engagement party?

[kacaju]

My brother got engaged back in Oct. I bought them an engagement gift around 2 weeks after they announced it.
Now her parents are holding an engagement party for them.
I have never been to an engagement party (20 YEARS OF BEING MARRIED AND THIS IS THE FIRST ONE!!)...is this another *gift giving* party? Since I did buy them a gift...do I need to bring another one??

 

[AKL_Megs]

Gifts aren't common, but wine is. I went to one in the fall, and brought a bottle. About 10 other guests did as well, but the majority brought nothing.

 

[Art 1]

Those are great fun. Yes they are to help the young couple out. You already gave them a gift so it would be fine to not give another, but why not.

 

[stinkerbelle's mom]

I have heard of them, but have never attended one or had anyone I know have one.

I would get them something small if you felt the need to get them something again. You could always throw in some scratch offs or lottery tickets to help pay for the wedding.

 

[kacaju]

Those are great fun. Yes they are to help the young couple out. You already gave them a gift so it would be fine to not give another, but why not.

Well, I already gave them something...then there will be the shower and then the wedding. This is my brother, so gifts will be more then what I would give friends, but seriously?? just how much can I do??
I like the bottle of wine idea, maybe get a few of the wine glass id tags and a few scratch offs, that would be cute

 

[Kae]

We had one but it was more like a big BBQ. I did get a few things Subsrcibtions to Modern Bride, a nice pen set, Love stamps-back thing postage didn't go up all the time & planners. And that was in 1988.

Kae

 

[Scurvy]

No, an engagement party is not traditionally considered a gift giving occasion. Usually, if someone does choose to give a gift it's more of a token, like a bottle of wine or a book about weddings. But most of the time people don't give gifts.

 

[Handbag Lady]

Nope, you already gave them an engagement gift. You're good for the engagement.

Chances are, you will need a shower gift and then a wedding gift. I'd wait on the shower gift to see if there is a theme. Themes seem to be popular now. You'd hate to show up with a crock pot if it is an intimate item party.

For now, be lucky you are not in the wedding party. Yet. You never know, you could get asked. And then there would be even MORE stuff to buy!

 

[kacaju]

Nope, you already gave them an engagement gift. You're good for the engagement.

Chances are, you will need a shower gift and then a wedding gift. I'd wait on the shower gift to see if there is a theme. Themes seem to be popular now. You'd hate to show up with a crock pot if it is an intimate item party.

For now, be lucky you are not in the wedding party. Yet. You never know, you could get asked. And then there would be even MORE stuff to buy!

When my brother told me he was going to ask her I told him that *we* did not have to be in the wedding!!
My brother is 10 years younger them me and will be getting married 20 years after me. I have no desire to be in a wedding party anymore!!
So they asked each of my girls to do a reading...that works out well!!

 

[scottishduffy]

My mother threw a small engagement party for myself and DH when we got engaged. I don't really recall gifts being involved at all. It was just a nice lunch at the clubhouse in my Mom's neighborhood. People came, ate, chit-chatted and that was about it.

 

[MissElizabeth]

We had a small engagement party, and recieved sentimental items- my mom gave me the handkerchief that my grandmother carried at her wedding, my MIL gave me a book of photographs of my husband as a small child. It was nice. You'll be giving them plenty of gifts in the next few months, just bring a card to the shower.

 

[aprilgail2]

Gifts aren't common, but wine is. I went to one in the fall, and brought a bottle. About 10 other guests did as well, but the majority brought nothing.

No, an engagement party is not traditionally considered a gift giving occasion. Usually, if someone does choose to give a gift it's more of a token, like a bottle of wine or a book about weddings. But most of the time people don't give gifts.

Well this must certainly be a regional thing!! Engagement parties are a gift giving occasion here- in fact people register for them so you know what to get! I think of engagement parties as just one giant gift grab- you already have to give a gift at the shower and another at the wedding so the engagement party just makes it up to 3 gifts for one occasion!!
As far as wine goes one of the last showers I went to they included registry info and then also noted that it was a "wine wishing well" and asked everyone to also bring a bottle of wine to start off the couples wine fridge with!!!!

 

[kacaju]

Well this must certainly be a regional thing!! Engagement parties are a gift giving occasion here- in fact people register for them so you know what to get! I think of engagement parties as just one giant gift grab- you already have to give a gift at the shower and another at the wedding so the engagement party just makes it up to 3 gifts for one occasion!!
As far as wine goes one of the last showers I went to they included registry info and then also noted that it was a "wine wishing well" and asked everyone to also bring a bottle of wine to start off the couples wine fridge with!!!!

GREAT...we are in NJ!!
I do know they just were at Bed Bath and Beyond for their registry.. I assumed it was just for the shower and wedding itself. There is no mention on the engagement invite about gifts

 

[msjprincess]

I always give a gift for engagement parties but it's usually something like a vase, cake plate or picture frame or a gift card to someplace like Home Depot, Sears, Bed Bath and Beyond.

 

[kacaju]

I always give a gift for engagement parties but it's usually something like a vase, cake plate or picture frame or a gift card to someplace like Home Depot, Sears, Bed Bath and Beyond.

But what if you already gave them an engagement gift? As I said, on my own, I gave them an engagement gift back in Oct. Not knowing they would have an engagement party in Jan.

 

[MomRN]

I've had friends that have had showers (baby, wedding) and not knowing what my schedule would be like, whether I would be able to attend, when I would see them again, etc. I have given the gift early and said (jokingly) I was "paid in advance" in case I could make it.

If it were me, I would go with a bottle of wine and a card just not to show up empty handed.

 

[Syrreal]

We had an engagement party, but there were no gifts. Just friends celebrating the occasion. We might have bbqd and DH's dog "may" have eaten a friend's gf's shoe (kinda on purpose) but, no gifts. Some people brought alcohol, but we all shared it.

I guess it depends on where you're from if it's a gift giving occasion. Either way, you already gave a gift so you don't have to give anything else for the party. If you want to give them a little token, great. If not, just enjoy the party.

 

[msjprincess]

But what if you already gave them an engagement gift? As I said, on my own, I gave them an engagement gift back in Oct. Not knowing they would have an engagement party in Jan.

Sorry I should have been more clear. In your case I wouldn't give another gift. I was just responding to the people that say they don't usually give gifts for an engagement party.