Feeling guilty

[mattmommy]

DH and waited a few years to have a child. We went to WDW every year, now we enjoy the magic with our ds9 and I can't imagine going without him.

I mean, what's the point of having kids to just drop them off and go have fun. We had our nightclubs and vacations before we had him and he'll be off to college before we blink.

Maybe that was mean and I'll get some flames, but that's the way I feel.

 

[JennMouse32]

DH and waited a few years to have a child. We went to WDW every year, now we enjoy the magic with our ds9 and I can't imagine going without him.

I mean, what's the point of having kids to just drop them off and go have fun. We had our nightclubs and vacations before we had him and he'll be off to college before we blink.

Maybe that was mean and I'll get some flames, but that's the way I feel.

some ppl just need breaks.. its no biggie...everyone needs breaks every so often.. even if just for a weekend .. and its not like the kids will be alon in the Op's case.. they will be with grandma, which as stated by another person is like disneyworld for a kid, they get spoiled by their grandma.. i personally wouldnt have cared if my parents left me with my grandma for a week and they went somewher, i loved spending time wiht my grandma.. didnt spend enough time as far as im concerned... and its not like they wont bring anything back for the kids...​

 

[Halbleib1]

I couldn't do it. My son would never let me live it down. He loves Disney World and I could not imagine going without him. Part of the fun for me is seeing it through my son's eyes.

 

[Zeebs]

We probably wouldn't got to disney as it is a 9 hour flight for us, but I would love to have family close to watch the kids so my husband and I can go away for a weekend of alone time.

We have had a total of 3 nights out together since our first was born 4 years ago.

Love my kids, but would love an uninterupted night with just my husband to.

Anyone want a couple of kids for a weekend.

Kirsten

 

[Halbleib1]

Just out of curiosity: for all the people who have said NO...they wouldn't go without their kids....is it because the OP is going to Disney? Or, would you NEVER take a trip without your child(ren)?

Now that that question is out of the way...Yes! Yes! Yes! Go without your kids. My husband and I are doing the same thing in May. We have been trying to take an anniversary trip for three years! Our work schedules just haven't allowed us to take time for just us. We do A LOT for our kids and provide them with basically anything they want/need...within reason, of course. So, I do not feel guilty for going without them. My husband and I usually try to take a trip (long weekend) at least once a year without our kids. But, like I said, our work schedules have prevented that for the last few years. And like a PP said, I think it shows your kids that you value your marriage and want to spend time with just your spouse. Go and enjoy your trip!

I said No only because it is Disney and my son love's it there. As a pp said my son also talks about it all the time and would be very disappointed if we went back without him. Esp. if we were not taking him any time soon.

If we were going somewhere like Vegas or some place romantic where I do not feel that my son would enjoy himself or that is more adult oriented than I could see leaving him home.

 

[Planogirl]

I cherish the times I spent with my grandmothers when I was a kid and that was at all ages. My one grandmother lived in the country and I spent a few weeks every summer with her. My other lived in Europe and I once traveled alone as a teen and spent several weeks with her.

Whether you go to WDW or even anywhere at all I urge everyone to let your kids spend time with their grandparents if they're decent people. It's great for everyone IMO!

 

[Kay1]

No. Not a single chance. To me, solo trips are for retirement, when the kids are off at college or married and living in their own homes. For young children, Disney is pure magic and they make things magical for us. There will be plenty of time for solo trips in the future but children are young for such a very short time.

 

[Suellen]

Whether you go to WDW or even anywhere at all I urge everyone to let your kids spend time with their grandparents if they're decent people. It's great for everyone IMO!

It isn't like because I don't travel without my kids = they don't see their grandparents.

Well truth be told they don't see the inlaws often ~ but that is a whole other story.

My girls are very close to my mother. The spend a ton of time with her and would probably point to her if you asked them who they loved most in the whole wide world (this makes me sad but it is true).

My mother just travels with us to WDW once a year ~ we don't have to leave the kids with her for a week for her to enjoy them.

 

[JennMouse32]

No. Not a single chance. To me, solo trips are for retirement, when the kids are off at college or married and living in their own homes. For young children, Disney is pure magic and they make things magical for us. There will be plenty of time for solo trips in the future but children are young for such a very short time.

there is an issue with doing that in retirement.. not everyone is in good enough health at that age to do it!!! unlike you it seems who is gonna be in perfect health their entire life.. sorry i know that is snotty.. but my mom is one of those in bad health.. and she always tells me to do it while i can cuz you might not always be in the health to.. so i take great offense to it.. when someone assumes everyone is gonna be in good enough health to do things like that and just becaue they have kids they shouldnt when they are healthy and able to..​

 

[Halbleib1]

there is an issue with doing that in retirement.. not everyone is in good enough health at that age to do it!!! unlike you it seems who is gonna be in perfect health their entire life.. sorry i know that is snotty.. but my mom is one of those in bad health.. and she always tells me to do it while i can cuz you might not always be in the health to.. so i take great offense to it.. when someone assumes everyone is gonna be in good enough health to do things like that and just becaue they have kids they shouldnt when they are healthy and able to..​

So true. Many people do not even live to retirement age. If it is something that you feel really strongly about and would feel that you missed out and would regret it if you did not do it than I would say go for it. I do not feel that strongly about going to Disney without my son but I can see where some might.

 

[JennMouse32]

So true. Many people do not even live to retirement age. If it is something that you feel really strongly about and would feel that you missed out and would regret it if you did not do it than I would say go for it. I do not feel that strongly about going to Disney without my son but I can see where some might.

exctly... so given the chance and you know your kids will be spoiled while you were gona anyways.., i say why not​

 

[MichelleVW]

DH and waited a few years to have a child. We went to WDW every year, now we enjoy the magic with our ds9 and I can't imagine going without him.

I mean, what's the point of having kids to just drop them off and go have fun. We had our nightclubs and vacations before we had him and he'll be off to college before we blink.

Maybe that was mean and I'll get some flames, but that's the way I feel.

Just because I have children doesn't mean I am not part of a couple. Couple time is very important to a relationship. My parents went on alone vacations when I was a child and I did the same with mine and everyone is still well adjusted and loved with no resentment!

No. Not a single chance. To me, solo trips are for retirement, when the kids are off at college or married and living in their own homes. For young children, Disney is pure magic and they make things magical for us. There will be plenty of time for solo trips in the future but children are young for such a very short time.

Well, I look at it this way, your spouse could get hit by a bus/cancer/whatever tomorrow, so I say enjoy the time you have today and don't put off alone time until the children are gone.

 

[kehlyrsmom]

WDW holds a special place for us both as a couple and a family. We spent our honeymoon at WDW which was my husbands first trip. Both of our kids love Disney though my son does more so than my daughter. We got the new Disney vaction planning DVD back in January and I think he has watched it every night before he goes to bed since then. Yes, I feel bad for not taking them, but we also have a trip planned with them this fall and we have gone every year since 06 with them. They are going to get to spend time with both sets of grandparents, plus we are going when they are still in school, we already take them out of school for 4 days in September.

In this day and age where I know so many people who are divorced, currently going through a divorce etc. I really feel that parents need to spend some couple time together, if you can't do that now and then while the kids are young what is it going to be like when the kids move out and you have nothing in common anymore. My aunt who has been married for 37 years is getting divorced, her and her exhusband never went on a vaction together nor did they go as a family. Because he never wanted to go anywhere. Now he has taken his new "FRIEND" and on several short trips in the last two months since he decieded to leave my aunt.

 

[smidgy]

DH and waited a few years to have a child. We went to WDW every year, now we enjoy the magic with our ds9 and I can't imagine going without him.

I mean, what's the point of having kids to just drop them off and go have fun. We had our nightclubs and vacations before we had him and he'll be off to college before we blink.

Maybe that was mean and I'll get some flames, but that's the way I feel.

you make the kids sound like a sack of potatoes! they are going to spend time with their grandparents, not staying in a kennel!

there are many points of having kids. building ahealthy family is an investment of time. if the foundation is weak, the whole thing crumbles.
the best gift you can give your kids is a mom and dad who work on their realtionship.

yes, there are many ways to do this. going away together, sans children, is one. if you couldn't do it yourself, fine. however, there is NOTHING wrong with doing so.

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

Just out of curiosity: for all the people who have said NO...they wouldn't go without their kids....is it because the OP is going to Disney? Or, would you NEVER take a trip without your child(ren)?

I feel guilty going away any place period, whether it's a one night thing or a few nights , but usually my girls don't have a problem with it, it's just me.

However, they would be very sad if I went to Disney without them. My mother goes to Florida several times a year (not to Disney) and my girls don't like that she is so close to Disney without them. That is our place. We go every year with my mom. I wouldn't be able to ride anything or eat anything because we always talk about those things. I could not enjoy myself, it would be a waste of money.

That's just me. and I don't think less of anyone that does go without their children. I would just feel way too guilty.

 

[megan926]

Definitely go for it!

 

[Cee]

No question, do it. Disney has so much to offer adults. You will see it in a whole new light. Enjoy it, each other and think of it as an opportunity to re-charge your battery. You love those boys and you owe it to them to take good care of their parents. Have the time of your life.

 

[Kay1]

there is an issue with doing that in retirement.. not everyone is in good enough health at that age to do it!!! unlike you it seems who is gonna be in perfect health their entire life.. sorry i know that is snotty.. but my mom is one of those in bad health.. and she always tells me to do it while i can cuz you might not always be in the health to.. so i take great offense to it.. when someone assumes everyone is gonna be in good enough health to do things like that and just becaue they have kids they shouldnt when they are healthy and able to..​

I take your point, JennMouse, but there was absolutely no need to adopt a "snotty" tone to make that point. The OP welcomed all opinions and I expressed mine, which I still hold.

 

[Tara]

OP - last March I went to Disneyland Paris and then spend a day (1 night, most of next day) at WDW within 2 weeks - both totally on my own. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter a hill of beans what anyone else thinks here. You have to do what works for you. One thing I have learned after many years on the DIS is that people are going to judge you no matter what you do! I love my DS with everything I am, but that doesn't mean I'm not still a distinct *I*...or that DH and I are only parents and not a couple. I think you have to take care of your self and your marriage as well as take care of your child/children.

 

[Rita007]

I would LOVE to go to WDW with just the hubby, but I don't know if I could actually DO it...my girls would go crazy with jealousy, and I'd be overwhelmed with guilt! Of course I could never lie to them and so at their current ages (yes, they're still young) I just don't see it happening although I'd love to do it.

We went away to Vegas last year by ourselves for 4 days and it was GREAT!!!! Kids missed us a lot but survived (I know, I know, shocking isn't it!). They were mad that we left but understood that it was a grownup place. The homecoming was wonderful of course!

I also would love to go to Disney with each of my girls separately, but once again I'd have to duck and cover as they plant the old stink eye on me