Funny things that the elderly say ...

[Tink9721]

My grandma is 85 and VERY stubborn and opinionated. If she doesn't like your clothes or your hair or something she'll tell you in a "polite" way. She usually only does this to family members, but it's hilarious. She always used to say "Is your hair supposed to look like that?" to my aunt Recently she looked at my shoes and said "Are they supposed to be that color?" This past summer she walked past my mom and very bluntly said "I don't like your pants." I was cracking up When she was over here for dinner a few months ago she saw a pair of my shoes on the floor. I have big feet(size 10 since I was 8 years old!) but apparently she just noticed that recently. She said "Look at the size of those shoes! They look like gun boats!"

 

[topolino]

My mother calls any movie, or especially a made for tv movie, a "story".

"I saw a good story on tv last night"!!

 

[Fantasmic23]

My mother calls any movie, or especially a made for tv movie, a "story".

"I saw a good story on tv last night"!!

Yes! My grandmother calls TV movies "stories", too, or "I saw a good picture on TV last night."

She also calls going out to a movie theater "Going to the show."

 

[starrzone]

I've been best friends with J for almost 20 years (I'm 29) and we used to spend a lot of Saturdays with his grandparents. I treasure these times now, because they are both in the throes of Alzheimers and their personalities and memories are pretty muddled...

Anyhow, one day when we were all out driving, Grandma asked that we stop at a pharmacy so she could pick something up. She didn't have any cash, so she asked Grandpa for some. After she went in the store, he came up with this gem: "I'll be whistling in Dixie before I see THAT money again". I know he didn't expect to get it back or anything; it was just REALLY funny, because he was a man of very few words and didn't tell many jokes

 

[Tink9721]

Another funny thing is they always think people want to steal things from them. I'm not talking about valuable things. If my Mom can't find something like an old pair of socks or pajamas , she'll accuse the last non-family member that was in the house.

My grandma does this, except she usually thinks it's a family member We were on vacation in Vermont last summer and my cousin went home before we did. The day he left my grandma couldn't find her stockings(tights) and was convinced that my cousin took them. I was like "Grandma, why on earth would Josh want your stockings?!"

--"Dinner" is lunch and "supper" is the evening meal

My grandma does this too. On Sundays her family always used to have a late afternoon meal that was "dinner" and a light evening meal that was "supper." But on a normal day, she has afternoon lunch and evening supper.

My dad would call a purse a pocketbook

My mom and my grandma ALWAYS called a purse a pocketbook. I never thought it was weird since I've always heard it

If my hair was a mess I would get-" it looks like an explosion in a mattress factory" or "the wreck of the Hesperus". Sadly, I had to google that one.

I got "your hair looks like a rat's nest!"

 

[Tink9721]

I just thought of some from my Papa(grandpa). He would always drop his R's on some words. Like corn. It would become "con." And if a word started with "thr" he'd drop the H. Throat became troat, Three became tree, etc. So a sentence would be like "I have tree pieces of con stuck in my troat."

A funny Papa story...he would always buy things just because they were on sale. One day he bought 12 grapefruits. His son(my uncle) came over to visit and this was the conversation.

Papa: Here, Wayne, take some grapefruit.
Uncle Wayne: I don't eat grapefruit!
Papa: Well what am I gonna do with a dozen grapefruits?!
Uncle Wayne: Why did you buy them?!
Papa: They were on sale!

 

[cglaura]

My grandma would always say:

For things like "Oh my gosh!" -- "Oh, heavens to mergatroid!"

And for something like "Oh, for goodness sakes." -- "Oh for the love of green grass!"

My dad called the refrigerator an ice box too. Growing up that is what they had...the old style w/ a box on the bottom for a block of ice.

 

[Tink9721]

For things like "Oh my gosh!" -- "Oh, heavens to mergatroid!"

My mom says that sometimes

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

Is it just me or was this thread locked? I couldn't imagine why it would be. Maybe I'm losing it, whatever "it" is.

 

[kaytieeldr]

"It" is, quite obviously, an old people thing.

 

[Angelrose]

My mom had some weird sayings. She was teaching me to read. (which I'm sure she received a gold crown in heaven) But anyway, as I kept making the same mistakes over and over again, (I wasn't the sharpest tool) she would tell me I was like "Old Zip Coon". I have no idea what that was supposed to mean.

If I was being lazy, I was like a "bump on a log".

If she didn't like the way someone was dressed she would say "they looked like Benny". I never did find out who Benny was.

 

[cassie]

My hubby's grandpa, 92 always said "You believe that?"

If you said yes, you believed it - he would say you do not!!

LOL, my ex hubby always says that, and he's 69

 

[FoundMyPrince]

My grandmother used to say "p'shaw". It was kind of like "give me a break" or "shoot".

My other grandparents would say "davenport" or "devan" rather than "sofa".

 

[EveDallas]

My grandma used to say "for the love of Pete" when she was annoyed at something. She also used "davenport" for couch and "chifferobe" for dresser.

 

[dawnandnala]

My grandma used to say "for the love of Pete" when she was annoyed at something. She also used "davenport" for couch and "chifferobe" for dresser.

I heard either davenport or daveno growing up -
From Wikipedia:

Davenport is the name of a series of sofas manufactured by the now-defunct A. H. Davenport Company. Due to the popularity of the furniture at the time, the name "Davenport" has become a genericized trademark. It is often used as a synonym for "sofa", especially in the Midwestern United States and in northern New York state. Specifically, it is used in the Adirondack Region and the Tug Hill Plateau, especially amongst those born there before World War II. The so-called Davenports of the northern New York region are often locally made sofa versions of the locally manufactured convertible Adirondack chair.

Among the younger generations, the word has come to mean a more formal sofa. In the Tug Hill and Adirondack regions in New York, a Davenport may refer especially to a couch which, like a modern futon lounge, converts on pivoting hinges from a sofa to a bed.

In other areas of North America, the word Davenport is used for a Futon-style sofa with storage under the seat area.

A similar word, Daveno, also refers to a sofa or couch. The term was more widely used in the 50s and 60s, particularly in the Pacific Northwest

 

[Angelrose]

Oh I thought of another word that my mom used. Folderoll. As in all that folderoll. I know i"m spelling it wrong. but that's how it sounds.

My dad would say "he doesn't have a bupka". Meaning he didn't have a bean. I think it is Yiddish. He grew up in a Jewish neighborhood in New York. He was an Irish Catholic, but they got along great. He had a few other Yiddish words, but I don't have a clue how to spell them. One was go to sleep and he said it as "gay shlofin". That's all I can think of for now.