Has this ever happened to you ?

MKhead72

Have you ever stopped to think, and forgot to star
Joined
Feb 6, 2007
Messages
313
On our most recent trip to WDW, we decided to take our nephew (who has never been to the world) with us for the 3 days of play. Mind you that his family dont really do vacations. We asked his parents if he could go and it would be no cost to them, they said sure. So thats what we did. We stayed in Orlando for a week and also did many other things, besides the 3 days. It all started off pretty good, but by the end of the week, Im sorry to say, I couldn't wait to take him home.Nothing was good enough for him, it was too hot, it was too crowded, it was raining to hard, he didnt like the rides, etc... ( the list could go on and on ). We have two teenagers of our own that we have taken many times and never complained about anything. I thought we were doing something good for him, but it ended up biting us in the butt. Now, I dont know if we will ever take anybody else with us again because with him being miserable, it almost, and I did say almost ruined our trip. So he can now stay at home, play his video games, eat his cheeto's on his bean-bag chair, where he is most comfortable and we will go and have great fun like we always do. So my question is this : Has something like this ever happened to you ?
 
I once went with my best friend and his wife, and she complained ENDLESSLY about everything - too hot, too expensive, food not good enough, etc. They argued inceasantly throughout the entire trip - even that long 14-hour drive home to Baltimore.

Argh. I complain a lot myself, but I like to think I only complain about legitimate things; complaining about how hot it is in Orlando in June, or how expensive the hotel is when you knew to the penny how much it was going to cost before you ever left home, tends to make me say,

"Well, DUH!!"
 
I have read about this a ton on these boards. Folks try to do something nice, and share the Disney magic and it backfires. Often times it is a grandparent they are taking, and they are not used to the grandparent's pace, and the grandparent is not used to having things their own way. Other times people go with another family and their schedules really conflict, and they end up fighting. Sadly, when folks bring extended family it often backfires.

My biggest advice to anyone contemplating a trip with anyone other than immediate family is to give it a trial run for a SHORT period, say a long weekend, at a cheaper venue. If you get along then great go for Disney.

Also, we often think that people's personalities will change at Disney. They will catch the magic and their negativeness will disappear. Those who love to sleep in will jump at the chance to make rope drop each day. Siblings will miraculously quit fighting. Parents who never got along will fall in love again. Personalities are not changed at Disney. They are magnified within close living quarters.
 
No but it is a big chancce to take when taking some one else that does not flow well with your family... we have vacationed several times with friends ( the same family all the time ) but that is a whole different thing. We generally have the same interests, likes and dislikes... and are comfortable enough with eachother that we can do our own thing too. But when you take a child you really are taking your chances...big time....you are stuck with them permanently till home....But I do know this...if a kid isn't used to your "way" or does not flow well with your family it can be a big pain. Especially if it is a child...it becomes more of a burden than a blessing. You spend so much time biting your tongue, gritting yoour teeth, headaches and all.....(or at least I do ) ....
Which is too bad, b/c he will never know the value of what you guys did for him....except maybe he is older?
He was probably really excited at first too I bet?! Any kid would be.
Oh well...good intentions = good learning experience - I say- I had to learn the hard way ( with week long neice and nephew visits etc...)
 

I have read about this a ton on these boards. Folks try to do something nice, and share the Disney magic and it backfires. Often times it is a grandparent they are taking, and they are not used to the grandparent's pace, and the grandparent is not used to having things their own way. Other times people go with another family and their schedules really conflict, and they end up fighting. Sadly, when folks bring extended family it often backfires.

My biggest advice to anyone contemplating a trip with anyone other than immediate family is to give it a trial run for a SHORT period, say a long weekend, at a cheaper venue. If you get along then great go for Disney.

Also, we often think that people's personalities will change at Disney. They will catch the magic and their negativeness will disappear. Those who love to sleep in will jump at the chance to make rope drop each day. Siblings will miraculously quit fighting. Parents who never got along will fall in love again. Personalities are not changed at Disney. They are magnified within close living quarters.

EXACTLY!!!! The whole post...especially the last sentence...people do get weary and sometimes it is too close for comfort!
 
I've had several bad experiences when taking someone other than my immediate family (hubby & kids). I think the problem happens when you have other adults (or wanna-be adults) who have their own opinions about how to spend their time at WDW. With my hubby & kids, they have a SIGNIFICANT motivation to keep on the schedule/pace I set for us (i.e. if Mom isn't happy, then NO ONE is happy!).

The WORST two experiences were when we went with our best friends and their kids (we're still friends, we just agree to split up at the parks and meet for meals/pool time/etc..!) and with my in-laws... errr... I still get annoyed when I think of all the trouble I had with THEM! They're the kind of people who show up at the park around noon, pick up a map... then decide their hungry... but lets just walk around and see what we want to eat... hey... that ride looks good, let's head over there.... now wait... I was hungry, so let's go back towards where we were, I think there was something to eat there.... ah... let's check the map... so what if we're stopping dead in our tracks in the MIDDLE of Main Street... and on and on!!! For a Disney obsessed planner like me, you can see how this is LESS THAN FUN!

So, now, it's me, DH and kiddos only! I can keep them in line with just "the look"!
 
ha poor you, that sounds so deja vu...only I am afraid to post my " bad experiences" for fear that the other parties may join dis someday.....and when I first joined ( actually my husband did- ) we used our real last name and it cannot be changed!

I agree, it is just good to go with your own family, we like to do what we do. I find we get a much more satisfying visit when we can do what we want instead of wasting time wandering the world! It is such a waste!

You were prob ready to kill!

We are 6 big and we like to all do all the rides and attarctions...we have no time to poke and think and decide...we just do it! Getter done! lol
 
LOL... :rotfl: i am an obssesed disney planner myself! we are going by ourselves for the first time this december, and we are excited to finally get to do things "our way"! i guess it really depends on what you want the focus of your vacation time to be. if you want to focus on being with family then you have to let a lot of things go because everyone will have different interest. Disneyworld probably isn't the best place to have "quality time" with extended family unless you already know that your vacation interests are the same.
 
i have had several experiences where ive just wanted to kill the other memebers of the party lol
it happens.

D.
 
On our most recent trip to WDW, we decided to take our nephew (who has never been to the world) with us for the 3 days of play. Mind you that his family dont really do vacations. We asked his parents if he could go and it would be no cost to them, they said sure. So thats what we did. We stayed in Orlando for a week and also did many other things, besides the 3 days. It all started off pretty good, but by the end of the week, Im sorry to say, I couldn't wait to take him home.Nothing was good enough for him, it was too hot, it was too crowded, it was raining to hard, he didnt like the rides, etc... ( the list could go on and on ). We have two teenagers of our own that we have taken many times and never complained about anything. I thought we were doing something good for him, but it ended up biting us in the butt. Now, I dont know if we will ever take anybody else with us again because with him being miserable, it almost, and I did say almost ruined our trip. So he can now stay at home, play his video games, eat his cheeto's on his bean-bag chair, where he is most comfortable and we will go and have great fun like we always do. So my question is this : Has something like this ever happened to you ?

Sorry things didn't work out the way you dreamed. I think I would have a similar experience if I took my niece and nephew. They are around the same age as my DD, but their parents are little looser with there money than I am with my kids. I am not saying they are spoiled, but they would expect to get a lot of souviners(sp) and snacks whenever they wanted. I would love to be able to do that with my own kids, but simply can't afford to.

and with my in-laws... errr... I still get annoyed when I think of all the trouble I had with THEM! They're the kind of people who show up at the park around noon, pick up a map... then decide their hungry... but lets just walk around and see what we want to eat... hey... that ride looks good, let's head over there.... now wait... I was hungry, so let's go back towards where we were, I think there was something to eat there.... ah... let's check the map... so what if we're stopping dead in our tracks in the MIDDLE of Main Street... and on and on!!! For a Disney obsessed planner like me, you can see how this is LESS THAN FUN!

Ha that sounds like my in-laws and my parents for the most part.

In the past I have always gone with my 3 best friends, who happen to be sisters. It has always been a blast, but we all want to do different things at different times. They really like the parades but I hate to wait 2+ for a good seat. I'm more of a hey there is a parade in 10 minutes lets see if there is any viewing space left, if not oh well. I love Epcot, especially world showcase, they find it really boring. Another sister loves Toontown and another dislikes it. It's a matter of compromise and spending a couple of hours doing something your not 100% enjoying to be able to spend a couple of hours doing something you love is a fair and good trade off IMO.

Last Dec I went for the first time without them, Just DH & Me. It was really nice, but DH & I had issues with what we each wanted to do. So we compromised, isn't that what a marriage is anyway.

This Dec we are taking the kids, Us and noone else. We'll see how things go. DD has expressed the desire to do certain things we haven't done before, so that will throw us off your proven Disney strategy. It's vacation, so go with the flow I guess
 
On our most recent trip to WDW, we decided to take our nephew (who has never been to the world) with us for the 3 days of play. Mind you that his family dont really do vacations. We asked his parents if he could go and it would be no cost to them, they said sure. So thats what we did. We stayed in Orlando for a week and also did many other things, besides the 3 days. It all started off pretty good, but by the end of the week, Im sorry to say, I couldn't wait to take him home.Nothing was good enough for him, it was too hot, it was too crowded, it was raining to hard, he didnt like the rides, etc... ( the list could go on and on ). We have two teenagers of our own that we have taken many times and never complained about anything. I thought we were doing something good for him, but it ended up biting us in the butt. Now, I dont know if we will ever take anybody else with us again because with him being miserable, it almost, and I did say almost ruined our trip. So he can now stay at home, play his video games, eat his cheeto's on his bean-bag chair, where he is most comfortable and we will go and have great fun like we always do. So my question is this : Has something like this ever happened to you ?

Yes it has happen to us. I took my niece with us 9 yrs ago and she didn't really complain but she wouldn't do anything. She was tired all the time wouldn't go on anything. I came out and told her I would never take her back.
Well she is 18 now and still wants me to take her back, so maybe I'll give it a try one of these days. I am sure she out grew it. Hopefully.:rotfl2:
 
Yep! This has happened to me before. DH and I sometimes go places with my parents. We've done Disney a few times as well as comic conventions. DH and I usually wind up arguing b/c my parents like to keep a fast pace and he can't keep up due to his arthritis. Plus, he's really tall and gets squished in the back of the car. We even did MNSSHP with the last year. Needless to say, we're doing it this year w/o them so we can relax a bit and enjoy ourselves. I love my parents but they do love to walk quickly and not take breaks.
 
On our most recent trip to WDW, we decided to take our nephew (who has never been to the world) with us for the 3 days of play. Mind you that his family dont really do vacations.

I believe this is the root of the problem. I'm convinced from my family's experiences and from listening to others that vacationing well is a learned skill, and those who don't vacation with their kids starting when their kids are young run the risk of having some really bad experiences later on.
While WDW is magical, you can't expect people to magically go with the flow and enjoy themselves. They have to have an idea of what to expect, what to plan for, and what to "let go."
Best advice my pediatrician ever gave me was to take the kids on trips right away. DD has been travelling since she was 5 weeks old, and she loves the adventure and excitement of every trip.
You were brave and generous to take your nephew, but next time, take a seasoned traveler! :)
 
We frequently take our grown sons and their wives/girlfriends on vacation. A few years ago, our youngest DS, then 23, was taking the young woman he had been dating for about a year. Trip was planned months in advance. We had 2 2-br condos at OKW booked. We were sharing our condo with youngest DS and his girlfriend while other 2 DS's/wives were sharing the other. A few weeks before we are set to go, my DS tells me that he wants to break up with the girlfriend. I told him I would do physical harm to him if he did it before this vacation as everything was planned and paid for. So he didn't break up with her and she went on this vacation but it was the biggest mistake I've ever made. They argued, she cried. All of the time. And we were sharing the condo with them. All of the meals, including the wonderful Victoria & Albert's, were ruined. If they weren't fighting, they were ignoring each other. They officially broke up the day we returned from the trip. DH had never cared for this girlfriend so after this trip, he made it a rule that we pre-screen all future guests before committing to the obligation of babysitting them for a week.
 
We brought my parents and my nephew this pasy May for my Dad's 60th birthday.

Problem One:
My parents hated the trip! Too much walking and activity for them I quess. Every time I look at them I saw sad tired faces. Which I could not understand because #1- I planned rest time for them by themselved AND #2- I cannot tell you how many times before and during the trip we told them to stay back/relax if the schedule is too much for them. They never lookes so unhappy. My husband could not stand how they slowed us down.

Problem Two:
My 9 year old nephew thinks the world revolves around him. He constantly asked when he was going to go a ride that HE wanted to go on. He would ask over and over. I have two small kids that cannot go on all the big stuff yet. Which made things really hard. My poor kids spent more time waiting outside of rides that my nephew wanted to go on. We would have said no to the kid BUT he just broke us down, asking us over and over.

We will never go back with my parents and would not bring another child until our kids are big enough to do all the same things. It is too hard when there are kids of very different ages/interests and older adults that are slow and get sleepy fast!;)
 
Yes, it happened to us too! We went with my mom last two years ago, and she just didn't enjoy it very much. So...I was trying to keep her happy, and trying to keep my go,go, go husband happy, and it just didn't work. When we told my mom we were going to go back this year, she said something like "I can't understand why you'd want to go back *there!" lol That's okay Mom, you don't have to understand! ;)
 
I'm starting to get worried. I'm in my 50's and I LOVE going to WDW. I hope I don't become the "parent" who tires too easily and hates the crowds, kids, etc!!!!! However, I do like hearing "when I took my mother"...... We are still taking our adult children (and next trip will include our first grandchild) and paying for the trips so I look forward to the day when they are taking us!!!

Maybe I should start going 3 times a year instead of 2 in case I am running out of good years!!!!!!
 
I'm starting to get worried. I'm in my 50's and I LOVE going to WDW. I hope I don't become the "parent" who tires too easily and hates the crowds, kids, etc!!!!! However, I do like hearing "when I took my mother"...... We are still taking our adult children (and next trip will include our first grandchild) and paying for the trips so I look forward to the day when they are taking us!!!

Maybe I should start going 3 times a year instead of 2 in case I am running out of good years!!!!!!

I'm sure you'll be a trooper. I'm in my early 40's, and I like to just sit on the curb on Main Street and people watch sometimes. If people would just go with the idea that everyone can sit when they want, do what they want, and not do when they want, then all would be good. We're going to WDW with two other families in January, and we've already established the schedule with the caveat that anyone is welcome but not required or expected to join us!
 
My cousin and I are planning on taking her granddaughter and my grandniece to WDW in '09. Well, we still have college aged boys to we decided to turn it into a magical gathering. We have invited both of her boys, and the granddaughter will have a almost 2 yo borther by then. My DS, grandniece and her parents, plus there will be an addition by then have also been invited. So I also have asked my mother, who can do nothing without her DS (my divorced brother), so he might be joining us and his son, who willl be almost 8. So the children will range from age 18 mo. to 7.

It should be very interesting because I am planning on only meeting for the group gathering and one meal a day, unless they want to do it differently.

:grouphug:
 





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