Fish Extenders- Favorite & Least Favorite Gifts?

[dreamer17555]

I disagree with most of this. I find it sort of obnoxious for people to sign up for a FE exchange and then proceed to tell the group what they should or should not be given, or to create pressure to make sure people are giving out gifts that are personalized and/or include your favorite character, color, etc. Everyone has different amounts of creativity, time and/or budgets to dedicate to putting together the gifts they give out.

Anyone who is going to be annoyed if they get gifts that are not up to whatever standards they have created probably shouldn't be participating.

Like people tell their kids..."you get what you get, and you don't get upset."

Would you buy a birthday present for someone without putting any thought into it?

Isn't the whole point of FEs to focus on giving (which means thinking of what the other person enjoys)? I want to know what others like and want so I can give gifts that they will use and love and do not get thrown out. I started this thread to brainstorm ideas for gifts that others have enjoyed because my focus is on giving gifts that will not end up in a landfill.

If the plan is to just give whatever items regardless of what the recipient will enjoy, why not just pixie dust items (unless you want to be sure to be given gifts back)? Are you sharing favorite character, ages of your party etc when you are signing up? Why should they take your party into consideration if you aren't willing to do it back? FE's are optional.

I have a severe food allergy. There is a reason I say no food. Would you rather spend your money and give me something I will be throwing out, okay that's your choice...

 

[Oldie13]

I disagree with most of this. I find it sort of obnoxious for people to sign up for a FE exchange and then proceed to tell the group what they should or should not be given, or to create pressure to make sure people are giving out gifts that are personalized and/or include your favorite character, color, etc. Everyone has different amounts of creativity, time and/or budgets to dedicate to putting together the gifts they give out.

Anyone who is going to be annoyed if they get gifts that are not up to whatever standards they have created probably shouldn't be participating.

Like people tell their kids..."you get what you get, and you don't get upset."

See I’ve never done this but thought it might be neat to do, like pixie dusting at the parks/resorts. My understand is when people sign up for these you end up with like 5-10 other cabins to gift AND it’s each day the cruise goes. That in and of itself is enough planning, but to now keep straight likes/dislikes/wants/unwants of the people in that room, tailor the gifts to meet those demands ANd make sure they get to the right room? Nahh, I’m out.

 

[TheRichFam]

I disagree with most of this. I find it sort of obnoxious for people to sign up for a FE exchange and then proceed to tell the group what they should or should not be given, or to create pressure to make sure people are giving out gifts that are personalized and/or include your favorite character, color, etc. Everyone has different amounts of creativity, time and/or budgets to dedicate to putting together the gifts they give out.

Anyone who is going to be annoyed if they get gifts that are not up to whatever standards they have created probably shouldn't be participating.

Like people tell their kids..."you get what you get, and you don't get upset."

I tend to agree. Preferences and expectations are VERY different things.

 

[dreamer17555]

I tend to agree. Preferences and expectations are VERY different things.

I didn't say I had that expectation but again I do not want to waste my money on giving gifts they don't want and I would assume others would not want to spend money on food I can't have. It is a preference that you do not give me food because I will not be consuming it

ETA- I would never say a word if given food, but I hate that they spent money on something I dont feel good about passing along and cannot use. I have had sailings where I had groups who signed up and received gifts but never dropped anything and it was fine but it is not IMO the spirit of the thing and I understood why others in our exchange group were upset about it.

 

[dreamer17555]

See I’ve never done this but thought it might be neat to do, like pixie dusting at the parks/resorts. My understand is when people sign up for these you end up with like 5-10 other cabins to gift AND it’s each day the cruise goes. That in and of itself is enough planning, but to now keep straight likes/dislikes/wants/unwants of the people in that room, tailor the gifts to meet those demands ANd make sure they get to the right room? Nahh, I’m out.

That is not how it works.

You sign up for a group size (5 or 10 is normal, in a group of 5 you would gift to 4 cabins and 4 cabins would gift to you). And it is generally one gift for the entire sailing (some like to split smaller gifts to be delivered on two days) but no one is dropping a gift each day of a 7 night sailing for 10 staterooms (some 70 gift drops). Most people are doing 4 gift drops in total and are part of a group of 5.

 

[Oldie13]

That is not how it works.

You sign up for a group size (5 or 10 is normal, in a group of 5 you would gift to 4 cabins and 4 cabins would gift to you). And it is generally one gift for the entire sailing (some like to split smaller gifts to be delivered on two days) but no one is dropping a gift each day of a 7 night sailing for 10 staterooms (some 70 gift drops). Most people are doing 4 gift drops in total and are part of a group of 5.

I can tell you I HAVE read of there being ones where gifts are done every day. I wouldn’t have said it if I hadn’t read/heard of it.

 

[dreamer17555]

I can tell you I HAVE read of there being ones where gifts are done every day. I wouldn’t have said it if I hadn’t read/heard of it.

That is beyond atypical. Sometimes groups organize so a different cabin drops a gift on different days (like Cabin A gives out gifts on day two, Cabin B on day four) to spread the deliveries out over a sailing but even that isn’t super common and optional

It might be smart to message whoever is organizing the FE on your sailings so they can clarify their expectations. Daily gifts are not something I have seen on my 12 sailings with DCL since 2020

 

[sponica]

Would you buy a birthday present for someone without putting any thought into it?

To be fair, I do this all the time for the 8 zillion kids parties my kids go to. People I know get more bandwidth, random classmate number 30 gets legos or whatever.

But that's neither here nor there.

We're not FE people (luggage space is at a premium and I don't want to deal with it) but it looks like the one for our sailing has super small groups (4 cabins) sorted by whether it's families or adults only.

 

[llachance]

All of the above is why I no longer participate at all. I have received some fun things over the years. I have never given individual gifts but a gift for the stateroom. Back when everyone played CDs I made CDs with the cruise ship and date of the cruise and filled it with Disney Caribbean Melodys. Once, on a very Merrytime Cruise I gave a one month countdown to Christmas Calendar that was disney themed. Another time I got a really good deal on small photo albums that had the DCL logo on them. But I will never tell anyone that I "didn't like" something that was gifted to me no matter how big or small - it is a gift and the one upmanship has gotten out of control.

 

[lanejudy]

I have a feeling its because a network of people who run the groups also sell items, so they gain financially from not specifying a gift limit. The one upmanship with the gifts , people doing multiple drops, and the subtle pressure into thinking you should give more makes them money, so they discourage a suggested spend.

Actually, anyone can run an FE group using any platform. The current trend towards those on a social media not to be named seems to be impacted more than old-school FE groups.

Isn't the whole point of FEs to focus on giving (which means thinking of what the other person enjoys)?

Yes, but there can be generic FE gifts. No need to be that individual unless someone so chooses.

See I’ve never done this but thought it might be neat to do, like pixie dusting at the parks/resorts.

That's how Fish Exchanges started out. They've gotten to be a lot more "involved" over the years -- expectations, rules, price caps, kids-only, adults-only, etc. Each is somewhat different.

 

[leannak]

We liked getting little battery-powered nightlights, customized with our kids’ favorite characters. (Homemade w/circuit I think?)
We liked getting leather bracelets, custom colors for favorite characters and we got pirate leather bracelets on pirate night! (from Etsy)
We liked getting Disney card/trivia games for adults and kids.
We liked getting real Disney pins… like one pin from a set per person.
We liked getting practical items like Disney tissue packets, baby powder and brushes to remove sand at beach, and magnetic hooks.
We liked getting (homemade) crochet character dolls.
We liked getting little Disney bath toys when our kids were young… like Nemo
We liked getting flag magnets for the countries we visited on our ship. We received new ones each port day. These were either homemade or Etsy.

We didn’t like big things so much… like cups and sundae sets… just too big to haul and we already had brought cups.

 

[Snowwhyt]

I am from Ireland. I have been travelling to America for over 20 years. American chocolate to me is not nice. Thats why I said no American chocolate.

I’m from America and don’t like American chocolates just tastes like sugar. Although at Christmas I have an exchange with a group that posts entertaining photos and sayings. Just to not hurt anyone else I state how much I love dark chocolate in my bio. Then I always get some dark chocolate as a gift. American chocolate is sold here by the bag at grocery stores and in every checkout line where you can pull out your wallet. So some people just love it.

The point of giving an FE gift should be about thinking what the other person will like, use, and enjoy. I always put no food and there is a good reason for that. It is not about being greedy. It is about not wanting the other person to spend money and time on getting something that won't be enjoyed. I will also not pass along food because I do not know where it came from and I am overly cautious.

I would love if more people shared when signing up for FE things they dont want. I don't want to waste my money and effort on gift that might end up donated or at worst thrown out.

I see how you look at this as a Christmas gift or one-on-one type of exchange. I see it more like a party where you bring a gift and you don’t know who will get it. So I like to pick something special that will be nice for the group.
I’ve made everyone a DCL hamper by stenciling DCL on the hamper the logo. Takes me a hour to make each. Downside I didn’t feel it was as much of a guy gift.
I made a dry-erase countdown to the next cruise it was sort of a Caribbean blue probably not gonna go in everyone’s decor took me about 45 minutes each. I embroider names on an oversized polkadot print makeup bag. They probably owned something much nicer but this has the ship name or date. Took me about 45 minutes each to make.

Wow, seriously???? I don't like something, a personal preference, and thats elitist??? Why does it bother you that I don't like American chocolate?

I didn’t want you to get stuck with stuff you don’t like. But you don’t want people to be hurt or offended. (Or called elitist either!) You will get more love from the place of YES than NO. Tell them of your love, not your hate and nobody will even question your request.
For example, if somebody said, let’s go out to a movie tonight, what do you want to see? You could say I love rom-com’s, instead of I hate sci-fi.
You ever heard those rephrasing jokes? It’s just basically ways of telling your boss that they have a bad idea without making them look/feel bad. I support your dislike but think you can come out smelling like a rose and most likely still get what you want.

 

[Henlady]

The last FE group I participated in had 10 in our group. I gave a hinged wooden trinket box with a hand painted beach scene on the lid and a couple magnets inside. I received a total of 6 gifts out of 9 in return. 3 were really nice, of the other 3, one was a single square of Ghiardelli chocolate, one was a snack size baggie of hard candy, and one was a company advertisement pen and likewise small note pad. Granted items could possibly have been stolen from the FE.
I decided to try a pixie dusting group this time and realistically expect nothing in return. Just a friendly gesture on my part.

 

[Lucien Franciosa]

The last FE group I participated in had 10 in our group. I gave a hinged wooden trinket box with a hand painted beach scene on the lid and a couple magnets inside. I received a total of 6 gifts out of 9 in return. 3 were really nice, of the other 3, one was a single square of Ghiardelli chocolate, one was a snack size baggie of hard candy, and one was a company advertisement pen and likewise small note pad. Granted items could possibly have been stolen from the FE.
I decided to try a pixie dusting group this time and realistically expect nothing in return. Just a friendly gesture on my part.

okay... I have been on 4 cruises and I am aware of what fish extenders are.. but a tad naive still... where do you find FE groups, and whats the difference between that and 'pixie dusting group.'

 

[Bad Pink Tink 2.0]

okay... I have been on 4 cruises and I am aware of what fish extenders are.. but a tad naive still... where do you find FE groups, and whats the difference between that and 'pixie dusting group.'

The Fish Extender Exchanges were started here on Disboards for the 2005 Panama Cruise. There was a pre cruise planning thread and one of the members wanted to give gifts to everyone who had been helpful during the planning.

After the cruise they came back here to Disboards and started talking about the gifts. Everyone loved the idea and in other pre cruise planning threads people started organizing gift exchanges.

This was before social media and Disboards was one of the main places for cruise information. But many travel agents started going to far and actively soliciting for business in the cruise meet up threads, so they were banned from doing advertising on here. That was around the time social media started becoming popular, so when the travel agents were banned from advertising here, they went to the book of faces.

There is a network of people who organise cruise meet up groups on social media. They also took the fish extender exchange idea to their new groups. The most active cruise meet up groups and the fish extender exchanges are now on the book of faces.

There are still cruise meet up threads here on Dis and anyone can set up a fish extender exchange. But as the Fish extender exchanges require a group of people, you really need to go to other places to participate nowadays, as most cruise meet up threads here on Disboards are not active.

Pixie Dusting is another passenger to passenger activity. You dont have to be in the cruise meet up groups to take part. Its similar to Fish Extender , as in you give small gifts to people on your cruise, by putting them in the holders at peoples door. But its not a mutual exchange, as in you give out gifts and you might or might not get gifts.

 

[brentm77]

I am from Ireland. I have been travelling to America for over 20 years. American chocolate to me is not nice. Thats why I said no American chocolate.

I had chocolate every single day the last time I was in Ireland. It was so good there. I fully agree with you on this one.

 

[LadyGrace]

We really liked the light cards cause it meant we didn't have to use our room keys!
We also liked getting magnets for the door and a little mini fan that plugs into our phone
Least favorite is probably food, it's just too complicated with allergies and transporting.

I'm doing a fish extender this time but i think i got too excited and bought too much lol -- anyone think people would be unhappy getting a larger FE gift bag??

 

[Erica1016]

We really liked the light cards cause it meant we didn't have to use our room keys!
We also liked getting magnets for the door and a little mini fan that plugs into our phone
Least favorite is probably food, it's just too complicated with allergies and transporting.

I'm doing a fish extender this time but i think i got too excited and bought too much lol -- anyone think people would be unhappy getting a larger FE gift bag??

I guess if you think the FE bags are too big you could pixie dust some of the extra stuff?

 

[ComeToSocialize]

Didn’t say that at all. It’s the way you said it. It has ZERO to do with American chocolate or you liking or not liking something.

It’s akin if someone put “no generic, brand name only” or “no store bought, must be handmade”.

To be fair, European chocolate is not more "elitist" than American chocolate. Sure there are fancy Swiss or Belgian chocolates. But the basic chocolate you get at a supermarket checkout aisle tastes different in Europe than America.

It's more like saying "I don't like sour candy, give me sweet candy" or "I don't like citrus fruit" or something. Not elitist or frankly even that picky.

To me, if the gift is age appropriate, easy to pack (or not meant to leave the ship) and shows some effort (which a $1.29 Hershey bar does not) that's perfectly fine.

 

[Oldie13]

To be fair, European chocolate is not more "elitist" than American chocolate. Sure there are fancy Swiss or Belgian chocolates. But the basic chocolate you get at a supermarket checkout aisle tastes different in Europe than America.

It's more like saying "I don't like sour candy, give me sweet candy" or "I don't like citrus fruit" or something. Not elitist or frankly even that picky.

To me, if the gift is age appropriate, easy to pack (or not meant to leave the ship) and shows some effort (which a $1.29 Hershey bar does not) that's perfectly fine.

Again, missing the point. This has ZERO to do with the chocolate itself. If they had said “No Mickey, Minnie only”, I would have said the same thing.
This has ALL to do with the wording of it. Just like your statement says “I don’t like ______, GIVE ME ______.”
“I don’t like citrus fruit”—perfect. But the whole “don’t want this, I want that” should NOT be an acceptable way to do things.