How do you handle kids with birthdays close to Christmas?

[luckey-lasvegas]

My DD is turning 4 on December 27 too! If we do a party for her with little friends then I would do it the beginning of January. We haven't done that kind of party yet though. We do separate gifts on Dec. 27 for her.

One of the great things about December birthdays for little girls is that all those little girl stocking stuffers are %75 off after Christmas and they make great goody bags!!

 

[carrie1626]

DD will be 21 this year Her b-day is 12/31. For the first 17 years of her life the Xmas tree was down, I wanted no reference to it when taking pictures and such!. Then she told me it didn't matter to her anymore-how about that. But I still have no regrets about making her b-day as special as possible. AND believe me she was never gyped in any way $$ or present wise. There was always ballons, cake ,ice cream ,a family tradition of going to the movies and a ton of presents ( again).

 

[momof3poohlovers]

This is a great thread. My son will celebrate his 1st birthday on Jan. 2nd and I was wondering what to do with his birthday.

 

[almburr]

We have 3 birthdays near christmas. DD is the 11th DS is the 13th DH is the 27th plus our anniversary is Jan.2nd

I do not put up any decorations until after the 13th (I ws the one that would decorate on December 1st). They always get birthday presents in non-christmas wrapping. The other kids are a little jealous the those two get presents close to christmas. But the other 3 have summer birthdays, so that makes the December kids jealous. But it all works out.

 

[abcboys]

I always wondered about this, too. I have a relative with a Dec. 24 birthday and its always been implied not to give a joint birthday/christmas gift but a few times I would have liked to get him something that was normally more expensive than I would have spent on just one present but didn't know if that was okay in that circumstance to give a joint present or if they would frown upon it.

I understand your point about the combined gift, but here is the way we figure it.

We spend an equal amount on each child for Christmas and Birthdays. If we spend say $100.00 for Christmas, and $100.00 for birthday that limits what we can buy. Now if DS wants a $200.00 lego set, he would be out of luck for Birthday or Christmas. If we combine the gifts, then he could get it. (this is just an example, I have never bought at $200.00 lego set. )

Now my boys are old enough to understand the concept. They also BOTH have December birthdays. So there wouldn't be any worry about 1 having a summer birthday while 1 has a Christmas birthday.

My DH has a Jan 2. birthday. He wanted a TV one year. That was more than I wanted to spend for Christmas or Birthday so I combined the gift. He was thrilled to get the TV. Not upset that he didn't get 2 seperate gifts...

We don't always do combined gifts, I just think it works out sometimes to their advantage.

 

[amylynne01]

I understand your point about the combined gift, but here is the way we figure it.

We spend an equal amount on each child for Christmas and Birthdays. If we spend say $100.00 for Christmas, and $100.00 for birthday that limits what we can buy. Now if DS wants a $200.00 lego set, he would be out of luck for Birthday or Christmas. If we combine the gifts, then he could get it. (this is just an example, I have never bought at $200.00 lego set. )

Now my boys are old enough to understand the concept. They also BOTH have December birthdays. So there wouldn't be any worry about 1 having a summer birthday while 1 has a Christmas birthday.

My DH has a Jan 2. birthday. He wanted a TV one year. That was more than I wanted to spend for Christmas or Birthday so I combined the gift. He was thrilled to get the TV. Not upset that he didn't get 2 seperate gifts...

We don't always do combined gifts, I just think it works out sometimes to their advantage.

I think we're on the same page. I would not do combined gifts unless the birthday person understood combined gifts AND approved it. So for my DD turning 3 in December, no combined gifts because she doesn't get it. If she were turning 16 and wanted some ipod thingy-do with all the accessories and she agreed to one gift for both occasions, I would do that.

I personally would only do combined gifts for my own kids and hubby (if he had a December bday). If it's a niece/nephew or other family member, I would get them one for each holiday. We pick names on both sides of our families, so we may not have the bday person for Christmas.

 

[mrsltg]

I always wondered about this, too. I have a relative with a Dec. 24 birthday and its always been implied not to give a joint birthday/christmas gift but a few times I would have liked to get him something that was normally more expensive than I would have spent on just one present but didn't know if that was okay in that circumstance to give a joint present or if they would frown upon it.

I think it depends on the age of the person. A small child who doesn't know one day from the next? One gift is great! A child who is old enough to understand Christmas vs. birthday and feel like one is being ignored? Not so great! Older kid who maybe wants an IPOD from Grandma? Excellent idea!

 

[Jack&Ryan'smom]

When I found out I was due on 12/24 with our 1st child I swore I would always make his Bday special and never let him/her feel cheated.
Well my Ds was born on 12/28 and will be celebrating his 10th Bday next month.

We always have a special day...out for breakfast then maybe a movie then we have the family over for pizza & cake that evening. It's kind of cool because even though it's usually a weekday everyone is pretty much off that day.

He used to have a friend party the weekend before Christmas. But now that kiddie parties can be crazy expensive and not in the budget...we let him pick a day close to his birthday that he and a few friends can go play laser tag & then go to McDonalds for lunch.

It's funny talking about combined gifts. We've never done that but htis year my mother wants to combine his gift so she can get him a really nice bike. I asked DS and he doesn't seem to mind. I think there are so many gifts coming to him in December that he really doesn't care about which gifts are for which occassion.

 

[RMulieri]

I think it depends on the age of the person. A small child who doesn't know one day from the next? One gift is great! A child who is old enough to understand Christmas vs. birthday and feel like one is being ignored? Not so great! Older kid who maybe wants an IPOD from Grandma? Excellent idea!

THIS EXACTLY...When my daughter was real little she didn't know the difference, but now that she is 6yrs old she DOES notice and it is hard as a parent to try and explain .It isn't about making Christmas " all about the gifts", but when family and friends routinely ignore her birthday it hurts her.I have to say that our family seems to realize this now , thank goodness.But it was not always the case.With a birthday on Dec 26th, separating the 2 is not simple, but we try tnce she is older and the gifts start to get much more expensive, I don't think she will mind the combined gifts

 

[mrsltg]

THIS EXACTLY...When my daughter was real little she didn't know the difference, but now that she is 6yrs old she DOES notice and it is hard as a parent to try and explain .It isn't about making Christmas " all about the gifts", but when family and friends routinely ignore her birthday it hurts her.I have to say that our family seems to realize this now , thank goodness.But it was not always the case.With a birthday on Dec 26th, separating the 2 is not simple, but we try tnce she is older and the gifts start to get much more expensive, I don't think she will mind the combined gifts

YES! My poor DHs January 1 birthday was so routinely ignored and combined that MY family set out to change it! My parents threw my dh his first ever birthday party when he was turning 40 - how sad is that?!? For little kids who can understand, a separation seems to be key. We celebrate three birthdays in my family between 12/8-1/1. Every one is a separate event and every one is treated as a special day.

 

[PEANUT1]

My daughter will be 7 Dec 23rd. So far, she really likes having her birtheday close to christmas..I am sure that will change as she gets older. This year we are going to see Toys Story on ice with friends that night so that will be fun!!

I usually have her birthday party like 2 weeks before her birthday because if I wait til right before, some people are so busy with christmas stuff that they don't go.

 

[Feistygirl916]

Both my daughters and my birthday fall within a week or so of Christmas

There's only one thing I put my foot down on when it comes to birthday parties...

NO CHRISTMAS WRAPPING PAPER!

 

[5 for WDW]

My birthday is December 23rd and my middle son's is December 21st. You would think we would have known better..lol.

Growing up my birthday was always lumped in with Xmas. Santa cake, xmas wrapping paper for gifts, etc.

For our son we have always made sure his birthday is strictly a birthday. Yes, the xmas decorations are usually up so, we usually opt to do something out of the house. Ice skating one year, movies, etc. Last year he did choose to go to the Christmas Spectacular at Radio City and bring a friend instead of a party. But, that was his choice.

We are surprising him this year for his birthday with something geared towards Xmas but, we know he is going to freak! We are taking him into Yankee Stadium for breakfast with Santa. Tour of the Stadium and a gift bag. Then we will spend the day in the city. It will be the 5 of us and his best friend. We know its going to be a really special day. That is on the 5th so, he will probably have a few friends for dinner and a movie closer to his actual birthday.

His birthday gift is never combined with Xmas. Its just our choice. We want to give him the same attention as his brother and sister get. He will be 11 this year.

I love having my birthday close to Xmas now. The holidays are my favorite time of year so it is a great time to celebrate.

 

[northriver]

My son's b-day is a week and a half before Christmas. When he was young, we had a party the weekend of or before his b-day and usually kids could attend before leaving or being too busy with holiday things. I think the parents actually liked having somewhere to drop their children for a few hours!

As he got older, we started doing "dinner and movie" parties with just 2-3 other children. There are always new movies coming out just before the holidays and that has worked really well for us. My son never really liked being the center of attention at larger parties, anyway.

My youngest child has a mid summer birthday and actually I found that children are more available to attend a party right before Christmas than in the summer, when school is out and so many are traveling.

ETA: From an organizational standpoint, I do like having a "before Christmas" birthday in the house. I do my Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving and spend the time between Thanksgiving and the birthday cleaning, decorating and wrapping. I'm pretty much always "ready" for Christmas the week before, when we celebrate DS's birthday. Then we can enjoy the days before Christmas cooking, baking, doing crafts, etc. Vs. the crazy last minute shopping my parents always did when I was a child, ick.

 

[Tink813]

I have two during the Holidays...one Nov 30th and one Dec 6th...luckily they are far enough away from Christmas....but we do let them pick what they want for dinner and make sure they get something special for their Bdays and not pick out one of their Xmas presents....becomes tempting!

 

[klacey1]

We have a ton of birthdays around this time! My brother's birthday is the Christmas Day. Growing up, my parents just gave him double the presents as me. He wasn't super social growing up (very shy), so he never had a birthday party. My birthday was in June and I had huge parties up until 3rd grade, then sleepovers with 10 or so girlfriends. My parents didn't give me birthday presents until I was 11 or so, when the parties were much smaller. I guess they figured it evened out-- my brother got a ton of presents from them, but none from friends; I got nothing from my parents and a ton from friends. He also always got a non-Christmas cake, but since his gifts were "Christmas/birthday," they were all wrapped in Christmas paper. He definitely made out terrifically and never minded. I think my parents made him feel special!
DBF's birthday is the 26th. He would have a friends party usually during Christmas break he says, and always get separate presents from his parents/family. I've always wrapped his presents in Christmas paper, but I only buy plain green/gold paper, so it's not strictly "Christmas-y." He's never minded.
I agree with the PP who said it's not necessary for parents to go over the top to separate the birthday from the holiday season. Just IMHO. My brother never minded the Christmas paper or neither did/does DBF. I guess some people are more sensitive about certain things?

 

[dougsmom98]

My DS's birthday is December 26th. We have his birthday the weekend before Christmas at our house. He loves it because he gets presents before Christmas. Kids are so anxious to open presents before Christmas, so he loves it. We have a family and friends party. Sometimes there have been major snow storms and it turns into a more intimate affair, but we have have four kids and my in laws only live 1/2 mile away so we make it as festive as we can. It's kind of nice because it forces me to have a really clean house for the party and then I only need to maintain it from that point on until Christmas. It also serves as a get together with people in my family that I don't see on Christmas. My family lives 4.5 hours away. We do not travel down there on Christmas, but they do travel and visit for the party if the weather is okay. It also usually coincides with the Christmas pageant at our church, so my parents get to see that too. I sometimes worry about it being a pain for his friend's families to get their kids there, but they usually appreciate that I am taking their kids off their hands for 3 hours.

 

[Irish9697]

My son will be 11 on December 7th and my daughter will be 10 on Christmas Day. Up until this year, we had a party for each (a combined one in between the two dates when they were toddlers and preschoolers) right around their birthdays. Last year, for example, my son had 9 boys to watch NFL football and eat wings at a sports bar type restaurant on a Sunday afternoon the day before his actual birthday. My daughter had 6 girls to get their nails done, go through the Christmas light show at a local park and spend the night one week before her actual day. Year before, we took 6 boys and my son to an NBA game where his name was flashed on the big screen two nights before his actual day. For my daughter, she had a dozen kids to paint pottery 4 days after her actual day.

We've always made them separate events and so have our friends and family. It can definitely be stressful to have 2 kids 12 months apart with December birthdays, but...we always make it special and birthdays are always a special event. Christmas Day, it is always clear that it isn't only Christmas, but also Anna's birthday!

This year we are going a different route...we are going to Disney Dec. 16th - 22nd in lieu of parties! We can't wait!!!

 

[NHdisneylover]

My son's birthday is December 22 and my daughters is December 26. Poor kids. I hate my December birthday and vowed never to have kids in that month--never say never!

Actually, thus far my kids don't mind much. We generally put up two trees. One traditional one with all of the Christmas gifts under it. A narrower one decorated only in Disney and the birthday gifts go under it. This just sort of evolved on its own (I put up a "Disney" tree one year and the kids started putting birthday gifts under it and it stuck).

On the birthday itself the birthday child gets to choose anywhere (within reason) to eat out. We take family gifts to the restaurant and they open them there.

We usually hold my son's party a week or two a head of time and my daughter's a week or two later. We are as likely to be travelling that time of year as anyone else. Occasionally we do both before hand--sometimes on the same weekend doing one party Friday night into Saturday (they mostly like to have an overnight involved) and the other Saturday afternoon into Sunday. One year DD did want her party on her actual birthday even knowing that not many people would be able to come. We were pleasantly surprised that it worked out that year and every girl she invited came! Generally I figure that even kids with birthdays in June don't always have their parties on the closest weekend, or same day, so it is not such a big deal to shift things around a bit.