Going Solo - too many memories?

[diswedwish]

Ok, here's another solo question although it will take a bit to get to it...

I got married in Disney in 2/03. Leaving out the gory details, left said husband just about 2 weeks ago (very sudden, I found something out and he did some things which I never expected and to me they are unforgivable). I loved Disney long before he came along and I spend waaaaaaaay too much time on here and other Disney sites In short, Disney is an important part of my life.

I had originally planned a trip for January, which I had to cancel because of husband's car troubles - no $$$$ for a trip. I was planning a May trip just in case we'd be able to swing it - no reservations or anything, just in the dreaming stages. I had planned to get APs, drive, stay 12 nights, do SW, etc.

So now the May trip has become what I term a "Celebration Trip" - lol! I'm planning on taking my parents as a late Christmas (also, thank you for being supportive and being there) present; my dad is reluctant, my mom is definitely going. I ordered my very first AP today (will get their tickets later) as a Christmas/divorce present to myself.

$ is no longer an issue - most of the bills I had were really his (student loans, car repairs, etc., etc. the list goes on). I am living with my parents and will be saving for a house, so I can't go hog-wild unless I win the lottery, but I do anticipate at least 1 solo trip over the next year.

When I brought up the May trip, my mom asked me why I wanted to go back to WDW when I'd been with John so many times. I laughed and told her that just because I'd been to McDonald's with John didn't mean I'd never eat at a McDonald's again. I'm looking forward to sharing Disney with my parents (or just my mom) and experiencing WDW solo - those are 2 completely new experiences for me (unless you count going with my parents when I was 5 )

So my question is this - have you ever gone solo after something like this has happened - where most of your recent Disney memories have been made with someone who is no longer a part of your life? I anticipate having a good time and enjoying everything is a different way than before; I just wondered if anyone else had a similar experience? I know that everyone reacts differently to different situations, I just wondered if anyone could relate?

Any thoughts are welcome

 

[chell]

There are so many distractions at WDW that it shoulnd't be a problem. I realized that I love the parks so much more now. My ex did all he could to ruin my time there so I'm loving getting to really enjoy.

 

[Cheshire Figment]

So my question is this - have you ever gone solo after something like this has happened - where most of your recent Disney memories have been made with someone who is no longer a part of your life? I anticipate having a good time and enjoying everything is a different way than before; I just wondered if anyone else had a similar experience? I know that everyone reacts differently to different situations, I just wondered if anyone could relate?

I really have this problem, but check this thread as to why.

 

[NCRedding]

Like Cheshire Val, My SIL went in May this after the death of my brother in July of 2004. Their last trip as a family (with my nephwe) was to WDW. She did some grieving and some rememberances of good times.

The two of us are going in January for the 1/2 marathon, and she plans on making some new happy memories. We're also planning a cruise (not a DCL one) as an extended family.

Have a great time. Good luck.

 

[#1DizGal]

I understand completely. My husband and I had a belated wedding trip to WDW back in 1989. He died at age 40 in 1990. I know he'd want me to return to my 'happy place' because it's the only thing that makes me truly happy since his death. When I view Illuminations and listen to the music, it brings back memories of he and I, because that's the one thing I remember most clearly when there. Yeah, I do get a bit weepy, but is something I can't miss on each and every trip. Do what makes you happy. Life is too short. Have a wonderful trip.

 

[FluffyPooh]

The World (WDW) is big enough to make new and better memories. Always a different experience, go, you will enjoy making new memories even as a solo. You, go, girl!

 

[mushumadness]

I went with my ex to wdw (we broke up 1 week before we were due to take our second wdw trip together, lckily it was with my family too) so when we split the week before I though I would never enjoy the next trip.

Turns out I had a fantastic time (with many thanks to my parents and my brother and his family) and made alot of brillint new memorys.

I am now long over the ex, and I go to wdw with my dbf (of 4 years) in 6 days and we make brilliant new memorys every time

you will be ok and congratulations for being strong enough to say enough is enough

 

[diswedwish]

Thank you all for your replies I can't imagine what visiting Disney must be like after the death of a loved one. Figurative "death" of a relationship, yes, but I can't imagine more than that... My heart goes out to those of you who have lost someone special that you shared Disney with.

On the upside my mom is getting excited by the planning for the May trip, and I think she will actually appreciate all my "useless" knowledge about Disney. After that trip, I plan my first solo trip As I read on the solo boards - someday my Prince will come, until then I have my AP

 

[Disney Dee]

I use to drag my husband kicking and screaming to DW for the kids. Then I went with a girlfriend and had the best trip ever! After the divorce and the kids were grown, I didn't plan any more trips for a few yrs. Then when I met my fiance he wanted to see what it was like, so I went with him,luckily, he loves it to. So go on a solo trip or with your parents, or both. DW is magical, you don't need to go with anyone special, though I think a trip with my parents would have been great, we could have made so many wonderful memories you will remember long after they are gone, now they are gone, and I regret never going with them, you have the opportunity I didn't get, so go girl, and have a great time!!! Someday Mr Right will be there with you and you can share your memories of your trip with your parents with him

 

[PrincessAurora]

You should go and have a great time. I also have a Disney ex (maybe they are the same lyin SOB.. hahaha) and I am planning this trip specifically to "get my memories back". I am going with my close friends, we are staying in the same resorts, we are eating at some of the same places so I can "re-write" those memories in my head. Now when I think of a Disney experience, the last memory I have won't be a painful one but a happy one with people that love me.

 

[Stacy's a freak]

I think your situation deserves a "CONGRATULATIONS!" I was in your situation about 2 years ago. Actually, my EX-H and I went to Disney in Oct., 2003 and we were separated less than 2 months later. Honestly, the last straw in our crumbling relationship is that we couldn't even have fun at WDW! So I just got back from my first solo trip and it was the best thing that I've ever done. It was just for ME and it was wonderful and FUN! I'm only sad that I waited 2 whole years to go back!

I say GOOD FOR YOU for making the best of a difficult situation and for moving on with your life. I wish you all the best

 

[goofy4tink]

My mom, dd (who turned 6 on this trip) and I went to WDW for my (and dd's) first time ever in '99. We had such a great time. Then, two trips later, my dh suggested we buy into DVC. We did and I had these terrific plans to spend a week, just the ladies, in our new DVC villa the next summer. I had it all set as to how I was going to surprise my mom at Christmas. We didn't even tell her we had bought DVC. But, life throws out those curveballs. My mom died a month after we got home from that particular trip. In fact, the day we buried her, is the day we got our finalized paperwork from DVC. Dd and I were devastated. My dh sent the two of us off to WDW two months later. It was such a bittersweet trip. Dd and I 'saw' my mom everyplace we looked. It wasn't the best trip we had, but it was a much needed one. We still go and get a bit misty eyed but that's okay. So......go to WDW. Hava a ball with your parents. Sure, you'll get down every once in awhile. But that's okay. It's very cathartic being in WDW.
Here's hoping everything works out for you. Be sure to do some things in May that you didn't do with the 'ex'!!!! Make some terrific new memories.

 

[diswedwish]

goofy4tink - one of the things I keep telling myself is to really appreciate the times I have now - especially the trip with my mom.

I'm living with my parents right now, which isn't bad since we're close, but I keep reminding myself that even though I feel down at times to appreciate all of the love they've shown me. They've been incredibly supportive... Now if only I could talk my dad into Disney... That's not happening anytime soon - lol!

But plans are starting to firm up. Wonder of wonders my mom is reading my Passporter and taking notes Who would have thought? I received my AP and am waiting to see if any BRP rates come out for May. Keeping a watch on airline prices as well. It looks like it'll be a 10-14 night trip. The only things I really have to work on is learning where all the smoking spots are (my mom smokes), and trying to teach my mom that Disney prices are different than real world prices