Family Trip - Am I wrong

[kpk89]

You are so mean! Of course you should do what your brother wants.

JUST kidding!! I totally agree with the sentiments shared so far. We're going in Jan with my inlaws (FIL and his wife, BIL, wife & their ds 12 & ds 5) FIL has been to WDW in the 70's, and has no clue, and the rest have never been. We are all staying together in a Grand Villa on our DVC points, so I sort of feel responsible for their itinerary. I told them that I was the self appointed tour guide for the trip, but not a drill sergeant. I.e., I will create a plan that suits my family, and incorporate things that everyone else will want to do too, but that I won't be offended a bit if they want to go it on their own. I just let them know that I don't want to force them to follow our plan, but neither do I want to leave them feeling lost and not knowing where to go first.

Have a great trip, and don't feel badly at all! As long as you're not pointedly excluding them from your plans, you've got nothing to feel badly about.

 

[pyrxtc]

I am doing a similiar thing. i am going for my first trip and I am planning meals and park days and whatever. but my MIL and Uncle and family are coming down and the only thing I did for them was to make hotel reservations. I mentioned I was going to the MNSSHP but they show no interest. i think that I will make one meal reservation with them but I think a lot of time will be spent doing things separately. I WILL NOT change my plans for them. They decided to join, didn't really asked but decided, and I am trying to help but they say when it gets closer. They want to decide things the week before and don't listen when I say it's too late then. I'll give them a copy of my itinerary but if they don't want to do it, then I won't force them.

 

[blitzkrieg048]

You did the right thing trust me from experience. I've been with inlaws and it's very, VERY healthy to seperate. It's your vacation too. If he wants to miss out, oh well.

 

[tinan]

Well I tend to try to plan things as well. I wouldn't call myself an over-planner. I'm not the type that needs to know what we are doing every minute of the trip. I try to get a general idea of how the week will progress and go from there. If adjustments are needed then I won't get so upset about it. For our first trip to Disney I am planning what days we want to hit which park and plan on MYW dining around where we will be.

We have vacationed with my parents to other destinations. We have come to an agreement that just because we are vacationing together that does NOT mean that we have to be around one another the entire trip. We allow flexibility among ourselves. Like mom, my youngest daughter and I love to go deep sea fishing. So we plan a time when we can do that together. While we're doing that, dad, dh, and my oldest have an opportunity to do something else they would like.

The only thing I would point out to your brother is that while you understand he does not want to have a "plan", that he may want to in the very least set up his PS's. Explain that he spent a lot of money on the Dining package and you would hate to see him not be able to utilize it. Even go on to say that he doesn't have to go to the character meals or even eat with you. I think he will be disappointed if he doesn't do at least that.

Just my opinion.

 

[HopperFan]

As the others said - you did the right thing. The only way to wing it there is if you are a regular visitor and are content with counter service for every meal and yes we have done those trips. You do what will make your trip special !!!! I would give him a list of your PS, if nothing else maybe he will understand that he needs to make PS or risk losing his dining package money.

Our experience of traveling with others.........one family wanted to wing it and other than one character meal I said okay. When we finally got them up and going all they did at the park was go from one food cart to the next...........we got so frustrated we asked to split up and meet for dinner. Whoa - their kids wanted to come with us....so needless to say we stayed together and they picked up their feet to follow, we had some time to make up for. Have gone with another family I know is always late. So we agreed to meet at a prominent location each day around 11 am. We had been since the park opened and finished half the park.......they had just gotten there at 11. But we had done so much we relaxed and enjoyed being with them the rest of the day. And then we have our great cousins that are on the SAME wave length with us each day or my sis's family that we can be honest about our different needs, and plan to meet up here and there. Everyone is different, but we are not going to forfeit a great vacation because of it, we just be together when we can and then no one feels pressure.