Fear of Darkness - any tips?

[mark2741]

My daughter is afraid of the dark. Unfortunately my wife has fostered this fear by insisting on allowing her to leave the upstairs laundry closet light on all night every night (the closet is directly opposite my daughter's bedroom door so the light shines in some). She's now 5 years old and when we've gone to WDW (once, when she had just turned 4) and to museums in which they have shows, almost every one of them has moments of total or close to total darkness. Even gives me the chills : ) So my daughter won't even go into them. Invariably I'm sitting outside with her and missing all of the shows.

We're going to WDW in March and I was hoping people had some suggestions for helping my daughter gain the confidence to go into these shows.

I read somewhere about letting the kids pick out/buy a lighted toy to bring with them into the rides, but I'd imagine that won't fly in a show as it would be rude/distracting to others. Perhaps a small 'mickey' flashlight and have them shine it at their feet?

any ideas?

 

[bjscheel]

DD7 never liked the dark rides at ages 3 and 5, so this trip we brought a teeny tiny flashlight we got at Pikes Peak (about the size of a pinky finger). We clipped it onto our backpack. She used it at the beginning of Pirates and shone it on our legs or seat. But by the end of the ride she was loving Captain Jack! (I think it helped that Davy Jones was not working)

I don't think she would have gotten on if we hadn't had it. Worth a try.

 

[brandylouwho]

OP, you sound a bit like my hubby. He gets so irritated by our daughter's fear of the dark. I allow the night light because I remember being afraid as a kid, heck I am still a little afraid now. (Although I had a great-grandma who saw spirits/ghosts/DEAD PEOPLE and talked about it--that is exactly what I was afraid of in the dark. Thank goodness I didn't think about it further to realize if they were real they could show up in the daytime too!)

Anywho...maybe a pen light (I think green, red or blue is less distracting than white light) or some glow necklaces, things like that might help? Also, maybe holding her, cuddling with her and trying not to show your frustration about the fear might help to calm her down. There are so many dark rides, shows & queues at WDW! With our 3 yr old last year we were doing OK until she tried the Haunted Mansion. The queue freaked her out and then she wouldn't go near anything dark for a day or so. We eventually just worked at "changing her mind" by playing i-spy or talking about fun stuff, etc. kept her busy to not notice that dark so much.

Good luck!

Oh, and at home maybe a glow bear or glo worm or flashlight could wean her off the need for the closet light?

 

[zoemurr]

glow sticks at $1 at the Dollar Tree and work wonders.

 

[asoko]

My kids used little flashlights that go on their fingers. My MIL gave them for halloween. By the time Disney came around we had 2 left, perfect 1 for each kid. They were told to point them down and I kept my eye on them to make sure they didn't bother anyone else.

My kids have a nightlight on every night. I've tried turning them off when I go to bed, but they will wake up in the middle of the night and ask for it to be turned back on. I remember being terrified of the dark, now I have trouble falling asleep if it is not pitch black. They will grow out of it and if they don't they will be responsible for their own electricity bill. I think my DH is afraid of the dark because he has to turn every light on in the house, even if he is not in the room. I can tell exactly where he's been

 

[HGD24]

Can you ask a CM to allow you to meet your group inside the attraction and skip the dark parts? That way you and your DD can still enjoy the attractions that the rest of your family is enjoying.

I'm a grown up and still have an intense fear of the dark. A man I work with told me that he has a fear of the dark as well and that he was told by a dr that it's most likely claustrophobia that causes the fear of darkness, which really does makes sense when you think about it.

 

[barnaby1]

We have the same problem with our dd who will be 3 in March. I have no advice but to say you're not alone and this isn't an unusual problem. I am reading the responses with hope it will help us too.

 

[Tam1067]

Fear of the dark is a normal part of kids' lives. Some kids are affected worse than others. Please don't blame your wife for helping your daughter cope.

My middle son is still somewhat afraid of the dark, and when we visited WDW when he was 4, he was scared of the Pooh ride because he did not like the dark. So remember--if your daughter doesn't want to go in the dark, someone gets to wait with her outside the ride while the others in the party ride. We've done that lots of times, and that's just how life is sometimes. DH and I used to take turns.

So my advice--accept that this is a temporary phase of your DD's life which like most other phases will change, and then when she's older, the whole family can go on all these rides together.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

My DD was afraid of the dark and it helped her to just have a teeny, tiny flashlight. She never even turned it on, just held it and that got her through the dark rides. I think she liked the idea that if she needed it, she had it.

She doesn't need it anymore but it sure helped alot when she was younger.

 

[RMulieri]

I would stick with glow sticks though...when we went on the nemo ride -they said all lights had to be off...and on Pirates they made the little girl in front of us shut off her flash light.But she was shining it all around and in peoples faces.

 

[momx2]

When you figure out a sure fire way to cure the fear of the dark, let me know. I'm 40 and still sleep with a light on. Ssshhhhhh....don't tell!

 

[Schmeck]

So my daughter won't even go into them. Invariably I'm sitting outside with her and missing all of the shows.

Since your wife is the one who fosters this fear, let her sit out with your daughter.

Have you talked to your daughter about why she's afraid of the dark? Could be a simple answer, and an even more simple solution.

To those who sleep with a bright light on - did you know it messes up your sleep pattern, prevents good melatonin release, and may even increase your risk for melanoma? I'll try to find the studies and post them here.

 

[Tarheel girl 1975]

We bought glow sticks that my kids wore as necklaces the whole time we were there. We were still not able to do any shows because my son can't stand them. Something about the combination of darkness and noise. We were able to go on a lot of dark rides though and he was fine. His favorite ride at Epcot was Spaceship Earth and that ride gets really dark. We did bring flashlights for Spectromagic though. My son was not happy when they turned off the lights.

 

[shoppgirl]

We missed so many rides and had break downs on others because of the dark. My 4 year old is afraid of the dark, and after a few dark rides, I just learned to skip them. She would cry and scream the entire ride. Somehow, I don't think even a flashlight would work with her. Some of the dark rides have light from the thing you are supposed to see, but she still hated being in a dark room. She freaked on the Nemo ride in Epcot, and even the Pooh ride in MK. DD still sleeps with a night light and the hallway light on! However she can take a flashlight into a dark closet and sit there and have the time of her life playing in the dark. It's being in a dark, UNKNOWN room, not knowing where the ride car is going to take you next, or not knowing what 3D image is going to fly at you next, is the scary part for her. I wish I knew how to get her over her fear of dark rides. We're going back, and it would be a shame to miss all those great rides again because she hates the dark!

 

[Schmeck]

I wish I knew how to get her over her fear of dark rides. We're going back, and it would be a shame to miss all those great rides again because she hates the dark!

There's video of almost every attraction at WDW on youtube. Why not have her watch a few each day?

 

[amys37]

This is the mom who has "fostered the fear". DH should know better than to talk about me on a board I visit too! I'm glad to see most posters are supportive of me and that it is quite normal for my daughter to use the hallway light. This is a stage of childhood that she will outgrow.

We recently went to the movies and she was quite scared. She told me she is not scared of the darkness during the movie just when it goes from lighted during the previews to more darkness before the show. So we went out and got popcorn and stuff and then came in when the movie just started. So with her, it's fear of the unknown. How dark is it actually going to get and what exactly will happen?

I like the ideas of the glow sticks and watching the rides on utube. Thanks!

And yes, I'll gladly be the one to sit outside with her if necessary.

 

[momx2]

This is the mom who has "fostered the fear". DH should know better than to talk about me on a board I visit too! I'm glad to see most posters are supportive of me and that it is quite normal for my daughter to use the hallway light. This is a stage of childhood that she will outgrow.

We recently went to the movies and she was quite scared. She told me she is not scared of the darkness during the movie just when it goes from lighted during the previews to more darkness before the show. So we went out and got popcorn and stuff and then came in when the movie just started. So with her, it's fear of the unknown. How dark is it actually going to get and what exactly will happen?

I like the ideas of the glow sticks and watching the rides on utube. Thanks!

And yes, I'll gladly be the one to sit outside with her if necessary.

Your DH is busted!!!! We sleep with a light on in the hallway and nightlights in the bathroom. Neither of my children are afraid of dark rides and never have been or at the movies. My youngest likes to sleep in the dark and closes her door. I sleep with a light on because my parents always had the hall light on growing up and I am just used to it I guess.

 

[Pumbaa_]

Thank you Amy for supporting your DD with her fear. Fear is fear, it is not rational and you can't be talked out of it, just rhough it

Some people are afraid of heights. Someof flying. Yout DD is afraid of hte dark

When you get back, let us know howe your DD did at Disney.

We took my niece when she was 3 and she went on everything age appropriate. Went back at 4.5 and she had fears she did not have at 3. Would not fo pooh, snow white (which i can see) or Peter Pan. So we skipped those. Next time, she was fine. Kids