Fortune Cookie Writers Apply Here!

[Tinkermommy]

I am starting a business in the lucrative field of Fortune Cookies. If you would like a job in this prestigious business, please respond with your best fortunes.

We are an equal opportunity employer. No experience is needed but you must be able to type on tiny typewriters.

And yes, you can get the summers off. Most people are grilling out then anyway.

 

[katesorad]

I'm in. I demand a jacuzzi in my office.. and my own personal chef who can make me eggplant parmesan on demand.

Oh sorry, I'm a idiot.. a fortune:

Close your blinds while you're changing. Your neighbor is up to no good. Your lucky numbers are 1, 14, and 27.

 

[JerseyJanice]

Don't eat the yellow snow!

 

[paintnolish]

I don't have a tiny typewriter, but I DO have the world's tiniest violin...and it's playing just for you!

 

[nmmom95]

Confucius say: "Woman who cooks corn & peas in same pot is very unsanitary."

 

[Beachbumpirates]

Confucius say: "Woman who cooks corn & peas in same pot is very unsanitary."

Confucius must have known my Grandfather. He used to always tell us to "eat every bean and pea on our plate"

 

[postage stamp]

I'm in. I demand a jacuzzi in my office.. and my own personal chef who can make me eggplant parmesan on demand.

Oh sorry, I'm a idiot.. a fortune:

Close your blinds while you're changing. Your neighbor is up to no good. Your lucky numbers are 1, 14, and 27.

I totally will. I LOVE making it and eating it, but it's the kind of thing you can't make just a little bit of, so I always have too much.

 

[postage stamp]

You will soon get a tattoo. Make sure it's something tasteful like a snake on your face.

 

[kirbsam]

on your deathbed you will receive total consciousness.

 

[nmmom95]

on your deathbed you will receive total consciousness.

So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

 

[memster]

Don't eat the yellow snow!

Good one!!

 

[kaytieeldr]

I'm in. I need my own massage chair.

Sample fortune (actual size):

A woman who who seeks to be equal with men lacks ambition.
Your lucky numbers are 4 9 16 25 36 49

 

[ready123go]

Close your blinds while you're changing. Your neighbor is up to no good. Your lucky numbers are 1, 14, and 27.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

You may have just won a million dollars.
1 2 3 4 5 6

 

[kaytieeldr]

Now is the time to make circles with mints. Do not hesitate any longer.
Lucky numbers 10 15 19 23 33 34
(okay, not original - I got it from a website )

Be alert. The world needs more lerts.
Lucky numbers 4 5 7 25 38 56

It is better to light one small candle than to stumble around in the dark
Lucky numbers 2 11 12 44 24 57

You can keep silent and be though a fool or speak and remove all doubt.
Lucky numbers 4 33 35 40 57 58