How many waited for Kindergarten (inspired by EthansMom)

[tinatark]

My ds2's birthday is Aug 26th - our cutoff is Sept. 1st - we started him in K when we were *supposed* to- he's now in 5th grade - and fine. Our older son was born in January - so he's right in the middle of all the birthdays.

Personally, I really wish the cutoff dates were a true cutoff, not an option - I don't agree with holding your child out so they can be the *first* to do things (drive, date, etc), or, moreso in the case of boys, holding them out so they can be bigger/stronger in sports.

 

[tnhillbilly]

Our son’s birthday is Sep.27, cutoff was Oct 1st. After talking to some teacher and a principal (married to MIL). We weighted until the next year. It is said that SOME boys mature slower than SOME girls. It was put to us like, do you want to send him and his school work always be work, or send him when he is a little older and mature and things might come a little better for him. He is now 10 and is in 4th grade. His best friend, that went to school the year before him ( aug. birthday) was held back by his parents because of the struggle he was having in classes. Do my DW and I ever regret not sending him? NO NO NO. When we first did it we really had doubts about, but that has changed, we are very happy with our decision now. Good Luck

 

[Magalex]

My DS turned 5 on 8/20(the cutoff date was 9/01). He could of went to K but his preschool offers an excellent PRE-K for this type of situation. He did go to the 3 and 4 yr preschool and is a excellent student and loves school. In the long run especially the teen years we thought maturity is helpful. We also never refer to it as holding him back. We say it is a practice run. Our PRE-K is everyday for 2.5 hours. They have music class, gym class and spanish class. Also on Fridays it is known as enrichment days(they made orange juice today). On one day they went to the Fire station. We don't worry if he will be bored. Elementary school will be a whole different place and a different teacher. A good solid start of basics is always good. Look around for a good PRE-K program may make all the difference with your decision. It did for us.

 

[jacksonsmom]

My DS started K this year. He turned 6 on 8/11. The cut off here is 9/1. So he could have started last year. Although I know he would have done good in K last year I felt it was better to give him an extra year for the social part.

I do not regret my decision one bit and I would do it again!

Good Luck it is a hard decision. Like someone said I heard people say they should have waited one more year but I have yet to hear anyone that has waited say they should have sent them a year earlier!

 

[jacksonsmom]

Personally, I really wish the cutoff dates were a true cutoff, QUOTE]

I personally wish there was a National cut off.
I also wish the cut off was around June 1st so every kid will be 5 years old and at least a few months before school starts. JMO

 

[720L]

"I personally wish there was a National cut off.
I also wish the cut off was around June 1st so every kid will be 5 years old and at least a few months before school starts. JMO "--jacksonsmom


I totally agree!! This makes the most sense so I wonder why it isn't like this?

 

[robinb]

I sent my DD to Kindergarten when she was eligible. She made the cut-off by 2 weeks. She had a great Kindergarten experience, but 1st grade is much harder for her and she is behind most of her classmates on reading. Some of them are reading chapter books already!

 

[shortbun]

We waited. Late summer birthday with Sept 1 cut off, preemie,adopted, boy. He was socially shy too. He's perfectly placed with the kids in his class. About half of them were delayed entrances too. He has great athletic ability, great social skills and academically he's doing very well. What more could we hope for?

 

[georgina]

Personally, I really wish the cutoff dates were a true cutoff, not an option - I don't agree with holding your child out so they can be the *first* to do things (drive, date, etc), or, moreso in the case of boys, holding them out so they can be bigger/stronger in sports.

Most people I know didn't hold their children for these reasons. Kindergarten is much more academic than it used to be, so some of them just aren't ready. Children are widely varied in their abilities, and our school is not good at dealing with that. My son had speech problems and was extremely shy and we did keep him (born 3 weeks before the cutoff) back a year. Especially with boys, who mature slower, it has become the norm around here. My son does not play sports and I couldn't care less when he learns to drive. Like it has been said, I don't know anyone who held back who has regretted it.

 

[JennaTX]

Our DD turned 5 on Sept 1st, which is the cutoff date here. We went ahead and sent her to Kindergarten. She was already reading and she is not shy in any way at all. Academically she is fine, she finsihed Kindergarten and is now in 1st grade doing great. She is a little immature compared to some of the other girls in her class, but not by too much. I figure within another year or so, it will all even out.

I think that you know your child best and will be able to decide when the time comes what he will be able to do. Good luck with your decision!

 

[staci]

My younger brother had a july birthday. He turned 5 in the summer of 1988 and could have gone to kindergarden, however he was small for his size and my mom was worried about that , so they sent him to alternative kindergarden for a year.

For him, it worked out wonderfully. He was always shorter for his age (until HS) so he never seemed 'bigger' than everyone else. In fact, his best friend was 11 months younger and was taller than him! He did well in school, and was in the accelerated math and science by middle school. Our district does a good job of handling gifted students, so I dont think he ever got real bored. He graduated valedictorian in a class of 500 kids. Now that he has gone off to college he is the president of his political organization on campus, treasurer of the fraternity, has studied abroad for a term, has a 4.0 as a junior, etc.

My parents are very happy they held him. He was always pretty shy and reserved until he neared 20, and they think he has gotten so much more out of his college experience by having that extra year of maturity.

I am sure that my brother would have been successful grade-wise without the extra year, but that year of maturity (I think) has really helped him apply some of his intelligence more practically in his life.

The ONLY downfall that I saw for him, he was 21 before everyone he went to school with, and I know he felt the pressure big time to be the 'supplier' to everyone, and it was a really hard place for him to be.

 

[Texan Mouseketeer]

My DH and I really agonized over this with our son. Still are. Here are some problems we ran into in our neck of the woods. Not arguing or anything, just food for thought because I definitely don't know what the right answer is!

I teach middle school. Any child that does not fit the age range of what is 'standard' is labeled At Risk for not graduating high school. They put a code by the kid's name and you're supposed to give special attention to these students to make sure they're doing okay. So even kids that were put in late get this label. I remember last year doing research to distinguish between which kids actually failed and which ones just started later.

Also, in Tx now, you have to pass TAKS in 3rd and 5th to move to the next grade. Pretty soon they're throwing in 8th, too. If you wait to enroll a child and then they should happen to fail one of those lovely tests, then they are actually considered two years behind.

It's a tough decision. I'm hoping when my daughter is this age, it won't be such a hard choice to make for her!!

 

[kimwim8]

Thanks again everyone! I really appreciate all of the responses!

It really is a tough/individual decision.

I know that we will have DS tested for Kindergarten, and will have a conference with his preschool teacher again before we make the decision.

Thanks again!!

 

[castleview]

And -- truth be told, we had a lot of fun having them at home with us the extra year!

Could not agree more with that! They've got the next 12 or more years to go to school.

 

[Skatermom23]

How I struggled with this decision many years ago. My son's birthday was in July with a Dec 31 cutoff. I was also a young child and just didn't want that for him. He was very mature, academically ready, but I kept thinking of the HS years. Every teacher I spoke with said let him go, but my gut said to wait. I made the decision at age 5 to put him in the Pre-K grade instead and therefore he started K at age 6. Fast forword to this year....he is now in 8th grade and will attend HS next year. This was the best decision I have made as a parent yet!!! He has always been the mature kid and has always gotton good grades but it is about so much more. All I can say is that I feel like I have given him such a gift by delaying his entry. He will turn 18 the summer of his Senior year and 19 the summer after he graduates. I feel so much better knowing I will send my 19 year old off to college than my just turned 18 year old. It is difficult to think so far ahead when they are so young. But you will be glad you did.....

 

[luvmarypoppins]

We waited the extra year. He just made the cutofff by about 6 weeks. But he was really immature, short attention span and needed to work on his speech and social skills. That year he went to a transitional kindgergarten which was 5 half days a week. It was at a private school and it was pretty academic so it was not just like an extra year of playtime. 2 of the other boys in his class now were also in that tk class with him and they are all doing great, much more maturer than the other kids for sure.

 

[golfgal]

The cut off here is Sept 1st so basically they want kids to be 5 when they start kindergarten, which is a good thing. DS13 is mid July birthday and where we lived when he started school wasn't big on holding kids back. Academically he was ready and his pre-school teachers felt he was ready so we sent him. We moved between kindergarten and 1st grade and he was suddenly the youngest in his class. He did fine 1-4th grade but into 5th grade the maturity issue started to really show. Holding kids back in this town is HUGE. There are kids in his class that have winter birthdays, Jan/Feb so they are turning 15 in a couple months and DS just turned 13 in July. That is a HUGE difference. These kids will be getting their driver's permits in 8th grade! One of our neighbor kids is 5 months younger then DS and 2 school grades behind him because he was held back for sports reasons.

I would say with boys if there is a question, hold them back. Girls are more likely to be ok even into high school since they tend to mature earlier, but that is really in individual case. I would rather have an older child in class then a younger/youngest.

For those deciding to send a December birthday 4 year old in states that have a December cut off, just think a little down the road when it comes to college selections-your almost 2 year younger child will be going up against the students from other states that were 6 when they started kindergarten. Just something to think about.

I think school cut offs should follow the school calendar-meaning they have to be 5 before the school year starts to enter kindergarten.

 

[HollyJoy]

I think that this can be a hard decision to make, and you have to take it child by child. My youngest daughter was born at the end of September. When she was in the 4 year old preschool class, I had a talk with her teacher towards the end of the year to find out her thoughts on the matter. See, our school system is pushing the cut off date back, so that it ends up at August 31. My daughter wasn't affected by this cut off, but I knew that many parents might start to hold their kids back due to it. I thought my daughter was ready for K, and her teacher supported my feelings. I sent my daughter to Kindergarten last year, and though she was one of the youngest in the class, was right on target. She is tall, so fit right in. I'm glad that I went with my gut and sent her when she was ready.