Family responsibility advice

[princesspumpkin]

I would appreciate your opinions in this family matter. DBIL#1 has a wife (they live in VA) and her mother (who no one has met yet) is coming to the US from her home in Russia for a visit. The 3 of them (and dog) will be coming to NJ to visit the rest of our family. DBIL#1 asked DBIL#2 if they could all stay at his house for 5 days while in town. DBIL#2 says he and his family will be out of town for the first 2 days, but they are welcome to stay with them for the last 3 days. DMIL calls DBIL#2 and questions why DBIL#1 can't stay with him for the entire time, stating that he should just allow DBIL#1 and family to have their home while they are out of town. DBIL#2 doesn't feel comfortable with this (and was a little upset that their mother became involved in this conversation). Any unbiased opinions as to what would be the right thing to do? Thanks.

 

[hessman]

It's his home, he already said he didn't feel comfortable. That should be the end of the story.

I wouldn't want anyone staying in my home ewhile I wasn't there.

 

[dianeschlicht]

Yep, his house, he makes the call. It is presumptious to think otherwise.

 

[Tiggeroo]

IT's his house. I would assume though that there was some underlying reason he doesn't want them there while he's not. I've let my siblings use my place while I'm away. But it's stressful because I feel like I have to clean the whole place first.

 

[DoeWDW]

Allowing your brother to use your house is one thing, but your brother, wife, dog & MIL no one has met??

One word - hotel!

No one would be staying in my home while I'm away!

 

[cobbler]

I agree. It is his house and if he says no then the answer is no. Why not stay with MIL for those 2 days?? At the very least, 2 nights in a hotel is not that bad, esp when you can stay the other 3 with the other brother.

 

[goodstarr]

Tiggeroo, just curious. Does there have to be an underlying reason why someone wouldn't want people (even relatives) staying at their house while they were away?

 

[holycow]

well, obviously there are issues when the mother calls ...that meant that brother had to call and complain to mommy!


Holycow

 

[LindaG4458]

My reply to such a suggestion: They could have three days or no days - their choice. There is no way that they would stay in my home when I was away.

MIL should MYOB.

 

[Disney Doll]

Heck, I have relatives I wouldn't let stay in my house whether I was at home or away!!!!!

I would not feel comfortable with most people staying in my hoiuse if I wasn't there, especially if one of them was someone I hadn't met yet.

I'd leae the offer of "3 days once I get home" on the table and tell MIL to MYOB.

 

[CEDmom]

Mommy should stay out of it . The issue is between 2 grown men not little children. If he doesn't want his brother and family to stay in his house than that's his right.

 

[momm2four]

I think he has the right since it's his house. But, me, myself, I would let my brother and his family stay in my house, no questions asked. (Although I'd prefer the dog not to be there)

I guess it depends on the relationship between family members.

Lori P.