Fluff: weird things your spouses do (nothing serious, this is for fun)

[sweetandsassyfl]

Oh, and I have to tell on myself. I'm one of those can not be still, has to be doing something whether it's on the computer, reading, etc. I can't even go to lunch without either a book or my computer.

 

[thewesterberg]

My DH saw this thread open on the computer and said "Hey!" I told him I hadn't posted anything so calm down. He then proceeded to ask, "I don't do anything weird, do I?"



"Uh.... No. Sure honey."


(I'll be back when he forgets about this thread.... )

 

[thewesterberg]

Double post. Or maybe I was just anxious to spill the beans...

 

[beckmrk04]

This cracked me up.

It wouldn't if you had to hear it every day, trust me.


I was catching up on the rest of the responses and thought of two more (I really DO love my husband!):

1- He is the BIGGEST baby in the world when he's sick. It's pitiful. He acts like a minor cold or sinus infection might just be the end of him. His brother and dad are the exact same way. Babies. It's ridiculous.

OT- a story to illustrate my example.
One night, while I was about 8 months pregnant and DH was still working afternoons, he calls me, and says in the most pathetic voice, "I'm coming home..... I'm sick." Me: "Uh, ok? What's wrong?" DH: "I threw up." (Now, mind you, I was pregnant at the time and had spent the first 6 months of my pregnancy heaving my guts out- had hyperemesis, was hospitalized for a month, had a feeding tube- the works). Me: "Ok, are you that bad?" DH: "Have you ever thrown up so hard you saw spots?"

Me:"Nope- I only threw up so much I had to be hospitalized and put on home health care and have a feeding tube. How awful you must feel!"

2- He is always asking my opinion, then blatantly ignoring it. Like, DH: "What do you want for dinner?" Me: "Oh, how about spaghetti?" DH: "We could have ham." Me: "I'd really like spaghetti." DH: "What about pizza?" Me: "Why did you even ASK ME?"

Whew. I feel better.

 

[mfd25wife]

We never actually leave the house on the first attempt. We all go to the Tahoe. DH will realize he forgot something or needs to do something and leave us sitting in the truck to go back to his truck or in the house. It doesn't matter if we are going to eat, go on vacation, or just run errands. If we are headed to church, he gets in the vehicle and then realizes he needs his Bible.

He is late everywhere he goes except for work. He's 30 minutes early to work, but always late everywhere else. Even if it looks like we are on schedule, he will decide to do something like wash the vehicle before we leave.

He never totally finishes anything. I tease him that he gets 90-95% done and is on to something else. If he washes dishes, there's always some he doesn't get. If he folds clothes or hangs them up, he always leaves some. I waited almost a year for the baseboards to go back after he laid tile in the bathroom.

He is like a lot of yours, cabinet doors and drawers are always open. I can always tell what he ate or drank based on what's left on the counter. he hates to wear socks around the house so he takes both socks and shoes off as soon as he sits in the recliner. I pick them up because I hate looking at them. Clothes are still together if they were layered, or inside out. I tease him that he has an aversion to empty spaces. If I clean off an area, he fills it.

But, I have mine too. I'm slightly OCD so I cannot function if certain things are not where they go. He won't put up groceries cause he knows I have to stop everything and get them in the right place if I find the soups in with the vegetables. Glasses do not go with plastic cups, etc. He cannot hang my clothes in the closet because he says he would not get them in the right place. The ones that make it on a hanger go on the laundry room rod. I don't hardly ever do anything in silence. I have the tv or music on almost all the time.

 

[cheermom1]

My problem is the exact opposite, I may walk out of a room that I am coming right back too and he will have gone and turned off the light before I can ever get back.

hey mine does the same thing then doesn't understand why i get frustrated

 

[NotUrsula]

Wow...I feel so much better. It seems none of them replace the toilet paper ...
...
I also thought of a sneezing one...Every time DH has to sneeze he jumps up off the couch (or wherever) and runs to a lamp and sticks his head in it to make himself sneeze. If it's light outside, he runs to the window. Pretty funny to watch....

See, now I have to tell on myself. I tend to forget the toilet paper, and THAT is DH's #1 peeve with me. (Of course, he is so compulsive about this particular issue that he'll replace it with 1/4 inch thickness of paper left on the roll, and then we have all these rolls piled up on the back of the toilet with about 3 feet of paper left on each of them.)

I'm a photic sneezer, too, and the kids inherited the trait from me. (DH calls us the Sneeze Mutants.) For some odd reason I tend to feel a bit nauseous when I've got a sneeze coming on, and I too have been known to seek out a bright light to trigger it and get it over with so that the nausea will go away. Also, whenever I sneeze from a light trigger I always sneeze twice. I'm that lady that you see at WDW who comes out of a ride building into the Florida sun, sneezes, and has the man standing next to her announce out loud, "OK, wait for it ..." before my second sneeze hits.

 

[starrzone]

Originally Posted by Pooh's Pixie
He simply refuses to put a new roll of toilet paper on the roller thingy. He will get it from the closet (sometimes), and place it on the back of the toilet or the sink. I'm like, "You sit there long enough, just put it on the roller!" I mean, the man has a doctorate, I think he can figure it out!

Ditto. I understand being too lazy to put the roll on the holder, but sometimes he goes all the way to the other bathroom to bring a fresh roll back and then still sets it on top of the roller. He's already gone the distance and done the hard part, why would he not do the easy part? I just don't get it.

I don't have a spouse or DP, but my brothers used to do this (and probably still do) and it drove me NUTS. I started getting all passive-aggressive and if they left the toilet paper on the back of the toilet, I would then hide it for my own personal use and make sure that the bathroom was devoid of any additional toilet paper so that they would have to go find their own. Ughhhhhh...LAZINESS!!!

 

[suprgrlx]

My husband does a lot of the other things listed (puts stuff down randomly, leaves cupboards open, etc). But the weird/frustrating ones are:

1. He cannot sit in the car in a parking lot. If we pull into a parking space, we have to get out right away. If I stop to ask him something before we get out, it's "come on let's get out of the car, we look silly!" I'm not sure who he thinks is judging us or why what we're doing is so silly!

2. If he stays home sick for the day, he's committed. Now, I used to have to do this when I was younger, by my parents' rule. However, as an adult, I feel that I am capable of deciding when I am feeling up to going out. However, if my husband is sick in the morning and stays home, at 2:00 he won't even go downstairs with me to the pharmacy to get medicine. Even though it's attached (so no outside) and he's now feeling totally fine, and I have to carry something heavy, he won't go.

 

[Cool-Beans]

I've seen this thread for a couple days and kept thinking, "Well, there must be something odd about him...something uniquely annoying..." but there isn't.

The only thing odd about DH is how normal he is. It's like living with Andy Griffith. He's a smart guy, head screwed on straight, morals and priorities in place, can be counted on to do the right thing, a lot of fun sometimes...but not weird.

Sometimes he leaves his underwear on the floor. Because, he says, "the underwear fairy comes along and picks it up." Andy wouldn't do that, I guess.

 

[jeepgirl30]

You know the saying be careful what you wish for? My DH is a neat freak. Drives me nuts. Everything has to be put away immediately. Vacumn marks have to be in the carpets or "OMG the house is a COMPLETE disaster".

He cleans out my car. He refuses to ride in my car but yet he'll go and clean it out. Now I don't mean my car is messy and he cleans the junk out but he'll remove everything like umbrellas, my purse, the car seats, etc. I need those things.

He is no longer allowed in the kitchen when i'm cooking because I'd put a spoon down, turn around and he'd be washing it or have put it in the dishwasher.

He will occassionally go through closets and just freak out that the entire house is a mess because the kids craft cupboard is not organized. He also goes through the shoe closet and tosses shoes of mine that he feels are not properly put away. This means they are not aligned exactly.

The one thing that drives me completely nuts though, he will put his laptop bag against the wall in the foyer. No one else is allowed to leave anything out yet he can leave is bag in the middle of the foyer?

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Jeepgirl: Your post reminded me of my friend's roommates the last college program I did.

My friend is from BYU and they have the option of living in a building that only has other people from BYU (none of us heathens ). She took that option and ended up with roommates who are complete and total neat freaks. My friend is not messy by any means, but they were over the top. For those who don't know, we have apartment inspections every few months. When inspection time came her roommates made sure the vacuum lines were parallel! There was a path to get from her bedroom to the bathroom or kitchen because God forbid shestep on a vacuum line.

I thought she was exaggerating, then I went over to her apartment one day and saw a sign on the wall, "A clean room makes Jesus smile." I would not have gotten along with them at all.

 

[CandCMommy]

I can't stop laughing at all these!

Where to begin with my DH:

Played the drums so he has to tap, strum, or drum on something at all times.

While driving somewhere, he frequently forgets where we're going. I'll have to remind him at the last second he needs to exit, etc. The one time that he remembers where we're going and I remind him he gets upset with me.

It takes an act of congress to get him to take or get things from our storage unit. Case in point, the Christmas boxes and tree box are still sitting in my dining room waiting to go back to storage and have been sitting there since Thanksgiving.

And the most annoying thing: When he does the dishes and "cleans" up the kitchen, he NEVER EVER wipes off the counters! I will go in there and there will be dried food, spilled milk whatever just sitting on the counter. Hello, part of cleaning the kitchen is WIPING OFF THE COUNTERS!!

 

[Katieinwonderland]

DH is ALWAYS too hot, so no matter what the temperature outside, the fans are all on, even if the house is freezing.

He also constantly 'hangs' things...when he has nothing to do, he'll walk round with a hammer and nails and put hooks into the walls, you know, for 'stuff' - he puts them in the bathroom for my to hang my hairbands on (what's wrong with the drawer they live in now?), he'll hang hooks in the closet for me "to hang my shoes"????!!!! Why would I hang my shoes up???!!!

The most annoying is that he walks PAST the dishwasher to put his dishes in the sink, will fill them with water to soak...and LEAVE THEM THERE!!! Now I know some things need to be soaked, but a glass that has had WATER in it???!!! It can go straight into the dishwasher!!!

But I love him loads anyway!!!

 

[SharpMomOfTwo]

My Dh will have a glass of milk, and when hes finished, he will then turn it over in the sink so if I don't get to it right away there will be a milk ring on my sink - it really bugs me (god forbid he just puts it in the dishwasher himself. Another thing he does that bugs me is when hes scooping ice cream, he uses a big spoon, but wont eat with that spoon. NOOOOOO He has to go and dirty another SMALLER spoon to eat with!! Oooh!!!!
One thing that I do that bothers him is I spread my toes appart - he can't do it, and it really freeks him out. I just think its funny!!

 

[Katieinwonderland]

Also, while driving, DH makes split second decisions...whoops, I need to turn left here (full speed sharp turn), oops, the car in front of me is stopped (jams on brakes). Really though he is not that bad a driver, but every car horn honk in earshot is taken personally. 99% of the honks are not meant for him, but he gets defensive about them anyway.

Just wanted to add that DH is EXACTLY the same! "Oh I was supposed to turn there so I'll just turn at 60 miles an hour on two wheels and now I need to pass this truck so I'll wait until I'm 6 inches away and then go round." And the horn thing? Every driver on the road is out to get him! That person who cut him off totally did it on purpose, that person who honked their horn four blocks away was meant for me...he's a New Yorker, and maybe it comes from driving in the city up there but he is the WORST defensive driver!!!

 

[thewesterberg]

he'll hang hooks in the closet for me "to hang my shoes"????!!!! Why would I hang my shoes up???!!!

That caused me to burst out laughing!!

 

[denisenh]

dh does most of the annoying things on this thread....not completing a task, leaving clothes on the floor by the bed, leaving empty bottles for someone else to throw away, not replacing tp, etc, etc, etc

He also spends more time grooming himself than a teenage girl AND he holds his eating utensil like a child...with a grip and too close to the "in the mouth" part. drives me nuts.

I usually tolerate all of it, other times i say to myself "counting the days".

 

[Stacerita]

I just remembered something else that just bugs me. Everytime I am going to take a shower, I say "I'm gonna hop/jump into the shower" He responds with "Don't fall" or "Be careful". He does this every time. It just bugs me.

 

[JVL1018]

Let me preface this by saying I love my husband to death, he knows that all the following drive me nuts, so I am not talking behind his back.


1. He clicks the salt and pepper shaker together before using them- Click click shake shake. That is my #1 pet peeve. He does it just to bug me now. LOL

2. He flips the channels CONSTANTLY. Which I guess is a normal man thing, but he'll leave it on and even though I'm doing something else, I hear just enough for me to get intrigued and start watching and then-- SWITCH!
Like the news will be on and they'll tell a story about a crime and yada yada yada.."and the suspect has been caught..shockingly he was"-SWITCH!
Come on!
He says I didn't think you were watching..I said well I wasn't until I heard the story, how can you watch a whole story and then change channels right before the conclusion?? It drives me insane!

3. He's also a drummer which means he's a tapper. Constant tapping..

4. Thought of one more, he'll use the toaster oven and leave the door open when he's done.
I say why do you always leave the door open? He says, so it cools off.
WTH? It's an oven. Does it matter if the interior is warm? I don't finsih using the regular oven and leave the door open to cool it. weird.