How do you curb a case of the "gimmies" and the "wants"

[KJET54]

We tell the kids to browse in the parks decide what they might like and take them to Downtown disney on the last day so they can pick out something to remember their trip with. Most of the time the children we bring opt for something 20 dollars or less. telling them up front they can only get something on the last day keeps them from asking all week

 

[MEredhead]

We went this past March for only 3 days. Our DD was 3.5 at the time. We told her if she was good during the day she could pick out one toy at the end of the day. This worked surprisingly well for us. It eliminated the constant I want this and that. And she never picked out a very expensive item - usually it was a small figurine - she loves to play with the princess figures. We are going back in September and will use the same approach again. As she gets older and gets more expensive taste, we may move toward the disney dollars or wait until the last day strategy.

 

[minkydog]

Go to the Disney store and buy Disney Dollars in the amount you wish to spend for each of them, plus Grandma's cash. Put it in two seperate envelopes or a coupon holder for each child. Explain before you leave for the trip they have $_.__ to spend on stuff for the trip/day and that is it. By being able to show them the money and hand it to them to give the cashier, they feel more in charge of their purchases and especially for the 10 year old may teach her some money responsibility and planning tools.

You may even want to go as far as to seperate in to catagories of stuff, like- T-shirt $15, toys $10, extras (glow-necklace, parade souviners) $10. That way they can plan ahead.

Or let them have a set amount for each day.

Good Luck!

This is exactly what I do and it has worked beautifully. The first time we took DD8 she had her Disney Dollars and she visited every shop she saw, but she wouldn't spend her money until she found THE MINNIE MOUSE. Not just any Minnie, but just the right one. We didn't try to discourage her or interfere because clearly she had thought it through. She bought her Minnie and never asked for another thing.

I usually dispense each child enough money to get a couple Cokes each day adn I buy them a T-shirt. Otherwise, I let them spend it any way they choose. When it's gone, it's gone

 

[100AcreWood]

We have perfected this yet but my suggestion is to avoid shopping whenever possible. Also I normally end up buying one thing a day for dd (it is vacation afterall). So when she buys her one thing we say okay that's it until tomorrow. If she asks again I said we already bought _____. Seriously though she normally gets the gimmes when she's tired or hungry.

Have fun!

 

[my4kids]

I say "no"

 

[taragl]

DS7 is generally a polite kid, but he *asks* for things constantly. Politely, of course.

"Mom, may I please have some gum?"

"Mom, could I get that shirt?"

"Mom, would it be all right if you got me those rubber bands?"

Sheesh! I just get tired of saying no, no, no. I tried giving him an "allowance" last year, but there was change in his pockets and singles flying everywhere. So this coming WDW trip, I've come up with a coupon system. He gets one coupon for each of the few things I'm willing to buy him. One for a t-shirt. One for any light-up thing. One for a pin and so on for a handful of treats. The hope is that we'll be anticipating his requests and making it clear that what he gets is limited to the coupons.

Anyone else tried a system like this?

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I told DS who was 6 last trip and DgodD who was 10 that we weren't shopping in the parks, at least not on the first part of the trip. About midway through the trip we went to DTD and let the children shop in the big toy store there. They had their own money which worked great (they ended up spending very little and taking the rest back home -- they clearly understood that prices were high at Disney), but with a 3 year old I probably would have just said -- you can choose 1 toy and 1 T-shirt, or 1 big thing, 1 middle sized thing, and 1 small thing.

After our DTD trip there were a couple of things they had noticed in the parks that they didn't see at the toy store and we picked those up later (DS wanted stickers with the character autographs, for example). DgodD also got something at the China Pavillion at Epcot, since we knew we wouldn't be able to find it anywhere else. But in general, we didn't shop in the parks. If they asked (I think they asked once) I just said, remember, we're not shopping in the parks -- there will be time for that later" and that was that.

 

[sameyeyam]

I give each kid $10/day for whatever they want. They can save it up, spend it each day, I don't care! But if they start bugging me for more money or stuff, I fine them $1 for each time they ask. The $1 fine comes from their next day's money. Usually shuts them up.

Also, when you get off rides, don't dawdle in the gift shops. The temptation of seeing all the new shiny stuff makes kids WANT! Just hurry the kids on through and they probably won't even notice that it's a gift shop at all.

You can also purchase cheaper Disney souvenirs before you leave. Target, Walmart, Disney Store all sell souvenirs a lot cheaper than at Disney. Get some of those and give them to the kids each day.

 

[rlrx]

We did the same thing as most people and my DS7 and DS3 earned Disney dollars for good behavior, chores, etc. and also saved money they were given for Easter and ended up having over $50 each to spend. We told them they could spend it on whatever they wanted but they had to wait until we went to Downtown Disney. The day they went there, they spent it all so we didn't have to worry about it anymore. My DS3 actually made better choices than my DS7. There were a few other "I wants" but I reminded them about spending their money and they were okay with that. I also made a Disney goodie bag for each of them and gave it to them our first night there so they would have something new and Disney (including shirts) that I didn't have to buy in the parks.

 

[lovmy2girls]

We always tell our two, you have this amount of money. You can ethier spend it all at once, one big item, lots of little stuff. ITS ALL YOU GET! There is no more money. Its pretty much worked for our trips. It breaks my heart to watch them hold something, hug it, and put it back, and say "I'm all out, next time". I have to admit , I have caved in a few times. Those girls have us wrapped around their finger.

 

[Sandi12404]

We're going in October and have been planning this trip for over a year. My girls have been getting Disney Dollars for everything. Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy have given Disney Dollars plus they got them in their birthday cards. My DD8 has about $70 and my DD2 has about $40 and we still have 14 weeks to go. DD8 has been doing extra chores to earn extra money. She's a shopper like I am so she wants to have lots of money to spend. I also have been saving my pennies and quarters and have enough for about 60 pressed pennies. I figure they will feel they're getting something everytime they press a penny and that will help, too.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

For trips we set our souvenir limits prior to the trip. Once the preset dollar amount has been reached--no more souvenirs. My girls just understand this.

I don't tolerate the gimmes and I wants (I try not to let them watch commercial television for this reason) and this has worked for us.

They've even learned when we had passes that if it didn't involve a hotel then it wasn't a "vacation" so on day trips to Disney we never had issues with souvenirs either as we didn't make purchases like that just for a day visit.

 

[FSUDisneyGirl]

i have a few suggestions...

don't give in! i just took a behavior modification course, and one of the biggest things is to be consistent...if you give in on the first day, they'll expect it every other. however, if you are firm on the first day, they won't be expecting you to buy lots of souvenirs!

i'm not saying to be evil , just divert their attention to the next ride, character, etc. also, if one of them starts to be upset, many times it works to just ignore their behavior. if you can get one of them happy and distracted, i bet the other will come around soon!

 

[HRPro]

Hi

I took my DD5 for her first trip this June. We were at WDW for 9 days. Before the trip we talked about spending money. She gets $3/wk for allowance, (she must put $1 in piggy bank and can spend the other $2), she decided to save all her allowance money for the trip. She received only Disney Dollars. Easter Bunny & Tooth Fairy also gave disney dollars. She also had the opportunity to earn extra money. By the time our trip rolled around she had about $17/day. I told her I would buy the t-shirts, but everything else was up to her. I also went to the Dollar Store and got Princess & Cars items as Tinkerbell gifts.

We decided that when we looked in the shops we would make a list of items that we wanted and then come back and buy things later on our shopping day. She did put several things back on the shelf when I said "You have to use your money."

She did very well and came back with $60. She did not get the gimmes, because she'd repeat I know we're only looking right now.

The money she came home with went into her piggybank for our Disney Cruise this Spring.

I think the biggest thing is to set rules and limits before you go. We decided on things together and since she had a say in the rules, there were no fights.

 

[Vickie46]

my little 4 yr loves tinkebell leaving her gifts at our room.. so this has cured the I wants from WDW gift shops... she still wants her autograph book but that is about it! I buy her trading pins ahead time so then she is set... Tinkerbell leaves all kinds of neat stuff each time we are out of the room!!!!!! You never know what she might leave... a lot of disney princess stuff... find stuff cheap at Dollar stores etc.

 

[kddlm]

I love browsing in all the stores, but rarely buy just for the sake of buying. What I do for the kdis in WDW is let them know ahead of time that we are buying our souveniers towards the END of the trip. After each gift shop we go in, they write down their "wants" in a little notebook (and there is usually at least something on the list from every store) with the storename and location, then towards the end of the trip we go over the list and they get to pick out what they really "want". I'll give them a $ limit and they get to choose what they want. Sometimes they wind up with 2 things and sometime 5-6, depending on $ amt. I feel it not only teaches them the value of a $1, but gets them to see how some things are more important to them than others! And, as we all know, for the most part, what one store in WDW has, the next one will have as well......so we haven't had to do too much schlepping around to get their souveniers!

 

[Naisy68]

There is a Berenstain Bears book about the gimmies. I read it to my DD (almost 5) when we are about to go somewhere where I feel she will be "wanting" a lot like on vacation. It has worked for us so far. When she starts to ask, I ask her about what brother and sister bear did in the book and she would tell me and the incident is over. I like to use books for some of the life lessons because she has a real love for books and it tends to work for her plus I'm happy to know she is able to comprehend pretty well. We have been reading one about the Princesses and manners. She wants to be a princess so it makes her think about how a princess would act. Let me tell you, some of her table manners has me afraid to send her off to school. They might think that we eat with the animals. Ha!!
My DH used to ask her when she asks for something, if it was a "want" or a "need." It didn't take long for her to figure out that everything was a "need." She's not anyone's dummy, that's for sure!
Good Luck, it's a real challenge sometimes but there have been a lot of great ideas in these posts.
Have a Disney Day, Renee

 

[budbeerlady]

We do two things to curb this (opps its 3 once I write it).

DD can pick at the end of the trip what she would like us to buy her.

DD saves her money all year and buys herself a couple of things. Change is goobled up at our house by her, even a penny. She is a saver. Last year she bought a teddy bear, and a pin trading lanyard set. She came home with about $50 after the trip.

Tinkerbell visits DD everynight leaving little things and notes. Like glow in the dark necklaces from Targets $1 section. Then she didnt ask for anything at Wishes or Illuminations. (Which she would have had to buy herself, and she agreed they were very expensive.) So Tink leaves t-shirts found on clearance at the disney store. Little toys and a couple of things she saw DD really looking at WDW that were under $10. And a sucker or something DD can take to the parks so it isnt expensive candy all the time.

 

[solgent]

Going with 2 nieces, age 3 and 10, for the first time this fall. How do I control the "I want this" or "Can I have that" spell that kids seem to fall under everytime they are in a gift shop?

I am a big push over aunt and normally when we are in the Disney store in the mall I get them each something every time but if we are in WDW there are a million stores!

The trip is not cheap as you all know but I do want to make sure they get stuff from AK and MK too. Should I tell them to wait until we are leaving the park or to pick one thing per day or what??

My mom is going to give them each some "gift from grandma" cash for their trip but I am seriously worried that they will throw an embarrassing tantrum if I have to say no...and then DH is worried that I will cave anyways!

Any tips would help, and if you have not guess, we do not have kids so I am new at this ha ha

People have already written a lot of ideas. But one thing I would say is a crucial first step, which is to think through your attitude. Why do you buy them something every time you are at the Disney Store? Is it to make them happy? Because you are worried they will pitch a fit if you say no? Is it just a habit or tradition? Maybe some of each?

*If you want to make them happy, then you've got to try to convince yourself that spending time with you is the best gift. That is the truth, after all. You do not need to load them up with trinkets. Do they really play with these things in the long term? Of course everyone likes a souvenir, but maybe you can think & talk ahead of time about what would give the greatest enjoyment in the long term. Starting a collection (pins, magnets, plastic figurines, etc.) or matching T-shirts or a special cup that they can use year-round or a picture frame for a photo of your trip or whatever, and then you focus your shopping on that and ignore the rest of the merchandise. I think kids get the most fun out of sets or collections rather than random things that catch their eye.

*If you're worried about their reaction, be firm. Here's where a lot of the tips come in. Remind them of the plan, make sure you don't spend too long in the shop, take breaks so they're not cranky. They may test your limits especially as this may represent a change from your former behavior, but that's part of taking care of kids.

*If it's just a habit, you can change it and make a new habit of just buying something sometimes. Maybe start this before you arrive at WDW!

I think that if you are clear on WHY you are doing what you are doing, whether it's buying or not buying, you are much more likely to stick to whatever plan you develop and much less likely to "cave." Get your DH to remind you if you feel that you're weakening.

You sound like a very loving and generous aunt and those kids are lucky to have you!

 

[Myrtle]

Buy the book "The Berenstein (??spelling) Bears Get the Gimmies." It's great. After reading it to my son a couple of times, he'd get the gimmies in the store and I'd refer to the book. It helped a lot.

Myrtle