how did you determine your underlying/emotional reason for overeating??

[ohMom]

ok, i'm confused

I watched Dr. Phil today and was in awe of just how much weight people have lost -- and gone all the way -- losing those last 10 lbs that I have battled with for quite some time now

I started 8 mins in the morning with Jorge today -- though i'm not excited about yet another food journal, I keep telling myself just buck up and do it! something needs to change to break out of this maintaining thing I have been in when I really want to lose those last 10!

I know what I need to do -- i'm not revved up to do it. Then I think -- "why do I splurge/binge/cheat?" weekends are the hardest for me. That inner voice says "it doesn't matter" either because it's just for that moment or I can't do it anyways??

i don't think i'm a true emotional eater? how do I know? I always thought I overate out of boredom, now I'm not sure. How did you all pinpoint the type of negative thinking you struggled with to then overcome it? There has to be some reasoning for why I allow myself to sabotage a weeks worth of staying on plan for a meal or day of snacking on the weekend

 

[luvmydogs]

Hi ohMom WOW--what a question! Have you ever heard the saying that food is the drug of choice for some? It is for me. Binging was (is) a temporary high for me, followed by a very low comedown. In the last 15-16 years (my yo-yo dieting phase), I haven't figured out why I turn to food for comfort (I know I shouldn't), I just know I do. I eat when I'm sad, lonely or upset. It's funny, but before I was married, I'd start dating a really great guy (you know how you feel in that "honeymoon" stage of a relationship), and I'd lose weight--but now because I was trying--it's just because I wasn't eating every two seconds to try and feel better about something that was missing in my life. (Hope this is making sense!) I'm in the maintenance phase of my weight loss now, but emotional eating is something I still deal with everyday--I get angry with dh, I head right to the fridge. It's something I don't think I'll ever overcome, even though I know I've sabotaged my weight loss efforts for the last 15 years by doing it. I just deal with it the best I can, day by day. Oh my, ohMom! This is probably more than you wanted to hear! Paging Dr. Freud.....

 

[MelanieC]

Wow- this is a tough question. I want to know the same answer. I did really good and was really finding some good answers when doing my Dr Phil book, but then I got busy and never finished it.

I hear you about having a hard time with those last 10 pounsd. I was down to 142 and right now I can't get over this hurrdle. It's me though, because I will do good all week and have one or two days of bad eating. Last week I still lost 1.2 pounds, but I have a feeling I didn't loose this week. Not this week, but the week prior I came home from WI at my meeting to find that my computer had crashed. I spent two whole nights fixing it and staying up till about 2am each night. The lack of sleep and stress from this, layoffs at my company were being handed down, taking on a new group of people at work and the stress of a party that Friday was really causing me to binge by Wednesday night. I didn't count my food at the party either, but ate ok.

This week, everything was great until Saturday. DD made magic cookie bars for a bake sale at church. She went to a birthday sleepover, so I had to cut them and bag them. I ended up eating the ends that were too crunchy to bag and about 2 whole ones that crumbled. Then I drank milk on top of that. My fingers couldn't stay out of stuff. I was eating pretzels, melba toast, nuts and other things. Most were low points things, and I really didn't eat tons of it........but I kept finding myself doing it. Sunday morning, I think I was Pre-PMSing. I don't know where they come from but I was a mess. I ate out of stress yesterday because of this.


I keep asking myself, why I can't get busy and just get these last few pounds gone. Why am I having such a hard time (most day's I am not) when I didn't cheat once for so many months.

A lot of time, it's not because I am hungry. I think I am definately an emotional eater because I eat out of boredom, stress, lonliness etc. I need to figure out a way to channel these stresses to something else besides food.

Is there any hope for us!

 

[lmhall2000]

1. Putting others before my own health- cause sometimes that's easier than doing the work on me than on them (changing diapers, organizing drawers, preparing 3 meals is easier than finding an hour to exercise by myself!)

2. Growing up in the South, whenever my mom made cookies or fudge- it meant she was happy and loving- I loved her warmth at those times- ever notice they don't make cookies when they're on the war path?? To me cookies meant peace and love!

3. Relying on God to give me the wisdom to NOT choose the fat loaded meal (cheeseburger/fries/brownie) and actually prefer the salad.

4. I finally have learned to pamper myself....when I meet a new goal I indulge in a new inspiration outfit or buy creative memories supplies or Crabtree Evelyn soaps! It really helps!

And now I look forward to the times I bake cookies with my children- but I put the time we do it together above the food- I let them relish the cookies and I relish their smiles.

And I'm smiling in a pair of 14 jeans not a pair of 22's!! ONWARDS & DOWNWARDS!!!!

Tara

 

[wiskband]

I always hear that this is a reason why....although, I can not sense to pin point if I even have one. Although, I have come to realize that like IMhall said, I have always put others before myself, especially when I became a mother ( a mother of four no less). ALthough, I continue to put the kids before me even now. I now take some time out for myself. I don't feel bad saying, "hon, I need to get out of the house for a few hours, Ive had it". I think that I have always had this superwoman type of personality. I always wanted to do everything and get everything done (not sure why) So, now I simply apply that attitude to myself.
As far as Dr. Phil, ( this is my own 2 cents) I started out not liking him , then gave him a chance (read the book) and realized, ULTIMATELY I don;t like him. I really don;t think hes that smart. Yea a lot of things he says make sense but the way I see it theres nothing smart about telling people what they already know.
I do think that in my case my weight came from laziness, I formed many bad habits and I tended to think that I will always be young and thin. Till one day I realized you have to work at somethings (very hard).lol
good luck to ya
renee

 

[A1A1]

Is it possible that there doesn't really need to be some deep emotional, psychological reason for our overeating? What if it really is that we have established a really bad habit, whether it is eating while the tv is on, or eating when we come home from work, or even eating when we are upset. It is just a habit. Nothing more. There is a trigger, and we respond like Pavlov's dogs that salivated with the ringing of the bell. We may be just like that. Long ago we taught ourselves to behave in certain ways and they became habits. Why do we put the right shoe on before the left, or why do we wash our hair before our bodies in the shower? Habit.

Is it possible? I think so. It takes 30 days to break. Every time we successfully break an old habit, we replace it with a new one. I think we just have to choose to replace the old habit with a new, healthy, better one.

 

[maryliz]

I think I totally eat out of boredom (and habit). My DH goes to work every night at 10PM. I am not the type to go to bed at that time, so I turn on the TV. And somehow I just feel like I need to be eating while I watch it. I've tried hard to break it, and I cannot count how many times I have stopped myself heading to the kitchen by saying to myself, "you're not hungry ... you're not hungry". I'm trying for healthier low-point snacks, but doesn't always happen that way.

Oh, and my inability to control myself when there is a loaf of fresh white bread in the house, total habit, and not one I can break. I've tried ... the only solution I have found is to not buy the stuff

Mary Liz

 

[A1A1]

Seems like most of us go off track with desserts, breads, snack-food-type foods. I am not sure how many or who is doing the Atkins or South Beach plans, but both books give good information on why we turn to carb rich foods when we eat. Habit, yes, but maybe physiology more.

I always binged at night. It took me the longest time to figure out that I wasn't really hungry, but that I was thirsty. My body was telling me something, but I missed the cue. I went for food, when it was water my body was craving.

I hope I get it right this time, and listen to my body when I'm full or when I'm thirsty.

 

[AlreadyexcitedGrammy]

Then I think --"why do I splurge/binge/cheat?"

I am sure that it is related to your answer to the thread: Getting to know you...getting to know all about you...

your response to question #6. What activities or sports did you do in high school? Mom - close your eyes - beer drinking

My total gut-feeling is that there is some "deep-seeded" emotional regret for telling your mom you were always going to "practice" – granted you never detailed just what you were practicing….(so how was a mother to know) …. but, somehow I truly believe that it now is coming back to haunt you in a pattern of splurging/binge/cheating with food.
Hey whatta you think - would Dr. Phil go for this theory??????


Okay, seriously, well, I don’t have any motherly advice, because I am right there with you – doing and thinking the very same thing. But, one thing is that, you really are just fine at the weight you are at (now I understand that you want a little more off but you are just fine). Do you think that you are concentrating too much on a number and not just relishing the fact that you are “okay” at this weight? Maybe it is time to just be in a mind-set of being in a maintenance mode and then at a later time – try again for few pounds off, if that is what you think you need to do.

 

[nancyj_pa]

I agree with A1A1. I don't think there has to be a deep, emotional reason for being overweight. No matter what Dr. Phil says, there could be other reasons. Probably only those with the deep, emotional reasons are on his show.

I never felt I overate yet gained weight every year. I now know that I made some poor food choices, didn't exercise at all, didn't drink water, etc. Also, the aging process slows down your metabolism and people tend to gain weight each year without doing anything different. I stopped smoking some years back, and that seemed to put quite a number of pounds on me as well.

I also have thyroid disease and take medication for it. This is not supposed to cause weight gain when it's under control, but I still think it does.

We all have to figure out what to do to turn this around in our own ways. We each have different reasons for gaining, and we'll each have different ways of getting rid of the pounds. What's important is that we're all in this together and have the support of a wonderful group of WISHER's.

NancyJ

 

[ohMom]

it is good to read that others don't necessarily think there is an emotional reason behind the overindulging

thanks mom for the kudos, I really just get so disappointed in myself after staying on plan all week and then blowing it over the weekends. I tell myself I want to lose another 5 lbs to loosen my jeans up to a comfortable level and then I spend my weekend drinking wine and eating chocolate! PMS -- i know that too, but it just seems so not worth it on Monday.

I think I have to try to be more aware of my eating for the moment times; and stop and remember the consequences; weigh the two and then make my decision. and then let it go. I'm not really beating myself up about the number on the scale; just my lack of self-control at times.

 

[LAinSEA]

While I think that emotional eating may be a factor, I don't like Dr. Phil's and others opinion that it's our own damn fault that we're fat. Yes, I'm the one who puts the food in my own mouth, yes, I'm the one who decides to make or not make time to exercise. But I don't think thoses choices are the only factors.

Almost everyone can say that they associate certain foods with levels of comfort, love, well-being, or celebration. But the decision to eat or over-eat based on emotion is one that is learned. And who or what taught us to do it?

Then look at the foods we choose to eat emotionally? Some of those foods have been "engineered" to keep us eating, and eating, and eating. Portion sizes at both fast food and sit-down chain restaurants have grown so increasingly large that we've learned to ignore our own "full button" and keep on eating.

Even our own government has recommended a food pyramid that for many of us just packs on the pounds no matter how little "fat" or "protein" we put into our bodies.

Then there is the media (of which I am a part), that tells us that even a size 6 is too big - only actresses who are size 0 get the big parts, etc. Some models in magazines look like they are starving themselves to death. There is no difference in their size and appearance than the poor children they show us on the "forgotten children" commericals.

The only thing I agree with Dr. Phil is that yes, you have to take responsibility and charge of your own life. No one can do it for you. But I sure wish that as many research dollars would be spent on disease prevention and treatment (including obesity) than for viagra or levitra etc.

-Laurie

 

[Beastlover]

My problem is definately emotion triggered. I found out today at work that the person I have been filling in for the past 4 months is coming back, and my last day is Monday. I got pretty upset, and when it was lunchtime, I went out, got an Arby's beef n cheddar and fries. Now, on Atkins, this is called "cheating" I am the one who visualized non-plan food as the devil. I did not cheat from 6/16 to 12/16...6 months I kept it together, never feeling like I was missing anything. I noticed once I went off plan around Christmas, I find it easier to fall off when stressed, or upset.
That is my story, and now I have to learn to back off when the feelings come up. Find other ways to deal with them...going for a drive allows me the opportunity to cheat, or turn to bad food choices to cover up my feelings.
There.

 

[ohiominnie]

Originally posted by AlreadyexcitedGrammy
I am sure that it is related to your answer to the thread: Getting to know you...getting to know all about you...

My total gut-feeling is that there is some "deep-seeded" emotional regret for telling your mom you were always going to "practice"

OH MY GOODNESS! I started reading this and thought to myself "OUCH! That hurts!" Not until I got done reading this post did I realize who posted it....and then I had to reread it and cracked up laughing! Too funny.

I have learned, through my plan, that God has designed our bodies to need a certain amount of food. We are wonderfully and fearfully made by God with all of the signals of hunger and fullness (or satisfied) there from birth. I believe that we have two holes to fill in our bodies, one, our stomach which gets filled with food, the other, our hearts which need to be filled with God. Too often, IMHO, we are trying to fill our hearts with physical food instead of with God. We eat when we are happy, depressed, bored, sad, rejected, excited, social, anti-social, hurting, in pain, or lonely. These are times when we should be turning to God instead of physical food. When we are physically hungry, our stomachs growl. When our bodies are satisfied, things don't taste as good (ever notice how the first bite of something tastes SO much better than the last??)

I think, IMHO, that God wants us to listen to our bodies...after all, our bodies are our temples. I think, IMHO, that God would MUCh rather we turn to him instead of a pint of ice cream (if we aren't hungry) I think, IMHO, that Satan puts things in our mind to get us to believe that we don't need God when it comes to diet issues....."one more bite won't hurt" "a pint of ice cream isn't THAT much" "you're not fat...look at the obestity problem in America...you're actually THIN by those standards" "it's just a bad habit, you could stop at any time if you wanted" etc etc. Satan wants you to fill your heart with food....because the more food in there, the less room for God.

Next time you are hungry for something or bordering on a binge, pray. Ask God if this is really what your body needs. I'll admit, it's hard at times. Because some things can taste so good. I'll admit, I fail a lot. I need to go to God more when I'm contemplating that other 1/2 of a Reese's cup and Satan is telling me to just eat the whole thing, it's not that big of a deal.
Anyway, that's my $0.02.