SAB so was DH. It was also to be our 1st Pirates and Princess Party.

I have 2 family members who are having financial difficulties right now. I feel I need to help them out. Going on this trip would definitely put a strain on us. Even if we could swing it, I would feel bad about going on vacation again, when I have family members in trouble. I feel like I could use our vacation money to help them even more. So that is why I feel the need to cancel. This trip would cost us about $1,000.00. I have a room only booked, so I can cancel up to 5 days ahead of time.

How do you go about telling the kids? My daughters are 9 and 14. They are not spoiled. I am sure they will understand, but it is still going to be hard, especially for my youngest. Should I tell them now or should I wait closer to the trip in case we can go?

Any ideas would be appreciated.

We had to cancel our trip last December and telling the kids was hard. I can tell you that they will follow your lead as far as attitude and disappointment go. I spun it as we have a new home and we need to be there. Our new beautiful home cost money to maintain and we need to take care of that first. We told them that Disney will be there when we can return.

 

[Jasminetigger]

Could you phrase it as maybe a cancellation with a reschedule more than an outright cancellation? Are you expecting to get the money back from your family members? If it's straining your budget now, how will you feel not getting it back at all?
Good luck, that's a tough situation to be in. You sound like a very caring individual to want to help out your family so I think your kids have picked up this great personality too. They'll bounce back.

That is a good idea. Maybe we could try to go in October for MNSSHP. We have never done that yet.

I don't expect to get the money back, at least not for a while. My family members are wonderful people. We are very close. If thye can't pay me back monetarily they will find other ways to pay me back. Like do our yard work so we don't have to do it. Or paint the house. You get the idea.

 

[skipperkim]

I do like this idea of buying them a little something for a future trip.

My kids do know that family comes first. They are very loving kids. As a matter of fact, they each got out all their change to give to the family members to help out. It was just too preciuos. I just hate having to break their hearts.

I never meant to imply that your children weren't loving and caring. I can't imagine that they aren't since you are their mother. But it is too sweet that they got change to help their family.

But I do agree with the other OP that postponing might be a better choice of words. You might be able to just switch the deposit to a new date too. A trip to the Disney store might be a good replacement for now. They always have great sales going. The last time I was there you could get a light chaser like the ones they sell in the park for under $7.

 

[Fast Pass]

Is there a way you could do both? Perhaps stay at a value and what you saved by giving up the deluxe give it to your family members?
I would hate to see anyone have to give up their vacation but I am glad you are putting family first, so many people have forgotten that family comes first.
If you do find you have to cancel don't delay it. Come straight out and explain why and tell them you understand their disappointment but that there will be another time you can go.
Good Luck!

 

[Jasminetigger]

I never meant to imply that your children weren't loving and caring. I can't imagine that they aren't since you are their mother. But it is too sweet that they got change to help their family.

But I do agree with the other OP that postponing might be a better choice of words. You might be able to just switch the deposit to a new date too. A trip to the Disney store might be a good replacement for now. They always have great sales going. The last time I was there you could get a light chaser like the ones they sell in the park for under $7.

Oh and I am so sorry. I never meant to imply that you were implying. I did not think you meant that. Thanks for all your input.

 

[Tess'smom]

Wow Jasminetigger, you are a very sweet person! I would second the comments about re-scheduling rather than cancelling the trip. It would give them something else to look forward to. Maybe taking the kids on a day trip somewhere or doing something special during that vacation time would be nice.

 

[JJ&JSMOM]

We had to cancel our trip in May due to DD4 being sick. She started not feelling well w/temp 4 days prior to when we were to leave. On the 3rd day I took her to the Dr. and they did strep test, etc. That day I started saying little hints to DS 8 that maybe we'd have to cancel because DD4 was sick. Well when he got home from school the day prior to our vacay we had cancelled while he was in school and had a vacation all rescheduled (MNSSHP, most of the dining) . It eased the pain having something already planned and on paper that I could show him & DD4. 4 days later DD4 was better but DD2 was sick so we are so glad we cancelled. If you're not sure when you'll reschedule maybe just sit down with them and talk about when would be a good time, where they'd like to stay, etc. Our kids jumped right back into our routine and didn't really talk about it. I think I was more upset then them. They do ask now because we're getting closer to their trip.

You sound like a very caring individual and I'm sure your kids will be fine- disappointed but fine. Just read your latest post - Wow you have great kids giving their money to help out! Sweet! If you do cancel - it does make the next trip extra special. Good luck to you & your family. Disney will always be there.

 

[ObsessedwiththeMouse]

I don't know...I would never cancel my family trip to help out other family members, BUT, my family isn't real close... (With that being said, my other family members would NEVER help me out either)

Anyway, we had to cancel our December trip last year and it was heartbreaking....for me and my husband. My daughter was barely 5, so she really didn't "remember" that we were supposed to go.

I would definitely keep it as a postponing and not canceling.

Good luck!

 

[spiceycat]

make sure that your family really needs the money badly. and isn't telling you a story to make their part worst that it is.

have been lied to by my family members.

I don't make what they do - but when got told they needed money to able to pay their bills. Well I send it to them for several months. then found out it was going toward a BOAT.

anyway, anytime this person says he needs money now - look back on the past be sure they really, really do.

would hate for you and your family to give up on a vacation that the kids really want - just because someone in your family make up a story.

never, never believe you mother when she says someone needs it worst. my mother lies more than my other relatives.

 

[Jasminetigger]

Thanks everyone for the kind words. Just talking about it ahead of time is going to make it a little bit easier. I will definitely make sure I use the words postpone and re-schedule and not cancel. I will also make sure I have the right attitude, like "rentayenta" said. Kids do pick up on everything.

Spiceycat, my family memebers do really need the money. Luckily I have a close family and know they would not lie to me. At least they never have yet. They didn't even ask me for the money. I offered it. Because I knew they really need it. They have 3 young girls and I did it more for them than anyone else.

 

[cara loves the poly]

You are doing the right thing. Your kids will understand that. It sounds as though they would do it for you too. Family is the most important thing in the world. I'm sure there is a very good reason for you giving them the money. A Disney vacation means absolutely nothing in comparison.

 

[Dis Ohana]

Jasminetigger: My children are almost the same age as yours (12 & 14). We are also very close to our extended family. Up until a few years ago going on vacation, even a small one, was never an option for us. It was a family dream to go to Disneyland, it became a family effort to save and plan for that first trip. There were many disappointments along the way, but when we finally did make our first trip we all were so grateful just to be there.

You got very good advice here on how to approach the subject, absolutely let them know that the trip will happen, just not as originally planned. I know it'll be tough for the kids but it sounds to me like they're like mine -- sure they'll be disappointed, but they will understand that helping family first is the right thing to do. It sounds like you've raised them that way.

 

[Lovinlifesooomuch30]

I think that this will be a wonderful lesson for your children. To be there for your family financially is so much more important than a vacation. I agree with the others in saying that you should phrase it as a rescheduling and not a cancellation. Well good luck either way !!!!

 

[lilyv]

I had a bit of an idea. Would it be possible to plan to do a little local vacation with your kids? It doesn't have to be the exact time, but maybe go to the zoo, or a children's museum, pool, or whatever neat things your town (or one nearby) has. My kids used to think it was really something to have several days in a row when we'd do fun (not expensive at all) activities and call it touring our town.

Disney will still be there, but you could also have a great time exploring nearby in the meantime.

 

[mickey2minnie1]

I would go with the postpone scenerio as well. Family first!

After all how could anyone have a magical time when things are not so magical at home? You can sprinkle some pixie dust on your family and your kids can be apart of that.

Fall is such a great time to go! Less heat, the kids may be happy to have a break and you can surely celebrate the magic knowing that all of you did the right thing.

I would discuss this asap and discuss a future plan for Disney.

 

[Jasminetigger]

I had a bit of an idea. Would it be possible to plan to do a little local vacation with your kids? It doesn't have to be the exact time, but maybe go to the zoo, or a children's museum, pool, or whatever neat things your town (or one nearby) has. My kids used to think it was really something to have several days in a row when we'd do fun (not expensive at all) activities and call it touring our town.

Disney will still be there, but you could also have a great time exploring nearby in the meantime.

lilyv, this is a good idea. There is a city not too far from us called St. Augustine. It is a really neat place, and for whatever reason, we don't get there too much. Now would be the perfect time. There is a ghost tour there that my kids have been dying to do. We could make a weekend of it. I know we have enough points saved up for Hampton Inn. There is a really nice Hampton Inn in St. Augustine right on the beach. So with the points our weekend wouldn't be very expensive.

Thanks for the advice.