encopresis

[graygables]

I don't have much to add, BUT, my DH was your son (minus the pullups) 33 years ago. His mom would have to go to the school to pick him up so he could go home to have BMs. A lot of his was psychological (he has OCD), but it was a real problem for him and the way he was treated has carried with him the rest of his life. To be quite honest, our lives today are very difficult b/c of the pain from his childhood. When we go to WDW, there are times that he has to leave DDs and I in the parks to return to the resort to use the bathroom and lie down b/c he's backed up so much he's sick. I hope your DS is able to get some help quickly and that you are able to get the abuse by his peers/teachers stopped.

Secondly, I am a militant mama. I don't power dress, I don't take any cr*& and, I'm sorry, but it is NOT a partnership. The school is in the business of conserving funds, I am in the business of loving my child...those are going to be fundamentally at odds. I e-school my DDs w/ a charter (public) school, so we qualify for IEPs and interventions and such. It is like pulling teeth, but get me in a room of professionals and all I have to do is remind them that *I* am the parent, they are not, and I will make the decisions regarding my child's care...it's their job to advise me. When I walk in the room, it is *MY* meeting, *MY* agenda, I ask the questions and I take the notes. There are those, primarily those in the field of education, who will be aghast at that notion (I was an English teacher, BTW), but the schools/laws make it necessarily adversarial, hence the need for the advocacy groups. Picture yourself as the President and take it from there. Your DS needs you to stand up for him because NO ONE ELSE will.

I hope you are able to find resolution and soon, before the emotional toll gets any worse.

 

[Sandcass]

GRAYGABLES ~
I love hearing from other moms like me! I am not afraid to go against the school for the sake of MY kids! I think too many people forget that we're the parents and the schools & teachers actually WORK FOR US! I totally bucked the system in our district by choosing 1/2 day kindergarten for my DS when they switched to a full day program. He left at noon each day even tho the rest of the class stayed until 4:00! But I KNEW as his mother that he did not need full day kindergarten and I stood up for him. The district made it as difficult as possible for us, but we did it! My favorite argument from a principle was when he said "Well, I hope he's not going to be sitting around all afternoon watching cartoons" And I replied "Ya know what, some days he will be... HE'S FIVE!! He has the rest of his life to be in school!" The principle looked so stumped! He didn't know what else to say to me!

(by the way, I have incredibly bright kids, who read and do pretty much everthing else WAY ABOVE grade level)

 

[LoveTink05]

Secondly, I am a militant mama. I don't power dress, I don't take any cr*& and, I'm sorry, but it is NOT a partnership. The school is in the business of conserving funds, I am in the business of loving my child...those are going to be fundamentally at odds. I e-school my DDs w/ a charter (public) school, so we qualify for IEPs and interventions and such. It is like pulling teeth, but get me in a room of professionals and all I have to do is remind them that *I* am the parent, they are not, and I will make the decisions regarding my child's care...it's their job to advise me. When I walk in the room, it is *MY* meeting, *MY* agenda, I ask the questions and I take the notes. There are those, primarily those in the field of education, who will be aghast at that notion (I was an English teacher, BTW), but the schools/laws make it necessarily adversarial, hence the need for the advocacy groups. Picture yourself as the President and take it from there. Your DS needs you to stand up for him because NO ONE ELSE will.

I hope you are able to find resolution and soon, before the emotional toll gets any worse.

As a teacher who truly CARES about her students and their accomplishments, I find it unfair that you make such a broad statement. While it is sad that you consider your school district your enemy, many schools DO attempt to create a partnership with parents.

OP, I feel for you and I hope that you are able to get the accommodations your child deserves.

 

[Mymatisse]

As a special educator I would also like to respond....

According to the law, in order for a student to qualify for special education services, the student must have a disability AND this disability must have an educational impact which can only be remediated with specially designed instruction.... Most states used a discrepancy model to qualify children for services. However the law chagend as of July 1, 2005. States and districts still have some discretion in chosing a model, but many are moving to a RTI (response to intervention).

It is extremely unfortunate that you do not feel supported by your school. And I was really upset by the comment you made in reference to "feeling ganged up on" by the school. Unfortunately, I feel parents/guardians often view their interactions with schools as "us" against "them." Bottom line, you need to foster a partnership to help your child.

From the brief information I have read, I think the encopresis could best be accommodated using a 504 plan. I have not read anything which would support specially designed instruction for your child. 504s are used to make sure every child has access to the curriculum. What type of specially designed instruction would you request for encopresis? I received an IEP that wanted me to judge a kid on an encopresis rubric. They also wanted the school to provide counseling for the student. We are an institute for learning and providing an education. Counseling should be done with certificated mental health professionals. Most schools are more than willing to work with the mental health team. However, it should not be the obligation of the school to provide these services.

In reality, as a teacher I am part parent/guardian, advocate, counselor, etc....

I could go on.... Please work to foster your partnership.

D

I too believe this would probably be a situation where a 504 plan will come into play because it is not a permenant impairment. However, davidtutor88, I have to disagree with you on the criteria you laid out for a child to qualify for special education. I think you are only looking at learning disabilities, however, as a professional currently working in the disability services field at the college level I can tell you I see many high school graduates come into my office who have been categorized as "Other Health Impaired" and have an IEP. According to IDEA, which is the law that vhoffmans son would fall under,
9) Other health impairment means having limited strength, vitality or alertness, including a heightened alertness to environmental stimuli, that results in limited alertness with respect to the educational environment, that—

(i) Is due to chronic or acute health problems such as asthma, attention deficit disorder or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, diabetes, epilepsy, a heart condition, hemophilia, lead poisoning, leukemia, nephritis, rheumatic fever, and sickle cell anemia; and

(ii) Adversely affects a child's educational performance.

Here the question can be raised if the actual impairment encopresis, is actually acting adversely upon the child's educational performance, or is it the fact that the teacher isn't allowing him to go the the restroom? That however, is only proven by medical documentation.

Under Section 504 your son has the right to be free from discrimination as a person with a disability. Please research both paths and inquire about both at your sons meeting. Having an agreement with the teacher is not good enough, have something in writing.

Good luck to you and your soon!