How do you feel about child harness?

[Liberty Belle]

One more thought - it's all great for the anti leash people to say that it's different when it's a special needs situation. The reality is that lots of kids with autism are runners, and you can't tell that the kid has autism by looking at him/her. That's when we find ourselves being publicly judged and shamed because our seemingly "normal" child isn't acting in age appropriate ways. Thank goodness we've moved past it, but taking DS out in public from 4-young 6 was horrible. People were jerks. He especially had a hard time with the grocery store, and that's not one of those places you can just quit going to. Add in the fact that his sister is only just over a year younger, and I really didn't have a lot of options to keep everyone safe and relatively happy.

Yep, kids with ADHD don't come with a sign, either, and often behave in ways younger children would. My son is nine, now, and I'm learning to not care what other people think. Unless it's my child's teacher, therapist, or pediatrician, etc, it really doesn't matter in the least.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Mine was in reference to what I saw as lazy. If you have no interest in interacting with the child and can't be bothered to even look at them as they strain their leash in a different direction - it looks lazy. I wasn't saying that most of the time that is the case - most of the time lazy crosses my mind when I see that particular situation.

Take from it what you will and pick bits and pieces of what others say.....that seems to be a fun game of posting on a message board.

That first comment, the "we had control over our kids..." was the whole of his comment. Not a bit or a piece. Very judgemental. Very like this poster's typical posts.

 

[jujube]

Our now calm 28 yo son was a wild child. When we went to WDW, we told him (age 5) to either hold our hands or stick close. If he didn't listen to the rule we would go back to the room. He broke away and we went back to the room. After about 3 hours we asked him if he was ready to listen and he said yes. We never had the problem again because he knew we meant business.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Our now calm 28 yo son was a wild child. When we went to WDW, we told him (age 5) to either hold our hands or stick close. If he didn't listen to the rule we would go back to the room. He broke away and we went back to the room. After about 3 hours we asked him if he was ready to listen and he said yes. We never had the problem again because he knew we meant business.

But you do realize, that every child is different, right? Do you think those of us who need to use a harness haven't played out that scenario? Do you think we've just not stuck to our guns long enough for our kids to "get it" or to "know we mean business?"

And I'm not just talking about "special needs" children, because, honestly, I think it's all a spectrum. My oldest had no diagnosed disorder, but he was a little more impulsive than the average child. They're ALL different - special needs or not.

 

[Suellen]

That first comment, the "we had control over our kids..." was the whole of his comment. Not a bit or a piece. Very judgemental. Very like this poster's typical posts.

I'm not speaking for the other poster - but mine specifically you clipped from a statement that included more. My post never said all leash users are lazy - just what I see as laziness.

Oh course I dont know the whole story of why they don't look at there kid once while I behind them an they are talking to someone else or playing on the phone instead if interacting with the child - but lazy is what comes to mind.

Whatever - I really don't care what others do.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I'm not speaking for the other poster - but mine specifically you clipped from a statement that included more. My post never said all leash users are lazy - just what I see as laziness.

Oh course I dont know the whole story of why they don't look at there kid once while I behind them an they are talking to someone else or playing on the phone instead if interacting with the child - but lazy is what comes to mind.

Whatever - I really don't care what others do.

Just to clarify: It wasn't I who posted those quotes, I was just butting in and mentioning that the first quote was the entire post of that poster.

I, too, get very frustrated with parents who are busy playing on their phones or chatting, etc, while their child needs their attention. I definitely get where you're coming from there!

 

[jujube]

But you do realize, that every child is different, right? Do you think those of us who need to use a harness haven't played out that scenario? Do you think we've just not stuck to our guns long enough for our kids to "get it" or to "know we mean business?"

And I'm not just talking about "special needs" children, because, honestly, I think it's all a spectrum. My oldest had no diagnosed disorder, but he was a little more impulsive than the average child. They're ALL different - special needs or not.

Yes, we have 3 children and I'm well aware that each child is different.
I have no idea about anyone else's scenarios. I shared what worked for us.

Apparently some children do not "get it" and need to be leashed.

 

[Suellen]

Just to clarify: It wasn't I who posted those quotes, I was just butting in and mentioning that the first quote was the entire post of that poster.

I, too, get very frustrated with parents who are busy playing on their phones or chatting, etc, while their child needs their attention. I definitely get where you're coming from there!

Oops - sorry - posting from my phone while I was in car line at school! I didn't flip back to see who originally posted it!

I apologize.....though the basic contents of my post are still true....sorry again though - it wasnt directed at you!

 

[dimimi]

My only thought is with all the walking involved at Disney, I would still use a stroller.

 

[sherry7]

My 2.5 year old daughter likes riding in the stroller, so I never really considered buying a harness before. However, I was at Kmart this evening, and they had a Safety First brand toddler harness on clearance for only $1. I'm now the proud owner of a harness, lol. Whether or not I actually ever use it remains to be seen. But, I see nothing wrong with them...better than a child getting lost, or running out into traffic.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

My only thought is with all the walking involved at Disney, I would still use a stroller.

I think ironically, this is a reason for the harness. My kid is long past leash age, but when he was little I found that I could walk holding his hand OK, or I could push him in the stroller, but when we had the stroller with us and he decided he'd rather walk, it got challenging. Similarly, I'd have considered a harness in the airport where I was dealing with luggage plus toddler.

I have no problems with harnesses, although I didn't happen to use one.

 

[disney1990]

I don't like them at all. When our children were of an age that we felt they might wander, they were either held by the hand, carried, or pushed in a stroller.

Do what you want, but we never used one.

Do what you feel comfortable with?

We have been with families on more than one occasion that have lost their children. The stress that they went through in the 15-20 minutes that they were without their children was unimaginable.

 

[damo]

I'm not speaking for the other poster - but mine specifically you clipped from a statement that included more. My post never said all leash users are lazy - just what I see as laziness.

Oh course I dont know the whole story of why they don't look at there kid once while I behind them an they are talking to someone else or playing on the phone instead if interacting with the child - but lazy is what comes to mind.

Whatever - I really don't care what others do.

This is what I clipped from. Here is your entire post.

I would never use one. I think they are dangerous for one (the wrist kind especially) and the others just look too much like walking a pet to me. I too feel bad for the leashed child. Most of the time parent is looking elsewhere and not at the child and seems as though the parent just doesn't want to be bothered with looking after their own child.

That said - I would never say anything to someone using it - really it is none of my business what you do with your child.

I'm sure I was judged plenty - and probably still am for some of the things I do with my children. For example - if theynwant to bring "it" in the park - whatever "it" happens to be they are responsible for carrying it all day. I don't care if it is 50lbs worth of stuff in a backpack. You bring it - you carry it. Where as I bring nothing to the park so I carry nothing. Mean mom? Maybe - but our family - our rules - so I don't care what other people think.

Do what you need to and don't worry about others.

And oh boy - a bus sitting thread AND a leash thread in one weekend!

You weren't talking about laziness at all.

Perhaps you weren't trying to infer that most parents who use leashes don't want to be looking after their children, but that is what it comes off as. If you had said, "sometimes" it wouldn't have been a big deal but you did say, "most of the time."

I think it was in a later quote that you were talking about laziness. It doesn't really matter as I imagine your message that you tried to convey was different than what you typed. However, I think it was one of the reasons people got their backs up. Unfortunately, that's the way these threads usually go.

 

[Suellen]

You are right - it doesn't matter. I gave up on this thread a long time ago. I dont care what others do. I notice the use that appears to be pure laziness - everyone else I rarely notice.

Fortunately my kid are old enough not to need them. I have no stake in this debate.

 

[S. C.]

You are right - it doesn't matter. I gave up on this thread a long time ago. I dont care what others do. I notice the use that appears to be pure laziness - everyone else I rarely notice.

Fortunately my kid are old enough not to need them. I have no stake in this debate.

And you are still posting on this thread!

 

[Suellen]

And you are still posting on this thread!

Yeah - yeah when some quotes me I feel compelled to answer - when I get a notification in my email and apparently I hadn't unsubscribed yet.

I have now though.

 

[damo]

Yeah - yeah when some quotes me I feel compelled to answer - when I get a notification in my email and apparently I hadn't unsubscribed yet.

I have now though.

testing, testing.....

You are right - it doesn't matter. I gave up on this thread a long time ago. I dont care what others do. I notice the use that appears to be pure laziness - everyone else I rarely notice.

Fortunately my kid are old enough not to need them. I have no stake in this debate.

My kids are 26 and 23. You don't need to have a stake in the debate to participate.

 

[S. C.]

testing, testing.....

 

[Maridw]

I bought one for my granddaughter and used it at our local mall. She is only 2 and we had the stroller with us in case she got tired of walking. But we wanted to let her walk by herself. This is just a nice solution for us. She is partially independent, but still under our control per se.

While we were wandering the mall, another mom and grandmother with a little one saw us and asked us where we had purchased the harness. They liked the idea.

My sister used one with my 29 year old niece when she was 2 and I loved the idea then and while I could not find that type of harness when mine was little, we did find one that went on her wrist and my wrist. I did not like that one as much. My granddaughter likes her harness and likes to "walk" herself by holding one to one end while I hold it at the middle.

 

[disney1990]

If you knew my daughter (when she was younger), you would understand. She walked at 9 months. She climbed out of her crib before she was 12 months. If there was something she could climb into our out of, she did. Later, she couldn't walk, she could only run.

It gave me pleasure, years later, when she was a Disney College Intern, watching her trying to get the kids in the parks to stop running. Paybacks