So funny.....I have a 5th grade boy, 2nd grade boy, k daughter and 4 yr old son AND we also live in NY! But I know you aren't talking about me.....we are so lucky to be so blessed!
But, I can give you some ideas! Nerf guns are a huge hit with all my boys, and many sets are sold as a two-pack which makes it tons of fun! My older two boys love to skateboard in our driveway and you can pick up regular skate boards for $15 or so at
walmart or
amazon. They also love legos, k'nex (which have really good sales and you can get a set for as little as $20), bakugan and the army sets that TRU sells.
My daughter is totally into her baby dolls and barbies and her AG dolls. We bought quite a few Our Generation dolls ($20 or so at Target) for birthday gifts this year for her friends and everyone loved them. She also loves her barbies and any kind of craft kit.
My four year old used to love Thomas the train stuff and Cars, but now he really plays with his older brothers and their stuff. He got Spongebob and star wars legos sets, a radio flyer
scooter (around $30) and quite a few playmobil sets. You can get playmobil for as little as $5-6 for the small sets to the much larger sets. I like to buy my 4yr old this kind of stuff, b/c he loves to play with it, but also b/c my older kids also enjoy it, and I find that they all play together. Its very open-ended play and he is learning valuable play-skills from his older siblings. Matchbox cars, plastic dinosaurs and arts and crafts types of stuff are always a hit!
My 5th grader is also starting to get into clothes, and will often ask for certain brands for his birthday, but Christmas around here usually means toys! And maybe b/c he has younger siblings, but my 5th grader still plays a lot with his toys. Also, there is also refurbished ipod shuffles for $39 dollars or so on the apple website...if you know they have acess to a computer...that and an itunes gc would be cool.
Good luck and have fun! You are helping to make happy memories for your friends children and you will touch your friend's heart in a way that he will always remember. No parent EVER forgets when someone has helped their children.