Funeral Outfit for Cold Weather

[CalDisneyMomof2]

Ok - California girl here! 40 degrees is cold to me. But when my husband's grandmother passed away a couple of weeks ago the question of what I'd wear to her funeral was the last thing on my mind. My husband and I are traveling to Sioux Falls/Yankton, South Dakota for her memorial service next Thursday and Funeral Friday.

What is appropriate to wear or are typical funeral "dress codes" completely out the door when it's that cold? It's supposed to be below zero which I've never done before. Any suggestions or tips to keep warm AND dress appropriately for a funeral in sub zero conditions when I've never been in any weather below 15 degrees?

And to make this budget related, let's try to keep suggestions semi-thrifty as I can't afford to go out and spend hundreds of dollars on a new winter wardrobe that I may never wear again.

Thanks!

 

[HeatherC]

I would wear Black Dress Pants and a nice Sweater with a scarf. Or a nice long sleeve blouse with a cardigan and scarf to dress it up a bit.

If you will also be outside at the gravesite, I would just bundle up with a warm coat, hat, scarf, gloves, etc over your clothes.

Sorry for your loss.

 

[wilkeliza]

My condolences.

If you have clothes you would typically wear to a funeral then go ahead and just wear that. The only change would be perhaps adding a black cardigan and stockings/tights so you aren't cold. It is quite possible it will only be the indoor services if the ground is already frozen. If it is outdoors look at Burlington Coat factory or somewhere similar and just a long black coat (lined wool would be a good option). I would also buy some hand warmers so you can put them in your pockets to keep warm.

 

[Jen and Ashwin]

My condolences.

If you have clothes you would typically wear to a funeral then go ahead and just wear that. The only change would be perhaps adding a black cardigan and stockings/tights so you aren't cold. It is quite possible it will only be the indoor services if the ground is already frozen. If it is outdoors look at Burlington Coat factory or somewhere similar and just a long black coat (lined wool would be a good option). I would also buy some hand warmers so you can put them in your pockets to keep warm.

Maybe this sounds crazy, but is there a family member that might be able to lend you a coat (similar to what @wilkeliza mentioned)? That way you don't have to own a coat that you will probably never use again. Doesn't hurt to ask around probably.

 

[Dashzap]

Any dark colored business casual you have will do.

 

[Sadie22]

Memorial services/viewings/gathering of family and friends, and funerals are almost always held inside. Anything you own that you want to wear to the funeral to keep warm should be fine. You will probably take off your coat when you arrive at the church or funeral parlor so wear whatever you prefer. You might want to contact the funeral director regarding any graveside service or burial as that will likely only be a simple prayer or other short speech by minister or funeral director and may even be held inside with burial at another time.

 

[scrapquitler]

I would wear Black Dress Pants and a nice Sweater with a scarf. Or a nice long sleeve blouse with a cardigan and scarf to dress it up a bit.

If you will also be outside at the gravesite, I would just bundle up with a warm coat, hat, scarf, gloves, etc over your clothes.

Sorry for your loss.

This. And here in CT, when there's a graveside service component and it's cold, the funeral director always provides blankets for you to use while you are sitting in the chairs along side the grave -- I know in movies and TV they always show people standing around, but all the funerals I've ever been to actually have folding chairs set up for people to sit on, and there's often a pop up canopy as well, which helps with the cold/wind/rain/snow.

 

[tcufrog]

Find out if there will be an outdoor component. If there is try to get some fleece tights or fleece lined leggings to put under dark dress pants. If you have a dressy darker sweater put that on with a thermal underwear shirt under it. If you have leather boots that will be perfect with warm socks (skiing sock liners will help). Add a long wool or cashmere scarf that you can also wrap around your head and ears and a very warm winter coat. Ask if any family members of his can loan you a coat in your size if you don't have one. This all won't keep you perfectly warm but it's cheaper than a whole new wardrobe.

 

[CalDisneyMomof2]

Thank you for all the suggestions! I'm not too sure of the details of it all but I will be taking everyone's advice. The weather is actually looking a bit warmer than originally thought. Even with the wind chill it might be over zero degrees. I think I'll be able to handle being outside after all! Thank you for your kind words, everyone!

 

[tcufrog]

I forgot to mention some good gloves that are on the longer side so you can put the cuff of the sweater over them, thus preventing the cold air from entering via your wrists.

 

[afan]

Even if there is an outside portion, I wouldn't purchase a new coat in black if it's not something you need or will wear again. If you need a warmer coat for the trip and will use it again, I would buy it in a color that you will wear again. No one is going to fault you for the color of your coat when you are just trying to stay warm and if they do that's on them.

I've been to winter funerals in Michigan for my grandmother and my father and the color or style of my coat was never a consideration. I'm sure others wore non black coats, mine was an almost lime green at my dad's, but I wasn't paying attention to what others were wearing. And as others have said, anything outside, at that temperature, will be short.

You may want to consider wearing an extra layer under your dress pants if you can, even if they are nylons or tights, because it will be cold and it may still be chilly inside. Dress warm and in layers for the whole trip as I'm sure some places will be toasty. Make sure to have a good scarf, gloves and hat/earmuffs.

 

[OrangeBirdGirl]

Sorry for your loss!

Sounds like you have a lot of great outfit recommendations. I'd just add, if you are going to wear heels, don't go barefoot. Something that you may always be doing in CA, in the cold you will likely want to wear some thin "trouser socks" if wearing pants as those are thin enough for dress shoes, yet could give you a little warmth.

There is likely going to be salt on the sidewalks going in everywhere (it melts the ice) but the salt sticks to your shoes and sometimes gets kicked up onto the back of your pants when you walk. The first thing i do each morning as I get into my office is go into the bathroom and wet a piece of towel and wipe off my shoes and check my pants for little white splotches of salt and wipe that off. LOL unless a major snowstorm then I'm wearing boots in with my pants tucked into them.

 

[SMD]

Generally I don't buy clothes for funerals, just make do with what I have. If someone wants to judge me because of the sweater I wore, that's baggage that they're bringing with them. You're already showing that you care by showing up and offering condolences and by your actions, not your clothing.

The one exception was, it rained the day of my great aunt's funeral. I was wearing brown pants and a black shirt. At the time I owned one coat and it was grey, because I live in So Cal, and that's all I need. The whole service was outside in the rain, so I wore it. My cousin marched over, ripped open the zipper and said I should really know that brown and grey don't go together. When my grandmother had a fatal heart attack a few months later my mother pulled me aside and said she thought that we should just go buy me some new pants so that he didn't make a similar scene again.

If I had to travel in winter for a funeral I would just wear the warmest coat and boots I own, or try to borrow something before I spent money on something other people will deem "more appropriate."

 

[Queen of the WDW Scene]

I'd wear black pants, black closed toe shoes, a top that is not too bold, maybe a cardigan over the top, and a coat.

I'd think most people would have those pieces in their woredrobe already besides the coat if you live in a warm climate.

 

[AquamarineSteph]

My condolences!

I have only done one funeral in severe weather conditions, and that was in Michigan. As far as I could tell, what I wore (dark skirt, dark top) worked just fine for the funeral, but it was the graveside part that nearly did me in. Find a coat. Borrow a long coat. Hat. Gloves. Muffler. And do not apologize for what you are wearing. In those weather conditions, I find that being practical tops all other considerations.

 

[sweetpeama]

Ok - California girl here! 40 degrees is cold to me. But when my husband's grandmother passed away a couple of weeks ago the question of what I'd wear to her funeral was the last thing on my mind. My husband and I are traveling to Sioux Falls/Yankton, South Dakota for her memorial service next Thursday and Funeral Friday.

What is appropriate to wear or are typical funeral "dress codes" completely out the door when it's that cold? It's supposed to be below zero which I've never done before. Any suggestions or tips to keep warm AND dress appropriately for a funeral in sub zero conditions when I've never been in any weather below 15 degrees?

And to make this budget related, let's try to keep suggestions semi-thrifty as I can't afford to go out and spend hundreds of dollars on a new winter wardrobe that I may never wear again.

Thanks![/QUOTE

First of all my condolances on your loss please pass onto your husband

I am from Montana but have family from that part of South Dakota and the rule is dress warm for a winter funeral

No one is going to care if your wearing a dress with hose and a low heal ok they will care that you don't end up slipping and on your hind end on the ground.

For comfort I would dress in layers so that you can be comfortable if either the service or the gathering afterwards is extremely warm you can take off an outer layer.

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Sorry have no idea of what size you would need but something like this is what I would put together. For outside you will need a heavier coat, gloves, some way to cover your head, and possibly a scarf and boots. For those items see if there is someone either a relative or if one of them has a friend you can borrow items from. If not to save money you can often find nice things at thrift shops.

I have attended the graveside service just about every month of the year including with 2 feet of snow on the ground. As a rule when it is bitter cold to people from that area it tends to be as short as possible without being rude and with the exception of saying a quick goodbye to those who are using their lunch break to be there there is not much visiting at the grave.

 

[prprincess]

Fleece lined tights or leggings! I have attended two funerals in the past month and both were during cold weather. I layered a cardigan over a long sleeved, knee-length dress and wore the tights/leggings underneath with high boots and high socks. I was definitely warmer than most at both burials.

 

[jedijill]

My grandmother passed away on Christmas 2 years ago in Northern Missouri. The funeral home set up a tent at the gravesite that helped cut the wind and kept it a bit warmer. The preacher also kept it fairly short. I wore dress pants and just bundled up.

Sorry for your loss.

Jill in CO

 

[angierae]

My sister's graveside service was less than ten minutes. They did a longer one inside the cemetery chapel, and then we moved to the graveside, the priest said a few words, they lowered her, and we left. I would see if a family member has an extra coat for you, but if there's a viewing/funeral home component, you'll be warm enough inside with whatever you would normally wear.

 

[yoopermom]

I was shocked when I moved here to the UP that they don't do outside burials once the ground is frozen. Even if there is an actual burial, it will be kept VERY short most likely.

Also remember that it may be quite warm in the actual funeral home (depending on whether they're expecting a crowd, especially if there are many elderly expected) so you may want to bring layers.

You may also find that it is more "casual" than what you are expecting (appropriate outfits for funerals is a common thread here on the DIS). I would dress "sensibly" for the weather/time of year, in somber colors, and call it good.

Winter travel in SD is never to be taken lightly, so make sure and have gloves/scarf/hat/etc for anytime that you are on the road.

Terri