Going to sleep before making up?

[florida-again]

I hate to go to sleep on an argument. Meanwhile BF couldn't care less, he'd rather go to sleep, forget it and just act normal in the morning.

Both ways are better than carrying on the argument the next morning of course, but I can never understand how he can't be superstitious about going to sleep feeling angry with each other (especially when we're long-distance)

How do you and your SO do things? and do you agree on the way it's done?

 

[pjtjm]

I don't like to go to bed, leave the house, etc... without at least mentioning that we still love each other even if I'm furious!

It reminds me of this joke....

Don't go to bed angry, stay up and fight!!!

 

[florida-again]

Don't go to bed angry, stay up and fight!!!

I actually agree with this! I'm always telling BF: I'd rather spend all night arguing with him than not talking to him at all.

 

[LaLa]

You know, when DH and I first got married, we said we would never go to bed angry at one another. Well, 10 years and 2 kids later, that's out the window. It's very rare that it happens, but at times I have gone to bed so angry with him and I never thought I would. I'm not saying that is the way it should be done, probably the opposite is true, but it just happens that way. Sometimes I would rather just not talk to him than argue all night. When we are in that mode, nothing gets accomplished because we are both only trying to get our point across to the other one. Usually we wake up the next morning and have both cooled down some, see things in a different light, and can actually talk it through without fighting. Never underestimate the Cool Down Time.

 

[sissybells]

My Grandma and Mom have always said that if you go to bed angry then you wake up with aches and pains. That always stuck with me and I am very superstitious about it. Always make up.

 

[bride03]

I like that one steppdaddy!!!! I will keep that one in mind. Thanks for sharing.

 

[KarenAylwood]

No matter how long it takes to make up... I will always bug BF until we do (even if I was the one that said "just go away, I don't want to deal with this anymore!).

We hardly fight... but when we do, Oh boy do I have a temper!

There is no way we will go to bed angry... I hate it. We'll stay up all night before that happens!!!

 

[LightBurnsBlue]

I try not to go to bed angry...but I do it on occasion. If the BF has done something mean, hurtful, or really stupid, going to bed angry is the best way to keep that behavior from happening again!

 

[minkydog]

You know, when DH and I first got married, we said we would never go to bed angry at one another. Well, 10 years and 2 kids later, that's out the window. It's very rare that it happens, but at times I have gone to bed so angry with him and I never thought I would. I'm not saying that is the way it should be done, probably the opposite is true, but it just happens that way. Sometimes I would rather just not talk to him than argue all night. When we are in that mode, nothing gets accomplished because we are both only trying to get our point across to the other one. Usually we wake up the next morning and have both cooled down some, see things in a different light, and can actually talk it through without fighting. Never underestimate the Cool Down Time.

I'm with you on this won. After 24yrs of marriage sometimes I don't have the energy to fight all night(not that i'd want to!) We find that more gets accomplished if we just drop it and go to our corners for awhile. We've never stayed really mad for more than a day.

 

[MsDisney23]

Oh Heck, just POP him one time up side the head and go to sleep!

 

[kilee]

DH has no problem w/ the going to sleep angry and waking up like nothing is wrong method. Only happens maybe once or twice a year--- BUT I can't sleep when we've had an arguement. Then in the morning I'm even madder- because now I'm sleep deprived too.

 

[bride03]

DH has no problem w/ the going to sleep angry and waking up like nothing is wrong method. Only happens maybe once or twice a year--- BUT I can't sleep when we've had an arguement. Then in the morning I'm even madder- because now I'm sleep deprived too.

I'm the same way and I'll lay there and get more and more upset until I say something like "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU CAN JUST ACT LIKE NOTHING IS WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

 

[Cindy's Mom]

If DH and I followed that rule - we'd never sleep

 

[Jackie0824]

I go to bed mad all the time. But, I just get peeved really easily. Sometimes I rather go to bed mad, then to stay up and argue. Because, sometimes It just makes me more mad. My husband doesnt care either way. But, we are bad examples as are marriage isnt very good anyways.
I do remember seeing a Brady Bunch Episode about it. I think it was Brady bunch, how they said they cant go to bed mad . Ok maybe it was a diffferent show LOL

 

[mickeyboat]

DH has the fight and be done mentality. I have the stew about it and fight all night attitude. Our fighting turns out some where in the middle. Sometimes it isn't productive to continue hashing out something over and over. It's o.k. to agree to disagree, and when he goes to sleep and leaves me stewing, I usually agree that it's something to fight about and be done with.

Good luck.

Denae

 

[jennyl772003]

Well, I will go to bed angry.

My DH tells me I am a good fighter, and when I get really worked up, I can say some really hurtful things. My DH is pretty sensative to that, so sometimes it is better for me to just go to sleep to give me time to cool off. The next morning, I am usually much more calm and things resolve themselves much better.

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

I try not to go to bed angry, but my SO will go straight to bed and not say a word (even if it is 6:00pm), he then wakes up mad but can't remember why we were fighting. When it is actually bed time, I hate climbing into bed next to him (while he is off sleeping and I have been stewing over the argument the rest of the night) knowing nothing has been resolved nor will it be because he "can't remember."

 

[Buttercup26]

I think sometimes you need to go to bed - it give both a chance to calm down and you can tackle it more rationally in the morning. I know a few times I have been REALLY upset, but by morning I realize it's not as big a deal as I was making it out to be and can discuss it more calmly.

 

[Tinkerbell_Girl]

I am the kind that can't go to bed angry. I like to fight and get it over with.

 

[tiff211]

DH is the lover, I am the fighter. I can yell, scream until the cows come home and he's just like I love you baby as he climbs into bed and pulls the covers up to his ears and drifts off to dreamland while I am still fuming!!! Or, if we are both in the bed, he will try to cuddle while I am still mad and I schooch over and then he scoochs over and then I schooch until I am at the very edge of the bed, using every muscle not to fall off!! The energy I have to use to hang on, diverts my attention away from being angry!!