How do you tell your kids school(s)?

[daisyduck123]

Because back to school night is not about your child - it's about learning about the school/classroom. It is never appropriate to discuss anything regarding your individual child with the teacher on back to school night.

You stated it perfectly. Thanks!

 

[daisyduck123]

I hate to say this but that's a lot of school to miss!! A week and then closer to two plus some time around spring break!! Be prepared for your child's teacher not to like it. Your kids, your choice but I just can't see any school being ok with that much time for vacations in one year. In our school system that child would not get credit for the year and have to repeat. There are 4 parent note absences and 5 unexcused allowed before loss of credit. Anything outside the 4 parent notes have to be doctor's note or they will not be excused.

Is this a public school?
I can almost guarantee that no public elementary school is going to require a child to repeat a grade because they missed two weeks of school on a vacation. There would have to be extenuating circumstances...like a child already working below grade level.

I'm sure the absences that don't have doctor's notes get recorded as "unexcused", but to repeat the grade. I doubt that.

The county I taught in for 9 years (before switching to my present county) had a written policy stating that "any student who fails to return any overdue school media books or pay the book fine prior to that start of the next school year, will not be promoted". It was a written policy (just to scare families into returning those books or paying the fine) but was never actually PUT INTO ACTION. If your school does actually have this policy, I'm sure it's never actually been executed.

 

[Girly_Qs]

I hate to say this but that's a lot of school to miss!! A week and then closer to two plus some time around spring break!! Be prepared for your child's teacher not to like it. Your kids, your choice but I just can't see any school being ok with that much time for vacations in one year. In our school system that child would not get credit for the year and have to repeat. There are 4 parent note absences and 5 unexcused allowed before loss of credit. Anything outside the 4 parent notes have to be doctor's note or they will not be excused.

K, I agree that the equivalent of 3 weeks of school missed for vacation is more than we'd consider personally (and I don't hesitate to take them out for a week for WDW - don't even bat an eyelash!).

BUT, a total of 9 absences (including sick days?!) and a child has to repeat the grade?!!? That's downright insane, IMO.

Our state's policy:
After 10 'unexcused' absences (sick, even with just the parent's say-so is apparently enough to qualify for excused status) a form letter is sent home. After 15 unexcused absences, a social worker may be called in to 'discuss excessive absences' at the discretion of the school (ie. if they review the attendance record and see that a child has been sick, etc, they can choose NOT to refer the case).

Personally - we are already planning on taking dd#1 out of 1st grade, for 5 school days, next December. It is a trip with my sister, brother-in-law, and my parents, which my parents will be paying for a large portion of. It's her last week of school before Christmas break, so she shouldn't miss too much (save her class party, which she's opted that she'd rather be with Mickey!). Plus, she's tested several grade levels ahead. I don't intend to be disrespectful to her teacher, etc, but I'm also not really giving pulling her out that week a second thought.

I will notify the teacher a couple weeks ahead of time, with a 'reminder' a few days before we leave.

 

[princessmom29]

Is this a public school?
I can almost guarantee that no public elementary school is going to require a child to repeat a grade because they missed two weeks of school on a vacation. There would have to be extenuating circumstances...like a child already working below grade level.

I'm sure the absences that don't have doctor's notes get recorded as "unexcused", but to repeat the grade. I doubt that.

The county I taught in for 9 years (before switching to my present county) had a written policy stating that "any student who fails to return any overdue school media books or pay the book fine prior to that start of the next school year, will not be promoted". It was a written policy (just to scare families into returning those books or paying the fine) but was never actually PUT INTO ACTION. If your school does actually have this policy, I'm sure it's never actually been executed.

Yes it is a public school. This is the k-12 attendance policy for our school system and believe me we do enforce it. I teach in high school, but it is the same policy K-12. I have 2 students who will not recieve credit in my classes this semester and several that have lost credit for past grades and had to repeat. We have 6 seniors who are not graduating b/c they lost credit for attendance. Their grades are all passing, but they get no credit. The only exception to this rule comes when a child "ages out" of the school they are in. That cannot happen after eighth grade. It HAS been executed in the lower grades as well. I have had 16 year old ninth graders who were held back in middle or elementary school for attendance. Two weeks of missed school wthout a doctor's note can and does cause a child to repeat a grade. With anything afet the 4th absence being unexcused the students get zeros for all work they miss for usexcused absences. Usualy 5 unexcused days usually causes their grades to be failing or just barely passing anyway. I am sure exceptions are made by principals, but I also know that they DO enforce this policy, and it is up to the principal to make the exception or not. If they feel that the child needs to repeat the grade they can choose to require it, no matter what grade level they are working on. I personally would not put my child's fate in the hands of a principal over a VACATION.

 

[erika412]

I know conversation has moved a bit away from my original post, but I wanted to say that I spent some time today talking with other parents at the school. All of them agreed that it should not be an issue considering that they are only going to be in K and 1st. They have all either pulled their kids our or know someone who has without issue.

I have also been planning on being a room mom next year for either both or at least one of them so I should know the teachers very well by the time we go on the first trip. (no, I'm not doing the room mom thing specifically for this, but I hadn't thought of that aspect at all.) That makes me feel better from my initial stress-out because we are active and involved parents (board chair, and executive board chair at their Montessori preschool) and although it might not matter to the teacher, it matters to me.

Thanks for helping me figure all this out.

 

[meanmom121]

I usually tell the principal and the teachers at the very start of school and then remind them about 6 weeks to a month prior so they can begin making plans for make-up or do ahead work. I try to set up a meeting with teacher a week before we go to finalize plans for making up work. Since we usually drive, I try to take some school work with us that they can work on in the car i.e. math papers, reading assignments. Teachers have also assigned my kids journaling activities for their trips to report to the class on our return. All in all the school has always been more than accommodating and never penalized my kids for being out of school.

 

[roscoepc1]

I said "XXXX will be absent the week of -----. We will help her play catch-up when we return."

Period.

In our case, the teachers don't care, so when they asked where we were going, and we said Disney, they were excited for us.

If I knew they WOULD care, I would have simply said, "We have to go out of town" and changed the subject.

 

[snakenberg]

I feel that you might as well tell the truth of the absence because the kids (especially for the younger ones) will be so excited that the teacher will already know that they are going to Disney. I figure the teachers know a whole lot more about our home life than we ever wanted them to know....

Don't sweat it, the teacher will be envious that he/she is not going with you!

Have fun!!

 

[hockeymom3]

Sorry to get off the original topic, but I too find it crazy that a child would/could fail the year for missing that amount of time. Unexcused absenses in high school - ok I can see that. But excused absenses?? crazy!

My kids have had 11.5 storm days this year. My daughter missed a week having her adenoids removed and tubes put in her ears and we're going to miss 8 school days for this Disney trip. And if it weren't for the fact that my husband started a new job, we would miss another week going to Philly for a wedding in June. Yep, 3 weeks into a new job and we're going away!!! (It was planned MONTHS ago, and he told his employer during the interview)

During the time we are in Florida there are 4 other kids in the class who will be away during pretty much the same time - and they're going to Florida too!! A few missed a couple days in March for vacations and a few in April.

 

[Mickeypooh99]

Sorry to get off the original topic, but I too find it crazy that a child would/could fail the year for missing that amount of time. Unexcused absenses in high school - ok I can see that. But excused absenses?? crazy!

ITA.

It is unexcusable that kids could be held back based on absences and not on performance. If the child is at or above grade level in their work at the end of the year holding them back would be a total waste, and I feel a power play on the part of the school system. I also think it is just plain silly to give zeros for kids on days absent. If they can make up the work why not let them. Even in high school. If they can't make up the work, then okay give them zeros, but at least let them try.

I actually missed lots of class time in college, and still got good grades in all my classes. They didn't grade on attendance.

I am always so thankful for the understanding school district my children attend.

 

[erika412]

I was telling my husband about these replies and he read the thread the other day. He's had an account here for a while.

It got him wondering too and he looked up online the attendence policy at the school. They get 25 days so I feel much better in addition to feeling better from all your replies.

(and, yes, I agree with those of you that find the blanket policy of holding a child back because of attendence ridiculous. It should be on a case by case process. Child A is keeping up with school work, is at or beyond level and parents are involved. Child B is not keeping up with school work, is below level and parents are too lazy to get them to school regularly. Something should be done with Child B- whether or not the school system keeps them back, social services should get involved to get the parents into parenting classes.)

 

[tessiesevin]

My daughter goes to a catholic school. If she misses 3 days of unexcussed absecents it is after school detention. I am very nervious to tell my daughters teacher and principal that she will be missing three days.

We are ready to deal with the concequences. This will be a once in a lifetime thing for DD. We go once a year but I am bringing her on her Birthday and I think it will be wirth it.

 

[scootch]

My kids also go to a catholic school and so many kids are pulled out for vacation, it has become a norm. THey do try to discourage it, but with our schedule, there is no real spring break(only Holy Thursday and Good Friday off and then Christmas and Thanksgiving of course). I usually write a letter saying I am taking them out. Sorry for any inconvenience this may cause you. We will do everything to get all school work made up in a timely manner to make this as smooth as possible.

Interesting to see what will happen this fall.... there are 12 kids in my dd's class and SEVEN kids are going either to WDW or on a Disney Cruise the week of November 16th) missing 5 days.... that will only leave 5 in the class. eekkss...

 

[meanmom121]

I was telling my husband about these replies and he read the thread the other day. He's had an account here for a while.

It got him wondering too and he looked up online the attendence policy at the school. They get 25 days so I feel much better in addition to feeling better from all your replies.

(and, yes, I agree with those of you that find the blanket policy of holding a child back because of attendence ridiculous. It should be on a case by case process. Child A is keeping up with school work, is at or beyond level and parents are involved. Child B is not keeping up with school work, is below level and parents are too lazy to get them to school regularly. Something should be done with Child B- whether or not the school system keeps them back, social services should get involved to get the parents into parenting classes.)

even if you have gone over the allotted amount of abscences that have to have a hearing to discuss moving on. They can't just automatically hold them back for absences. Very rare that they'd be held back for absence unless it is so blatantly chronic i.e. weekly occurrances (in which case the court is usually already getting involved.)

 

[Madzac]

I told my DD's teacher at the first parent teacher conference about it. She is in first grade. Her teacher was excited for us. She said she just usually had the kids keep a travel journal and sends some books to read. She said to just remind her about a week before and let the office know right before we leave. I feel a little guilty, but DD is a good student and I know this family trip will be very special. She will miss 4.5 days. My DS#1 is in preschool and I just told his teacher last week and she wrote it on their calendar. She said she was jealous!

 

[hockeymom3]

So with our trip 2 weeks away I decided to send a quick note to the kids teachers. Basically said:

We'll be away, if there is anything you would like him/her to do when we get back we will be sure it is done - whatever is convenient for you.

My sons teacher wrote back a wonderful little note that he should just read menus and brochures, etc. that the trip was a marvelous learning experience in itself and he can catch up on learning time and symmetry when he gets back.

I cannot even imagine having to stress over whether or not a school "allows" you to take your child out of school.

IMO, an excused absense is when the parents KNOW the kids are absent, and an unexcused is (sigh) when they're in high school and skip class (guilty!)

 

[MissionWDW]

We were in a different school district for the last Disney trip. The school policy there required me to fill out a form and wait for it to be approved by the principal. It asked basic question like how long will we be gone and how can the child learn from the experience. The teacher sent home an approval letter and it expressed how excited she was for my daughter.

This thread got me thinking, so I just checked the policy at our new district and it says nothing about family vacations. In fact it says any amount over 5 days requires a doctors note. Anything over 6 days would be cause to consider a child in the elementary level for retention!! Ugh..I'm so freaking about about this now. We don't go every year. We haven't been since 2006. She will miss 7 days of school. My daughter has had amazing attendance this year...missed a few days due to illness. She is also a great student..principal's honor roll for two years straight. BTW..she will be in the 3rd grade. I'm sick thinking about this. Flight has been booked, hotel reserved, tickets purchased. I live on a military post and you would think they would have something set up for this sort of thing. Especially with parents coming home and taking their families on vacation during their R&R. I guess I just need to call her school and see what I can do.

 

[gabbysmom04]

My family is going in Nov from the 22 of Nov to DEC 3. My DD is starting kindergarten in Sept. I have been thinking about what the school was going to say. We are DVC members and we go 2 to 3 times a year! I am not big on a school telling me when I can take my children on vacation and for how long. I think that is my choice as a parent. As long as the time is within reason and the work is made up then what is the big deal?