Funny Pet Stories

[IMGONNABE40!]

(This is inspired by the handwashing thread)

My husband does not share my love for my cats and will rarely pick them up or handle them in any way. When he does, he is very meticulous about washing his hands and anything that may be "cat contaminated" as he likes to say.

One day I was standing in my dressing room (which also served as the cat station with a spot for their litter and a feeding area) when my husband walked in carrying one of the cats. He placed her on the cat bed and after he did so, walked past me to the sink and started doing the surgeon bit on his hands. I was chiding him for this behavior, how it was unnecessary blah blah blah when at the same time we both looked over at the cat bed to see my little cat furiously licking her front paws!

 

[katerkat]

They're cats - everything they do is funny! Tycho is the same as yours - if you hold him, he has to clean himself off wherever your dirty hands were. He also licks your hands or arms to clean them before biting the clean spot. Doesn't like our taste, I guess.

 

[jwsqrdplus2]

This one puts DH in the cruel and unusual Hall of Fame, but it is funny:

When we lived in FL, our house had huge screened-in patio with sliding doors from both the living room and the Master bedroom. Shortly after we moved in, we got a dog (already had 2 cats), and shortly after that, the dog was at the vets getting fixed. It was a beautiful day, so we had the doors to the living room open. The cats, who were (and the one that is still around still is) relatively cautious. So they were doing what DH calls SLO-MO kitty (cat owners know what I am talking about!) as they checked out the patio. DH "decides" to remind them that a dog lives there, so he takes a runing start then jumps into the patio, landing about 3 feet away from the cats, then yells like you do when you want to scare someone as a joke! Well both cats took off like a shot for the Master bedroom doors. Unfortunately, those ones were not open. One after another both cats ran into the sliding glass doors, hitting the exact same spot, then recovered and ran in the other doors. DH still cannot tell that story without dissolving into gales of laughter.

 

[doxdogy]

We use to have a german shepherd named Scooter. He weighed about 100lbs and was such a wonderful dog. We do not have any carpeting in our living room or dining room. One day he had gone outside to go potty and it started pouring down rain. I opened the sliding glass door to let him in the house. He comes running into the house at full speed. Well, he hit the tile floor and started sliding. He literally sat down and put out one paw in front of him and slid acroos the dining room and the living room and right into the fireplace doors. After we made sure he wasn't hurt, DH and I just laughed so hard at the poor guy. Amazingly, he didn't knock over anything or take out any doxies while he was sliding across the floor.

 

[sk8belle]

My kitty likes to have company when she eats. One day, she was meowing at me incessantly to come stand in the kitchen with her while she ate. I took a few steps toward the kitchen with the intent of going in there with her. She took this as a cue to run in the same direction. Unfortunately, she didn't pay attention when she turned around. She ran face first into the front wheel of one of my bikes! I gasped in horror and lunged for her to make sure she was OK. She either thought that sound meant I was mad at her or she was humiliated because she ran to hide. I finally caught her after a few minutes. Fortunately, she was fine. That's when I finally started laughing at her.

sk8belle

 

[Val]

Our dear old Golden, Butchie, was an hysterically funny dog. We lost him three years ago to cancer and still sorely miss him even though we have two other labs.......that being said, Butch wasn't the brighest golden in the litter.........

......he never did figure out how to get through the swinging door in the kitchen. The other dog would run through and he would just get bonked on the nose.

.....he got into the garbage once (well, many times) and got a tomato soup can stuck on his tongue (the lid was not quite all the way off). The mess looked like there was blood all over the kitchen and we were horrified, until we figured out he had gone to get a drink from the toilet, filled the tomatoe-y can with water, and it was a combination of blood, tomato and water. The cat sat in the middle of the mess with a look that said- don't blame me! Butch had to have three stitches to his tongue.

.....Butch rolled in tar and had to be shaved. He was horrible embarrassed. The next day he went to the neighbor's house, picked up an unopened packet or rat poison and brought home. We took it as a cry for help and hid all the mirrors at his level. Cats still laughed at him, though.

....he scratched through some drywall trying to get in from the garage during a thunderstorm (we weren't home) and got stuck between the walls. We had to saw him out. He was crated whenever we went out after that.

.....When the construction workers were building the next door neighbor's house, they complained how the racoons raided their lunch everyday. I was on bed rest at the time with my third child, and would sneak downstairs to let Butch out and not really watch him. When he came home with a pudding snack in his mouth, we knew it probably wasn't raccoons!

...Butch was best friends with our Tom Cat, Butterscratch (kids couldn't say the word right and the name stuck). Old Butter, who is still around has set 1) himself on fire by sticking his paw into the candle, flicking it and sending a flaming ball of wax onto his backside during an ice storm ("great balls of fire" shall we say!); 2) broken his leg pulling a table down on himself; 3) getting stuck upside down hanging from his cast from the door knob on the sliding glass door; 4) underestimating his girth and becoming trapped under a dresser, which had to be dismanteled to extract him; 5) been skewered by a thorn from a locust tree as he was chased by a squirrel; and 6) accidently rolled in hot pink paint (don't ask- we can't figure out what he was doing either). We figure he has three lives left.


With 4 kids, 2 large dogs, 6 cats, 7 guinea pigs, a husband, a mother in law with early stage alzheimers and a horse all living with me I can honestly say life is never boring!

 

[chichihoney]

i had 2 cats fall of a railing in to the trash can. cat got stuck in the dresser drawer 2 times closet 5 times

 

[eeyore74]

Well, I once literally scared the uh.. poo.. out my old cocker, Boyse. I came up behind him, touched his sides and said "boo!" and he jumped. Then Mom and I sniffed the air. Ewwwww!!! We had to clean his bottom, poor thing. (Poor us, too!) I never did that again to him.

He also rolled his "r"s when he growled or barked. I think he knew Spanish.

Our old shephard, Rowdie, liked my mom's old station wagon. He loved to go back and forth between the front and back seats, dargging his undersides across the upright armrest. His back legs would be all spread out, a look of rapture upon his face. That poor armrest!

Duncan trying to go upstairs with toys in his mouth. He's got one long slinky dog toy and he tries to go up a step, but he's standing on the toy and can't get it figured out. He's learned to give them to me and I'll carry them up for him.

Just the other day, going downstairs, he lost his back footing and instead of stopping, he just dragged his butt the rest of the way down. Very funny to see.

 

[tiggersmom2]

OMG, I have got to tell y'all this story!!
I had the most gorgeous blue smoke persian that went EVERYWHERE with us. My parents gave her to me when I was 5, at the time I was 25. Yes, this was a 20 year old, spoiled rotten kitty baby. Blue only loved me. Blue had some some SERIOUS issues with my husband, in fact, she would pee on his clothes if he left them on the floor for any short amount of time. We went to Gatlinburg TN and stayed in a NO PETS cabin, well guess what?! You got it! We took Blue Blue found a little hole in the jacuzzi side, and she went in. Well, when it was time to check out, she wouldn't come out! At 11:00 I had to call the office and confess to the manager that we had a cat that wouldn't come out from under the jacuzzi. Oh my gosh, she was so mad. She sent a repair man up there and told us we would have to pay for the repairs if the jacuzzi had to be ripped out. I agreed. Well my husband had the bright idea to hook up a water hose and spray her out with water. This only succeeded in the kitchen being drenched with water. When the repair guy came he said "OMG, look at this leak, did it come from the jacuzzi? "We just nodded, then he said "don't worry about having to pay, because this would have been pulled out due to the leak!" We were astonished! There was no service panel, so if anything really had gone wrong the whole thing would have had to be pulled out. To make a long story short, he got Blue out, and we didn't have to pay anything. Just because we are so greatful to this rental company, we stay there EVERY time!

 

[luvmy2sams]

Our cocker spaniel, Riley, isn't the smartest dog of the litter, sometimes. He's trained to run into the bathroom when you say "want a treat?", but on more than one occasion he's turned to run...and run straight into the wall. I can't tell you how many times I've had to touch-up the walls because of Riley nose prints! This dog also has a meltdown when any furniture is rearranged. He literally won't enter the room for a week, until his system has had time to adjust to the change.

Our other cocker spaniel, Daisy, sometimes shares Riley's brain. When we lived in western NY, our apartment opened onto a pond that was home to lots of Canadian geese. One time Daisy barreled out the back door to chase these poor birds and didn't think to stop at the water's edge. She busted through the newly-frozen ice and had a nice bath. Poor girl was so embarrassed!

 

[Lezah]

We have a 2 1/2 year old Black Lab who can be quite dopey at times. When he was still a pup (not that he isn't still one now ), he used to run to the patio door if he wanted out, would hit about half way there and think Oops, I don't think I'm gonna be able to stop, and sit down on his bum and slide all the way to the patio door and slam right into the glass. He never got hurt though, but it was the funniest thing to see and it didn't happen just once, but often. Ya gotta love him!

 

[Laura]

I had a Persian who would sit in the window and try to call the birds. He would come out with this twittery meow, trying to sound like a bird! It was hilarious!

 

[luvflorida]

We have a 10 year old Black Lab. A couple of years ago I took him to a routine Vet appointment. He was too big to get up on the examining table, so the Vet bent down near the floor and asked Snoop-Dog to sit while he checked the dog's ears. Well, Snoop-Dog kind of looked around the room, noticed a chair in the corner, walked over to the chair, jumped up, sat down, and looked at the Vet as if to say, "how's this?" We both cracked up laughing.

We have a two-car garage attached to our house, and for years we always kept Snoop-Dog's dog house in one side of the garage. One evening we decided we would like to start using that side to park one of our cars in, so my husband dragged Snoop-Dog's doggie house out into the yard. We let the dog outside to run around and try out his new arrangement while we sat down to dinner. All during dinner we kept hearing strange noises outside but we didn't think too much about it. Toward the end of dinner the noises sounded like they were getting closer to the house, so our son went outside to see what was going on. He came back in laughing hysterically. When we went out to see what was so funny, we found Snoop-Dog contently relaxing in his dog house, which was back IN the garage. Snoop-Dog had somehow pushed or pulled his dog house right back into the exact spot in had always been!

 

[pw2pp]

Just yesterday, our kitty named Cali (pictured below) got a hold of a wrapped Hershey's Kiss. She apparently tried to bite it right through the wrapper because when I found her, she was frantically shaking her head and trying to pry the kiss off of her front teeth (her teeth were deeply embedded into the chocolate.

We call her "Carbo-kitty" because she tries to eat anything with carbs in it: bread, cheez-its, chips, etc....

 

[CheshireVal]

My favorite cat moment comes from my late siamese, Sydney. He was a pretty ornery cat with a very distinct personality. One day I had a friend over and we were sitting on the couch talking pretty loudly and laughing. It was in the middle of the day, which was Syd's usual naptime. Well, after sitting in the corner and watching us with his ears back for quite some time, Syd retreated into my bedroom and-- NO LIE-- closed the door behind him!!! My friend and I couldn't stop laughing about that for about an hour!


This weekend I was lying on my side on the couch, watching TV, when my current kitty Sebastian (also Siamese) snuck up in front of the couch. All I saw were two ears sticking over the top, then suddenly he reached up and bopped me on the nose and then ran out of the room!

 

[KrnB]

The cat I had while I was growing up would go tearing around the house every once in a while. However, if he happened to be in the kitchen or dining room, he'd usually have a tough time taking off because of the linolium floor. He'd kind of run in place for a few seconds before he'd suddenly take off and run up stairs.

Well one time, he kind of misjudged the stairs and ran face first into the third stair. The poor cat crumpled up like an accordian, then popped back out into shape. Embarrassed but unhurt, he looked around to see if anyone noticed his little accident. Then he flipped his tail up and trotted the rest of the way up the stairs like, "I meant to do that."

 

[katerkat]

Oh, that reminds me of a Wedge story! We were at my ILs, and Wedge is terrified of DH's dad. His dad got up suddenly and scraed Wedge, who tried to take off across the linoleum. Needless to say, he couldn't get very good traction so he was scrambling for a bit. Then he got going and couldn't make the turn and slammed into the fridge. Scrambled some more trying to make it around the corner, and finally made it under the bed. I had to talk to him for a good five minutes before he would come out again!

 

[eeyore74]

I caught Duncan licking the fridge tonight.

He had a good dinner and my fridge is clean, but there he was licking it like an ice cream cone. lol