Homeschool and high school

[hulagirl87]

DD is having a hard time at school, not just with the school work, but with a lot of "friend" drama. It's very hard to see her so upset and sad all the time. I have gotten her in to dance as I feel like maybe if she makes a friend outside of school that will help. She is also going to be volunteering at our local YMCA in the child watch area. I'm just wondering if it is too late to homeschool. Is there anybody here that has decided to homeschool in the high school years? Thank you so much!

 

[Rogue1677x]

My husband was homeschooled from 3rd grade on, so it's definitely not the same situation and it was a good fit in his family as the school was dumbing him down (ex: he was doing long division upon entering Kindergarten and got disciplined in school for doing things that the other kids weren't learning; his sister was reading novels in Kindergarten).

He said homeschooling took a lot of patience on his mom's part as she was teacher and principal. She took them out for for learning experiences like going to science museums, etc.

I guess it comes down to what the curriculum is, does your daughter have the discipline to do the work, etc.

Having the high school drama with friends and struggling with grades is tough (my daughter went through that and basically had no friends at all because everyone used her and ditched her at the end). I found it especially important to do mental health check-ins with her to make sure she was doing OK.

 

[lanejudy]

I don't have homeschool experience or advice, but wondering if she is at a new school this year? Maybe new 9th grader moved up from middle school? In my experience, a lot of middle school friendships change once the kids hit high school. They aren't in the same classes, maybe don't even get to see each other for lunch, there are a lot more "new" kids to make friends. If she likes dance, that's great but are the dance kids at her same high school or different schools? I'd encourage her to get involved with a club or activity through the school to make new friendships, someone to each lunch with or say hi passing in the halls. There may be a dance team or club, drama/theater always likes to have dance kids for their musicals, yearbook staff, etc.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Not me personally, but I have a friend who was homeschooled from at least 7th-10th grades. She came back in 11th and did fine.

If you don't feel confident teaching the subject matter, there are public online options nowadays.

I would consider your DD's temperament and find out what she'd like to do.

 

[SteveH]

My wife is a teacher for their online division which is part of the home school program in our district. Each area is different but I would say check to see if your District has an online. It's similar to home school but the curriculum is managed by the District not the parents. My wife also volunteers for the schools dance and other activities which are similar to other schools, but the kids are much better behaved.

 

[sam_gordon]

It might be too late, but I will always advocate that kids get involved in SOME club/sport at school. Could be drama (assuming she likes to dance), chess club, or band. Even if she's not athletic, if there's a sport she enjoys, maybe she could be a manager or statistician.

Or, maybe it's too late to do that. You don't say what grade in HS, but I would think only if it's her senior year it's too late to start.

Just my opinion.

 

[TwoMisfits]

It is not too late to homeschool.
It's really never too late to homeschool.
The only question is does your daughter want to be homeschooled and do you want to homeschool her?
It's a commitment for you both, and only you know if you both can.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

My sister-in-law started online school either in her sophomore or junior year of high school I can't remember. Aside from her always sorta of struggling with academics the peer issue became the biggest problem.

I don't think it's too late to start that in high school but I also think that it may not be the ultimate resolution. It can be a short term resolution in order to fulfill an educational requirement but doesn't necessarily address either the fall out from peer issues or if there are other issues existing.

Not all kids do well in the public in school environment. But it's also looking at if there are things that can be done to help with that such as counseling or finding other peers who have the same interests as her but also has varied interests too.

I think the dance is a great part but would probably go further if you think you want her to make friends I would look for a school program that has that level of interactiveness not just online but in person. She can become just as isolated with homeschooling depending on the one chosen.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Having the high school drama with friends

I think this part happens to many people some just more damaging to others.

My viewpoint is I wouldn't look to homeschool or online school to be the solution to this issue. Not because it can't be of tremendous help because it really can be but it can also just be a way to move the issue elsewhere without actually addressing it.

Kids may experience self-esteem issues for example with their peers but does taking them out of in person public school alone address that, like you said you checked in with your daughter on her mental health, are there actions being done that work in step with the adjustment to homeschool.

struggling with grades is tough

Agreed and I would say my viewpoint mirrors the peer issue. I wouldn't look to homeschool or online school to be the solution to this issue without having done something or tried to do something before it. Again not because it can't be of tremendous help but it's looking at what method may have been done before that such as the student talking with the teachers for help, discussing what the struggles may be (like is a learning disability not yet diagnosed) and more. I stopped being really good at math at about 7th grade, by 8th grade my brain switched to excelling in english, social studies and history. It didn't mean I was the worst at math but I really struggled with physics and calc type stuff, it just didn't click to me despite being one of the best math students in elementary school (certainly the best female in my grade levels throughout elementary school).

But that's okay, I just figured out where my struggle was and switching to home school or online school wasn't really going to improve that math front. However, if all or a majority of the subjects were hard for me that's a totally different situation and would mean a different approach to learning what may be going on. It's important to know that for the OP's daughter because it would affect their life if they went to high education as well as on the job front. My other sister-in-law has an aerospace engineering degree but has mild dyslexia and does not enjoy reading for leisure and absolutely not as a requirement, she can still excel and do well obviously but it takes understanding what the issues may be.

 

[piglet1979]

You should look to see if there are any homeschooling groups in your area and see of they can give you any information on homeschooling. They would be a great resource. I have a friend in NC that homeschools her kids that are now in high school. One is actually taking college classes instead of the homeschooling curriculum. She talks about her homeschool group a lot.

Also if she is able to take college classes, this might be an option too. DD will graduate high school this year with about a year of college completed that we didn't have to pay for because she was in high school. I have seen others have an associates degree when they graduate high school. In Ohio it is called CCP (College Credit Plus). I am not sure it is called the same in other states. The classes count for high school and college.

If she is able, maybe try seeing if she can do band. At least in my school and my kids school, those students seem the most accepting and kind students. I never played an instrument until I was in high school. The triangle and the cymbals was all I was able to do. I also twirled the flag in marching band. DD was in the marching band playing the clarient for 9th and 10th grades and then didn't do it her 11th grade year. Last November she decided to take majorette lessons (never twirled before) and made the team for her 12th grade year. Now she wants to do in college. Drama club was also a great place to be accepted. You don't have to be on stage to be apart of the drama club. I am deathly afraid of talking in front of people so I did the make up and helped build the sets.

 

[Rogue1677x]

I think this part happens to many people some just more damaging to others.

My viewpoint is I wouldn't look to homeschool or online school to be the solution to this issue. Not because it can't be of tremendous help because it really can be but it can also just be a way to move the issue elsewhere without actually addressing it.

Kids may experience self-esteem issues for example with their peers but does taking them out of in person public school alone address that, like you said you checked in with your daughter on her mental health, are there actions being done that work in step with the adjustment to homeschool.


Agreed and I would say my viewpoint mirrors the peer issue. I wouldn't look to homeschool or online school to be the solution to this issue without having done something or tried to do something before it. Again not because it can't be of tremendous help but it's looking at what method may have been done before that such as the student talking with the teachers for help, discussing what the struggles may be (like is a learning disability not yet diagnosed) and more. I stopped being really good at math at about 7th grade, by 8th grade my brain switched to excelling in english, social studies and history. It didn't mean I was the worst at math but I really struggled with physics and calc type stuff, it just didn't click to me despite being one of the best math students in elementary school (certainly the best female in my grade levels throughout elementary school).

But that's okay, I just figured out where my struggle was and switching to home school or online school wasn't really going to improve that math front. However, if all or a majority of the subjects were hard for me that's a totally different situation and would mean a different approach to learning what may be going on. It's important to know that for the OP's daughter because it would affect their life if they went to high education as well as on the job front. My other sister-in-law has an aerospace engineering degree but has mild dyslexia and does not enjoy reading for leisure and absolutely not as a requirement, she can still excel and do well obviously but it takes understanding what the issues may be.

You definitely bring up very good points. In fact, I wasn't diagnosed with a type of ADD until I was in college and it was only just confirmed (now in my late 40's).

 

[anniemae]

I know people who have their kids do online school, which is different than homeschooling. I think it's kind of like how remote learning was during covid. They all "zoom" (or something similar) into a class and a teacher teaches. It's just nobody is in the classroom. They have academic support and I guess it's like a real school.

 

[holden]

Our DD17 struggled with public school (academically and socially). We moved her to a private school thinking smaller classes and more individual attention from the teacher would help. It did not.

Eventually she wound up doing online school her junior year. It has been the best thing for her. She attends her classes, does her work and is finished her academic day early enough to have some down time, go on hikes and then go to work a few days a week. She loves it!

 

[tetera]

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[hulagirl87]

It is not too late to homeschool.
It's really never too late to homeschool.
The only question is does your daughter want to be homeschooled and do you want to homeschool her?
It's a commitment for you both, and only you know if you both can.

she asks every day if she can be homeschooled. I tell her that I don't feel qualified to do that. I struggled in high school myself, with math and science, and those are the subjects that she is really struggling with right now too.

 

[hulagirl87]

I don't have homeschool experience or advice, but wondering if she is at a new school this year? Maybe new 9th grader moved up from middle school? In my experience, a lot of middle school friendships change once the kids hit high school. They aren't in the same classes, maybe don't even get to see each other for lunch, there are a lot more "new" kids to make friends. If she likes dance, that's great but are the dance kids at her same high school or different schools? I'd encourage her to get involved with a club or activity through the school to make new friendships, someone to each lunch with or say hi passing in the halls. There may be a dance team or club, drama/theater always likes to have dance kids for their musicals, yearbook staff, etc.

she isn't new to the school district, but is a freshman this year, so new school building. We were hoping that going from grade school to high school would stop a lot of the drama as they went from being on "teams" in grade school to all starting at a level playing field in high school, but so far this year is worse than grade school

 

[TwoMisfits]

she asks every day if she can be homeschooled. I tell her that I don't feel qualified to do that. I struggled in high school myself, with math and science, and those are the subjects that she is really struggling with right now too.

The thing with homeschooling is you can outsource what you don't know...the dirty secret is almost NO homeschool parent teaches every high school subject themselves.

Private tutors, local homeschool classes, community college classes, the great courses online videos, free online classes (like Khan Academy, https://www.ck12.org/teacher/), paid online classes (see Outschool, Rosetta Stone, ), etc, all are available for you to have someone else cover math and science.

And the nice thing about homeschooling...if she is struggling in math and science, she can take her time and redo lessons until she knows the concept. For many options (not community college, but others like Khan), you don't have to test and work on a schedule like school - you can have a normal yearlong class take 15-18 months...it's almost certain another year long class might only take her 3 months, so it all works out.

I mean, Math doesn't get better if you're falling further and further behind. So, she may need some time to catch back up.

 

[barkley]

i'll echo looking into the online options some states/districts offer. I know both teachers and students that have found the experience to be much more enriching. it allows for some self paced instruction so if a subject is a breeze for the student they can knock it out and focus on another more challenging (or personally interesting subject). if they need reinforcement/help with a subject they have the ability to spend more time/get individual assistance. as far as the social aspect-the teachers I know who teach in this manner say that they observe some great interaction (and far less of the drama) between their students with the portions of their classes that they do in the zoom fashion.

I could never homeschool. I have degrees, certifications and credentialing for both early childhood and k-12 multiple subjects but when my kids had issues with education (at times in both private and public schools) I knew it was not within my capability to serve as a teacher to them. kudos to those that can do it successfully (I've known some spectacular successes along with some spectacular failures-and not failures in the academic sense but in stunting social skills which unless-i feel-a homeschooler has an experienced and skilled homeschool support community to work and interact with can be a big concern).

explore what is available to you (look to your state's department of education and you can find out what options you have).

 

[pookybean]

im thinking of heading down this road with my daughter. she is in 11th grade now and every year i start out hopeful that things will be better and they never are (socially and academically). I think she just needs to be out of that environment. she is in a practicum through school, so im looking at how we can make the districts online academy work. it's scary, but so is sending her out to "battle" every morning

 

[footballmouse]

My youngest son did a different kind of high school for his Jr & Sr year. There was an alternative school that was opening up, it was actually in an old school supply store. He went for the morning hours 8-12 and then he was responsible for finishing the day online at home. Once he turned 18 in his Sr. year, he had the option to do his requirements fully online (which he did) and he was able to hold down a job since he did his school work in the evening. This was the perfect set-up for him. He has ADD so it was hard for him to stay focused for the entire school day. This allowed him to participate in a school setting for 1/2 the day and then he was able to work at his own pace for the remainder of the day. In his traditional high school, he was able to do 1/2 days part of his Soph. year but they said he couldn't have that schedule all year. He did really well during that 1/2 of the year so that's why I looked into switching him. Good luck. Have a child unhappy and depressed their high school years is hard for everyone.