How Rude was This??

[DawnCt1]

I saw a woman I went to nursing school with back in the dark ages at the Outback last night. She came over to our table where I was eating with DS 18.
That was nice. She asked how I was doing and if I still was working. I said "no, how about you?". She said; "Oh yeah, I didn't marry a doctor like you did". I said; "Christine...I married a college student, not a doctor". She said "that's true". She looked rather uncomfortable so I kindly changed the subject.

 

[ktink]

Yeah, that was a bit rude. Good for you in the way you handled it. Some people have no cooth at all.

 

[crazee4mickey]

I would have to agree that she was rude! I think she is a little resentful about something...that would take a lot of nerve after not seeing you for so many years, IMHO!

 

[Judy from Boise]

More sad than rude.....but of course rude also.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

I think she just trying to be funny and it came across bad. I don't she was trying to be crass.

 

[Marseeya]

Excellent response, Dawn!

 

[LukenDC]

It was rude, but she probably did not mean to offend you. Your response was very good. A lot of people don't realize that doctors have had to go through a lot of training and several years of skimpy pay in order to build a successful career.

 

[dmslush]

I agree, she probably thought it was going to come out funny (unless of course she has always been the rude sort), but then was uncomfortable when her 'joke' flopped.

 

[tubachick]

bad jokes

but you handled it well

 

[cardaway]

Sounded like a joke.

She's probably posting the story somewhere else saying you lost your sense of humor.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

I did not think it was funny......I thought she meant it the way Dawn took it, she was rude. In this world, it is not a plus to work hard to get ahead. There are always those who think the grass is greener in your yard and are going to let you know whenever they can, a little dig here, a little dig there. I think that she felt that Dawn's life was better than hers and that she had to work and Dawn did not at this time (for whatever reasons) so she lashed out with her little dig. This, of course, is my opinion, been there, done that.

 

[wdw4us2]

You handled that perfectly. I think you took it the way she meant it.

 

[Buckalew11]

I did not think it was funny......I thought she meant it the way Dawn took it, she was rude. In this world, it is not a plus to work hard to get ahead. There are always those who think the grass is greener in your yard and are going to let you know whenever they can, a little dig here, a little dig there. I think that she felt that Dawn's life was better than hers and that she had to work and Dawn did not at this time (for whatever reasons) so she lashed out with her little dig. This, of course, is my opinion, been there, done that.

Totally agree with you, Marsha. Thanks for saying it better than I could. (I tried but ended up hitting the back button.)

 

[DawnCt1]

Thanks everyone. She meant it exactly like she said it. She never had many friends in school and would make cutting or abrupt remarks often. She was always very over weight and that didn't change. I run into her every 5 or 6 years but its usually a quick smile and wave and off I go. How tempting it is to say something like, "you look so old now I almost didn't recognize you". But of course, I didn't.

 

[DawnCt1]

I think she just trying to be funny and it came across bad. I don't she was trying to be crass.

I have never known her to have a sense of humor. I should add that I was engaged when I was in nursing school and she knew my husband back then. We had only 35 students in the class and living in the dorm.

 

[Disney Doll]

Jealousy is such an ugly emotion!!! It was a dig. You handled it well.

 

[cardaway]

She was always very over weight and that didn't change.

Wow. And that matters how exactly?

 

[DawnCt1]

Wow. And that matters how exactly?

She annoyed me and I used restraint not to be insulting. I thought that was evident when I made the comment about her looking "old". If I liked her, I wouldn't have noticed her weight.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

You know/knew her and therefore know exactly how the comment was intended (unless of course she has changed--we all have our perceptions of others, made throughout the years, which are sometimes still accurate, sometimes not).

Of course that exact same comment made by some people could have come across as a joke, but made by others could have been a slam. Just depends on the person and how it was made.

A lot of people assume that doctors are rich. Also, that people who have a SAH spouse are rolling in dough. I've been a SAHM for many years and we make sacrifices for me to do so (well, except for my WDW trips, which doesn't help with the comments from people ).

Maybe it will be another 5 or 6 years before you run into her again.

 

[Galahad]

When I get the "you married a doctor" line my response is usually - "no, I married a computer programmer that I worked hard to turn into a doctor". On the surface though it doesn't seem like she meant any harm. We don't tell a lot of folks that DW is a doctor. People often treat you differently when they find out.