How to handle a non-Disneyophile DW?

[DisMike]

Ok, me and all of my 5 kids are Disney freaks. I could go to Disneyland or WDW every year. Twice if I had the time and money.

However, the DW enjoys Disney but is overall lukewarm to the whole Disney thing. When I suggest a family vacation I know the response if I suggest DLR: "We did that last year (year before, etc., <insert applicable year here>). I think the kids would enjoy something else."

What she really means is that SHE would enjoy something else. The kids are more than happy to go to DLR or WDW (the kids have never been) at any time.

So as a result we don't go very often. I make an effort to do what she wants to do. Last year we took a cruise (no kids). My first. Her third. Loved it! So, this year she wants to go on another cruise. I'm all for it. Love cruising. However, it's been 2 years since our last Disney trip and the separation anxiety is beginning to build.

Any suggestions on what else I can do to convince the DW that at least every 2 years would be nice? Any help would be appreciated especially from the ladies since this is female psychology I'm dealing with here.

Thanks in advance.

 

[TheColtonsMom]

Ok, me and all of my 5 kids are Disney freaks. I could go to Disneyland or WDW every year. Twice if I had the time and money.

However, the DW enjoys Disney but is overall lukewarm to the whole Disney thing. When I suggest a family vacation I know the response if I suggest DLR: "We did that last year (year before, etc., <insert applicable year here>). I think the kids would enjoy something else."

What she really means is that SHE would enjoy something else. The kids are more than happy to go to DLR or WDW (the kids have never been) at any time.

So as a result we don't go very often. I make an effort to do what she wants to do. Last year we took a cruise (no kids). My first. Her third. Loved it! So, this year she wants to go on another cruise. I'm all for it. Love cruising. However, it's been 2 years since our last Disney trip and the separation anxiety is beginning to build.

Any suggestions on what else I can do to convince the DW that at least every 2 years would be nice? Any help would be appreciated especially from the ladies since this is female psychology I'm dealing with here.

Thanks in advance.

If she wants a cruise why don't you take her on the Dream and then tack on a couple days at DL right before or right after?

I had a non Disney husband..he was converted by our trip this past Christmas and now we have 3 more trips planned Halloween 2011, spring 2012 and fall 2012and are getting our first APs to cover them all. As far as his conversion..credit for that goes to our 6 year old son who FINALLY managed to get Dad to look at DL through a childs eyes LOL

 

[Funball]

I Will have to agree with coltonmom.. disney cruise—it's still disney related, and do it on the dream! and then tack on the extra days! That sounds like a great disney related that the whole family can enjoy vacation!

 

[goldies 5]

Is there a particular season you think you could get her to fall for possibly. Like is she a Christmas person, Halloween person, wine festival type? If she is into any of these things maybe she would feel these time are more enjoyable for her.

 

[TripHHH]

From a woman's perspective ... How about offering a Disney vacation where she takes a day or two out to do what she wants ... while you and the kids enjoy Disneyland? There are so many things to do in Southern California. She could visit Hollywood or a spa or there are some really great malls or the beach or ..... So she could go to Disneyland for a few days with you, but have her alone time to do some grown-up "woman stuff."

My husband is not a huge fan of Disneyland. I can only get him to go once every few years for 1 day! That doesn't stop me and my daughter from going though. He is very happy to be a homebody and enjoy the whole house to himself. We do lots of stuff together as as family, so it's almost like his little vacation to himself and he loves it!

If being apart is a problem, I think I would go with "We did a cruise last year ...." Even offer to do a cruise next year so you're taking turns each year of vacation destination. Now if you would want to do a Disney cruise, that might make everybody happy.

 

[Funball]

that brings up a good point,. if the tables were turned it was me, and it was my husband that didn't like DLR, i'd just leave him at home and go myself with the kids! but that is just me

an again i second the disney cruise!

 

[DisMike]

If she wants a cruise why don't you take her on the Dream and then tack on a couple days at DL right before or right after?

I suggested that we do a combined DL trip after a Mexico trip or a WDW trip after a Port Canaveral cruise. No soap. The problem??? $$$$$$$!!!

I'd love to take the kids on a Disney cruise combined with a Disney resort stay. WAY too expensive.

To respond to goldies 5, we enjoy DLR the first week of November. Not for any particular reason other than the weather is great, low crowds, and all the rides and attractions are open. So not much there.

As to TripHHH that's a really good idea. The reason she's been on 3 cruises and me only 1 is because she went with her mother on one and with her sister-in-law on another. However, she enjoys Disney enough that if I were going, she'll be going. The problem is for me to get her to want to go.

I guess I could tell her that I'm going with the kids and she's welcome to come if she'd like. Yeah, that might work. However, it might be a little tough to get on some of the rides with a rolling pin sticking out of my head!

 

[TheColtonsMom]

it might be a little tough to get on some of the rides with a rolling pin sticking out of my head!

Nah! most of the rides have lots of headroom!

 

[Funball]

Nah! most of the rides have lots of headroom!

[FONT=Trebuchet MS, sans-serif]yeah..Screaming has pull over the head seat brace thing.. you'll be fine! And soaring well you got a lot of head room! [/FONT]

 

[Huff]

I'm probably gonna be the odd one here. If you only take one vacation a year with family I would do something different rather than just Disney. Get the kids out to see and do different things.

We go to Disneyland or WDW once a year, sometimes a few short weekend trips to DLR if we can. But we also go camping in the summer, snow playing in the winter, maybe beach, national parks etc. during the year. The kids love it all but certainly want to go to Disney as well.

We've never been the cruising type. Just not my thing except if theres something to see other than the ship such as Alaska inside passage. I'd rather fly to main destinations and see far more than the typical touristy ports.

 

[babyruth]

You need to tell her to share and take turns LOL. No seriously. Where is the compromise here if you did what she wanted last year and now she just wants to do what she wants again this year? You'll have to come up with some kind of vacation rule like, you pick, she picks, kids pick etc etc. In our house we sort of do this already. I picked our first family vacation. DH picked our second. For short trips around the kids birthdays we let them pick where they want to go (within reason, key word "short" trip) and now we all decided together the big trip this year would be cali.

Otherwise, to get her to WANT to go you need to find things at Disney that she values. So maybe she doesn't like rides, characters and crowds. What is it about the cruises that she loves so much? Is it the huge buffets, the pools, stopping in different cities, plenty of babysitting or clubs for the kids so she can get away? Disney has all of those things especially at WDW. Whatever it is Disney does it well. Identify what she wants out of a vacation and show her the possibilities Disney offers. If she's dead-set against calling it a Disney vacation, you can try to sell her on "Orlando" or "Florida" and find a nice resort that isn't "Disney."

 

[Angel Ariel]

What exactly is it about other vacations that is more appealing to her? Is it more "grown up" time, is it that it's just something new and different? What about the cruise does she like?

IME, the friends/family in my life who aren't so thrilled about visiting Disney all the time feel that way, at least in part, because they see and think of it as a "kid" thing to do. DH and I don't see it that way, as we enjoy all the adult oriented things we possibly can while we're there (dinner at Napa Rose, BB, the various tours for example). Plus we enjoy being kids again while we're there

 

[DisMike]

You need to tell her to share and take turns LOL. No seriously. Where is the compromise here if you did what she wanted last year and now she just wants to do what she wants again this year? You'll have to come up with some kind of vacation rule like, you pick, she picks, kids pick etc etc. In our house we sort of do this already. I picked our first family vacation. DH picked our second. For short trips around the kids birthdays we let them pick where they want to go (within reason, key word "short" trip) and now we all decided together the big trip this year would be cali.

Otherwise, to get her to WANT to go you need to find things at Disney that she values. So maybe she doesn't like rides, characters and crowds. What is it about the cruises that she loves so much? Is it the huge buffets, the pools, stopping in different cities, plenty of babysitting or clubs for the kids so she can get away? Disney has all of those things especially at WDW. Whatever it is Disney does it well. Identify what she wants out of a vacation and show her the possibilities Disney offers. If she's dead-set against calling it a Disney vacation, you can try to sell her on "Orlando" or "Florida" and find a nice resort that isn't "Disney."

Actually we try to pick together but I'm usually flexible as and go with the flow.

Awesome advice in your 2nd paragraph! She does enjoy Disney but she doesn't like it as much as we do.

What does she like about cruising? She likes the great food, the feeling of being pampered a bit. The fact that you can relax. She also likes seeing the different ports of call and checking out the sites.

You've really made me think. I think the thing that she dislikes about Disney is:

1. We are classic Disney commandos. We do 3 days at DLR and go all out and are absolutely exhausted when we get back. I don't think she likes that part of it.

2. I really like the rides. We almost always mainly do rides. Last time we actually took time and saw some of the attractions that we hadn't ever done before. She loved that. I found that I really liked it too.

3. She's been to DLR. She's got a been there, done that, attitude. I think she has conniptions about the cost of a Disney trip when she's done it already. On a cruise she gets to go to different places.

Hmm. Think I'm getting some ideas, relaxation time, doing different things... Hmm...<insert gear grinding noise here>

You folks are great!! Thanks!!!

 

[blackjackdelta]

I'm probably gonna be the odd one here. If you only take one vacation a year with family I would do something different rather than just Disney. Get the kids out to see and do different things.

We go to Disneyland or WDW once a year, sometimes a few short weekend trips to DLR if we can. But we also go camping in the summer, snow playing in the winter, maybe beach, national parks etc. during the year. The kids love it all but certainly want to go to Disney as well.

We've never been the cruising type. Just not my thing except if theres something to see other than the ship such as Alaska inside passage. I'd rather fly to main destinations and see far more than the typical touristy ports.

We are limited to the once a year trip and everyone votes for DLR, can not convince them to go to WDW or any place else. My wife likes to hit the spa, sit in the GCH lobby and read a book, people watch , go to club 33 and the BB to eat, go to the beach, Griffith park, and the Getty Library, etc while we hit the rides. Every 4-6 weeks we head to the Or coast to whale watch and sit by a fire(2days). We are also big movie fans so we take a USH tour. The LA area is full of things to do, you just have to leave the parks to do them.

Jack

 

[Huff]

Hmm. Think I'm getting some ideas, relaxation time, doing different things... Hmm...<insert gear grinding noise here>

You folks are great!! Thanks!!!

Sounds like a trip to WDW would be better than DLR. Spend a week at WDW, get the dining plan (great when free dining is offerred) and relax!

We go to DLR and are commando's as well but at WDW its quite different. We spend a few more days, get the dining plan and really enjoy the dining every night and a more relaxed pace than DLR. Your wife maybe suprised at WDW and enjoy the food and relax yet still see all the great rides and shows.

DLR = Best for shorter trips, especially commando
WDW = Best for longer, slower paced trips, great dining plan

 

[Mama Who]

You need to tell her to share and take turns LOL. No seriously. Where is the compromise here if you did what she wanted last year and now she just wants to do what she wants again this year? You'll have to come up with some kind of vacation rule like, you pick, she picks, kids pick etc etc. In our house we sort of do this already. I picked our first family vacation. DH picked our second. For short trips around the kids birthdays we let them pick where they want to go (within reason, key word "short" trip) and now we all decided together the big trip this year would be cali.

Yep. Although we allow the older child to be part of the choosing rotation too. Oddly, I (the one here on the Dis) am the family member most likely to suggest a non-Disney destination.

We're also not averse to taking separate vacations sometimes. It works well, especially for me as I'm a SAHM and DH works. I took DS on a cross country road trip a few years back that DH had ZERO interest in and we had a great time.

 

[Mugglemama]

Ok,
I think the kids would enjoy something else."

Last year we took a cruise (no kids). My first. Her third. Loved it! So, this year she wants to go on another cruise.

Any suggestions on what else I can do to convince the DW that at least every 2 years would be nice? Any help would be appreciated especially from the ladies since this is female psychology I'm dealing with here.

Thanks in advance.

At the risk of stating the obvious here...how can the kids enjoy a cruise if they get left behind when you guys go on vacation?

I have felt lukewarm about DLR before...but each time we go, we realize it's more fun as the kids get older (because it means less hassle for us - plus, they are able to do more as they grow taller, braver, etc.)

Maybe your wife feels lukewarm about it because it's overwhelming?...Not to bash Dads here, but let's be honest, most of the work of a DLR trip often falls on the Moms (packing, dealing with the kids, getting everyone dressed in the mornings, bathroom trips, etc.) So, if you think that might be part of it, maybe offer to pitch in a LOT, and bring up the fact that time in the parks (and travel, and getting ready in the mornings, and meals, etc.) is easier (and more fun!) as the kids get older.

 

[tndislvr]

You have totally described my DH. He is "over" Disney vacations. Although we haven't visited DLR we have had several trips to WDW since our kids were born (and a few trips before we had kids). I love it more with every trip. In fact our last trip (7th trip since son was born) was our best trip ever. He just doesn't get why I (well, we, as the kids love it too) love being there so much. He doesn't soak in the atmosphere, marvel at the magic, and let himself go the way I do. While I don't expect him to love everything I love I have to admit this is one thing that I desperately wish we had in common. I'm the one who gets teary upon walking down Main Street. I cry every time we leave. He wants to do something different, and I can't really blame him. We are thinking of doing a Disney cruise later this year so he can experience something different but the rest of us still get our Disney fix. I don't really have any words of advice. Just wanted you to know you are not alone!

 

[Dobie]

How about taking two vacations...you pick one and DW picks one?

 

[Kittyskyfish]

Nah! most of the rides have lots of headroom!