How long did you date before getting married?

[beattyfamily]

We dated for about 4 1/2 years before we married in 1992. Next year we'll be married 15 years and we'll be renewing our vows.

We've been together a total of 20 years next December, 2007.

 

[Tumbleweed]

I may hold the record. We were just married last October...after being
together for 26 years! We were engaged for most of that time. I have
5 different engagement rings.

Every time we planned to get married, something happened to mess up
our plans. So last year (the day before we left for Disney), we went
to the courthouse on our lunch hour and got married! Then we made our
trip to Disney our honeymoon with our good friends who we meet for
Halloween every year!

 

[tinaluis]

DH and I dated for just over 9 years before we got married. We always knew we'd marry, but my parents and his never offered to help with the expenses of the wedding, so DH and I had to save up (in addition to saving for our home) to afford the small ceremony we had. No regrets, though, and we're still happily married 13 years later!

 

[Dory's Twin]

I saw this really hunky guy in Econ class the first day of my Sr. year of HS....went home and told my Mom that I had seen the man I was going to marry......Started Dating April of 1980....married May 1985...still madly in-love.....

DH's best buddy dated a gal all thru College and more (6 years) she gave him an ultimatum, left him, ended up dating and marrying another one of their best buddies (still married)....the guy that got dumped is just now married..he's 43 and she's 25!

 

[Disney Doll]

It was 2.5 years for DH & I from meeting to marriage. We met when I was 26 & he was 31.

Really, the length of time someone dates or lives together or does whatever without getting married isn't an issue if both folks in the relationship are truly fine with the arrangement. And there are some folks who feel no need whatsoever to be married, and will be together their whole lives without ever getting married.

The problem with your friends is that they seem to be on 2 different pages with regard to marriage. Based on her reaction at weddings, she wants to be married. Regardless of her reasons...and people get married for many reasons...marriage is a life goal for her. It doesn't seem as if it is a life goal for her boyfriend. In this particular case, 7 years is more than enough time for him to have decided whether or not he wants to marry her. The fact that they are not married or engaged leads me to think he has no interest in marrying her. He may not have an interest in marrying anyone, but he certainly has no interest in marrying her.

I'd break up with him. I wouldn't give him an ultimatum. I wouldn't cry, carry on, and scream about it. I'd say "Marriage is a life goal for me, and it's not for you. I need to find someone whose life goals are similar to mine, so I don't spend my life angry and frustrated". Certainly it won't be easy, but it won't be any easier another 7 years from now, when she's got 14 years invested into the relationship.

 

[lizardqueen]

DH and I started dating on 04/28/95 and were married 04/28/01. It was a long wait, but worth it in the end (at least most of the times!!!)

 

[Grumpy's Wife]

DH and I got engaged 7 months after meeting. We got married 10 months after that. This October we will be married 17 years.

 

[Kitty 34]

2 years for us.

 

[LisaNJ25]

DH and I started Dating 9/91 ( just turned 17), Our son was born 10/92 and we were married 5/93.

 

[msmouse]

9 years! But, of course, I was 14 when we started dating.

 

[Tazicket]

My DH and I began dating when I was 16 in High School and he was just shy of 21 and in college. We dated for two years, then got engaged (on the anniversary of the day we began dating), then were married one year later (on the anniversary of the day we began dating/got engaged). I was 19 and he was 23.

Our third anniversary will be next month.

 

[willis37862]

We met in March started dating in June and were married in December all of the same year. We will celebrate 4 years this december.

 

[nana2tots]

Exactly 10 months

 

[tubachick]

10 years until engagement, 2 years after that till wedding, and now we've been together 3 more....

so 15 all together!!!

 

[Keli]

A couple months shy of two years. We were both really young but we beat the odds and we're still going strong 22 years later.

 

[Pin Wizard]

It was 4.5 years for us. I won't ever let it go that long again!

 

[Laurajean1014]

We dated for 18 months and then were engaged 18 months to marry on the same week as our first date (3 years later).

 

[ckret01]

I was with my boyfriend for 7 years and this past x-mas we got engaged. We are getting married next May in 2007. I am 32 and he is 37.

 

[skuttle]

DH and I began dating in Feb 1994, but we were still in high school at the time. We got engaged in December 1998. We were married in June 2000 (wanted to wait until after I graduated from college).

 

[Tink9748]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 1/2 years. I am 30 he is 35. 3 kids later we still aren't married and have no plans to get married. We are just comfortable the way things are. Maybe 10 years from now we will get married but maybe not.