Don't blame me....I'm just sitting here behaving myself, nebo. This is getting good, though, I must admit.
Ah yes Melinda, I'm just here for your amusement.
And then you sicced, ,,,,,
Utahmama on me. Utah? wow, you certainly have a lot of friends. I know this TR explosion is mostly due to you, and Melinda, and Jamie. I appreciate all you guys have done, it certainly gives you more incentive to write when you know it's actually being "read".
By the way, Tiggerbell, I know Tiggerwannabe is in your group Wpsandi, ( ok, ok, I'm close), and I remember her posting on the first report. But I haven't seen her since, except for a silly nebo quote on her signature. Is she mad at me? Or is she another Jaime alias?
And everyone else, thanks, and no, I'm not going to touch the "shorty" lines.
Crap, think I might have,,, no no, never mind. On to business.
Trust me, this next section is rated R. No one under age 11 is allowed to read.
Just because you wake up with a cold, well, that doesn't mean that the whole front hasn't totally moved in yet. I found that out.
All audio went away again. About eleven, we went back up to change. It took Diane a little while to realize that there wasn't much use in trying to talk to me. Now, normally for me, this might be a good thing.
Wait, did I just say that outloud?
Just kidding honey.
We changed, got ready to go catch the bus. Then I realized I didn't want to walk around the Magic Kingdom in silence, so I took a damn Benedryl. Then, I realized, our plan is to eat a counter service not long after arrival. The thing is, the hydrocodone pills don't help much on a full stomach. So I took 2 more of those. Oh no, we're not done yet! I put a Benadryl in my pocket, and two more vikes in my pocket, ,,,,,you know, for emergency.
But wait! There's more!
I also slipped a couple of airplane type bottles of Captain's Morgan in my pocket,,,,, just in case we need a drink later, and you know you can't get one there.
Spiffy, just spiffy! If security frisks me, I'll probably be in jail with " Intent to Distribute".
To me, I"m just in survival mode. Allrighty then, down at the bus stop, for once it's pretty empty,,,, and I"m looking around. I guess I had a pretty sad look on my face.
"Steve?" "Something wrong?"
"Granny's not here". I said with a sniff. " Poor little granny."
" Oh brother!"
"Jimmy's not here either, and that's a good thing."
" Poor little granny."
"Oh brother."
By the time we got to the park, everything that I just swallowed was kicking in.
" IT"S A MIRACLE!" I can hear!
And I'm not looking for a pillow yet!
I let her be in charge once we got there.
I just followed right behind, La la la la la, oh look, there's Devine.
"No Steve, that's a tree. Devine is at the Animal Kingdom."
ahhh
So, what's the first bloody thing she heads for? Of course, you got it. Buzz.
She asks. " only ten minutes, you wanna do this?"
"Posilutely, this time I'll kick your butt all the way back to Carpentersville."
We actually got on in less than ten. And this time, I went in first. It ocurred to me, I have always sat on the right side.
And lost. This time, I'm on the left, the winning side.
I have the hand, baby.
The ride starts, she's firing away, and I'm just kinda looking around.
Wow! Look at all the cool Z's. How pretty.
"What are you waiting for?"
" Oh, uh, Godot?"
I giggled.
"OH BROTHER!"
Then I started firing, at everything. The people in the car in front of us, even Diane but it wouldn't swivel far enough for her.
At about 3 quarters way through, I glanced at the score.
Holy Cow! We are almost tied!
I then put my all into it.
If you're expecting a happy ending, ,,
NOT!
She beat me by about 5 thousand points.
We walked out of there, I said, "OK, that's it, follow me." " I have the hand now."
She just follows me, and I'm mumbling to myself.
"What?"
"Sorry, 'Just keep walking, just keep walking,' " Well, that started a "Finding Nemo," quote frenzy for the next few hours.
We cut through the hub, Liberty Square, and into Frontierland.
And I pulled her right up to the Shooting Gallery. And I have the quarters, baby.
"Show me."
I stuck in two quarters.
"Proceed." And handed her the rifle.
I think she hit 4 targets. Out of 20.
" I don't think everything is working."
ahh, I knew she'd say that.
Two more quarters go in.
My turn.
I didn't miss a shot.
Then I took the rifle, broke it over my knee, smashed the pieces on the counter and threw them at the audience while singing Baba O'Riley.
Ok, the last part didn't happen, but I felt like doing it.
Even she doesn't understand how she beats me at Buzz all the time.
I followed her back through Liberty Square, and she paused in front of Columbia Harbour House. "What do you think?"
"That's where I'd eat."
(nemo ref. #2)
"Good one." Then she walks over to the open door,
"We go in, we come back out. We go in, we come back out."
Now it's my turn. " Oh brudder."
Both of us ordered the fish and chips. With fries. You have a choice between fries or carrots doncha know. Hmmm, fries or carrots, hold on, let me think about this. Ya, right. Who in there right mind would order carrots?
I mean, besides Jaime, who gets free, FREE fries anyway!
Our tray arrives and we hit the condiment stand, then grab a booth by a window.
As we are preparing our food, I see her look down, then glance at my basket, and grab my pepper packet.
"MINE, mine, ,,, mine."
That didn't stop her, so I slid out to get another one.
Just as I was getting up, I heard this strange "bark" like sound from the corner booth right behind me.
As I stood, I turned back inward to my left to see.
First I saw a little boy's back of the head. Then across from him, his mother. Only mom had a horrified look on her face.
Completing the circle, I saw who I would guess to be dear old dad, standing by the edge of the booth, not five feet from me.
And vomit is pouring out of his mouth, down his chin, down his shirt, ala excorcist style. Or ala La la trip report style.
And he was just standing there. Not knowing what to do! I guess it hit him totally by surprise, and he "barked" again. And as disgusted as I was, for some reason I couldn't look away. It was kind of like the Epcot fountains going off. I kept waiting for the music to start to accompany it.
But he just stood there!
Sharing.
Sharing can be highly overrated some times.
Now, I know that there might be some of you, well, ok, a lot of you, that are quite angry with me for springing this on you with no warning.
TOO BAD!
I had my plate in front of me, and while you're just reading this, I was only a few feet away experiencing all the virtual reality special effects.
I glanced really quickly at Diane, no, she didn't miss a thing either, and within seconds, we were bolting to the other side of the restaurant with out trays.
Swell. It's late and I haven't eaten yet. Now, even I'm not hungry just thinking back on it. This could be a Cheetoh's dinner tonight. see y'all t'morrow, take care
