How are you affording your DFTW?

[LuluLovesDisney]

How did you guys afford your wedding? Did parents help? Do you all just have great jobs, or are you great budgeters or what?

Thanks!

 

[princessblueeyzes]

First off- don't get too worked over not affording a Disney Wedding. If there is a will then there is a way- I am a firm beliver in that.

We started off saving last August when that's where I decided that I wanted the wedding was in Disney, and before I know it I will have more than enough money saved for our trip plus extra things that I would want to buy.

Don't tell anyone- but I was planning on doing the whole Vegas thing until I realized that I am a princess and I need a princessy wedding. I realized that if I did a Disney wedding that it would have to be an intimate wedding at the WP for 18 people (of course not including DF and myself) , because I cannot afford a custom wedding and it would be less stress on me than a huge wedding. I then started planning, the WP is around $3500 then the hotel room for DF and me is $900 for four nights- we have chosen to do it during Value season so the hotel rooms are a little less expensive and the parks a little less crowded. Then dinner after the wedding I figured in about $600 total for us and our guests. I have been buying the small stuff when I see it on sale. I also told myself that DF and I will not get into debt for our wedding as I am a huge believer that it puts too much strain on a newly married couple.
My parents too have graciously helped us out too with the whole wedding costs. However I am still saving so I can have enough money to pay for our wedding if there is ever a doubt that my parents can't help out any longer.

Don't stress and let those SILs of yours get you bummed! You can do anything as long as you have the hear and dedication to do it. It just sounds like they are jealous and are trying to things up. Keep your head up! Hang in there!

 

[princessblueeyzes]

LuluLovesDisney I love your tag it is perfect.

 

[JJClemson]

Hey, try not to let your SIL upset you. Easier said than done right. I know how you feel, all of my extended family has money, lots and lots of money. It is very annoying watching them "spa" all day while I babysit their children for $10/ hr. I made the decision to go to graduate school and I am now in $60,000 debt. It sucks, but getting this degree was really important to me. My parents are giving us $20,000 for the wedding (I know what you're thinking, I should use that money to pay off my student loans, but this money is strictly for wedding purposes). DF's family was also originally giving us $20,000 for the wedding, but they backed out! We are still having the DFTW, but we're are trying to make it as cheap as possible.

My advice would be to do whatever you feel is right. If you cannot afford the DFTW wedding now, maybe have a smaller wedding then do a Disney vow renewal? I was considering this option too. How about telling your snobby SIL to pay for the wedding? Just kidding.

Best of luck to you in making your decision

 

[Janet2k]

Here’s another perspective…

If you don’t want to spend the time, energy, or money the first time around, you could always plan a vow renewal for your 5th, 10th, 15th, 20th, 50th, 100th, or any number in-between. You could have a simple wedding when you first say "I Do" and then a blowout affair at some point in the near or distant future.

That is what my husband and I chose to do. It was well worth the wait.

 

[hiwaygal]

Aww, Lulu!! You sound so frustrated! And I would be too...

If you want the DFTW, you will have to find a way to do it. I know how hard that can be.

Neither DH nor I are savers...the only way we were able to afford our DFTW was we had some $$$ left over from the sale of his house. Because my budget was very tight (and would not allow a custom wedding), I just made my peace with that and we had an intimate wedding. It was just me and DH.

Try to save as much as you can...talk to your parents and see if they are willing to "pitch in" a little (you might be surprised). And if you decide to "borrow", try them first (no interest ). I wouldn't take out a huge loan for a wedding...you can do that for grad school.

I think there are lots of ways to afford a DFTW...it just might not be the big "to-do" you have in mind right now.

Try looking at an intimate (with some extra touches) as they are much cheaper...and then don't invite the evil SIL's!

Good luck, hon...and we're always here if you need to vent!

 

[RangerPooh]

DH and I are both grad students and were working part time when we decided on a DLR FTW. We are not always the saver types so saving was a chore at times. My parents didn't contribute more than a couple thousand dollars (~$4,000 at the most). But this was spent on things for the wedding including my dress, photography, etc. We paid for the rest. To help with the cost we invited only those that we wanted to attend. This meant that we told our parents that people we've never met didn't need to attend for their sake as we were paying for it. We also chose to have our wedding on a weekday as minimums are cheaper, plus we shopped around for vendors (photography, DJ, and a bagpiper) as Disney quoted us more than we found them for. Then we also decided to select an off peak season period to help keep costs down for our guests as well. We made our own favors and went minimalist for decorations, using thre natural beauty of the location.

A DTW on a budget is entirely possible, it just might take some dedicated saving and flexbility for chosing dates. When priced, a FTW was much more affordable than a wedding elsewhere in Ca. that we had been considering.

So just block out your SIL rude comments as maybe she's just jealous or doesn't value saving for things that you really want. She'll be eating cake at your wedding when you have it, or perhaps she'll be lookin at the pictures, if you chose to not invite her. Either way you're wedding will be held in te location you desire.

 

[Sunkissed]

All this advice is great! When we first started talking about the "big day" there was no question we would do it at WDW. We have a trip set for this Nov/Dec, but it will be our last until we begin our planning visits. DF is definitely not a saver, but I quickly became one when I had to save up for our first trip to WDW, which was a birthday surprise for him. We're both still in school (and I am planning on law school), so that limits what we can save, but we've been together so long that neither of us minds waiting a little longer to make sure that we can afford what we truly want. Also, we have been talking about a "Plan B", which is a still-Disney-themed but more local event. By working out the details now, we'll be in a better position to make the big decisions and have a "big picture" mentality, without scrambling or (hopefully) being caught up in emotion.

ETA: One thing I learned from a friend is to keep a pictoral journal. I go through the different bridal magazines and sign up for catalogues, that way I can cut out anything I like and put it in the journal. By having a representation of what I want, I can then shop around for a reasonable price. For example, my dream dress costs $3000. If I can swing it, great, but if I not, I can always take the pic shopping with me and try to find something comparable but cheaper.