Farting Etiquette

[Mad4Mickey]

A Pretty famous Diser who is no longer on here LOL who lives in NYC and is a Man ( bawwhhwhahahahaaa) Once "rumbled" me on a Disney bus at 1 am LOL

My son who is 21 now used to just let it out where he was when he was little and when he was he would just shrug his shoulder and say " more room out then there is in Mom"

 

[Mommy2LittleVols]

This thread made my night! I've laughed so hard I was crying. Great stories everyone!

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I was reading a news story today and an ad for this was in the sidebar ~

http://www.bettermarriageblanket.com/

I loved this:

•Contains the same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons

 

[Morganpics]

This thread made my night! I've laughed so hard I was crying. Great stories everyone!

I have to agree! I also have asthma and have been laughing so hard that now I need to use my inhaler!! Hysterical!

 

[parrothead365]

laughed so hard I farted

 

[MulanUSAF]

OMG, I just have to share this article and decided to give this thread a breath of fresh air... er, maybe not so fresh?

Malawi To Make Farting In Public Illegal

 

[DVCLiz]

I'm really impressed...you think this thread has finally dispersed but it just keeps wafting back...

 

[Jetsong]

I want you all to know that.....women do NOT fart.....we fluff

 

[Jennasis]

I want you all to know that.....women do NOT fart.....we fluff

Speak for yourself. I fart. loud and proud!

 

[BeefJerky]

Ah, my husband and I have discussed the how-to's of farting. If you do it loud and in public, make sure you are in a crowd so that no one looks at YOU. If it is silent, you are ok. Now at home, everything goes. It's ok but keep some Febreeze near by when you know it is going to be a wallpaper peeler. Don't ever do it in church, keep that bad boy in until you get out.

 

[Kat77]

This came from another Disser and thread but it was so darn funny I had to dig it up:

Second happened the other night on the bus from MK to Pop Century, it was EMH evening, we were all tired and wanting to get back to the resort, when someone on the bus passed gas, and it was TOXIC, so these two southern guys started making comments about the smell, and how bad it was, but the funniest to me was when the announcement came over the loudspeaker about taking small children by the hand, one of them said "the children are all dead, they suffocated from the smell", and believe me, it was even funnier hearing it with that southern accent, my friend and I were busting a gut we were laughing so hard after that, now whenever we smell something nasty we say to each other in a southern accent "the children are all dead,they suffocated from the smell!" and it gets us going now.
Jules

 

[cm8]

Now in my bodily function lexicon, a "turtle" is when you start to have a bowel movement, but the turd is not quite ready to come out, so after poking out a bit (or at least what feel like poking out a bit - I can't actually see it of course), it sucks itself back up into your butt, like a turtle retreating back into its shell.


It is so interesting to see what different people call these things!

, wow, one of those things you wish you never knew and that it had a name as well

 

[maslex]

I remember growing up, right before one of my parents let one rip....they would say...."low tide rolling in". And believe me, they smelled JUST like the low tide was rolling in. Absolutely horrifying!!!

Now, when they're sitting in the living room (picture two recliners with a small table in between them) they each keep an unlit yankee candle near by, so when one of them lets loose, the other one picks up the candle and puts it right under their nose so they don't have to smell each other. LOL

 

[Dax]

With 4 very gassy pugs in the house...its so easy to blame them...but half the time they ARE...Lately they have been heard letting em rip when they get up after a nap, then stretch and shake...usually the shake is enough to let em fly!

 

[Minnesota!]

classic thread! I needed this laugh so early in the AM!

I live in a house with all males....'nuf said....

 

[mtblujeans]

I taught both of my sons to *please* go to the bathroom to release gas...and they never did! Their favorite place to release was at the dinner table. To this day my youngest, who is in college, has something up his intestines that has been s l o w l y dying for years!

 

[Imzadi]

Speak for yourself. I fart. loud and proud!

I was alone, standing at a street corner very late at night, wait for the light to change so I could cross. I let one rip. Then, a man who had been obscured by standing on the other side of the lamp post and blue mail box, steps forward to take a look at who had farted. It must have been really loud. I had my earmuffs on, and I could hear it loud & clear.

 

[klmall]

Have you read the farting stories on this thread?

 

[blue_river]

Silence in public. Loud as a trumpet at home (and then blame it on the dog!).

-- Rob

 

[xanphylus]

This came from another Disser and thread but it was so darn funny I had to dig it up:

That was the one I was looking for!!! That one was so funny- I almost tooted! "The children are all dead, they suffocated from the smell!" I love it! Reminds me of our last trip to Disney- DH is def a tooter. But he is def more of a crop duster.