Has anyone successfully helped your child lose weight?

[DisnyMama]

Hi there! My 14 year old Ds pediatrician really likes Weight Watchers and we went together for a while and he got really good at the whole points thing and was losing. He did get a note from the doctor. After about 2 months he got tired of having to constantly count points and and quit. We need to get back to WW very badly. The doctor was very concerned about not making weight an issue so that we don't damage his self asteem or cause him to become weight obsessed.

I noticed that someone else posted about their child having to make weight for football. Is this just for POP Warner or does this go for High School football also. My DS is in the 9th grade and one of the football coaches has already aproached him about trying out for the JV team for next Fall. Do they have a certain weight limit in high school? He has talked about playing for years and if this is something that has to happen then we need to talk about it and put a plan of action (family plan of action) together now.

Thanks.

 

[sue1013]

DsnyMama the weight rules are only for Pop Warner. Once they get to high school there are not weight limits. Depending on the position he plays they may want them heavier. Which can be a problem also. My DS could not gain weight all through HS no matter how hard he tried. Now he's in college and has finally been able to put on some weight.

 

[cruisnfamily]

I think that she possibly means 53 inches?

Ooops, I misread! I took 53" to mean 5'3". Sorry!

 

[DisneyLovingMama]

I don't know if you count calories out loud or make a big deal about calories regularly, but if you are, perhaps easing up would help. Don't make a big deal/remove a snack if she has a Capri Sun or gummy bear, but serve no rice or potatoes for dinner. Make it more transparent to her, instead of always reading the calories, fat content on the food. Then, wait and see if she sprouts up during puberty - most do. (Also, I second getting her thyroid checked).

I only say this because of what my sister and I went through. I started getting overweight when I was your DD's age and my Mom put me on all these diets, programs, etc. I went along with them to please her, but was always sneaking food, trading lunches, etc, when she wasn't around. And, as I grew older, I really started developing a complex about food/weight and would use it "to get back at" my Mom. It got to the point that I could only comfort myself with the illicit food I had stashed in my room. I am now 31 and obese, with 100 pounds to lose (well, 96... )

My sister had the same pressure on her. She's now bulimic and been hospitalized with complications of bulimia several times. She still purges when things get too stressful.

Good luck - I know you want what's best for your child, but maybe making sure she continues to know there's more to life than food and calorie counting is more important to her overall mental health.

 

[MamaLema]

To the OP- sounds like you're doing everything right

 

[Mom21]

I appreciate everyones input. We are going to keep working on this. I am a bit puzzled about those that suggested she is getting too much sugar. Her breakfast cereal is 4 grams. According to the nutritionist anything under 7 is great for breakfast. Mybe I wasn't clear on the fact that her ice cream is the sugar free/guilt free kind. If she is having a poor eating day then she is only allowed a sugar free popsicle for 10 calories. The only sugar she is getting is the 100 calorie snacks once a day (not everyday--maybe 5 days a week). Her nutritionist thought this would be better than a piece of fruit. Actually less sugar (although not the natural type) and would make her feel more satisfied. So where else can I cut out the sugar? Also maybe once a week she has a snack at church or her teacher gives out a piece of candy as a reward. Not much I can do about this nor would I want to. Her eye dr gave her a sucker the other day and I told her to save it until after dinner. She forgot about it and hasn't asked for it in 5 days so it went in the trash. thanks again everyone. This is going to be a long road, I can tell.

 

[Mom21]

I don't know if you count calories out loud or make a big deal about calories regularly, but if you are, perhaps easing up would help. Don't make a big deal/remove a snack if she has a Capri Sun or gummy bear, but serve no rice or potatoes for dinner. Make it more transparent to her, instead of always reading the calories, fat content on the food. Then, wait and see if she sprouts up during puberty - most do. (Also, I second getting her thyroid checked).

I only say this because of what my sister and I went through. I started getting overweight when I was your DD's age and my Mom put me on all these diets, programs, etc. I went along with them to please her, but was always sneaking food, trading lunches, etc, when she wasn't around. And, as I grew older, I really started developing a complex about food/weight and would use it "to get back at" my Mom. It got to the point that I could only comfort myself with the illicit food I had stashed in my room. I am now 31 and obese, with 100 pounds to lose (well, 96... )

My sister had the same pressure on her. She's now bulimic and been hospitalized with complications of bulimia several times. She still purges when things get too stressful.

Good luck - I know you want what's best for your child, but maybe making sure she continues to know there's more to life than food and calorie counting is more important to her overall mental health.

I am so sorry for you. This is exactly what I don't want to happen to her. We are really trying to make it about health. I tell her junk in---junk out. It does help that she is althletic and wants her body to do things that at this weight it can't. She knows her cholesterol was high (now normal thank goodness) and that diabetes is a factor, so she knows about the health aspects. I just couldn't live with myself if she had diabetes at a young age when it was something I could prevent. I also had eating disorders, although to a milder extent, and don't want her to have that. Good luck to you and your sister.

 

[Mom21]

Oh yeah, one more thing about the sneaking of food. My dd doesn't sneak food. That isn't to say that she sometimes doesn't have things I am not aware of, but she just doesn't sneak. In fact, she will tell me when she gets home from school if she got "double meat" that day. She usually only does it on chicken nugget day and taco day.....LOL. So I've learned not to offer her the option to buy those days but just ask her what she wants to pack. She prefers to pack anyway. She only buys as a convenience for me. For some reason (I've never required it), she will ask me before she has a snack 99% of the time. I'll let her know if it is ok or give her a time that she may have it. For example today I made muffins (sugar free-low fat) while she was at church. When she got home she asked for one at lunch. I told her that when she was done with math homework, piano, and reading she could have one. She forgot until about 2 hours later. She then went into the kitchen and yelled out to me in the living room that she was having her muffin. I don't think sneaking is an issue and I don't want to make it where it has to be...KWIM? Thanks again for all the help. It's hard being a mommy.

 

[monsterkitty]

I'm puzzled here. I just entered your DD's weight and height on the BMI calculator on WebMD. It says she is within normal BMI and weight ranges. In fact, I entered up to 98 pounds and that was still within the normal ranges.

Since your DD is athletic, it is important to keep in mind that muscle weighs more than fat. Muscles aren't always easy to see depending on body type, so she while your DD may not look muscular, she really is.

I would seek a second opinion.

 

[Mom21]

I'm puzzled here. I just entered your DD's weight and height on the BMI calculator on WebMD. It says she is within normal BMI and weight ranges. In fact, I entered up to 98 pounds and that was still within the normal ranges.

Since your DD is athletic, it is important to keep in mind that muscle weighs more than fat. Muscles aren't always easy to see depending on body type, so she while your DD may not look muscular, she really is.

I would seek a second opinion.

I agree that you just can't go on weight, and if it were just that I would pooh-pooh it and watch her. However, she does have very large belly rolls. This isn't just a matter if being over on the scale. She also has a lot of cellulite on her legs and stomach and even arms. I really think she is overweight, even though she has lots of muscle. Even if she loses weight, she is going to have a large rear and legs and that is ok. It is the fat problem that bothers me. I really worry about diabetes. She has several doctors she sees in the practice and they have all said she needs to lose. We went to a nutritionist that also agrees that she needs to lose. the nutritionist wanted her to lose less than the drs however and then hold steady until her height caught up. I agree with that.

 

[sk!mom]

How much actual time does your DD spend exercising? If cheer is only once or twice a week she might need to move more. Any chance that she could add some really active dance classes or maybe just an evening family walk or bike ride.

My DD9 takes 3 dance classes a week each for 1.5 hours. She works up a good sweat. She also has 30 minutes of PE daily at school and is on a basketball team- one hour long practice a week plus a game. Her team only has 7 players so she gets a good work out their also. The school PE is sometimes a good work out but if they play some type of game there is often time spent standing around. Then there is of course play time movement- scooter, roller blades, etc...

I would recommend never buying the school lunch. The school lunches have way too much fat, carbs, and the portions are too large. My DD, also prefers to pack her lunch so we haven't bought since she tried it a couple of times in Kindergarten. I can pack her a much more nutritious lunch that is low fat.

I would also cut out the carbs at dinner and one snack. Let her have the ice cream bar or the other snack.

I share your concern with teaching healthy eating without over emphasizing weight. My DD has a definite sweet tooth and love of chocolate. She takes a snack size candy bar almost everyday for her lunchtime dessert. So far that satisfies her craving for something sweet. Hopefully she is also learning portion control.

I truly understand what you are struggling with. My older child had these struggles and still has to watch his weight at 21. His problem though was that he really likes to eat and doesn't really care for sports (like his mom). Due to my experience with him, I have really tried to help my DD eat healthy and have made sure to find activities that she loves to do so that she looks forward to moving.

Good luck to you- Mothering can be so hard.

 

[grlpwrd]

I appreciate everyones input. We are going to keep working on this. I am a bit puzzled about those that suggested she is getting too much sugar. Her breakfast cereal is 4 grams. According to the nutritionist anything under 7 is great for breakfast. Mybe I wasn't clear on the fact that her ice cream is the sugar free/guilt free kind. If she is having a poor eating day then she is only allowed a sugar free popsicle for 10 calories. The only sugar she is getting is the 100 calorie snacks once a day (not everyday--maybe 5 days a week). Her nutritionist thought this would be better than a piece of fruit. Actually less sugar (although not the natural type) and would make her feel more satisfied. So where else can I cut out the sugar? Also maybe once a week she has a snack at church or her teacher gives out a piece of candy as a reward. Not much I can do about this nor would I want to. Her eye dr gave her a sucker the other day and I told her to save it until after dinner. She forgot about it and hasn't asked for it in 5 days so it went in the trash. thanks again everyone. This is going to be a long road, I can tell.

Well, just because a food label states that it's "sugar free" or "no added sugar" doesn't mean it's necessarily true. "Sugar free" according to the FDA applies only to added sucrose, but the manufacturer can still add other sweeteners, such as honey, corn syrup, fructose, and dextrose. That is why you need to really read the label for the true amount of calories and sugar grams.

There are hidden sugars not only per ingredients, but also serving size. If she's eating cereal for breakfast with 4 grams of sugar have you also counted the amount of sugar in her milk according to serving size? 1/2 cup cereal is standard plus the sugar grams in milk - it all adds up.

When I mentioned that your dd may be eating too much sugar I was referring to the glycemic index. Sugar can make you fat by affecting your glucose levels thereby affecting your blood sugar. She may be eating too many carbohydrates and that is exactly what sugar is - 100% carbs - which ultimately converts to fat. Eating too much sugar and too many carbs is simply not good.

Kids need carbs, but they also need more complex carbs and other nutrients. She really should be eating about 40% of her calories from carbohydrates. These should be mostly complex carbohydrates, lots of fiber, and little refined or processed sugar (ie white bread, crackers, etc.).

Have you been keeping an eating log for her? That is a good way to measure and gauge what she's eating, when, etc. Not to the point of being compulsive about it edging towards an eating disorder, but she should know how to eat right, especially because she is an athlete.

How many times does she eat at school per week? It's no secret that school lunches are not the healthiest around. When you mention that she ate chicken nuggets and tacos at school those are really not the best choices for her.

Yes, she should also be doing more exercise, especially with the family.

Again, GL!

 

[Puffy2]

I plugged your child's figures into a growth chart and came up with this result:

At 9 years:

your child is 88 pounds, and that is
at the 93rd percentile for weight.

your child is 52 inches, and that is
at the 43rd percentile for height.

It looks like she is on the high end for weight BUT is also slighly on the low end for height. I could be that her height just needs to catch up with her.

I'd have the physican check her thyroid and any other conditions that might be influencing her weight that are beyond her control.

I'd cook healthy and pack her lunches, encourage activity and "healthy eating" with a snack or treat once or twice a day. She shouldn't get the idea that food is the enemy or focus on food too much. If you are doing the above I wouldn't worry about it anymore.

 

[luv2nascar]

Personally I think you are making way to much of a big deal of eating and food. You restrict her so much she will end up being really fat to rebel or with an eating disorder. I am not flaming you just observing. At 9 unless she has health problems I don't see the big deal. Keep her exercising and have a goal not to gain weight and as she grows she will slim down. It doesnt seem like you are giving her a healthy image of her body.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I will admit her portions are large, but we have reduced them significantly in the last year.

Well there is your "lightbulb" right there. You do a wonderful job of "control" all day and then she lets loose with dinner because she is starving. Not really starving, but you know what I mean.

If you want her to lose you have to control her portions.

Also you are deceiving yourself with labeling. It is all baloney unless you read it carefully and know Biochemistry.

If you want to lose weight everyone knows you can't eat ANY SNACKS, except fresh veggies, etc...

So really I do not see where you are trying to have her "lose weight". You are more in a holding pattern.
In order to lose, you have to decrease your calorie intake.

That would be hard with a small child. {HUGS}

 

[LMC]

As already suggested have the thyroid checked. The pediatrician can do this. If that does not yield any results and you want to pursue it further, get a referral to an endocrinologist. My son more than doubled(!!) his weight in two years. No he does have a genetic condition and no muscle mass and probably a very much slower metabolism, but I wanted a complete work up to make sure nothing was "wrong" with him. The test came back normal except they want to run another cortisol. You never know what it may be so I would try to get the blood work and the endocrin would be the expert.

 

[AnnR]

I agree with all who have suggested having her thyroid checked. I would also have her cortisone checked in a 24 hour UFC. That is a test where she has to collect all her urine for 24 hours. Is she tired a lot? Does she have any purple stretch marks? Also has her growth slowed any in the last couple of years? If so check out Cushings disease. http://www.cushings-help.com/intro.htm

It sounds like she is eating pretty healthy. All kids need some treats. To deprive her of everything will make her sneak food and be unhappy. If she is happy with herself then just let it go. Continue what you are doing and keep her active.

 

[swilphil]

I'm another one who thinks it would be a good idea to lighten up a little about controlling her food. I know you are trying to do what's best, but she's heading toward an eating disorder and/or a life-long struggle with food if you don't stop. Just give her all the control about what she eats. You do get to control what food is in the house, so make sure you have lots of whole grains, fruits and vegetables and lean meats. I wouldn't get too hung up on her portion size and the sugar-free, fat-free stuff. You can have a few goodies, but make them for special occassions. Also try to encourage some fun exercise, even if it's just walking or doing Dance Dance Revolution with a Playstation, etc. If she hasn't thinned out after puberty, then you can try some sort of diet. At that age, she will WANT to be thin. I don't mean to be critical of you because it's obvious you are a concerned and loving parent, but as a high school teacher I saw so many young girls from WONDERFUL families who suffered from eating disorders.